Jodi's quotes

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"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
— Robert A. Heinlein

tags: cats, humor, women
3,941 people liked it

"You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children."
— Madeleine L'Engle

tags: books, children, difficult, grown-ups, write, writers, writing
3,115 people liked it

"I have always imagined that Paradise will be some kind of library."
— Jorge Luis Borges

tags: books, library
3,258 people liked it

"For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness."
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

3,532 people liked it

"If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals."
— J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire)

tags: integrity
3,993 people liked it

"Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people."
— Eleanor Roosevelt

tags: dreams
3,799 people liked it

"You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body."
— C.S. Lewis

tags: body, soul
3,618 people liked it

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go..."
— Dr. Seuss

tags: inspirational
3,070 people liked it

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."
— Margaret Mead

tags: activism, change, inspirational, life, philosophy, world
2,157 people liked it

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you."
— Rita Mae Brown

tags: humor, insanity
2,595 people liked it

"People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be."
— Abraham Lincoln

tags: happiness
2,816 people liked it

"Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life."
— Terry Pratchett (Jingo)

tags: humor, proverb
2,070 people liked it

"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

tags: friends
2,336 people liked it

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."
— Albert Einstein

tags: reality
2,187 people liked it

"A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes."
— Mark Twain

tags: truth
2,293 people liked it

"A day without laughter is a day wasted."
— Charlie Chaplin

tags: philosophy
2,438 people liked it

"The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go."
— Dr. Seuss

tags: learning, reading, seuss
2,156 people liked it

"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone."
— Bill Cosby

tags: failure, inspirational, success
2,423 people liked it

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you."
— A.A. Milne (Winnie-the-Pooh)

tags: friendship
2,494 people liked it

"There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed."
— Ernest Hemingway

tags: good, writing
1,965 people liked it

"If you're looking for sympathy you'll find it between shit and syphilis in the dictionary."
— David Sedaris (Barrel Fever: Stories and Essays)

tags: sympathy
1,782 people liked it

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us."
— Helen Keller

tags: inspirational
2,322 people liked it

"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
— Chuck Palahniuk

tags: god, life
1,619 people liked it

"Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life."
— Confucius

2,213 people liked it

"An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind."
— Mahatma Gandhi (GANDHI: An Autobiography or The Story of My Experiments with Truth)

tags: conflict, fighting, peace, revenge, trial, violence
1,883 people liked it

"The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me."
— Ayn Rand

1,980 people liked it

"One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain."
— Bob Marley

tags: music
2,251 people liked it

"If I had a flower for every time I thought of you...I could walk through my garden forever."
— Alfred Lord Tennyson

tags: friendship, love
1,859 people liked it

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song."
— Maya Angelou

tags: inspirational, writing
1,768 people liked it

"Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
— Mark Twain

tags: humor, politics
1,567 people liked it

"I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much."
— Mother Teresa

tags: catholicism, christianity, god, inspirational, religion
1,950 people liked it

"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom."
— Aristotle

tags: wisdom
1,724 people liked it

"Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You."
— Dr. Seuss (Happy Birthday to You!)

tags: comedy, life, yourself
1,766 people liked it

"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right."
— Henry Ford

tags: thinking
1,404 people liked it

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
— Douglas Adams (The Restaurant at the End of the Universe)

tags: humor
1,392 people liked it

"Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana."
— Groucho Marx

tags: humor, time
1,548 people liked it

"There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate."
— Charles Dickens

tags: chocolate, friendship
2,098 people liked it

"I cannot live without books."
— Thomas Jefferson

tags: books
1,405 people liked it

"Being a woman is a terribly difficult task, since it consists principally in dealing with men."
— Joseph Conrad

tags: women
1,275 people liked it

"A study in the Washington Post says that women have
better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the
authors of that study: 'Duh.'"
— Conan O'Brien

tags: humor, men, women
146 people liked it

"Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80%of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!"
— Andy Rooney

tags: age, cows, marriage, men, pigs, sausage, women
136 people liked it

"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it. "
— Roseanne Barr

tags: feminism, power, women
129 people liked it

"The most beautiful makeup of a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy."
— Yves Saint-Laurent

tags: cosmetics, fashion, makeup, women
84 people liked it

"[T]he best thing a girl can be is a good wife and mother. It is a girl's highest calling. I hope I am ready."
— Nancy E. Turner (These Is My Words: The Diary of Sarah Agnes Prine, 1881-1901 : A Novel)

tags: marriage, motherhood, wife, women
40 people liked it

"Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like."
— Lemony Snicket

tags: fate, humor
1,089 people liked it

"I love you like a fat kid loves cake!"
— Scott Adams

tags: food, humor, love
997 people liked it

"When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, There's just something about you that pisses me off."
— Stephen King (Storm of the Century: An Original Screenplay)

tags: god, humor, religion
912 people liked it

"Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before."
— Steven Wright

tags: amnesia, humor, memory
775 people liked it

"My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best."
— Winston S. Churchill

tags: humor, taste
757 people liked it

"From there to here, from here to there, funny things are everywhere!"
— Dr. Seuss

tags: humor
562 people liked it

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