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34th out of 48 books
—
26 voters
I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Relationships And Romance
Countless teens today feel depressed or discouraged because they don't have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Many single Christians feel frustrated with culture's expectations and patterns of dating. Youth pastors and parents find themselves dealing with young adults who fall into sexual temptation or spend more energy on dating than on following God. I Kissed Dating Goodbye off...more
Paperback, 235 pages
Published
April 1997
by Multnomah Publishers
(first published May 1996)
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I actually kissed dating goodbye after I got married (except the infrequent times my wife and I can leave our kids at home and go out for a quick dinner). However, this book really is a challenge to teens and younger adults (college/young singles) to rethink their mindset of the 'dating' culture. Some will cringe in reading this ideology for the first time, but when contimplating how to protect your own holiness and the purity of others, it makes more sense. Accountability and NOT acting on feel...more
It's weird.
When I read this for the first and only time, I had just parted ways with a high school girlfriend. Our relationship had been the most intense I'd ever had, and while we were in it, we were both pretty positive that this was real and fervent love. She's now happily married to a great guy who isn't me, and I'm now happily married to an amazing woman who isn't her. I'm not proud of how it ended, but it needed to.
This book fell into the midst of that dynamic in my life, and it rocked me....more
When I read this for the first and only time, I had just parted ways with a high school girlfriend. Our relationship had been the most intense I'd ever had, and while we were in it, we were both pretty positive that this was real and fervent love. She's now happily married to a great guy who isn't me, and I'm now happily married to an amazing woman who isn't her. I'm not proud of how it ended, but it needed to.
This book fell into the midst of that dynamic in my life, and it rocked me....more
27 likes · like · see review
Sep 02, 2009
Brittany
rated it
4 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
Anyone struggling with singleness or troublesome relationships
I've been having a really hard time interpretting what the Word states about relationships, sex before marraige, and dating. I, as a christian, feel its necessary not only to abide by the law of God, but to understand to gift of pleasure and love and why it is a godly experience if patience allows me to wait until marraige. Joshua Harris is a great author, very straight-forward and easy to understand. I highly recommend all of his books!
“Tired of the game? Kiss dating goodbye.
Dating: Isn't there a better way?
I Kissed Dating Goodbye suggests there is. Reorder your romantic life in the light of God's Word and find more fulfillment than a date could ever give – a life of sincere love, true purity, and purposeful singleness.” That is the promise and the premise behind Joshua Harris' new book I Kissed Dating Goodbye.
Joshua Harris writes pretty well, and he makes several good points in this book. When he talks about God's view on...more
Dating: Isn't there a better way?
I Kissed Dating Goodbye suggests there is. Reorder your romantic life in the light of God's Word and find more fulfillment than a date could ever give – a life of sincere love, true purity, and purposeful singleness.” That is the promise and the premise behind Joshua Harris' new book I Kissed Dating Goodbye.
Joshua Harris writes pretty well, and he makes several good points in this book. When he talks about God's view on...more
7 likes · like · see review
In this book Joshua Harris tells you to, as the title suggests, to kiss dating goodbye, suggesting that here is a better way to approach romance than simple "dating" could ever provide.
He urges you to ask yourself "what is your motivation in relationships, pleasing yourself or serving others?", "do you give yourself away physically or emotionally in ways you will regret when married?", and "does your current relationship hinder you from serving God as a single person?".
This book does not say th...more
He urges you to ask yourself "what is your motivation in relationships, pleasing yourself or serving others?", "do you give yourself away physically or emotionally in ways you will regret when married?", and "does your current relationship hinder you from serving God as a single person?".
This book does not say th...more
6 likes · like · see review
I am a 17 year old christian teenage girl who has lived her relationship life according to this book and has no regrets. I have healthy friendships with a lot of guys but--amazingly enough--not a single boyfriend. And my life has been just fine for it. Actually, my life has been great. The whole point of the book is that there is a season for everything: a season for investing in friendships, and a season for dating/courting for the purpose of marriage. This has worked just fine for all the peop...more
23 likes · like · see review
The title of this book is different, which is why I picked it up in the first place. The book isn't so much about giving up dating as the title implies, it's more about not dating seriously until you are ready to get married, and to use the time gaining a strong relationships with good friends and especially with Heavenly Father. The author, Joshua Harris, really drives home the idea that singleness is not something to dread, but to realize it as a gift.
Jul 02, 2007
Meghan
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
someone who is looking for a christian approach to dating.
