I've been meaning to check this one out because it is probably as close as I'll ever get to the South Seas (unless you count Australia) and I used to...moreI've been meaning to check this one out because it is probably as close as I'll ever get to the South Seas (unless you count Australia) and I used to know the author. The fact that the national expert on tiki comes from Cleveland makes improbable sense somehow!(less)
Although I have made a decision to try to keep this page "politics and pundit-free", I am going to make one exception and include this, probably sophm...moreAlthough I have made a decision to try to keep this page "politics and pundit-free", I am going to make one exception and include this, probably sophmoric, rant against Bill-O on my list. Bill-O is a special case. Bill-O deserves a backlash and, apparently, a lot of people want to hand it to him.
Full disclosure: I don't care if this book is "objective" or if is well written. I hope it is neither and I plan to enjoy it anyway. Bill-O is neither objective nor well-spoken and he loathes people like me. I feel no guilt!
Why does he provoke me so? Well, remember back when you were a kid and there was that one kid in the neighborhood who you felt sorry for? Because his dad was the biggest prick on the block? Well, Bill-O was probably that kid...and now he has become his dad. I remember guys like Bill. They were never on hand to help build a club house or to throw the ball around the yard. All they did was go to work, come home, yell at the family and drink in front of the TV -- generally raving about ethnic minorities and women's lib "bitches".
You never wanted to go to that kid's house. You were afraid you might witness a scene. Or else, if the kid's dad was home he might make you do chores. Your parents didn't want you there either. They talked about that guy...how he was a drunk who probably beat his wife.
And that kid...the one who could not brag that his dad was a nice guy who coached a team, built cool stuff or taught him how to fish? That kid always talked about how much ass his dad could kick. You weren't sure you could believe him though. His dad struck you as a pot bellied loser. You thought the only ass this guy had kicked in years was his skinny kid's.
It's just me...but Bill-O sounds a lot like that guy. He even looks like that guy. It is hard to wrap my mind around why so many people in this country knowingly "invite" him into their homes night after night by way of his gassy on-air proclamations and belligerent know-it-all books. Yet, it happens.
Two final thoughts for Bill-O:
One is his ludicrous "war on Christmas". We all know Bill-O feels extremely threatened when he is greeted with, in his mind, the sinister multicultural "happy holidays" between Thanksgiving and the first of the year. If Bill-O was truly the spokesperson for the common guy that he paints himself to be, he would have worked at least one crap customer service or retail job in his life. And he would understand that these beleagured employees would celebrate almost any holiday you could create (happy national liposuction day!) if it meant they could get a damn day off from their miserable lives of serving the self-centered, profane and insane general public. We are not forcing anyone to celebrate the solstice, dude. We're just on our knees in gratitude that, for the only time all year, the store will be closed for 2 days (Christmas and New Year's Day).
And all that moral posturing? If you have a mouth like a sewer, Bill...and a bullying attitude to match...if you are a chronic exaggerator and a harasser of women...if you label entire segments of society as people who need to be "dealt with"...and if you look and act like the neighborhood drunk...don't be surprised if someone writes a book like this about you...and if lots of people eat it up, whether it is any good or not.(less)