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  • Frank Zappa
    "So many books, so little time."
    Frank Zappa


  • Jaroslav Hašek
    "'Jesus Christ was innocent too,' said Svejk, 'and all the same they crucified him. No one anywhere has ever worried about a man being innocent. Maul halten und weiter dienen ['Grin and bear it and get on with the job'] - as they used to tell us in the army. That's the best and finest thing of all.'"
    Jaroslav Hašek (The Good Soldier Svejk: and His Fortunes in the World War)


  • Evelyn Waugh
    "Punctuality is the virtue of the bored."
    Evelyn Waugh


  • Evelyn Waugh
    "There's only one great evil in the world today. Despair."
    Evelyn Waugh (Vile Bodies)


  • Douglas Adams

  • Douglas Adams
    "They shrugged at each other. Fook composed himself. "O Deep Thought computer," he said, "the task we have designed you to perform is this. We want you to tell us...." he paused, "The Answer."
    "The Answer?" said Deep Thought. "The Answer to what?"
    "Life!" urged Fook.
    "The Universe!" said Lunkwill.
    "Everything!" they said in chorus.
    Deep Thought paused for a moment's reflection.
    "Tricky," he said finally.
    "But can you do it?"
    Again, a significant pause.
    "Yes," said Deep Thought, "I can do it."
    "There is an answer?" said Fook with breathless excitement.
    "Yes," said Deep Thought. "Life, the Universe, and Everything. There is an answer. But, I'll have to think about it."
    Ford glanced impatiently at his watch.
    "How long?" he said.
    "Seven and a half million years."
    Lunkwill and Fook blinked at each other.
    "Seven and a half million years!" they cried in chorus.
    "Yes." said Deep Thought.

    [Seven and a half million years later.... Fook and Lunkwill are long gone, but their ancestors continue what they started]

    "We are the ones who will hear," said Phouchg, "the answer to the great question of Life....!"
    "The Universe...!" said Loonquawl.
    "And Everything...!"
    "Shhh," said Loonquawl with a slight gesture. "I think Deep Thought is preparing to speak!"
    There was a moment's expectant pause while panels slowly came to life on the front of the console. Lights flashed on and off experimentally and settled down into a businesslike pattern. A soft low hum came from the communication channel.

    "Good Morning," said Deep Thought at last.
    "Er..good morning, O Deep Thought" said Loonquawl nervously, "do you have...er, that is..."
    "An Answer for you?" interrupted Deep Thought majestically. "Yes, I have."
    The two men shivered with expectancy. Their waiting had not been in vain.
    "There really is one?" breathed Phouchg.
    "There really is one," confirmed Deep Thought.
    "To Everything? To the great Question of Life, the Universe and everything?"
    "Yes."
    Both of the men had been trained for this moment, their lives had been a preparation for it, they had been selected at birth as those who would witness the answer, but even so they found themselves gasping and squirming like excited children.
    "And you're ready to give it to us?" urged Loonsuawl.
    "I am."
    "Now?"
    "Now," said Deep Thought.
    They both licked their dry lips.
    "Though I don't think," added Deep Thought. "that you're going to like it."
    "Doesn't matter!" said Phouchg. "We must know it! Now!"
    "Now?" inquired Deep Thought.
    "Yes! Now..."
    "All right," said the computer, and settled into silence again. The two men fidgeted. The tension was unbearable.
    "You're really not going to like it," observed Deep Thought.
    "Tell us!"
    "All right," said Deep Thought. "The Answer to the Great Question..."
    "Yes..!"
    "Of Life, the Universe and Everything..." said Deep Thought.
    "Yes...!"
    "Is..." said Deep Thought, and paused.
    "Yes...!"
    "Is..."
    "Yes...!!!...?"
    "Forty-two," said Deep Thought, with infinite majesty and calm."
    Douglas Adams (Life, the Universe and Everything)


  • Douglas Adams
    "If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now."
    Douglas Adams (The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)



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