Alexander's quotes

(showing 1-50 of 60)

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
— Albert Einstein

tags: einstein, human, humor, infinity, nature, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
11,733 people liked it

"Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."
— Albert Einstein

tags: humor, insanity, life
9,301 people liked it

"So many books, so little time."
— Frank Zappa

tags: books, humor
9,162 people liked it

"You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough"
— Mae West

tags: humor, life
8,613 people liked it

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."
— Groucho Marx (The Essential Groucho)

tags: animals, books, dogs, friends, humor
6,523 people liked it

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
— John Lennon

tags: beatles, fate, life, planning, plans
6,679 people liked it

"If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything."
— Malcolm X

tags: belief, integrity
6,394 people liked it

"To you, I'm an atheist.
To God, I'm the loyal opposition."
— Woody Allen

tags: absurd, atheism, humor
364 people liked it

"Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man ... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you. He loves you and he needs money."
— George Carlin

tags: atheism, humor, life, religion
533 people liked it

"All thinking men are atheists."
— Ernest Hemingway (A Farewell to Arms)

tags: atheism, inspirational
113 people liked it

"Agnostics are just atheists without balls."
— Stephen Colbert (I Am America: And So Can You!)

tags: atheism
74 people liked it

"Atheism is a non-prophet organization."
— George Carlin

tags: atheism
89 people liked it

"Looked into the sky, heavy with smoke and human fat, and God was not there. The cold, suffocating dark goes on forever, and we are alone. It is not God that kills the children, not fate the butchers them, nor destiny that feeds them to the dogs. It's us. Only us."
— Alan Moore (Watchmen)

tags: atheism, war
78 people liked it

"Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet. Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich."
— Napoleon Bonaparte

tags: atheism, religion
54 people liked it

"Humor is reason gone mad."
— Groucho Marx

tags: humor, reason
651 people liked it

"I sent the club a wire stating, "PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER"."
— Groucho Marx (Groucho and Me)

tags: clique, clubs, humor, membership
405 people liked it

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'."
— Groucho Marx

tags: friends, humor, jail
713 people liked it

"Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere."
— Groucho Marx

tags: marriage, romance, sex
61 people liked it

"Every generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it."
— George Orwell

tags: generations, intelligence, wisdom
77 people liked it

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception."
— Groucho Marx

331 people liked it

"Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, and I'm going to be happy in it."
— Groucho Marx

157 people liked it

"I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox."
— Woody Allen

51 people liked it

" It's just like when you've got some coffee that's too black, which means it's too strong. What do you do? You integrate it with cream, you make it weak. But if you pour too much cream in it, you won't even know you ever had coffee. It used to be hot, it becomes cool. It used to be strong, it becomes weak. It used to wake you up, now it puts you to sleep. "
— Malcolm X

17 people liked it

"Can you still have any famous last words if you're somebody nobody knows?"
— Ryan Adams

2 people liked it

"slept all night in the cedar grove,
i was born to ramble, born to rove,
some men are searchin' for the holy grail,
but there ain't nothin' sweeter
than ridin' the rails"
— Tom Waits

4 people liked it

"There ain't no devil, only God when he's drunk."
— Tom Waits

tags: ironic, music, tom, waits
53 people liked it

"A cult is a religion with no political power."
— Tom Wolfe

tags: atheism, philosophy
59 people liked it

"Belief is the death of intelligence."
— Robert Anton Wilson

tags: atheism, belief, faith, intelligence, metaphysics, philosophy, religion
82 people liked it

"Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason"
— Jarry Seinfeld

2 people liked it

"I have great faith in fools - my friends call it self-confidence."
— Edgar Allan Poe

tags: faith, fool, humor, self-confidence, self-irony
344 people liked it

"If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered."
— Edgar Allan Poe

tags: forget, memory
69 people liked it

"Science has not yet taught us if madness is or is not the sublimity of the intelligence."
— Edgar Allan Poe

48 people liked it

"The true genius shudders at incompleteness - and usually prefers silence to saying something which is not everything it should be."
— Edgar Allan Poe

32 people liked it

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
— Dr. Seuss

tags: be-yourself, confidence, individuality, those-who-matter
17,741 people liked it

"Be the change that you wish to see in the world."
— Mahatma Gandhi

tags: action, change, inspirational, philosophy, wish
11,259 people liked it

"A room without books is like a body without a soul."
— Marcus Tullius Cicero

tags: books, soul
10,875 people liked it

"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."
— Dr. Seuss

tags: dreams, love, reality, sleep
10,097 people liked it

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference."
— Elie Wiesel

tags: activism, apathy, hate, indifference, love, opposite, philosophy
7,002 people liked it

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on."
— Robert Frost

tags: life
6,920 people liked it

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."
— Steve Martin

tags: humor, obvious
5,281 people liked it

"Without music, life would be a mistake."
— Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

tags: inspirational, music, philosophy
5,461 people liked it

"Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much."
— Oscar Wilde

tags: enemies, forgiveness, strategy
5,941 people liked it

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
— Oscar Wilde (Lady Windermere's Fan)

tags: inspirational, optimism, perception, pessimism
4,891 people liked it

"A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned to walk forward."
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

tags: conservatives
12 people liked it

"Men are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds."
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

9 people liked it

""I love it--I just love it.""
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

tags: humor, laughter, president
3 people liked it

"Books can not be killed by fire. People die, but books never die. No man and no force can abolish memory... In this war, we know, books are weapons. And it is a part of your dedication always to make them weapons for man's freedom."
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

tags: books, censorship, freedom
40 people liked it

"Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth."
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

4 people liked it

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.

"
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

3 people liked it

"i've forgotten more than you'll ever know"
— Bob Dylan

15 people liked it

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