Loren's quotes

(showing 1-50 of 907)

"I've been accused of vulgarity. I say that's bullshit."
— Mel Brooks

tags: bullshit, humor, profanity, shit, vulgarity
77 people liked it

"The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid."
— Jane Austen (Northanger Abbey)

tags: books, classic, humor
5,495 people liked it

"The most perfidious way of harming a cause consists of defending it deliberately with faulty arguments."
— Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

tags: perception, philosophy, scientific-process, truth
48 people liked it

"Perhaps when we find ourselves wanting everything, it is because we are dangerously close to wanting nothing."
— Sylvia Plath

tags: goals
166 people liked it

"Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings."
— Anaïs Nin

tags: death, love
2,202 people liked it

"Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I'll have a witty and blistering retort! You'll be devastated THEN"
— Bill Watterson

60 people liked it

"do it from the heart or not at all."
— Jeanette Winterson (The Passion)

21 people liked it

"He can run faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo."
— J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)

tags: humor, shampoo
388 people liked it

"Just like an angry kitten that believes it’s a tiger."
— Stephenie Meyer (Midnight Sun)

tags: humor, philosophy
90 people liked it

"A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything."
— Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

tags: faith
145 people liked it

"The first two facts which a healthy boy or girl feels about sex are these: first that it is beautiful and then that it is dangerous."
— G.K. Chesterton

tags: sex
19 people liked it

"Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?'
Frank Zappa: 'You have a wooden leg. Does that make you a table?'"
— Frank Zappa

tags: hair, humor
46 people liked it

"I wish I knew how to quit you."
— Annie Proulx (Brokeback Mountain)

tags: love, true
12 people liked it

"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it!"
— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

tags: inspirational
342 people liked it

"Fate gives all of us three teachers, three friends, three enemies, and three great loves in our lives. But these twelve are always disguised, and we can never know which one is which until we’ve loved them, left them, or fought them."
— Gregory David Roberts (Shantaram)

tags: bombay, india, mumbai, shantaram
14 people liked it

""There are things that I canna tell you, at least not yet. And I'll ask nothing of ye that ye canna give me. But what I would ask of ye---when you do tell me something, let it be the truth. And I'll promise ye the same. We have nothing now between us, save---respect, perhaps. And I think that respect has maybe room for secrets, but not for lies. Do ye agree?" "
— Diana Gabaldon (Outlander)

14 people liked it

"A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment."
— Jane Austen

tags: humor, love, romantic, women
1,532 people liked it

"There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature."
— Jane Austen (Northanger Abbey)

tags: friendship, love
1,559 people liked it

"You realize that our mistrust of the future makes it hard to give up the past."
— Chuck Palahniuk (Survivor)

tags: future, life, past
367 people liked it

"When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick."
— George Burns

tags: age, humor
62 people liked it

"To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love"
— Jane Austen (Pride and Prejudice)

69 people liked it

"She behaves as if she was beautiful. Most American women do. It is the secret of their charm."
— Oscar Wilde

53 people liked it

"I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension."
— Steven Wright

tags: humor, sci-fi, sf
33 people liked it

"The power of a glance has been so much abused in love stories, that it has come to be disbelieved in. Few people dare now to say that two beings have fallen in love because they have looked at each other. Yet it is in this way that love begins, and in this way only."
— Victor Hugo (Les Misérables)

tags: attraction, love
155 people liked it

"When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, the other opportunity."
— John F. Kennedy

tags: chinese, crisis, danger, inspirational, opportunity
424 people liked it

"I hope she'll be a fool -- that's the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool."
— F. Scott Fitzgerald (The Great Gatsby)

tags: inspirational, women
189 people liked it

"Christian Fundamentalism: The doctrine that there is an absolutely powerful, infinitely knowledgeable, universe-spanning entity that is deeply and personally concerned about my sex life. "
— Andrew Lias

tags: atheism, atheist, religion
17 people liked it

"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife."
— Jane Austen (Pride and Prejudice)

tags: husband, marriage, wife
844 people liked it

"You must know... surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I'd scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on."
— Jane Austen (Pride and Prejudice)

