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Mars and Venus on a Date: A Guide for Navigating the 5 Stages of Dating to Create a Loving and Lasting Relationship

3.82  ·  Rating Details ·  1,932 Ratings  ·  130 Reviews
Will I Ever Find My Soul Mate?

Whether you are recently separated, divorced, or you have been in the singles scene for longer than you want, this insightful guide will help you navigate the dating maze and find that special person you've been waiting for.

By discussing the differences between men and women, Mars and Venus on a Date provides singles with:

A thorough understand
ebook, 400 pages
Published October 6th 2009 by HarperCollins e-books (first published 1997)
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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
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Jason DeGroot
Another informative and helpful book from Dr. Gray, though this one was a lot more uneven. The first half was great, and once again taught me that I've pretty much been doing everything wrong dating-wise in terms of laying a strong foundation for a long-term relationship. His discussion of the five stages of dating was immensely helpful and also helped explain why some relationships haven't worked out for me.

About halfway through, though, it started to feel like Gray was getting paid by the word
K Dog
Jun 23, 2007 K Dog rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
my guy friend gave this to me, I didn't like it. Couldn't finish it. I read this sentence in the book where it said women should not give guys directions if they are lost or tell the guy he is lost. Hello are we supposed to drive around all night getting more lost??? with these gas prices...uh no!
Apr 10, 2011 Christa rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
When I want to learn how to do something well, I read up on the topic. And yes, that even applies to dating. This is, hands down, the best dating book I've ever read. Gray does an excellent job at explaining the wonderful (but sometimes baffling) differences between the genders. It helps each to better understand how the other interprets those little things that can make or break dating in its fragile early stages, which is particularly helpful for a generation who just doesn't date anymore. Gra ...more
Apr 08, 2010 GoldenjoyBazyll rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: self-help
What did I learn from this book? That I am still learning. As I read- I thought about the relationships I have had in my life and what I have learned about myself from them. It was also interesting reading about the stages of dating. In truth- I agree with the approach of moving slower and really getting to know each other.

What I find from many of these books- which leaves me at a loss- is where is the wisdom and advice for those of us whose relationships go amuck as a result of situational cha
Jenn Andrew
After my seven-year marriage dissolved, I felt I needed something to get me in tune to the dating scene of the new era. A friend of mine had suggested this book so I read it with speculation and hesitation. I am glad that I did because I enjoyed it.

John Gray, the well known author of the best selling book Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, takes you through the steps and stages of dating so that you end up in a lasting relationship. He lists five stages that you have to go through succ
Rain Grrl
Apr 04, 2013 Rain Grrl rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This was a great book. I had read it before, and just finished reading it with a group of women. Some were afraid that they hadn't read the original Mars and Venus book and would be lost. That is not the case. Every concept that Gray discusses, he explains fully. He mentions the first book occasionally but information is not missing.
My biggest concern is that the book is very dated. It leans back to a much "simpler" time, and has zero advice about online dating websites and the new ways men and
Dec 13, 2012 Ed rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
The genders do have different ways of processing and communicating things. In this book, John Gray offers standard trends with each gender in terms of dating rituals. Some may be critical of the sweeping generalizations, "Not all men do ...." "Not all women feel ..." but his intent is to only share what the majority often feel, react to, and methods typically used to communicate wants, needs and emotions.

If you get the chance, read this book with a member of the opposite sex. Read a chapter the
Dec 27, 2014 CG FEWSTON rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Mars and Venus on a Date: A Guide for Navigating the 5 Stages of Dating to Create a Loving and Lasting Relationship (1997) by Dr. John Gray is a companion to the more well-known Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Men and Venus on a Date, however, provides deeper insight into the world of couples trying to figure out the rules and taboos to dating a Martian or Venusian and holds keys that will unlock the mystery of communication and how to build a stronger and more loving relationship with ...more
Mar 13, 2014 Tanya rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I think every human of relationship age should read this book. Great breakdown of the typical differences between the genders and how those differences affect one's instincts in a romantic relationship. Suddenly things make sense. Light bulbs start burning bright. I've read a few decent relationship books, but this one breaks down such basic differences that it should be a prerequisite to the others. The book only briefly touches on being a strong, self-aware and confident individual before atte ...more
Mar 24, 2014 Saadia rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I am a great fan of John Gray ever since the first "Men are from Mars, etc..." book was published. I found his explanations and examples most helpful.

