Between a Rock and a Hot Place: Why Fifty Is Not the New Thirty

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Between a Rock and a Hot Place: Why Fifty Is Not the New Thirty

by Tracey Jackson (Goodreads Author)

2.98 of 5 stars 2.98 · rating details · 130 ratings · 53 reviews

A funny, fearless, no-holds-barred look at aging--hormone replacement therapy, online dating, eye lifts, and all

As she approached her fiftieth birthday, Tracey Jackson found herself bombarded--at the gym, at parties, in conversations with friends--by a catchphrase on everyone's lips. "Fifty is the new thirty" and the endless magazine articles, photos, and T-shirts proclaim...more

Paperback, Large Print, 287 pages

Published February 15th 2011 by HarperLuxe (first published 2010)

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Feb 23, 2012 Sandi marked it as lemmed · review of another edition

Shelves: non-fiction, funny-stuff, library-books-returned-unread

I'm turning 50 in a few weeks and thought this would be good. It turned out to be more of a humorous memoir than a really look about what it means to be 50 in 2011. I got about halfway through and found some of it humorous, but I mostly had trouble relating to Ms. Jackson's observations about being 50 through the generations. She looks back at her grandmother and her mother at 50 and compares her 50 to theirs. I really couldn't accept these women as models of their generations because my own gra...more

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Jul 22, 2012 McGuffy Morris rated it 4 of 5 stars

Much is written on young women, young mothers, and it is wonderful because it didn't used to be that way. Women muddled through it all on their own, afraid to speak of their struggles.

Then it was about turning forty, and "The Change". It was almost a shame or a curse, and again, women carried it on their own.

Now there is a book about and for women 50 and over. Tracey Jackson takes on aging with candid humour. She is both brave and honest in facing the realities of aging.

Tracey shows no fear in d...more

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Jul 02, 2012 Sara rated it 5 of 5 stars

God damn I have never laughed so hard while being in absolute fear of what was to come. Normally people don't laugh when you read about how your body will turn into a horrible, angsty place but you absolutely will in this book.

I remember being a teenager and my mom would wonder when she would go through menopause- all of her friends were doing it, her mom was dead so she had no idea when she did it or what it was like, and no doctor can really tell you. And I remember the exact day when my mom...more

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May 14, 2012 Leeswammes rated it 5 of 5 stars

The subtitle of this book is Why Fifty is the New Fifty. In other words, fifty is not the new thirty as most people seem to think. Jackson does a good job at dispelling any such idea. Fifty most certainly is not the new thirty. And being 50 is not as much fun as being 30, but you can go some way in making something of it.

Tracey Jackson is a comedy writer who explain in a very personal and funny way, how “her” 50 is not that of her grandmother’s but why it isn’t 30 either. I think she does a bril...more The subtitle of this book is Why Fifty is the New Fifty. In other words, fifty is not the new thirty as most people seem to think. Jackson does a good job at dispelling any such idea. Fifty most certainly is not the new thirty. And being 50 is not as much fun as being 30, but you can go some way in making something of it.

Tracey Jackson is a comedy writer who explain in a very personal and funny way, how “her” 50 is not that of her grandmother’s but why it isn’t 30 either. I think she does a brilliant job of preparing me, the unsuspecting forty-something, for the harsh reality of being 50-something.

First Jackson compares herself to her grandmother and her mother and notices how 50-somethings like her are younger looking, more active, and take better care of their bodies than the 50+ in previous generations. So far so good.

But then: menopauze! Symptoms can be depression, weight gain, and much more. Time for a pill, or maybe not?

And then: want a new job? Ok, but do they want you? Probably not, unless you’re already a big star in your profession.

And furthermore: the children are moving out, leaving you wondering what to do with your empty nest; you need to work (hard) to keep those looks you had at 40 (botox? gym? both?); sooner or later you will have less money (think: no job or fewer assignments, pensions); if you’re single, men your age may be looking at women who actually are in their 30s rather than just pretending; people your age start dying around you, from health issues rather than accidental causes.

It sounds like a lot of misery. But: Jackson says: if you’re prepared for it, and willing to work on it, getting older doesn’t have to be all that bad. The book is written in a fun way, it gives you the very personal experience (including trial and error) of Tracey Jackson herself.

In each chapter she describes one of the issues and how she learned to deal with it. I got a good insight in growing older gracefully and got some great tips!

If you’re in your 40s or 50s, you will likely enjoy this personal story of growing older.(less)

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Mar 13, 2011 The Sunday Book Review added it · review of another edition

The subtitle already had me connected with the book : Why Fifty is Not The New Thirty. While I am not a woman in my 50's, I am a woman. And no matter what age we are at, it always seems like we should be younger. That's what they keep telling us anyway.

Menopause is discussed greatly in this book. It is a book about turning 50 after all. And let me tell you, it is not for the squeemish. Tracey Jackson does not hold anything back. Which is good and oh so bad. She does play with the topic with some...more

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Feb 07, 2011 Diane rated it 4 of 5 stars

I don't normally don't read 'self-help' books, but since I can see the age of 50 peeking around the corner, Tracey Jackson's Between a Rock and a Hot Place- Why Fifty is Not the New Thirty beckoned to me.

Jackson takes us on her own personal journey to the age of fifty. She takes on menopause and hormone replacement therapy, marriage, sex, online dating, work and cosmetic surgery.

She starts with her grandmother's generation, women who lived through the depression, and therefore turning fifty was...more I don't normally don't read 'self-help' books, but since I can see the age of 50 peeking around the corner, Tracey Jackson's Between a Rock and a Hot Place- Why Fifty is Not the New Thirty beckoned to me.

Jackson takes us on her own personal journey to the age of fifty. She takes on menopause and hormone replacement therapy, marriage, sex, online dating, work and cosmetic surgery.

