Real Love
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Real Love

4.22 of 5 stars 4.22  ·  rating details  ·  159 ratings  ·  35 reviews
With Real Love, nothing else matters; without it, nothing else is enough.Why do most people spend their whole lives searching for loving and happy relationships but rarely find them? What is the "secret something" that all relationships need in order to thrive? Dr. Greg Baer found the answers to these questions while working with hundreds of individuals and couples. In Rea...more
ebook, 288 pages
Published January 1st 2004 by Gotham Books (first published January 27th 2003)
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I am very conflicted about this book. I can't decide if the author is a genious or an idealistic whack-job. It's entirely possible that his theory is the ultimate in emotional evolution. It's also entirely possible that he has severely over-simplified human emotions and behaviors. Or maybe, I'm just not ready to accept it because of my own emotions and behaviors.

The basic premise that the world would be a much better place if everyone felt unconditional love and that defense mechanisms we use co...more
I love this book; it is written in a way that really hit home for me. I think that this book along with Eckart Tolle's A New Earth - is the answer to a happy life. It shows me how to stop playing a victim and learn to find unconditional love in my life, and to give it in return. It's an excellent companion to my twelve step work.
This book has some very good concepts.

It says you need to find Real Love (Unconditional Love). But I believe that Real Love is already there for all of us, just waiting to be grabbed and it is offered through Jesus Christ.

It tells you to step out in faith and tell the truth about yourself to people, Wise Men, it calls them and while a lot will reject you, some won't and will love you. While I agree with this, FIRST I believe that we must seek Jesus for our love, allow him to shower us in it. Hi...more
The first page grabs you like no other.
Jun 18, 2008 Pam rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: everyone
Recommended to Pam by: my life coach
This book changed my life's path.
I have read a lot of self help books lately and the most frustrating thing I've realized through all of them is the writers believe they have the ONE answer to solve all the worlds problems so half of the book is them trying to sell you on an idea. But we are all so different and have such different life experiences and are all so unique that I just cant believe there is only one way to fix everyone.

This book became insanely repetitive. Each "example" story was the same as the last except for t...more
I don't normally enjoy self-help titles. Greg Baer's theory on Real Love is not perfect. My critiques are small compared to how much I approved of the overall message. It attempts to increase unconditional love. It's a book that generally explains inter-personal relationships.

This is the first self-help book that spoke to my needs and helped me understand what motivates anyone to seek Imitation Love (praise, power, pleasure and safety) in place of unconditional love. And I appreciate now being...more
Elizabeth Heller
I got a lot out of this book. I had to face things about myself that I struggle with, and I learned useful tools for dealing with the problems in my relationships. I really am glad I read it and would recommend it to everyone. That said, it can be preachy and repetitive- it could have been shorter and possibly more effective. it was also particularly useful for me to be reading it in the context of recently reading Brene Brown's work about worthiness and vulnerability and having studied the Dali...more
This book sounds cheesy, but it's actually really good! It gets to the true heart/root of any kind of unhappiness. The first half of the book I found discouraging and depressing (because the truth can be hard to take), but the second half is more empowering and encouraging. Although this book is geared towards couples, it's actually my new favorite PARENTING BOOK! I've been able to be more loving and less angry/annoyed with my kids. Our relationship and their behavior has changed as well. A grea...more
This is, hands down, the most practical 'how to' guide to loving without condition! If we were able to communicate with each from this place of real love...I agree with Dr. Greg Baer that we could solve all of the world's problems! I highly recommend reading...and more importantly, implementing these approaches to unconditionally loving and being loved.
Clear and consice; this could be a course 101 on relationship and life skills requirement for college and highschool. However, it is downright tragic that modern society has no real concept of what really needs to be taught in basic life skills. Hats off to Greg Baer in taking the effort to put it down here in writing.
Brandon Keown
For the most part I believe the message this author conveys to be a truly constructive manner by which to proceed in relationships. I do disagree with the author in his views on God and sexuality as they seem to be arbitrary and don't actually match up with anthropological evidence (for instance, modern marriage is a construct that has not existed for that long, so saying only have sex in marriage does not make any sense to me). This is why the book lost one star because while he claimed it wasn...more
I've read too many relationship books, sad to say but this one really has changed the way I see myself and all of my relationships.
One of those books I wish I would have read many moons ago. It might have changed the path of my marriage.
Very good, from a man's perspective.
This book has important insights into the reasons that most people feel somewhat isolated or lacking in their lives even if they are "doing everything right." The author uses his experiences as a highly successful opthalmic surgeon and his subsequent descent into narcotics as the "hit bottom" moment of his life. He realizes that without "Real Love" (aka unconditional love--both given and received) all the money, fame, achievement, and beautiful children will not fill the void created by the abse...more
Tami Strom
When I was first introduced to Real Love, I thought I knew what love was. I had no idea! Over the past 18 months or so I have learned so much and it started with the principles that I began learning in this book. What I'm learning is how to feel loved, be loving and take responsibility for myself. I have more peace, and happiness, and gratitude in my life than I ever dreamed was possible.