Now that I am in my new marriage and being a self-improvement junkie, I naturally turn to my trusted reference sources for enlightenment. So I read this book for better understanding of my own relationship and tips on finessing log jams.

I highly recommend constant tuning up in one's life. With my daughter recently married, I think about the ministe
Nhu Luong
Jan 12, 2015 Nhu Luong rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Sep 11, 2011 Jo rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Coming from an extremely dysfunctional family, I was very unsuccessful at dating and finding a soulmate. It wasn't until I read Mars and Venus on a date that I realized I had no idea how to date or have a successful relationship. Most self help books address the problems people have when they are already in a relationship, but this one starts from the first date. It was the single most helpful book I have found on the subject of building a positive relationaship. Thank you, John Gray
It was informative and very much based on evolutionary facts (ex men are work-oriented). There's a lot of facts in the book that wasn't very much universal. For example, shy people would approach dating in a very different approach than what he described men and women to be. The tidbit on continuing attraction sounds useful, but I haven't used it in reality yet. So let's see
Mar 10, 2008 Kat rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: all women, single or taken
This is a book all single women should have on their bookshelf. I was amazed how many of my different relationships followed so many of the stages. It helped me realized the things I was doing wrong right from the start. I don't know if reading it changed anything I was doing but it was at least fun to be able to see what path I went down.
Kryssy Kirsch
Jan 11, 2009 Kryssy Kirsch rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I couldn't finish the book. 2 plus chapters in, and it made me so angry. Yes there were some good points, but then again, I don't need to buy a book to tell me these pointers, my amazing friends have told me some of these things. I don't believe in "soul mates" or "soul love" so I found this book to be extremely corny and truly not informative.
Nov 11, 2015 Margo rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I really enjoyed reading this book and my only regret is not reading it sooner. There is an enormous amount of useful information and actually a lot of information that has helped me see what went wrong on previous relationships. Excellent read and a great companion to "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus."
I understood men better after reading this book. One insight that stood out was the fact that men like to talk about what they DO in a social setting such as a date, which women often perceive as boring and arrogant. That explained a lot to me though. :-) Oh, and women would rather talk about how they feel.
Nov 30, 2015 Neri. rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I enjoyed this book which actually tells truth about dating and relationship. More people should read it so they could understand what it is different goals in relationships and in life.
Mar 27, 2010 Leahjoypro rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Should be required reading for anyone who ever wants to have a successful dating relationship or marriage
I actually listened to this a couple times through, because whoa I am utterly clueless when it comes to dudes. Though now slightly less so (I hope). This is actually a pretty interesting book, and I had more than one "ohhhhhh, so THAT'S what that was all about" moment. My favorite part is that the author reads the audiobook, and his manner is very conversational and nice to listen to--so much so that at some points you can hear him get worked up explaining why men and women are so often getting ...more
I like to know how things work. Even the vaguer things like relationships and interpersonal relations. This was a very decent book on relationships and, more specifically, dating. I didn't need advice on dating, per se. But nonetheless found Gray's ideas on the stages of a relationship, and how to build a strong foundation from the get-go, very interesting and useful.

