Tom Foolery Tom's Comments (member since Jul 30, 2008)


Tom's comments from the The Haters Club group.

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_ (6 new)
23 hours, 5 min ago

2766 Ah. Climate change. I think there can be little doubt we're changing the climate. To what degree, should we do anything about it, is it a bad thing.... Are all questions I don't especially care about. I ain't having kids, let other peoples crotchfruit worry about it.
2766 Have an attorney general, that is. Not a useless, grandstanding assbag. Though they probably have those as well.
2766 Most states do, in fact.
2766 Yes. He's a useless, grandstanding assbag with higher political ambitions, but yes.
2766 I may be overreacting. I need some perspective.

In January i had some old checks stolen, from two different accounts. Carelessness on my part, i admit. The thieves went on a tear, ran up hundreds of dollars in bad checks in the 5 days before i caught it and was able to do anything. I was honestly more irritated at the retailers that took the checks without my ID than the thieves-- i worked in retail for many years and am (or was) pretty familiar with reasonable check acceptance procedures. Anyway. Arrests were made, forms were filed, affidavits were attested to. (These people "aren't that bright," according to the detective). Everything over but the sentencing, or so i thought.

Today i get a call. A collections call. From an agency representing the grocery store where these fuckers passed something like 5 bad checks. Where the check acceptance procedure is, apparently, "yes." I'm so mad i could spit. Fucking grocery store- the chain that i do did all my shopping at- enables these people who signed my name but with THEIR FUCKING ID on these checks. The detective even went over the video with the store manager and saw the point where a keyholder did register override to accept the check. These transactions raised more red flags than France raised white ones. But. When my bank stops the checks AS A FRAUD STOP do they look at their internal procedures? Do they go after the fuckwits who gave their OWN SCDL NUMBERS WHEN WRITING A BAD CHECK? Do they talk to the detective WHO HAS ALREADY BEEN IN CONTACT WITH THE FUCKING STORE MANAGER? FUCK NO! THEY SEND ME to FUCKING COLLECTIONS! But it's OK! No, REALLY! All i have to do is send them a copy of the police report, and they'll STOP FUCKING CALLING ME FOR MONEY TO PAY FOR THE FUCKING FUCK UP THESE FUCKING FUCKERS FUCKING MADE IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE.

Sorry. I'm calm now. I just want to put my foot so far up someone's ass they can taste the Kiwi. But i'm good, really.

My initial inclination was to obtain contact information for every person i can at their corporate headquarters, and rip them all a new one as i explain how they've lost a 15 year customer. But now i've reconsidered. I'm thinking now that i should write a polite, concise letter explaining how they've lost a 15 year customer and send it to their customer service email. And send a copy to the Better Business Bureau. And the Office of the Comptroller of the Currency(since they regulate check processing). And the Attorney General of South Carolina. And every single consumer blog and local radio, tv, and print news outlet i can find an email address for. Then file a small claims court claim for damages for negligence, harassment, and intimidation (since they're hassling me for money that they have every reason to know i don't owe them). Best case they don't show and i win damages in a default judgment, worst case i pay a few bucks for the filing fee, but they have to shell out and pay a company shark to take the time to show up and defend their (indefensible) asses.

So. Am i overreacting? I'm not out any money. All i have to do is send THE GODDAMNED MOTHER FUCKERS THE POLICE REPORT THAT THEY SHOULD HAVE ALREADY SINCE THEIR OWN FUCKWIT MANAGER OF SEMI-TRAINED STAFF HAS ALREADY BEEN IN TOUCH WITH THE GODDAMNED DETECTIVE IN CHARGE OF THE CASE and they'll stop calling me and let it go. Whatcha think?
2766 He could subsist for days on nothing but Doritos and Mountain Dew and go up to 12 hours without a bathroom break.
Apr 18, 2014 07:29AM

2766 So he only eats tuna, that he overpays for, in the can.
_ (6 new)
Apr 18, 2014 07:26AM

2766 I'm lazy. Summarize for me.
2766 We've already established he likes "baseball."
Apr 17, 2014 10:29AM

2766 Does it count as driving, if it's a scooter?
Apr 16, 2014 05:24AM

2766 Sorry, I neglected to say fast. Loud, fast and with screaming.
Hey, you dorks! (18 new)
Apr 15, 2014 04:12PM

2766 Bunny wrote: "Bunny Wan Kenobi?"

There ya go.
Apr 15, 2014 04:12PM

2766 Down at the cube farm we're permitted to listen to music (on headphones) while we work. I need something to help keep my toes tapping at work. Preferably loud, with screaming. I started a Disturbed station on Pandora, and i've got some Pantera and Five Finger Death Punch, and Godsmack and Rob Zombie...which is fine, i guess. But it's also throwing in crap like Three Days Grace and Nickelback and Seether. Also, every third song is Metallica. I didn't used to hate Metallica, but i do now. Also. Skillet? Seriously? What the hell kind of name for a band is Skillet? I hear they're opening for Saucepan this weekend on the Kitchen Implements Tour. a
Hey, you dorks! (18 new)
Apr 15, 2014 03:53PM

2766 Just because i'm bored....

If THC was the Star Wars universe, who would be which character?

Clearly, i'm Darth Vader.

Fooze is Jar Jar binks.

Harry is Chewbacca.

Monkey is Han Solo.

Nick is Palpatine

Rusty is Darth Vader.

That's all i got.
Apr 14, 2014 08:59PM

2766 That homeless Jesus thing made quite the stir around here. Though not as big a stir as the mayor getting arrested.
Apr 09, 2014 11:53AM

2766 Most of that twenty bucks is for materials and shipping. Hardly any of that is for labor.
Apr 09, 2014 11:51AM

2766 Also, I assumed Peaches Geldof was a stripper so I had to look her up. Turns out she came of WAY better in the naming department than her siblings Pixie, Fifi Trixibelle, and Tiger Lily.
Apr 09, 2014 11:34AM

2766 What are you people, anti American communists or something? It costs Nike at least twenty bucks a pair to make and import those sneaks... They deserve to make a profit, right?
Apr 08, 2014 09:26AM

2766 And Fooze is sweet on him, but afraid to tell him.
2766 No, the next level is when they attract other Canada geese and you get goose shit all over the place.
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