Zero vi Britannia’s review of City of Bones (The Mortal Instruments, #1) > Likes and Comments

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message 1: by P. (new)

P. Why did you do this to yourself again, you say?

So you can write this review.

Oh, I wish I could LOVE it. You explained the problems with this shitty piece of nothing so well. You are amazing, my friend.


Zero vi Britannia Palice wrote: "Why did you do this to yourself again, you say?

So you can write this review.

Oh, I wish I could LOVE it. You explained the problems with this shitty piece of nothing so well. You are amazing, ..."


*wipes away tear*
Thank you. Now, I'm going to rip into City of Glass. And that one was my favorite.


message 3: by P. (new)

P. Haah, yes, please do! DO it!


The Literary Bystander Oh I am in love with this review! I could not stop laughing while reading it. Clearly you deserve something for this. I say, ALL THE AWARDS FOR THIS REVIEW! :D :D


Zero vi Britannia nxlee wrote: "Oh I am in love with this review! I could not stop laughing while reading it. Clearly you deserve something for this. I say, ALL THE AWARDS FOR THIS REVIEW! :D :D"

Thank you!
*Takes dramatic bow*


Zero vi Britannia Ebony wrote: "Great review. The only relationship I cared about in this series was Alec and Magnus - because that's interesting to me, conceptually. An unconfident teenager who falls in love with a seemingly ove..."

Thanks. I only cared about Alec, Magnus, and Simon. I would have cared about Isabelle if she didn't remind me of a bunch of girls I knew and hated.


message 7: by Helen (last edited Apr 02, 2012 05:19AM) (new)

Helen "5) Other Issues
1. Clary is said to be clumsy, yet when has she ever been clumsy."

The real issue is, why does this sound familiar?
(Which kinda brings a whole new perspective to that cover blurb...)

Great review! Not that it'll stop me from reading it eventually. (I'm some kind of closet intellectual masochist.) But borrowed only. No way am I paying money for this.


message 8: by John (new)

John Egbert ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Not only do I hate them because the heroine always falls in love with them, but they play into the stereotype of guys with tragic pasts. Not all guy with TP's are AH's. Like Yuki Sohma from Fruits Basket: nice, polite, would never treat Clary or Simon the way Jace does.

Just this. THIS. Why couldn't the Yuki become a huge trend in YA? But nooo...we have the Jace, Edward and Patch as the big cliche.


Spider the Doof Warrior I always thought the Clave was more like the Ministry of Magic. They were such ASSHOLES. UGH. I was rooting for the Downworlders they sucked so much with their magical racism.


Zero vi Britannia John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Not only do I hate them because the heroine always falls in love with them, but they play into the stereotype of guys with tragic pasts. ..."


Even Kyo was better than most of these YA heroes.


Zero vi Britannia John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Luckily I haven't rewritten it yet.


message 12: by John (new)

John Egbert Zero vi Britannia wrote: "John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Not only do I hate them because the heroine always falls in love with them, but they play into the stereotype of guys with..."


Kyo was at least a jerk with a heart of gold. These guys are jerks with hearts of....jerks.


message 13: by John (new)

John Egbert Zero vi Britannia wrote: "John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Luckily I haven't rewritten it yet."


Why would you do such a thing?!?!


Zero vi Britannia John wrote: "Zero vi Britannia wrote: "John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Luckily I haven't rewritten it yet."

Why would you do such a thing?!?!"


I had originally written this review before I had reread COB. Now a bunch of other issues have popped up that I didn't discuss.


Zero vi Britannia John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?."

If you're interested there's also a Halo review up.


message 16: by John (new)

John Egbert Zero vi Britannia wrote: "John wrote: "Zero vi Britannia wrote: "John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?

Luckily I haven't rewritten it yet."

Why would you do such a thing?!?!"

I had..."


lol! I should have expected that, considering this is COB we're talking about here.


message 17: by John (new)

John Egbert Zero vi Britannia wrote: "John wrote: "ASDFGHJKL; HOW HAVE I NOT READ THIS REVIEW BEFORE?! HOWWW?."

If you're interested there's also a Halo review up."


There is?! *le search*


message 18: by Jocelyn (new)

Jocelyn Interestingly, about 3), Clare has plagiarised Rowling's Harry Potter series. So, yeah, I don't think she has the brain capacity to actually create her own characters; she can only steal them from others.


message 19: by Jasmine (new)

Jasmine I love this review. Especially: "Make me care, Clare." And "I'm not saying that Cassandra Clare shouldn't write (although, having read CoFA, she really shouldn't). I'm just saying that her book sucks."

I had a problem with the very first chapter. It sucked. It was terrible, but I kept reading to make a list of all the bad similes and descriptions she used, and boy, are there a lot.


message 20: by Christina (new)

Christina Wilder Reading CoB is like losing your virginity to a 55-year-old hooker. At first, you enjoyed the experience, you paid your money, and then you go about your day. But then the shame kicks in and you regret the entire thing.

Beyond genius.


Zero vi Britannia Christina wrote: "Reading CoB is like losing your virginity to a 55-year-old hooker...
Beyond genius."

Thank you.


message 22: by Aprille (new)

Aprille Now I might actually struggle on with this book just so I can read your review.


Zero vi Britannia Aprille Legacy wrote: "Now I might actually struggle on with this book just so I can read your review."

Yay!


message 24: by Christina (new)

Christina Wilder I'm not looking forward to the inevitable fangirling over the movie, which is shooting now.

Tumblr will be almost inhabitable.


Zero vi Britannia Christina wrote: "I'm not looking forward to the inevitable fangirling over the movie, which is shooting now.