We all navigate through our relationships mostly intuitively (to our benefit or downfall). I find it very interesting to read the
Ana - Maria Lenghel
De 10 minute am terminat cartea aceasta, care mi s-a parut extraordinara. O prietena de-a mea si-a comandat-o de pe internet, iar mai apoi i-a adus-o si surorii mele. Cu toate ca stiam de cateva luni ca am mari probleme in domeniul relatiilor amoroase, nu am fost deloc incantata cand am luat prima data cartea in mana. Am inceput s-o citesc din cauza entuziasmului cu care mi-a fost prezentata, insa nu stiam ce avea sa mi se intample... In prima noapte am ramas cu ea in mana pana la 4:30 dimineata ...more
Wayne Miller
Dec 19, 2015 Wayne Miller rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
First I agree with about 60% of the book. The core ideas are solid in their theory. It is amazing how gender reactions are mostly true to what he describes. Just understanding a few of the principles could have saved me some serious sleepless nights. Fathers buy your sons a copy but read it first. If you don't have a son wives get it for your husbands.
Stephen Grilley
Jul 14, 2013 Stephen Grilley rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
RE: Mars and Venus on a Date: A Guide for Navigating the 5 Stages of Dating to Create a Loving and Lasting Relationship (Kindle Edition)

I am grateful for the opportunity to experience this book while in a new relationship. I became aware of habits I have carried for many years that do not contribute to a relatively healthy relationship...and was able to experience reliable discernment(s) from the relationship's 'other half' in 'real time'. Awesome! Next book and perhaps the next perfect gift to
Ho Quang
Jun 01, 2016 Ho Quang rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A very useful book that helps us to understand the difference in how men and women think, intuitively and analytically, perceive, connect, communicate, and grow up under various socio-cultural impacts to become ourselves. A great book for young adults to maintain and develop relationships.
Mar 04, 2008 billy rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: people who fuck up at love time and again
Recommended to billy by: joanie wolkoff (via zoe greenburg)
It's nice to actually think about dating sometimes, to not just believe that it's this magical organic process of getting swept off yr feet. He breaks down our approaches pretty simply: it's more satisfying to please a woman than to be pleased. I can roll with that. Here's to courtship.

Overall, this book more often addresses women and what they need to do to get a solid dude. It also was a little embarrassing to read on the subway--and I read some pretty embarrassing shit. For two pages, he brok
Nick Davies
Feb 12, 2016 Nick Davies rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This was given to me by an ex-girlfriend (yes, yes, I know what you're saying - but it was several years after she and I split up, and it was given to me as an aid to for wooing the girl I was trying to woo at the time) and was surprisingly readable, surprisingly correct with regards male and female psychology, and did perchance have some useful impact. Simple stuff like how a man on a date will get upset if it rains, because he sees himself responsible for everything trying to make a date pleas ...more
Mar 19, 2016 Julie rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Some good advice, some hilarious advice. Thanks to Mr Gray I'm feeling more kindly disposed towards the last man I went out with who spent our first two dates singing his own praises with barely a pause for breath and didn't ask me a single question. He was just advertising, it's what they do on Mars apparently. I am looking forward to being self assured, receptive and responsive on any future dates. However I'm not sure I'll be juicing up my compliments as advised, from 'I am happy we did this' ...more
Jan 10, 2009 Reeny rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
A friend of mine recommended I read this book to get a better understanding of why I was so different from my better half. Although I was totally in love and happy, I felt that he was moving substantially slower than me. I read the book thinking it was going to hold the answers to all my questions... not the case. Patience is a virtue, as I have now discovered. This book basically told me everything we already know. Men and women are two different beings, neither understanding the other.
I thin
Jan 14, 2016 Holly rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Great concepts for everyone to know! Even if you think you already 'know', you might need a refresher! This is written from both perspectives! Great book! Secrets you may have never considered!
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Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.

John Gray is an American author on relationships and personal growth, best known for his 1992 book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, and other "pop psychology" books offering relationship advice.

He was previously married to fellow self-help author Barbara De Angelis, but they divorced in 1984. He is now m
More about John Gray...

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“That love motivates you to cooperate, respect, appreciate, cherish, and admire that person.” 17 likes
“Although feelings of attraction are automatic, in order to sustain attraction in a personal relationship we must also be skillful in presenting ourselves in ways that are not just appealing to the other sex but supportive as well. It is not enough to say, “Here I am; take me as I am.” 4 likes
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