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Quotes About Classic Insult

Quotes tagged as "classic-insult" (showing 1-27 of 27)
Mark Twain
“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
Mark Twain

Oscar Wilde
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
Oscar Wilde

Dorothy Parker
“Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.”
Dorothy Parker

“Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
Exchange between Lady Astor and Lord Birkenhead—
F.E. Smith, Lord Birkenhead

Groucho Marx
“I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.”
Groucho Marx

Winston Churchill
“A lady came up to me one day and said 'Sir! You are drunk', to which I replied 'I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly.”
Winston Churchill

Winston Churchill
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."

[On British Labour politician Stafford Cripps.]
Winston Churchill, Wealth, War, and Wisdom

P.G. Wodehouse
“He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when he wanted to eat, but certainly no more.”
P.G. Wodehouse

Oscar Wilde
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
Oscar Wilde

George Bernard Shaw
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend ... if you have one."
— George Bernard Shaw, playwright (to Winston Churchill)

"Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second, if there is one."
— Churchill's response
George Bernard Shaw

Dorothy Parker
“That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them.”
Dorothy Parker, While Rome Burns

Mae West
“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”
Mae West

Mark Twain
“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”
Mark Twain

Clarence Darrow
“Every instinct that is found in any man is in all men. The strength of the emotion may not be so overpowering, the barriers against possession not so insurmountable, the urge to accomplish the desire less keen. With some, inhibitions and urges may be neutralized by other tendencies. But with every being the primal emotions are there. All men have an emotion to kill; when they strongly dislike some one they involuntarily wish he was dead. I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.”
Clarence Darrow, The Story of My Life

Moses Hadas
“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book. I'll waste no time reading it.”
Moses Hadas

Benjamin Disraeli
“A member of Parliament to Disraeli: 'Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.'

That depends, Sir,' said Disraeli, 'whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”
Benjamin Disraeli

Billy Wilder
“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.”
Billy Wilder

“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.”
Stephen Bishop

Winston Churchill
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend ... if you have one."
— George Bernard Shaw, playwright (to Winston Churchill)
"Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second, if there is one."
— Churchill's response
Winston Churchill

Dorothy Parker
“If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.”
Dorothy Parker, While Rome Burns

Andrew Lang
“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination.”
Andrew Lang

Dorothy Parker
“She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.”
Dorothy Parker

“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.”
Forrest Tucker

Winston Churchill
“An old battleax of a woman said to Winston Churchill, "If you were my husband I would put poison in your tea." Churchill's response, "Ma'am if you were my wife I would drink it.”
Winston Churchill

Samuel Foote
“He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.”
Samuel Foote, The Life of Johnson, Vol 4

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.”
Paul Keating

Benjamin Disraeli
“He was distinguished for ignorance; for he had only one idea, and that was wrong.”
Benjamin Disraeli

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