Luther's quotes

(showing 1-50 of 319)

"there is only one type of people on this planet: morons
there are, however, two types of morons : one knows and the other is in denial"
— L. F. Aday

tags: humor
1 person liked it

"I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me."
— Woody Allen (Annie Hall)

32 people liked it

"The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won’t get much sleep."
— Woody Allen

10 people liked it

""If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative.""
— Woody Allen

1 person liked it

"I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse."
— Woody Allen

tags: sex
31 people liked it

"In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!"
— Woody Allen

62 people liked it

"I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university."
— Albert Einstein

tags: life, respect
1,395 people liked it

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
— Douglas Adams (The Restaurant at the End of the Universe)

tags: humor
1,322 people liked it

"If you can't explain it to a six year old, you don't understand it yourself."
— Albert Einstein

1,787 people liked it

"It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter."
— Marlene Dietrich

tags: friend, friendship
1,556 people liked it

"Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination."
— Oscar Wilde

tags: imagination, life, money
1,203 people liked it

"Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.'"
— John Greenleaf Whittier (Maud Muller - Pamphlet)

tags: life, words
1,209 people liked it

"If there's a book that you want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it."
— Toni Morrison

tags: books, writing
1,100 people liked it

"Societies in decline have no use for visionaries."
— Anaïs Nin

tags: civilization, inspiration, revolution
60 people liked it

"Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness.
Listen to it carefully."
— Richard Bach (Illusions)

tags: conscience, encouragement, inspiration, life, morality, selfishness, wisdom
13 people liked it

"If you will practice being fictional for a while, you will understand
that fictional characters are sometime more real than people with bodies and
heartbeats."
— Richard Bach (Illusions)

tags: fiction, inspiration, values
6 people liked it

"The individual who says it is not possible should move out of the way of those doing it."
— Tricia Cunningham

tags: diet, fitness, health, inspiration, motivation
17 people liked it

"The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them. "
— Albert Einstein

tags: inspiration, problem-solving
13 people liked it

"There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its
hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts."
— Richard Bach (Illusions)

tags: inspiration
8 people liked it

"Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible."
— Frank Zappa

tags: music, philosophy, progress
477 people liked it

"Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric."
— Bertrand Russell

tags: confidence, eccentricity, philosophy
551 people liked it

"A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."
— Albert Einstein

tags: compassion, einstein, nature, philosophy
516 people liked it

"The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."
— Plato

tags: philosophy
306 people liked it

"I sincerely believe that banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies, and that the principle of spending money to be paid by posterity, under the name of funding, is but swindling futurity on a large scale."
— Thomas Jefferson

tags: banks, destruction, federal, financial, loans, money, philosophy, political, politics, power, science, society, violence, war
130 people liked it

"Death speaks: There was a merchant in Bagdad who sent his servant to market to buy provisions and in a little while the servant came back, white and trembling and said, Master, just now when I was in the market-place I was jostled by a woman in the crowd and when I turned I saw it was Death that jostled me. She looked at me and made a threatening gesture; now, lend me your horse, and I will ride away from this city and avoid my fate. I will go to Samarra and there Death will not find me. The merchant lent him his hore, and the servant mounted it, and he dug his spurs in its flanks and as fast as the horse could gallop he went. Then the merchant went down to the market-place and he saw me standing in the crowd and he came to me and said, Why did you make a threatening gesture to my servant when you saw him this morning? That was not a threatening gesture, I said, it was only a start of surprise. I was astonished to see him in Bagdad, for I had an appointment with him tonight in Samarra."
— W. Somerset Maugham

tags: death, humor
1 person liked it

"A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool."
— William Shakespeare (As You Like It)

tags: wisdom
6,178 people liked it

"Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people."
— Eleanor Roosevelt

tags: dreams
3,465 people liked it

"You dont love someone because they're perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they're not"
— Jodi Picoult (My Sister's Keeper)

875 people liked it

"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose."
— Garrison Keillor

tags: absurd, cats, humor
532 people liked it

"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious."
— Albert Einstein

696 people liked it

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'."
— Groucho Marx

tags: friends, humor, jail
712 people liked it

"In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act."
— George Orwell

tags: truth
540 people liked it

"If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything."
— Marilyn Monroe

tags: girls, love
800 people liked it

"The major problem- one of the major problems, for there are several- one of the many major problems with governing people is that of whom you get to do it; or rather of whom manages to get people to let them do it to them.
To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it.
To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job."
— Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

tags: elections, hg2g, politics, president, rulers
494 people liked it

"Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live."
— Mark Twain

tags: illusions, life
582 people liked it

"There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life."
— John Lennon

tags: beatles, fear, life, love
571 people liked it

"The problem with designing something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of a complete fool. "
— Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

525 people liked it

"Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one."
— Terry Pratchett

tags: fantasy, humor, imagination, literature, stories
553 people liked it

"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself."
— Robert Frost

661 people liked it

"Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man ... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you. He loves you and he needs money."
— George Carlin

tags: atheism, humor, life, religion
533 people liked it

"Everything must be made as simple as possible. But not simpler."
— Albert Einstein

tags: einstein, science, systems
496 people liked it

"If you are going through hell, keep going."
— Winston S. Churchill

tags: hell, perseverance
562 people liked it

"If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?"
— Jerry Seinfeld

tags: books, funny
533 people liked it

"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is to not stop questioning."
— Albert Einstein (Relativity: The Special and the General Theory)

tags: physics, science
566 people liked it

"Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power."
— Oscar Wilde

tags: power, sex
523 people liked it

"A house without books is like a room without windows."
— Horace Mann

tags: books, house, windows
538 people liked it

"You can only be young once. But you can always be immature"
— Dave Barry

tags: humor
506 people liked it

"Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy."
— Albert Einstein

tags: funny
589 people liked it

"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
— Groucho Marx

tags: humor, life
450 people liked it

"If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed."
— Mark Twain

tags: newspapers
494 people liked it

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