"But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?"
— Mark Twain

"...Consequently, if you believe God made Satan, you must realize that all Satan's power comes from God and so that Satan is simply God's child, and that we are God's children also. There are no children of Satan, really.
- Armand"
— Anne Rice (Interview With the Vampire)

"We may not pay Satan reverence, for that would be indiscreet, but we can at least respect his talents."
— Mark Twain

"Suppose neutral angels were able to talk, Yahweh and Lucifer – God and Satan, to use their popular titles – into settling out of court. What would be the terms of the compromise? Specifically, how would they divide the assets of their early kingdom?

Would God be satisfied the loaves and fishes and itty-bitty thimbles of Communion wine, while Satan to have the red-eye gravy, eighteen-ounce New York Stakes, and buckets of chilled champagne? Would God really accept twice-a-month lovemaking for procreative purposes and give Satan the all night, no-holds-barred, nasty “can’t-get-enough-of-you” hot-as-hell-fucks?

Think about it. Would Satan get New Orleans, Bangkok, and the French Riviera and God get Salt Lake City? Satan get ice hockey, God get horseshoes? God get bingo, Satan get stud poker? Satan get LSD; God, Prozac? God get Neil Simon; Satan Oscar Wilde?"
— Tom Robbins

"Everything will turn out right, the world is built on that."
— Mikhail Bulgakov (The Master and Margarita)

"Why worry about minor little details like clean air, clean water, safe ports and the safety net when Jesus is going to give the world an "Extreme Makeover: Planet Edition" right after he finishes putting Satan in his place once and for all?"
— Arianna Huffington

"Minister: Welcome, brother! Do you reject Satan and all his works?
Bunny Breckinridge: Sure."
— Tim Burton

"Awake, arise or be for ever fall’n."
— John Milton (Paradise Lost)

"Farewell, happy fields, where joy forever dwells! Hail, horrors! Hail, Infernal World! and thou, profoundest Hell, receive thy new possessor- one who brings a mind not to be changed by place or time. The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a Heaven of Hell, and a Hell of Heaven... Here at least we shall be free, th' almighty hath not built here for his envy, will not drive us hence: here we may reign secure; and, in my choice, to reign is worth ambition, though in Hell: Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven."
— John Milton (Paradise Lost)

"Why is Santa an anagram for Satan? I mean, besides the fact that both have the same amounts of the same letters. Just consider the many other similarities between the two figures: both of them are red, both of them like to laugh, both of them give presents to children and both of them are kings of an ungodly underworld of unspeakable horror and suffering. Coincidence? I THINK NOT."
— Sam Logan

"Thou art my father, thou my author, thou my being gav'st me; whom should I obey but thee? whom follow? thou wilt bring me soon to that new world of light and bliss, among the gods who live at ease, where I shall reign at thy right hand voluptuous, as beseems they daughter and thy darling, without end."
— John Milton (Paradise Lost)

"...Never can true reconcilement grow where wounds of deadly hate have pierced so deep..."
— John Milton (Paradise Lost)

"Oil they would buy from anyone. From Satan."
— Christopher Buckley (Florence of Arabia: A Novel)

"They changed their minds, Flew off, and into strange vagaries fell."
— John Milton