I love love love your detailed review of the book even if, as you know, I liked the ending.
And not only because I prefer sad endings.
I thought it was happy ending for everyone.

I have thought about it actually.
Why, despite me falling in love with Kabir (Amit to some degree as well) and not liking Haresh at all, I condoned Lata's decision to marry Haresh.
The way I saw it, she wasn't settling down with Haresh just to please her mother and society. As you noted, her mom had qualms about him as well. Lata chose Haresha as a marriage with him has more chances of surviving mainly because of the type of person he is (old fashioned like our fathers) and the expectations she has out of a marriage. They both have experienced the verb love and decided love should be action in the form of a marriage or elopement (as Lata requests Kabir to do at the beginning of the book). I got the feeling they might never 'fall in love' with each other but love each other.

Not that Kabir or Amit are not wonderful people who would be equally commited to makinga marriage work, but in the end it is Lata who is not a good match for them. She could not trust Kabir to act and Kabir needed someone who would. As she says, she couldn't give Amit what he needed from a Poet's wife. So it wouldn't have lasted and she didn't seem the type who wanted to risk divorce, esp when marriage was her way out of living with her mother.

Just my two cents :)

i liked your review and I also felt that your being angry with Lata is just.. but you know what I agree as well as disagree..

Lata knew what she was doing, but she didn't know what she was doing when she was with Kabir & Amit was too much of an intellectual for her. She was a simple girl and wanted a simple man.. if that explains it.. ultimately she did not sacrifice or give up anything.. cos we realise that she herself stopped talking to Kabir even when she could.. we don't know much about Mr Mehra from the book but whatever little snippets here or there but as a daugther we generally prefer someone like our fathers as our husbands.. being taken care of, protected, loved no matter what, mutual respect..

i just thought of sharing it with you.. my two cents tooooo

You know, it's interesting you should say that. I read the book back in 2003/2004, but I've been thinking about re-reading it again to see if I feel differently now that I'm *ahem* older, and uhm...wiser ;-) Thanks for the comment!

I just finished the book and despite some slogs, thought it wonderful and a classic favorite among my books. I came to Goodreads because I am so eager to discuss it now. I kept hoping Meenakshi would get some sort of comeuppance. Love all these reviews.

Yes exactly, I can relate to that feeling!! I remember floating around after I finished the book, unable to get the characters out of my head! As for Meenakshi, the sad thing is, I actually know a couple of people who're like her (in spirit, if not in actual actions) . I totally understand the seething need to put her in her place! Unfortunately, people like that usually breeze through life! :(

It was quite a different experience for me reading this book. It took me two months or so. I never wanted to skip over so much as a paragraph, but after a few pages I was drowning in words, images, unfamiliar names for people, flowers, trees, clothing, etc. It must be the way a child feels learning a language when things just wash over you. I found that with such a big book to hold that I would sit in a reading chair with good light - I'd get up an hour early in the mornings to read. It was like a total immersion class on India. The author could tie in music, religion, politics, poetry, festivals and people in such a miraculous way. I read that the author's father worked for a shoe company. I also read that he is working on another novel, "A Suitable Girl." You really couldn't make a single movie based on this book. It would have to be a series and cover several seasons. Many many thanks to my friend Dildar Gill Pisani who recommended this book!

I hadn't heard that he was writing A Suitable Girl. That's something to look forward to ! Do read his "Two Lives" - it's a wonderful memoir about his great-uncle and his German-Jewish aunt. Given that it was set pre-WWII, it's a wonderful insight into being Indian in the Western world back then.

I will read that - as soon as I rush through the next book due for our book club week after next. I have read "A Fine Balance" by Rohanton Mistry (rather I listened to it on tape while commuting) and was very moved and impressed. "A Suitable Girl" (according to Wikipedia) will be about Lata trying to find a match for her grandson! It would be wonderful if they made it into an ebook with a full glossary, word definitions and pictures. We were watching the Occupy Wall Street pictures on the news last night and I thought of Vikram Seth's masterful depiction of Pul Mela and later the riot set off when two religious ceremonies ran into each other.

This is my all time favorite book! I loved every second I spent with it. My favorite characters are Pran and Mrs. Rupa Mehra, though I really liked Amit, too. I liked the fact that Lata chose Haresh even though I thought Kabir was a wonderful person. I think the difference in religion - and lifestyle - would have hampered the happiness of Lata and Kabir both, and their children as well. Haresh "suits" Lata better, I think.

I just ordered a copy of the book and the companion book for friends we spent the weekend with. It makes me so pleased to share reviews of this book. It is almost as if these people are friends. About a year ago I took on a Facebook friend in India -- he had talked to me during a computer tech call! You might like the journalistic book out recently called "The Instant City" about Karachi. Author Steve Inskeep of NPR. I couldn't put it down and read it through - "Suitable Boy" helped put it in context.

G: You know, I think I'm starting to understand that. Definitely to re-read the book again though :)

Sylvia: Will have to check it out! Thanks for the suggestion. You might also want to check out "Kartography" by Kamila Shamsie. Cannot recommend that book enough :)

You know, Vikram Seths's mother, Leila Seth, in her autobiography On Balance says that the entire Chatterji clan (except Mr. Chatterji) was based on their own family. And really, Lata was too dumb to settle for Haresh. ( Leila says that Haresh is a portrait of her husband!)

I did not know that ! Will have to read this book! Thanks for letting me know about it.

Our library system does not have it yet. I will ask them to order it.