Shelves:
favorites
I love this book. This book was like the thing that got my whole courtship mindset thing going. Joshua Harris is truly an amazing man and writter and i repect him for writting this book. Both guy and girl sometime in teen to late 20's should read this book. It gives a good out look on the whole dating/courting idea. Bottom line is: READ IT!
This book was on the unpopular list, probably because people couldn't imagine life with restrictions on dating or whatever. I haven't read it in a while because my mom bought it and where she put it I don't know, but I love it, so there. I think everyone should read it and I think that the author was very brave to address such an issue.
Coming from a happily married woman, I found this to be a stupid composition that follows a typical Christian formula of twisting Scripture to suit the point the author wants to make. "Purposeful singleness"? Common sense, rather than blowing up your every state of being into assuring yourself of your godliness, will get you further in my opinion. Only made a splash because it was written by a young, attractive male who claimed to have quit dating for good. Don't listen to me, though, read it fo...more
Beginning to read I Kissed Dating Goodbye, I would never have thought it would help me grow in my walk with God, and even just teach me simple things about dating. Reading through it helped me gain a better perspective on dating and also, gave me a greater desire to serve God as a single person until He leads me to begin a relationship. From reading this I realized its very important to restrain yourself from being consumed with dating and even at times wanting to be in a relationship. I Kissed...more
1 like · like · see review
Feb 15, 2011
Laura
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
Everyone, esp. singles or people who are currently dating
Shelves:
books-i-own
Absolutely brilliant!!!!!!! You may think from the title that he's gonna go, "Don't date. It's a sin." But that is not what he's doing. He gives a way to have Christ-centered relationship, and helps us see that our single years should be a gift from God, instead of a time to be constantly seeking a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife. We can leave that in God's hands; right now, in our single years, we're to put our all into serving Him, when we can have undivided interests.
I know not everyone wi...more
I know not everyone wi...more
This book continues to be a great inspiration to me, and this is my second time reading it, the first being when I was newly christened a teenager. Joshua Harris has such a straightforward way of showing you why he believes Dating can lead people astray and how you can live above that lifestyle. Each chapter had me convinced that Joshua Harris was onto something golden, something that I wanted to be a part of, this whole non-dating revolution. And all this was years ago, when I first read and be...more
Jan 02, 2008
Darin
rated it
4 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
Tania
Shelves:
have-read
This book was amazing! For Christians who are truly serious about their relationship with God, this book provides inspiration and motivation to stop looking for love that fails, words that are sweet and void of meaning or truth. It speaks from the heart of a man who knows what he is talking about and although many will and have criticized this book, i believe if you read it with an open heart you will have to admit that his argument makes sense.
Truly, I am so into this book and his philisophy an...more
Truly, I am so into this book and his philisophy an...more
I read this book when I was a broken-hearted nineteen-year-old. At the time the idea of kissing dating goodbye and doing it in the name of God seemed like a grand idea. I think it was largely because I had no dates to kiss goodbye, so it gave me some noble reason to beyond the fact that girls didn't like me and the fact that despite my liking them I was terrified of them. I think Harris has some very valid points as best as I can remember, but they are a bit extreme and maybe even unrealistic. A...more
6 likes · like · see review
Oct 31, 2008
Arcyllin Arcilla
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
students, single professionals too
Recommended to Arcyllin by:
Raya Llanto
Many people would say that this book is now outdated and inapplicable. Well, I think that those who think so are either people who haven't read the book or haven't understood its message at all. After all, how can the principles of purity and faith in God be outdated?
I am not saying that this is THE ultimate guide on relationships but rather, I see it as a good foundation from which a Christian can build his or her principles upon about relationships. Remember that without foundation, the buildi...more
I am not saying that this is THE ultimate guide on relationships but rather, I see it as a good foundation from which a Christian can build his or her principles upon about relationships. Remember that without foundation, the buildi...more
I first heard of Josh Harris on a Christian radio station. I was driving and listening to him talk about the pitfalls of modern dating. I was so captivated by his message, that I sat in the car listening long after I arrived at my destination. I went and purchased this book the next day.
After the first chapter, I put it down. It was a lot to take in for an ex-feminist, control freak like me. I talked to my dad about it and decided to give the book a chance. My love life has never been the same.
I...more
After the first chapter, I put it down. It was a lot to take in for an ex-feminist, control freak like me. I talked to my dad about it and decided to give the book a chance. My love life has never been the same.
I...more
Oct 04, 2007
Vjthird
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
All Lustful People
Good thing I've read this before I got into any relationship. It doesn't tell us to geet rid of dating itself. Quoting him, there are "sinful non-daters and Godly daters." It's just a matter of putting God as the center of one's life and relationship. If it's well-established, then everything good will follow.
