"As I am sure you know, when people say "It's my pleasure", they usually mean something along the lines of, "There's nothing on Earth I would rather do less."[...]"
— Lemony Snicket (The Penultimate Peril)

"Nay, but prithee, with sprinkles 'pon it instead," I said solemnly, "and frosting of white."
— Jim Butcher (Small Favor)

"One needs no particular talent to be polite. On the contrary, being nice is what's left when you've failed at everything else."
— Diane Setterfield (The Thirteenth Tale)

"Politeness. Now there's a poor man's virtue if ever there was one. What's so admirable about inoffensiveness, I should like to know. After all, it's easily achieved. One needs no particular talent to be polite. On the contrary, being nice is what's left when you've failed at everything else. People with ambition don't give a damn what other people think about them."
— Diane Setterfield (The Thirteenth Tale)

"Be sincere, Be brief, Be seated."
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

"It is a wise thing to be polite; consequently, it is a stupid thing to be rude. To make enemies by unnecessary and willful incivility, is just as insane a proceeding as to set your house on fire. For politeness is like a counter--an avowedly false coin, with which it is foolish to be stingy."
— Arthur Schopenhauer (The Wisdom of Life and Counsels and Maxims)