A previous boyfriend gave me this book and I finally got around to reading it because I was tired of being in short term relationships and looking for a more permanent one. Most of my relationships ended because of blaming partners for my mistakes, making demands, high expectations, and entertaining me. I was only setting myself up to be unhappy in these relationships. "When we're unhappy, our misery is not the fault of our partner. Blaming that person is therefore foolish, wasteful and destruct...more
This book was eye opening. It was one man's perception of how love is expressed in our world today. It was about how we communicate with one another and how that communication influences who we are and how we feel about ourselves and the world around us. This is not a read for someone looking for solid philosophy or proven theories of phsychology. But it does make you think about peoples perceptions of your communication with them and if those you love are really know how you feel. There was som...more
Jennifer George
The principles found in this book changed the way I see myself, other people and the world in general. I have found peace and happiness I never knew existed. Life changing!!
This book will change your life! It teaches you a whole new way to view your relationships and treat the people in your life.
I really enjoyed this book. my client told me that they were reading this book as a family and I decided to read it to know what they were talking about. I am glad I did. I highly recommend this book, it has changed my view on love and I feel that it has guided me to strengthening my relationship with my spouse, the way I interact with my children, improve relationships with family and friends, and with God.
The message is terrific and I totally agree with it. Like many self-help books, the author is extremely repetitive, which can be annoying. In any event, despite the rather simplistic message and lack of meaningful research, it resonates and I recommend to anyone who has relationships. :-)
Bob Jordan
Played a vital role in changing how I think and how I act and react toward others. Is there a non cliche phrase for "game-changer"? If there is, that phrase describes the impact this idea has had on me.
Great book on unconditional love. It really helped me have a positive paradigm shift and directly impacted my life in a positive way and helped me extricate myself out of a difficult situation with class.
Kelli Padden-Gulla
Really enjoyed this book .. Definetely a good read. Great messages and always good when books open your mind to new positive thoughts. all books don't work for everyone but this one I recommend.
This is a FANTASTIC book. I highly recommend it if you are trying to understand why people do what they do, and how to handle and/or change things to be happier.
I've read many relationship books and I think this one is the best I've encountered. I also met the author and attended a workshop he gave. Powerful stuff!
Oct 05, 2010 Santica rated it 3 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Santica by: Kyle Holtzman
Not much of a fan of reading any more "self-help" books, but this one was given to me by my significant other so I feel pulled to read it.
Markham Anderson
I was unable to learn nearly so much in two and a half decades of religion as I learned from reading this book.
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Thoughts? 5 13 Jan 28, 2014 12:36PM  
Real Love in Marriage: The Truth About Finding Genuine Happiness Now and Forever Real Love in Parenting - Nine Simple and Powerfully Effective Principles for Raising Happy and Responsible Children Real Love and Freedom for the Soul: Eliminating the Chains of Victimhood Real Love in Dating - The Truth about Finding the Perfect Partner Real Love in the Workplace - Eight Principles for Consistently Effective Leadership in Business

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