Tumblr will be almost inhabitable."


I had to do this after I saw Clare's tumblr page. It made me rage so much I had to stop reading Mockingjay to write the new review.


message 26: by Christina (new)

Christina Wilder I haven't seen Clare's Tumblr page.

I seriously am surprised no one has yelled at me for my review of CoB. That book has serious fans. But hey, it just wasn't for me (shrugs).

Oh, and your final words are a delight. :)


message 27: by Aprille (new)

Aprille Oh, I agree with everything you said. Clary was USELESS! She literally did nothing the whole thing! and Luke at the end calling her a warrior woman or something. I snorted and threw the book away. Pathetic.

I didn't like it at all. And the end was just weird. Star Wars anyone?


message 28: by Christina (new)

Christina Wilder Aprille Legacy wrote: "Oh, I agree with everything you said. Clary was USELESS! She literally did nothing the whole thing! and Luke at the end calling her a warrior woman or something. I snorted and threw the book away."

Yeah, I dissed on Clary pretty hard in my review. Arg.

And the end was just weird. Star Wars anyone?




message 29: by Frisk (new)

Frisk -breaks like button-


message 30: by Natalia (new)

Natalia wow negative much? Let me have a read of YOUR book


message 31: by Helen (new)

Helen I never got the whole "you aren't allowed criticise it if you can't do it better" argument.

If only writers were allowed to review books, the site would have 1% of users it has now, if that much.


Spider the Doof Warrior Well you'll be able to READ my books when I WRITE THEM! And I won't copy off of a bunch of other better stories either!


message 33: by Helen (new)

Helen I can't believe I managed to miss "liking" this review...unless the update is relatively new.

Love the opening quotes.

I don't blame the actors though. It pays bills and will give them more exposure than a cable TV show.


Zero vi Britannia Helen wrote: "I don't blame the actors though. It pays bills and will give them more exposure than a cable TV show."

I'm not mad at them...sort of.


Zero vi Britannia BTW, is it me or does the CoB movie trailer look like an HP movie trailer?


message 36: by Helen (new)

Helen Zero vi Britannia wrote: "BTW, is it me or does the CoB movie trailer look like an HP movie trailer?"

Yeah, it's in similar style.

Also, spoilery much? (To both. Seriously?)


message 37: by Bella (new)

Bella Grace I love you so much. Mwah, mwah, mwah!*

*creep factor should be dismissed


message 38: by Asma (new)

Asma i liked the book well enough, but i agree with A LOT of what was said here. plus this review is damn funneh!!


Zero vi Britannia Asma wrote: "i liked the book well enough, but i agree with A LOT of what was said here. plus this review is damn funneh!!"

Thank you


message 40: by Anushka (new)

Anushka OH FINALLY! Finally someone who hates this series as much as I do.


message 41: by [deleted user] (new)

Natalia wrote: "wow negative much? Let me have a read of YOUR book"

In the name of all the people who loved CoB, I apologize for this repugnant display of imbecility, shit for brains and poor debating skills.
Make that zero debating skills.
And tons of shit. Entire sewer pits worth of shit.
Good review.


Zero vi Britannia Genesis wrote: "Natalia wrote: "wow negative much? Let me have a read of YOUR book"

In the name of all the people who loved CoB, I apologize for this repugnant display of imbecility, shit for brains and poor deba..."


Thanks. I actually enjoy the series somewhat. It's just that the series contains too many things that bug me.


message 43: by Tiffany (new)

Tiffany Losco You review is funny. Well I tried reading the first book city of bones, and just couldn't get into it. I hated her writing style. But I did just watch the movie. I really liked the movie, so I guess now I am going to make myself read the rest of her books.


message 44: by Evaredabook (new)

Evaredabook In terms of the genetics, hair colour is controlled by multiple genes, so it's not as simple as brown being dominant to blonde etc. Dark haired individuals might have many alleles that act as contributors (they code for pigment production) but still have some alleles that don't code for pigment production (they would be pretty much masked), so technically they might still have light haired offspring if the kid inherits most of the non-contributors. but it wouldn't be that common.
And I totally agree with your review this book sucks massive balls.


Zero vi Britannia Evaredabook wrote: "In terms of the genetics, hair colour is controlled by multiple genes, so it's not as simple as brown being dominant to blonde etc. Dark haired individuals might have many alleles that act as contr..."

Thanks


message 46: by Evaredabook (new)

Evaredabook Helen wrote: "I never got the whole "you aren't allowed criticise it if you can't do it better" argument.

If only writers were allowed to review books, the site would have 1% of users it has now, if that much."


Amen, sister!


message 47: by [deleted user] (new)

Evaredabook wrote: "Helen wrote: "I never got the whole "you aren't allowed criticise it if you can't do it better" argument.

If only writers were allowed to review books, the site would have 1% of users it has now, if that much."

Amen, sister! "


+1
It's always amusing how some people factorise lack of arguments by turning them into zero arguments.
For some reason, that mathematical equation makes sense in their head.


message 48: by Carolyn (new)

Carolyn What's up with random descriptions of people (Asian couple, curvy black girl, blonde with an orange tank top)

Those are called token characters who aren't white.


message 49: by Lydiana (new)

Lydiana I hate the series so bad. I watched the movie and something about Clary rubs me the wrong way. I thought I would feel differently when I read the book but boy..I hate her more!!! Ugh..I love Alec and Magnus though ;)


Zero vi Britannia Gia wrote: "..I love Alec and Magnus..."

They are great...except in Lost Souls.


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