"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
— Douglas Adams

"A witty saying proves nothing. "
— Voltaire

"I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: Oh Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And God granted it."
— Voltaire

"God is a comedian playing to an audience that is too afraid to laugh."
— Voltaire

"When most people said "I'm psychic, you see," they meant "I have an overactive but unoriginal imagination/wear black nail varnish/ talk to my budgie"; when Anathema said it, it sounded as though she was admitting to a hereditary disease which she'd much prefer not to have."
— Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett