wanderaven > wanderaven's Quotes

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  • #1
    David Sedaris
    “I haven't the slightest idea how to change people, but still I keep a long list of prospective candidates just in case I should ever figure it out.”
    David Sedaris, Naked


  • #2
    Lani Diane Rich
    “You have to watch your language. People will think you have no fucking class”
    Lani Diane Rich


  • #3
    Neil Gaiman
    “I've been making a list of the things they don't teach you at school. They don't teach you how to love somebody. They don't teach you how to be famous. They don't teach you how to be rich or how to be poor. They don't teach you how to walk away from someone you don't love any longer. They don't teach you how to know what's going on in someone else's mind. They don't teach you what to say to someone who's dying. They don't teach you anything worth knowing.”
    Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones


  • #4
    Hugh Laurie
    “Death and disaster are at our shoulders every second of our lives, trying to get at us. Missing, a lot of the time. A lot of miles on the motorway without a front wheel blow-out. A lot of viruses that slither through our bodies without snagging. A lot of pianos that fall a minute after we've passed. Or a month, it makes no difference. So unless were going to get down on our knees and give thanks every time disaster misses, it makes no sense to moan when it strikes.”
    Hugh Laurie, The Gun Seller


  • #5
    Steve Toltz
    “Let’s not mince words: the inside of the Sydney casino looks as if Vegas had an illegitimate child with Liberace’s underpants, and that child fell down a staircase and hit its head on the edge of a spade.”
    Steve Toltz, A Fraction of the Whole


  • #6
    Kurt Vonnegut
    “1492. As children we were taught to memorize this year with pride and joy as the year people began living full and imaginative lives on the continent of North America. Actually, people had been living full and imaginative lives on the continent of North America for hundreds of years before that. 1492 was simply the year sea pirates began to rob, cheat, and kill them.”
    Kurt Vonnegut


  • #7
    Mark Twain
    “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime.”
    Mark Twain, The Innocents Abroad/Roughing It


  • #8
    Hugh Laurie
    “Happiness is the twinkle in your grandmother's eye as you reverse the tractor off her legs.”
    Hugh Laurie


  • #9
    Ray Bradbury
    “What's the point of having a library full of books you've already read?”
    Ray Bradbury


  • #10
    Woodrow Wilson
    “If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.”
    Woodrow Wilson


  • #11
    Terry Pratchett
    “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
    Terry Pratchett, Diggers


  • #12
    Dr. Seuss
    “Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”
    Dr. Seuss


  • #13
    Neil Gaiman
    “Life is a disease: sexually transmitted, and invariably fatal.”
    Neil Gaiman


  • #14
    Jerome K. Jerome
    “I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.”
    Jerome K. Jerome


  • #15
    Nick Hornby
    “Please stop patronizing those who are reading a book - The Da Vinci Code, maybe- because they are enjoying it. For a start, none of us know what kind of an effort this represents for the individual reader. It could be his or her first full-length adult novel; it might be the book that finally reveals the purpose and joy of reading to someone who has hitherto been mystified by the attraction books exert on others. And anyway, reading for enjoyment is what we should all be doing. I don't mean we should all be reading chick lit or thrillers (although if that's what you want to read, it's fine by me, because here's something no one else will tell you: if you don't read the classics, or the novel that won this year's Booker Prize, then nothing bad will happen to you; more importantly,nothing good will happen to you if you do); I simply mean that turning pages should not be like walking through thick mud. The whole purpose of books is that we read them, and if you find you can't, it might not be your inadequacy that's to blame. "Good" books can be pretty awful sometimes.”
    Nick Hornby, Housekeeping vs. the Dirt


  • #16
    Lemony Snicket
    “It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one. We all know that our time in this world is limited, and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things.”
    Lemony Snicket, Horseradish


  • #17
    Roger A. Caras
    “If you don't own a dog, at least one, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you, but there may be something wrong with your life.”
    Roger A. Caras


  • #18
    Oscar Wilde
    “I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”
    Oscar Wilde, The Happy Prince and Other Stories


  • #19
    Oscar Wilde
    “This wallpaper is dreadful, one of us will have to go.”
    Oscar Wilde


  • #20
    Steve Toltz
    “Regrets came up and asked me if I’d like to own them. Declined them for the most part but took a few just so I wouldn’t leave this relationship empty handed.”
    Steve Toltz, A Fraction of the Whole


  • #21
    Audrey Niffenegger
    “Julia thought him beautiful, though she knew it was the beauty of damage.”
    Audrey Niffenegger


  • #22
    Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
    “Nothing is worth more than this day.”
    Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


  • #23
    Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
    “There is nothing more dreadful than imagination without taste.”
    Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


  • #24
    Garrison Keillor
    “When in doubt, look intelligent.”
    Garrison Keillor


  • #25
    Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.
    “Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.”
    Lemony Snicket, Horseradish


  • #26
    Vita Sackville-West
    “I miss you even more than I could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal.”
    Vita Sackville-West


  • #27
    Kurt Vonnegut
    “Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops.”
    Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five


  • #28
    Anthony Bourdain
    “We know, for instance, that there is a direct, inverse relationship between frequency of family meals and social problems. Bluntly stated, members of families who eat together regularly are statistically less likely to stick up liquor stores, blow up meth labs, give birth to crack babies, commit suicide, or make donkey porn. If Little Timmy had just had more meatloaf, he might not have grown up to fill chest freezers with Cub Scout parts.”
    Anthony Bourdain, Medium Raw: A Bloody Valentine to the World of Food and the People Who Cook
    tags: food


  • #29
    Alice Steinbach
    “And who's to say that just because something lasts only a short time, it has little value?”
    Alice Steinbach, Without Reservations: The Travels of an Independent Woman


  • #30
    Orhan Pamuk
    “As always after drinking too much, I felt like my own ghost trying to take it's first solo walk outside the body.”
    Orhan Pamuk, The Museum of Innocence




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