It teaches us to not indulge into any relationship that won't lead us nowhere. Nice romantic ones start with friendship and then it blossoms into something higher. Of course, not all relati...more
It teaches us to not indulge into any relationship that won't lead us nowhere. Nice romantic ones start with friendship and then it blossoms into something higher. Of course, not all relati...more
Dec 02, 2008
Meaghan
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
Anyone "Dating"
Recommended to Meaghan by:
My sister
I loved this book! It was so great to find that someone else wants to court and not just date/hook-up. I read it back in 2002 and it changed my life completely. There are real people seeking real relationships and not just lame excuses to jump in the sac. Fundamentally incredible!
This book has been unjustly characterized as a book of rules, telling you what you can't do, and how bad you are for wanting to be in a relationship. People who think this have COMPLETELY missed the point of the book.
It's not about what "isn't allowed", but, rather, waiting until the right time in your life to pursue romance. Romance, relationships and marriage have been so trivialized in modern society, to the point that if anybody tries to take it seriously and doesn't allow themselves to indu...more
It's not about what "isn't allowed", but, rather, waiting until the right time in your life to pursue romance. Romance, relationships and marriage have been so trivialized in modern society, to the point that if anybody tries to take it seriously and doesn't allow themselves to indu...more
I remember when I Kissed Dating Goodbye first came out - my older sister was reading it because she had started dating, and so I skimmed through it when she was finished. Since I grew up in the church, attending a private Christian (and classical) high school, most of Joshua Harris' ideas were not new to me at all. I never dated in high school, and only ended up dating (or courting) at the end of my senior year of college. I honestly don't regret how little I've dated in life - but I also can't...more
The first time I heard about this book, I was a little bit judgmental especially because of its title, being a young person who was going through a dating period at that particular moment I didn't want to hear any one telling me about stopping to date. And due to my judgmental thoughts I decided to put barrier about this book and didn't want to hear anyone tell me about it.
So a few months later during one of our Sunday services in church, our youth pastor talked about this particular book. He el...more
So a few months later during one of our Sunday services in church, our youth pastor talked about this particular book. He el...more
What it captures me to read this is "how can I attain purity in today's time?"
The book cover is capturing and it's title. It has been revised or updated. It's short but I read it more than a month. While reading this I cannot help myself to imagine what is the author's wisdom and past experiences lead him to write this with biblical and other writer's texts or like a compendium of well internalized books.
This what I'm looking for in living my faith as a Christian--protection from the death brou...more
The book cover is capturing and it's title. It has been revised or updated. It's short but I read it more than a month. While reading this I cannot help myself to imagine what is the author's wisdom and past experiences lead him to write this with biblical and other writer's texts or like a compendium of well internalized books.
This what I'm looking for in living my faith as a Christian--protection from the death brou...more
Nov 17, 2012
Terri Lynn
rated it
1 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Shelves:
are-you-kidding-or-are-you-crazy,
nonfiction
Recently a Christian friend, knowing that we are Atheists, gave me some very weird books for my 19 year old daughter who is a single, Atheist student and was angry about the books. I read through them because their weirdness was so fascinating. I was aware of this book because we homeschool just as the Harris family did (Josh is a homeschool grad).
Yes, this is very weird. I have no problems with young people going out in groups but if someone thinks this will keep them from having sex, I have s...more
Yes, this is very weird. I have no problems with young people going out in groups but if someone thinks this will keep them from having sex, I have s...more
This book and I did not become friends.
PROS
-An emphasis on getting to know people through group activities and settings, vs. awkward one-on-one dates where neither party knows each other well and are putting on a front. While this doesn't work for everyone or every setting, I think getting to know people outside of a dating sphere is a wonderful idea.
-Discouragement from focusing one's high school experience on having a significant other. I did not date in high school, by choice. It had nothing...more
PROS
-An emphasis on getting to know people through group activities and settings, vs. awkward one-on-one dates where neither party knows each other well and are putting on a front. While this doesn't work for everyone or every setting, I think getting to know people outside of a dating sphere is a wonderful idea.
-Discouragement from focusing one's high school experience on having a significant other. I did not date in high school, by choice. It had nothing...more
I read this book a while ago and remember really liking it. I don't think that it's THE DATING BIBLE that has all the answers, but I do think that it causes you to look at "dating" in a different way. It causes you to have a more mature mindset on finding the right person for you.
