Kayleigh's quotes

(showing 1-50 of 90)

"Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be."
— Mark Twain

tags: humor, writing
1,535 people liked it

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
— Dr. Seuss

tags: be-yourself, confidence, individuality, those-who-matter
17,961 people liked it

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
— Albert Einstein

tags: einstein, human, humor, infinity, nature, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
11,887 people liked it

"A room without books is like a body without a soul."
— Marcus Tullius Cicero

tags: books, soul
11,009 people liked it

"When I was a child, adults would tell me not to make things up, warning me of what would happen if I did. As far as I can tell so far, it seems to involve lots of foreign travel and not having to get up too early in the morning."
— Neil Gaiman (Smoke and Mirrors: Short Fictions and Illusions)

769 people liked it

"Reality leaves a lot to the imagination."
— John Lennon

tags: beatles, imagination, reality
169 people liked it

"Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most."
— Mark Twain

66 people liked it

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you."
— Rita Mae Brown

tags: humor, insanity
2,452 people liked it

"Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like."
— Lemony Snicket

tags: fate, humor
1,036 people liked it

"Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed."
— Albert Einstein

53 people liked it

"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."
— Edgar Allan Poe

tags: insanity, sanity
797 people liked it

"Violence is never the answer but sometimes, like with cockroaches, it is the only possible response."
— Tanya Huff

11 people liked it

""Cats are connoisseurs of comfort.""
— James Herriot

13 people liked it

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
— Oscar Wilde (Lady Windermere's Fan)

tags: inspirational, optimism, perception, pessimism
4,966 people liked it

"If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything."
— Malcolm X

tags: belief, integrity
6,479 people liked it

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
— John Lennon

tags: beatles, fate, life, planning, plans
6,801 people liked it

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
— Dr. Seuss

tags: cry, crying, experience, happiness, joy, life, optimism, sadness, smile, smiling
14,538 people liked it

"Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
— Mark Twain

tags: dance, heaven, hurt, inspirational, life, love, sing
15,860 people liked it

"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it."
— André Gide

tags: truth
98 people liked it

"Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian."
— Robert Orben

tags: humour, politics, truth
335 people liked it

"There's no facet, no aspect, no moment of life that can't be improved with pizza."
— Daria Morgendorffer

tags: food, friendship, pizza
6 people liked it

"This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness"
— Dalai Lama

25 people liked it

"It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious."
— Oscar Wilde (Lady Windermere's Fan)

tags: bad, charming, good, tedious
336 people liked it

"The truth is not always beautiful, nor beautiful words the truth."
— Laozi (Tao Te Ching)

tags: beauty, truth
106 people liked it

"(Asked what he thought of Western civilization) 'I think it would be a good idea.'"
— Mahatma Gandhi

tags: civilization, eastern, philosophy, society, western
77 people liked it

"You're not to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who does it or says it."
— Malcolm X (By Any Means Necessary)

tags: philosophy, politics
429 people liked it

"A nation that continues year after year to spend more money on military defense than on programs of social uplift is approaching spiritual doom."
— Martin Luther King Jr.

tags: change, military, social, war
40 people liked it

"How come we play war and not peace?"
"Too few role models."
— Bill Watterson

tags: peace, war
72 people liked it

"When the rich wage war it's the poor who die."
— Jean-Paul Sartre

tags: war
87 people liked it

"CALVIN:
Isn't it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor?

When you think about it, it's weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity. We laugh at nonsense. We like it. We think it's funny.

Don't you think it's odd that we appreciate absurdity? Why would we develop that way? How does it benefit us?

HOBBES:
I suppose if we couldn't laugh at the things that don't make sense, we couldn't react to a lot of life."
— Bill Watterson

tags: humor, life
225 people liked it

"People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world."
— Bill Watterson (The Calvin and Hobbes Tenth Anniversary Book)

tags: humor, idiots, life
642 people liked it

"You know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change, but pretty soon...everything's different."
— Bill Watterson

tags: change, life
218 people liked it

"I love mankind, it's people I can't stand."
— Charles M. Schulz

tags: humor, mankind, people
3,138 people liked it

"Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment."
— Rita Mae Brown (Alma Mater)

tags: bad-judgement, experience, good-judgement, judgment, mistakes
86 people liked it

"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
— Douglas Adams

tags: deadlines, humor, work
5,284 people liked it

"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."
— Douglas Adams (The Restaurant at the End of the Universe)

tags: humor, scifi
3,254 people liked it

"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."
— Groucho Marx

tags: books, humor, reading, television
2,818 people liked it

"I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal."
— Jane Austen

tags: friends, humor, people
2,203 people liked it

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."
— Groucho Marx (The Essential Groucho)

tags: animals, books, dogs, friends, humor
6,580 people liked it

"Humor is reason gone mad."
— Groucho Marx

tags: humor, reason
656 people liked it

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'."
— Groucho Marx

tags: friends, humor, jail
727 people liked it

"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies."
— Groucho Marx

196 people liked it

"Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, and I'm going to be happy in it."
— Groucho Marx

158 people liked it

"Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light. "
— Groucho Marx

99 people liked it

"Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms."
— Groucho Marx

tags: government, intelligence
18 people liked it

"“Marriage is a wonderful institution...but who wants to live in an institution?”"
— Groucho Marx

21 people liked it

"I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there."
— Oscar Wilde

tags: heaven, humor
872 people liked it

"Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.
"
— Napoleon Bonaparte

6 people liked it

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect."
— Mark Twain

tags: individuality, majority, minority, pause, reflect, wisdom
6,111 people liked it

"You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children."
— Madeleine L'Engle

tags: books, children, difficult, grown-ups, write, writers, writing
3,010 people liked it

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