"Punctuality is the virtue of the bored."
— Evelyn Waugh

"Soon someone would say the fatal words, "Well, I think it’s time for me to go to bed."
— Evelyn Waugh (Vile Bodies)

"Charm is the great English blight. It does not exist outside these damp islands. It spots and kills anything it touches. It kills love; it kills art; I greatly fear, my dear Charles, it has killed you."
— Evelyn Waugh

"We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for ours to amuse them."
— Evelyn Waugh

"Money is only useful when you get rid of it. It is like the odd card in Old Maid; the player who is finally with it has lost."
— Evelyn Waugh

"I have a good mind not to take Aloysius to Venice. I don't want him to meet a lot of horrid Italian bears and pick up bad habits."
— Evelyn Waugh (Brideshead Revisited)