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Quotes About Sandwich

Quotes tagged as "sandwich" (showing 1-30 of 37)
Jarod Kintz
“With faith the size of a mustard seed, you can indeed move a mountain, but you can hardly be expected to garnish your sandwich.”
Jarod Kintz, American Association for the Advancement of Aardvarks Presents: Dear Natalie

Jarod Kintz
“If there are two clones, one good and one evil, I can’t kill on sight alone. It’s the same with love. Some love hurts, and some love elevates, but as to which one is which, they are two sides to the same sandwich.
”
Jarod Kintz, This Book Has No Title

Julia Quinn
“Gregory,” she said, “you cannot leave me here. What if someone finds you and removes you from the house? Who will know I am here? And what if…and what if…and then what if…”
He smiled, enjoying her officiousness too much to actually listen to her words. She was definitely herself again.
“When this is all over,” he said, “I shall bring you a sandwich.”
That stopped her short. “A sandwich? A sandwich?”
Julia Quinn, On the Way to the Wedding

Jarod Kintz
“How do two retards eat a turd sandwich? Well, not by first wiping their ass with wheat bread like I showed them.
”
Jarod Kintz, How to construct a coffin with six karate chops

Jarod Kintz
“I had a dream about you. You had a bottle made of smoky glass, which made the contents appear mysterious, and I had the last smoky exhalation of a dead smoker in a Ziploc bag. I offered to trade my sandwich for your drink, but you said, “No thanks, I’m asexual.”
Jarod Kintz, We Had A #Dream About You

Jarod Kintz
“Tonight at 8:00. My bed. Bring a friend, and I’ll show you how to make a Snuggle Sandwich.
”
Jarod Kintz, Sleepwalking is restercise

Jarod Kintz
“Love is like yesterday, today, and tomorrow rolled up into one big Maybe Sandwich. I’ll take two, to go.
”
Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. And the ageless sages.

Jarod Kintz
“I had a dream about you. You were saving your love for another man, so I gave you a bigger Ziploc bag to save it in, because if you’re going to make that relationship work, you’ve got to give more than what you gave to me. Later I regretted giving you my Ziploc bag, because I was left with no place to store my sandwich so I had to rent a locker at the local YMCA.
”
Jarod Kintz, We Had A #Dream About You

Jarod Kintz
“I had a dream about you. You were hungry, so I made you a binocular sandwich, which is peeping power between two slices of bread. You were a hungry pervert, so I thought it perfect.
”
Jarod Kintz, We Had A #Dream About You

Jarod Kintz
“When somebody asks me if they can fix me a sandwich, I say, “No thanks. The one I have isn’t broken.”
”
Jarod Kintz, Whenever You're Gone, I'm Here For You

Jarod Kintz
“I had a dream about you. The lettuce in my sandwich was crunchier than your conversation, and all I could hear when you spoke was myself chewing. You made such a tasty conversation that I can’t even remember what you said. 
”
Jarod Kintz, I had a dream about you 2

Jarod Kintz
“I folded my map in half and used it to make a sandwich. Then I dipped it in coffee and ate all of Europe and half of Russia.”
Jarod Kintz, I love Blue Ribbon Coffee

Jarod Kintz
“We made love like we made grilled cheese sandwiches. Did the sandwiches cause us to have sex? Did one bullet lead to WWI?
”
Jarod Kintz, Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.

Jarod Kintz
“Love is like holding a baloney sandwich for a friend. That was over two years ago, and I’m still holding it. I wonder if he’s coming back any time soon. He must be starving by now.
”
Jarod Kintz, Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.

Jarod Kintz
“Everything can be used as a weapon, including love. My love looks like a butter knife, but I assure you, it is quite deadly. I would demonstrate, but I’m right in the middle of making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, so you’ll just have to believe me.”
Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. And the ageless sages.

Jarod Kintz
“Love and marriage go together like peanut butter and anal lube. Can I fix you a marital sandwich?
”
Jarod Kintz, Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.

Jarod Kintz
“I eat meat. Dinosaur. Does your love resemble a roast beef sandwich? If so, it’s just too so-so for my taste.”
Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

Jarod Kintz
“I’m the founder of LBAS, or Lunch Boxes Against Sandwiches. It’s an outlet of love.
”
Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. And the ageless sages.

“The idea of a sandwich as a snack goes back to Roman times. Scandinavians perfected the technique with the Danish open-faced sandwich, or smorroebrod, consisting of thinly sliced, buttered bread and many delectable toppings.”
DeeDee Stovel, Picnic: 125 Recipes with 29 Seasonal Menus

Jarod Kintz
“Love sounds like a sandwich, I think as I chew while wearing my earplugs.
”
Jarod Kintz, Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.

Jarod Kintz
“I make love like I make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches—with two layers of sanitation gloves and emphatic waves of hello and goodbye.
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time

Jarod Kintz
“I made a Lindsey Sandwich out of two Jennifers and a Jessica. Then I ate it like I make love—alone, in the corner, with a box of tissues and lots of tears.
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time

Jarod Kintz
“You can lead a horse you water, but you can’t convert it to a camel. Have you ever made love to an egg-salad sandwich that you named Denise?
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time

Jarod Kintz
“I love ham, grilled cheese, and peanut butter and jelly. Comma, comma, and comma, because otherwise it would read grilled cheese and peanut butter and jelly, grouped together, which would make a weird sandwich.
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time

Jarod Kintz
“Lunchmeat tastes like my dick, only thicker. Can I get you a Love Sandwich?
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time

Jarod Kintz
“We had the perfect relationship. That’s great, if what I wanted was love. But it wasn’t. All I wanted was an orgasm and a sandwich.
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time

Jarod Kintz
“I believe in love like a flower bud might believe in Buddha. But, then, I’m a romantic, and you know that because in the last presidential election I voted for Grilled Cheese Sandwich.
”
Jarod Kintz, Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.

Jarod Kintz
“We made love like a sandwich in June. I was the May and she was the July. Then I met her friend April, and I fell in love like a melting piano in a microwave that’s in a refrigerator.
”
Jarod Kintz, Love Quotes for the Ages. Specifically Ages 19-91.

Jarod Kintz
“Networking without caring about other people is like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich minus the jelly and the peanut butter. I’m out of both, but I did write them on my grocery list.”
Jarod Kintz, #Networking is people looking for people looking for people

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