The Passage is an epic journey undertaken by the biggest set of nimrods and nincompoops this side of the apocalypse. This group is so inept and moroniThe Passage is an epic journey undertaken by the biggest set of nimrods and nincompoops this side of the apocalypse. This group is so inept and moronic that I to would have hung myself in a very descriptive manner (I mean, really, the author felt like he needed to explain how someone would go about hanging themselves every time you came across a person who had done it.) Prepare for a world that suffers from the inability to call creatures what they are. Vamps or Vampires? Nope, how about glowsticks? Virals? Smokes? Jumps? At one point they get close with Dracs. I blame you Walking Dead for this attempt at renaming understood creatures.
Most of my complaints are 100 Years after the infection. So I am going to dwell there.
First off, one of the main plot points of the book was there were no radio transmissions. None! Except the one coming from Colorado. Turns out, later down the line there seems to be plenty of people out there. Not one of these groups said, "Hey, let's turn on a radio and start transmitting. We can combine forces, create trade and maybe, I dunno, help solve each other's problems?" Even an army group is walking around and not one of them said, "Hey, wouldn't it be nice to have radios? We have Humvee's, guns, and fuel. Perhaps a proper form of communication that is well understood and easy to access should be established so as to better find other survivors and to better coordinate ourselves?" No? Okay fine.
So this group is going to Colorado. TO SAVE THE WORLD! However it doesn't take much to distract this group. "Hey, we've got this colony over here, you want to stay here?" "Yea, well, I dunno, we do have this girl here who is super mysterious and seems to be able to control vampires sometimes, and, well, there is this mysterious and ambiguous radio message. What the hell, let's hang out for a while." These guys get distracted at every turn. It's like Fellowship of the Ring if Frodo had ADD.
Some of the group gets left behind. I honestly think the only purpose of this was for the commercial breaks the author brings in later. I kid you not, there is a part near the end when one of the main characters is going to have to kill another because she might be turning into a vampire. He is on top of her, knife raised above his head and... hey, let's look in on the other group of people that got left behind. It might have been okay once, but it honestly felt like a commercial break. The author didn't even bother to bring you back at the same time you left, he would bring you back sometime later and sum up what happened at that tense moment. Way to break up the emotional connection buddy.
The love crap was awful. I mean terrible. We have one girl in love with the main guy and she begins to move in on him, kinda, when they come across an army. Suddenly, it's revealed that she signed up into this army via her adopted father years ago, so yea, this love thing can't happen. Cue sexual frustration. Oh, and let's just sit here just a day's ride from the place you're trying to get to that very well might SAVE THE WORLD, while the snow moves in and well, you know, Vampires. Oh, and let's break the group up so only the Main guy and Miss Savior are the only ones that can move on. And since you are leaving the army, why not go without any guns or knives? I kid you not, he actually gives up his only knife before heading out on his own.
The group that leaves with the army suddenly has a change of heart about following the lead character when they notice a group of vamps going the same way. Did you think he wasn't in danger till now!? Suddenly they head back to help out. Why are the vamps heading that way? No clue, it's not like the actual cure is up there or anything. Cue some over-dramatic heroism, someone's needless sacrifice (again) and someone important getting hurt.
Now we end up with something that might give the humans a real tool against the vamps. Someone important died making sure they got it. This whole journey was for this. Well, can't have that, let's toss it into the fire.
The author then tries to tie everything up nicely. Ex-hubby turns up and is killed by a ghost, (not kidding). Main Female lead was being shadowed by someone important, I didn't know she was being shadowed till that very second. Oh, and we find out half the group is massacred via an archive 1000 years in the future. Yea. ...more
**spoiler alert** Not since the Celestine Prophecy have I come across a book so separated from reality that it only serves to show aspiring writers th**spoiler alert** Not since the Celestine Prophecy have I come across a book so separated from reality that it only serves to show aspiring writers that even bad books still get published. We start this adventure with the human race on the edge of extinction. Usually the threat of the complete obliteration of one's race is usually enough to drive people past such petty things like inter-departmental government politics, but not in this universe! We have a shortage of everything, unless of course it serves the plot.
We have the biggest bunch of nimrods lead by the last remaining moral compass in town. Our heroine is at first lied to, by the government, in order to turn her into a thinking zombie. She is of course pissed and convinces the government to be honest, because the looming threat of extinction wouldn't otherwise convince people to sacrifice themselves to help save humanity. Oh, and don't worry everyone that turns into a thinking zombie, we've got a cure, promise. Please ignore all our other lies, labor abuses and such. We totally won't kill you later. Promise. Excuse us while we engage in petty politics.
So, our heroine is out among the zombies and starts the process of killing them. A process she never gets used to and will of course ignore the laws of conservation of matter because since she's dead she doesn't need all those little living things like eating in order for the muscles to do their thing. Anyway, while this is all happening she discovers that among all the 28-days zombies there is some flesh eating zombies. Who could be their leader? Why, her dad, of course, that was supposedly killed years before! Oh, and we find out the the original virus was actually the gift of immortality from, Aliens! It was of course stolen by terrorists and modified to create zombies and nobody actually took the time to figure out what the original virus did before modifying it.
When we finally slog to the end we find out that our heroine was infected with the original virus by a mad scientist, well, she isn't mad, or is she? Oh, and that was the last of the original. No more, although now that she has it she can now pass it around since it is a virus, but why would she want to pass it on to the last remaining bits of humanity when she could just infect her boyfriend and walk off into the sunset?...more