tags: mr-darcy-to-elizabeth-bennett
500 people liked it

"Perhaps if we saw what was ahead of us, and glimpsed the follies, and misfortunes that would befall us later on, we would all stay in our mother's wombs, and then there would be nobody in the world but a great number of very fat, very irritated women."
— Lemony Snicket

tags: follies, misfortunes, women
167 people liked it

"Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about."
— Oscar Wilde (The Picture of Dorian Gray)

tags: life, surrealistic
397 people liked it

"We'll never be as young as we are tonight."
— Chuck Palahniuk (Rant: An Oral Biography of Buster Casey)

tags: age, youth
118 people liked it

"It is very unnerving to be proven wrong, particularly when you are really right and the person who is really wrong is proving you wrong and proving himself, wrongly, right."
— Lemony Snicket (The Blank Book)

tags: wrong
127 people liked it

""So this is it. We're going to die."
"Yes...except...No! Wait a minute, what's this switch?"
"What? Where?"
"No, I was only fooling. We are going to die after all." "
— Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

tags: humor, science
128 people liked it

"She was wearing a pair of my pajamas with the sleeves rolled up. When she laughed I wanted her again. A minute later she asked me if I loved her. I told her it didn't mean anything but that I didn't think so. She looked sad. But as we were fixing lunch, and for no apparent reason, she laughed in such a way that I kissed her."
— Albert Camus

30 people liked it

"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."
— Eleanor Roosevelt

tags: confidence, inspirational, wisdom
10,315 people liked it

"The unreal is more powerful than the real. Because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it. Because its only intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. Stone crumbles. Wood rots. People, well, they die. But things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on. If you can change the way people think. The way they see themselves. The way they see the world. You can change the way people live their lives. That's the only lasting thing you can create."
— Chuck Palahniuk (Choke)

263 people liked it

"I'm gonna kill him," Eve said, or at least that was what it sounded like filtered through the pillow.
"Stake him right in the heart, shove garlic up his ass, and-and-"

"And what?" (Michael)

"When did you get home?" Claire demanded.

"Apparently just in time to hear my funeral plans. I especially like the garlic up the ass. It's...different.""
— Rachel Caine (Feast of Fools)

tags: death, humor, vampires
68 people liked it

"If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger."
— Emily Brontë (Wuthering Heights)

115 people liked it

"Ok. You fuck me, then snub me. You love me, you hate me. You show me a sensitive side, then you turn into a total asshole. Is this a pretty accurate description of our relationship."
— Chuck Palahniuk (Fight Club: A Novel)

tags: love
90 people liked it

"Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary."
— Mark Twain

tags: inspirational
157 people liked it

"There are two kinds of women: those who marry princes and those who marry frogs. The frogs never become princes, but it is an acknowledged fact that a prince may very well, in the course of an ordinary marrige, gradually, at first almost imperceptibly, turn into a frog. Happy the woman who after twenty-five years still wakes up beside the prince she fell in love with."
— Stephen Mitchell (The Frog Prince: A Fairy Tale for Consenting Adults)

tags: love
18 people liked it

"Oh lovers! be careful in those dangerous first days! once you've brought breakfast in bed you'll have to bring it forever, unless you want to be accused of lovelessness and betrayal."
— Milan Kundera (The Book of Laughter and Forgetting)

tags: love
52 people liked it

"There are few people whom I really love, and still fewer of whom I think well. The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every day confirms my belief of the inconsistency of all human characters, and of the little dependence that can be placed on the appearance of merit or sense."
— Jane Austen

408 people liked it

"I'm learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework...procrastinating and negotiation."
— Bill Watterson

tags: calvin-and-hobbes, negotiation, procrastination
141 people liked it

"Kids chase the love that eludes them."
— Mitch Albom (For One More Day)

tags: love
21 people liked it

"Death is the mother of beauty. Only the perishable can be beautiful, which is why we are unmoved by artificial flowers."
— Wallace Stevens

tags: beauty
8 people liked it

"Almost every time somebody gives me a present, it ends up making me sad."
— J.D. Salinger

35 people liked it

"I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal."
— Jane Austen

tags: friends, humor, people
2,209 people liked it