I wouldn't go as far to say that this book changed my life...mainly because I pretty much had these same ideals before reading (except for the whole saving the first kiss until marriage aspect LOL). I know that when I...more
I wouldn't go as far to say that this book changed my life...mainly because I pretty much had these same ideals before reading (except for the whole saving the first kiss until marriage aspect LOL). I know that when I...more
Interesting idea and understandable concepts if you are in high school and college. I really think that people could benefit from the idea. However, for those who are college aged and higher, it's method of finding a spouse I find to be an exercise in immaturity and for those who are not in a high-volume, high opportunity situation (like college is), you may find yourself incredibly lonely practicing these concepts.
I call it an exercise in immaturity because by avoiding dating altogether, you a...more
I call it an exercise in immaturity because by avoiding dating altogether, you a...more
I thought the book title was preaching to the choir at & before the time I read it--I didn't care for the dating scene & still don't, but I like having some purpose to being single, rather than just accepting it as an accidental fate.
Josh Harris does a good job writing the book, & I feel bad that I didn't love it like so many people who reviewed it did.
It seemed odd that the premise of the book is "dating is stupid; but don't quit dating just b/c it's stupid, quit b/c there's somethi...more
Josh Harris does a good job writing the book, & I feel bad that I didn't love it like so many people who reviewed it did.
It seemed odd that the premise of the book is "dating is stupid; but don't quit dating just b/c it's stupid, quit b/c there's somethi...more
I read this book because I was absolutely aggravated with the male race. I had recently broken up with a man that was supposed to be my future husband (we were engaged) but turned out to be nothing more that a man-child who was more worried about himself then me. I was desperate to figure out what I had done wrong and how to fix it fast because I wasn't getting any younger!! But after reading this book, SURPRISE, God instead chose to take me on a deeper journey that has lead me down a path I nev...more
Jul 22, 2011
Benjamin
rated it
4 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Shelves:
christian,
relationship
I resisted reading this book a lot. Mostly because I've encountered some very smug "we do courtship!" type of people who think date is a four letter word. If you have those qualms about reading this book, just pick it up & read the introduction - he isn't that extreme. Later on in the book there's a great chapter about how to talk about your not dating without putting people off.
Because of my own life, I've actually come to many of the same conclusions that Joshua reaches, so my hesitation...more
Because of my own life, I've actually come to many of the same conclusions that Joshua reaches, so my hesitation...more
| topics | posts | views | last activity | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Am I the only one that doesn't date? | 32 | 253 | 22 hours, 57 min ago | |
| What is your view on dating? | 4 | 20 | Sep 11, 2012 12:32pm | |
| God's Swordmaidens: Courtship vs. Dating | 22 | 39 | Apr 26, 2012 09:09am | |
| The Filipino Group: [Buddy Reads] I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris (Cary, Alona, Kwesi & Sheryl). Start Date: January 25, Tuesday | 82 | 45 | Feb 08, 2012 12:43am |
Joshua Harris lives outside Washington, D.C., in Gaithersburg, Maryland, where he's a pastor at Covenant Life Church. His greatest passion is preaching the gospel and calling his generation to wholehearted devotion to God. Each January he leads a national conference for singles called New Attitude.
More about Joshua Harris...
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“When God knows you're ready for the responsibility of commitment, He'll reveal the right person under the right circumstances.”
—
230 people liked it
“A Woman's Question
Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman's heart, and a woman's life---
And a woman's wonderful love.
Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing
As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With a reckless dash of boy.
You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now stand at the bars of my woman's soul
Until I shall question thee.
You require your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart be true as God's stars
And as pure as His heaven your soul.
You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing;
A seamstress you're wanting for socks and shirts---
I look for a man and a king.
A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker, God,
Shall look upon as He did on the first
And say: "It is very good."
I am fair and young, but the rose may fade
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me then 'mid the falling leaves,
As you did 'mong the blossoms of May?
Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride.
I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I would stake my life
To be all you demand of me.
If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman's heart and a woman's life
Are not to be won that way.”
—
218 people liked it
More quotes…
Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman's heart, and a woman's life---
And a woman's wonderful love.
Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing
As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With a reckless dash of boy.
You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now stand at the bars of my woman's soul
Until I shall question thee.
You require your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart be true as God's stars
And as pure as His heaven your soul.
You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing;
A seamstress you're wanting for socks and shirts---
I look for a man and a king.
A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker, God,
Shall look upon as He did on the first
And say: "It is very good."
I am fair and young, but the rose may fade
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me then 'mid the falling leaves,
As you did 'mong the blossoms of May?
Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride.
I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I would stake my life
To be all you demand of me.
If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman's heart and a woman's life
Are not to be won that way.”
Feb 14, 2013 06:24pm