Lizbith > Lizbith's Quotes

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  • #1
    Janet Evanovich
    “My professional aspirations were simple - I wanted to be an intergalactic princess.”
    Janet Evanovich

  • #2
    Janet Evanovich
    “Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth.”
    Janet Evanovich

  • #3
    Janet Evanovich
    “I looked over at him. "Is that a proposal?"

    There was total silence for a couple beats. "I'm not sure. It just popped out."

    "Let me know when you're sure."

    "Would you say yes?" Morelli asked.

    "I'm not sure.”
    Janet Evanovich, Fearless Fourteen

  • #4
    Janet Evanovich
    “I hate mornings. They start so early.”
    Janet Evanovich, Plum Spooky

  • #5
    Janet Evanovich
    “Its always nice to have a stud muffin at the table.”
    Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

  • #6
    Janet Evanovich
    “Arson is a respected profession among certain subcultures in Jersey, and the good ones don't get caught. The good ones channel lightning and mysterious acts of spontaneous combustion.”
    Janet Evanovich, Twelve Sharp

  • #7
    Janet Evanovich
    “Then I had to decide if I needed to wear shoes that kicked ass or were good for ass kicking, on account of there's a difference you know. ~ Finger Lickin' Fifteen”
    Janet Evanovich

  • #8
    Janet Evanovich
    “You could be the Mega Mage of wizards. You could rule Minionfire.
    Do you really think so?'
    Yeah, but you'd have to make a deal with the wood elves.'
    I don't like the wood elves.'
    They're okay. They're misunderstood.”
    Janet Evanovich

  • #9
    Janet Evanovich
    “Ranger is an unusual name," she managed. "Is it a nickname?"
    It's a street name," Ranger said. "I was a Ranger in the army."
    I heard about them Rangers on TV," Grandma said. "I heard they get dogs pregnant."
    My father's mouth dropped open and a piece of ham fell out.
    My mother froze, her fork poised in midair.
    That's sort of a joke," I told Grandma. "Rangers don't get dogs pregnant in real life."
    I looked at Ranger for corroboration and got another smile.”
    Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

  • #10
    Janet Evanovich
    “Good thing he's dead," Lula said, "or that would have hurt like the devil.”
    Janet Evanovich, Hot Six

  • #11
    Janet Evanovich
    “Has it ever occurred to you that you might be delusional?'

    That's what the psychiatrist said, but I think he's wrong. There's an evil flying pizza out there, and it's got Brenda's name on it.”
    Janet Evanovich, Fearless Fourteen

  • #12
    Janet Evanovich
    “I'm sorry about your Porsche."

    "I can replace the Porsche. I can't replace you. You need to be more careful."

    I was just sitting in your car!"

    Babe, you're a magnet for disaster.”
    Janet Evanovich, Eleven on Top

  • #13
    Janet Evanovich
    “I have bad car juju."
    -Stephanie Plum”
    Janet Evanovich, Plum Spooky

  • #14
    Janet Evanovich
    “Fine. Let Ranger get someone else. Trust me, you don't want to be out looking for a parking place on Sloane in the middle of the night."

    "I won't have to look for a parking place. Tank's picking me up."

    "Your working with a guy name Tank?"

    "He's big."

    "Jesus", Morelli said. "I had to fall in love with a woman who works with a guy named Tank."

    "You love me?"

    "Of course I love you. I just don't want to marry you.”
    Janet Evanovich, High Five

  • #15
    Janet Evanovich
    “You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms."
    Joe Morelli”
    Janet Evanovich, Four to Score

  • #16
    Janet Evanovich
    “Adaptation is one of the great advantages to being born and bred in Jersey. We're simply not bested by bad air or tainted water. We're like that catfish with lungs. Take us out of our environment and we can grow whatever body parts we need to survive. After Jersey the rest of the country's a piece of cake. You want to send someone into a fallout zone? Get him from Jersey. He'll be fine.”
    Janet Evanovich, Three to Get Deadly

  • #17
    Janet Evanovich
    “The golden years are for pussies. We went straight to brass.”
    Janet Evanovich, Fearless Fourteen

  • #18
    Janet Evanovich
    “Give me the gun." Ranger said.
    I extracted the gun from my pants and handed it over.
    Ranger held the gun in the pulm of his hand and smiled. "It's warm," he said. He put the gun in the glove compartment and plugged the key into the ignition.
    Am I fired?"
    No. Any women who can heat up a gun like that is worth keeping around.”
    Janet Evanovich, Eleven on Top

  • #19
    Janet Evanovich
    “Just because i know how to change a guys oil doesn't mean i want to spend the rest of my life on my back, staring up his undercarriage.”
    Janet Evanovich, Metro Girl

  • #20
    Janet Evanovich
    “Suppose something goes wrong? Suppose you need a big full-figure woman like me to help straighten things out?"
    Lula”
    Janet Evanovich, Four to Score

  • #21
    Janet Evanovich
    “Stephanie,' Valerie said. 'She's going to have a baby, and she's getting married.'
    My father was confused. He looked around the room. No Joe. No Ranger. His eyes locked on Diesel. 'Not the psycho,' he said.
    Diesel blew out a sigh.
    My father turned to my mother. 'Get me the carving knife. Make sure it's sharp.”
    Janet Evanovich, Plum Lovin'

  • #22
    Janet Evanovich
    “You think I'm gonna feel better eatin' a carrot? Get a grip. There's two idiots out there trying to kill me, and you think I'm gonna waste my last breath on a vegetable? (Lula)”
    Janet Evanovich, Finger Lickin' Fifteen

  • #23
    Janet Evanovich
    “Who's the best person you know. Of all the people you know personally, is there anyone who has a sense of right and wrong and lives by it? This was a sticky question because it would have to be Ranger ...but I suspected he occasionally killed people. Only bad people, of course, but still...”
    Janet Evanovich

  • #24
    Janet Evanovich
    “Lula's borderline too much of a good thing in lots of ways. It isn't exactly that Lula is fat; it's more that she's too short for her weight and her clothes are too small for the volume of flesh she carries.”
    Janet Evanovich, Plum Lucky

  • #25
    Janet Evanovich
    “Oh good. I love being bait for a homicidal mutilator."
    Stephanie Plum”
    Janet Evanovich, Two for the Dough

  • #26
    Janet Evanovich
    “My father would eat cat shit if it was salted, fried, or frosted, but it took an act of Congress to get him to eat a vegetable.”
    Janet Evanovich, Two for the Dough

  • #27
    Charles Eames
    “Eventually everything connects - people, ideas, objects. The quality of the connections is the key to quality per se.”
    Charles Eames



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