"You spend your whole life trying to get people to like you and then you run over one person with your car - not even one of the popular ones - and everybody gets on your case. Doesn't make any sense."
— Michael Scott

"I never avoid something that challenges my guts and my heart. While I might occasionally puke my guts out, I have never puked my heart out."
— Michael Scott

"Don't ever for any reason do anything to anyone for any reason ever. No matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been... EVER. For any reason whatsoever."
— Michael Scott

"The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity. Without it, no real success is possible, no matter whether it is on a section gang, a football field, in an army, or in an office."
— Dwight D. Eisenhower

"Well, sometimes my stomach hurts when you come into my office, so it's problably psychological."
— Michael Scott

"Yet for all the depression no one ever quit. When someone quit, we couldn't believe it. 'I'm becoming a rafting instructor on the Colorado River,' they said. 'I'm touring college towns with my garage band.' We were dumbfounded. It was like they were from another planet. Where had they found the derring-do? What would they do about car payments? We got together for going away drinks on their final day and tried to hide our envy while reminding ourselves that we still had the freedom and luxury to shop indiscriminately."
— Joshua Ferris (Then We Came to the End)

""I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."
(Washington DC, 12 May, 2008)"
— George W. Bush

"You think you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it’s only some bugger with a torch bringing you more work."
— David Brent

"Never hide your head in the sand - you'll only get your ass kicked!"
— A work colleague

"- Do you ever watch Battlestar Galactica?
- No.
- 'No.' Then you are an idiot.
"
— Dwight K. Schrute

"Canada Post doesn't really charge 32 cents for a stamp. It's 2 cents for postage, and 30 cents for storage."
— Gerald Regan

"Avoid employing unlucky people - throw half of the pile of CVs in the bin without reading them.
"
— David Brent

"I come to the office each morning and stay for long hours doing what has to be done to the best of my ability. And when you've done the best you can, you can't do any better."
— Harry S. Truman

""In the years afterward, I fled whenever somebody began to understand me. That has subsided. But one thing remained: I don't want anybody to understand me completely. I want to go through life unknown. The blindness of others is my safety and my freedom."

"
— Pascal Mercier

"Drugs: lets not and say we did."
— Michael Scott (the office)

""Would I rather be feared or loved? Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.""
— Michael Scott

"The Nazis are not justified by saying,

Don't you know that there is more than just the issue of the Jews? The issues are more complex than that! What of the poor in this country, who cannot afford housing? What about the sick and malnourished? Don't you care about these people? Don't you claim to be a follower of Jesus?!

Supporting a murderous political agenda with such an argument is tragic!

And what do we know about Obama? He is the single most anti-life proponent that has ever run for the office of president. "
— Joseph Bayly

"Jim Halpert: Hey, uh, can I talk to you about something?
Pam Beesley: About when you want to give me more of your money?
Jim Halpert: No, I...
Pam Beesley: Did you want to do that now? We can go inside. I'm feeling kind of good tonight.
Jim Halpert: I was just... I am in love with you.
Pam Beesley: [No longer smiling] What?
Jim Halpert: I'm really sorry if that's weird for you to hear, but I needed you to hear it. Probably not good timing. I know that, I just...
Pam Beesley: [Stunned] What are you doing? What do you expect me to say to that?
Jim Halpert: I just needed you to know. Once.
Pam Beesley: Well, I... I can't...
Jim Halpert: Yeah...
Pam Beesley: You have no idea...
Jim Halpert: Don't do that...
Pam Beesley: ...what your friendship means to me.
Jim Halpert: C'mon. I don't want to do that. I want to be more than that.
Pam Beesley: I can't.
[a small tear runs down Jim's face]
Pam Beesley: I'm really sorry... if you misinterpreted things. It's probably my fault.
Jim Halpert: [Trying to recover] Not your fault. I'm sorry I misinterpreted our friendship. "
— The Office