She starts with her grandmother's generation, women who lived through the depression, and therefore turning fifty was not traumatic to them. Those women did not try to avoid getting older; they were grateful for it.

Jackson's mother was one of the first women in her age group to jump on the cosmetic surgery bandwagon. She watched her mother try every cream, new procedure, and even travel to Eastern Europe for treatments not yet available in the United States. (Who knew Eastern Europe was the Fountain of Youth?) It's interesting that she and her mother are now estranged.

Menopause is a big topic in the book, and Jackson describes her symptoms in graphic detail; it's like a horror movie for middle-aged women. She takes on the hormone replacement controversy head-on, and I liked that she told her own story, she didn't preach to us as to the ultimate answer for all women. It's up to us all to research, talk to our doctors and make our own decisions.

Speaking of doctors, she comments that
"When I was thirty, I had four doctors in my address book: a gynecologist, a dentist, a GP and a vet. At fifty, I have thirty-four."
Even though she admits to being a bit of a hypochondriac, she still has a point. Think about how many specialists we have to see now that we're older :gynecologist, radiologist, cardiologist, endocrinologist, dermatologist, gastoenterologist- you get the idea.

There is some humor in the book, and the scene she describes where she and her husband decide to spice up their love life by purchasing some adult toys is too funny. She has to get her reading glasses to see the tiny print on the instructions, and then a part of it rolls under the bed where the dog refuses to give it up. It's like an x-rated I Love Lucy episode.

Jackson also takes on some topics not usually mentioned in books about aging. She is a screenwriter, and she talks about the difficulties of a woman trying to find work after the age of fifty. Sexism/ageism is alive and well in her work arena, and I'm sure many women in other fields know her pain. Her frustration is painful to read, but her determination to find a way to work at something she loves is inspiring.

She also takes on the invisibility of women to men after a certain age. Once women are no longer young, men no longer look at them. Her honesty about this topic really speaks to women.

Jackson writes honestly about her life, and her thoughts on aging really gave me food for thought. Her writing style is concise, as one would expect from a screenwriter, so the book read quickly. Any woman heading towards menopause will do well to buy this book.
(less)

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Feb 05, 2011 cheryl rated it 4 of 5 stars

As with many of the books that the lovely folks at Harper supply for my perusal, I am probably not in the target market for Between a Rock and a Hot Place: Why Fifty Is Not the New Thirty by Tracey Jackson. In many ways, it is aimed at the menopausal crowd and I'm a bit shy of that. I did, however, thoroughly enjoy the ride and give it a confident 4 of 5 stars.

The book is a series of inter-related essays in which Jackson reflects on the reality of aging. She looks at how advancing age affects ma...more

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Jul 21, 2011 Joyce rated it 2 of 5 stars

Book is funny in parts but this author is part of a social group that I can't relate to. I thought her advice about finding work after 50 was generally good advice for people of all ages. She basically said that #1 you shouldn't count on there being a job that you want to do out there waiting for you (all you need to do is find it and apply) but you #2 need to look within yourself and around you at what you have to hand right now and work with that to build your work. The pieces at hand may cont...more

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May 22, 2012 Keri rated it 2 of 5 stars

The only reason I'm giving this 2 stars instead of 1 is because I did actually laugh at the chapter where the author talks about trying to rev up her sex life by buying new gadgets, but must search through the house naked to find her glasses so she can read the directions. The first 1/3 of the book attempts to try to normalize the changes that are happening to aging women, and to assure us that although we may look younger than our ancestors, there are biological changes that can't be ignored. S...more

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Mar 28, 2012 Mary (BookHounds) rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: 2012, from-publisher-author

MY THOUGHTS
LOVED IT

Tracey Jackson writes about what I suspected all along: all of this trying to act, be, look younger is not worth it and fifty is not the new thirty no matter how much "work" you do -- your insides are still a ticking timebomb. She gracefully delves into the aging dilemma that women my age (yes, fifty) are now being bombarded with in the media. Hormone replacement therapy, plastic surgery, keeping fit and eating right are all tackled in this book of essays all linked together b...more

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Dec 23, 2011 Melody rated it 3 of 5 stars

Many parts of this book resonated with me, though some made me snort scornfully. The author, who was a screenwriter in Hollywood for most of her career, places far more value on looking youthful than do I. Reading about all the "work" she has had done of her face was certainly interesting, though. There's a lot of good stuff in this book- Jackson's contention that fifty is fifty and it's never going to be thirty rings true. Some of the chapters seemed relentlessly downbeat, though- when her elde...more

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Apr 10, 2011 Rosemaryknits rated it 2 of 5 stars

It was OK - the author is exceedingly pleased with herself. Parts of the book, I liked. Other parts? Meh. It could have been so much better. This book is not about WOMEN turning 50, it is about TRACEY turning 50. Very self-centered.

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Mar 28, 2011 Kate Woods Walker rated it 3 of 5 stars

Not quite an autobiography, not quite a memoir, not quite a book of humorous essays, not quite a self-help book, Between a Rock and Hot Place: Why Fifty is Not the New Thirty by Tracey Jackson was a nice, semi-fluffy read about how to be a better Aging Baby Boomer.

Although Ms. Jackson and I share the same age bracket and an A.M.C. Gremlin-sized container of cultural references, we don't share the same income level or social class; therefore, the lengthy meditations about injectibles, plastic sur...more

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May 12, 2012 Dana rated it 4 of 5 stars

In this book, Tracey gives a humerous look at what it is like to be fifty years old today. She explains the pitfalls of menopause and the benefits of hormone replacement therapy, and it's effect on everything from your body, to moods, to sex life. She talks about face lifts and botox and her experiences with those. She discusses the problem that fifty-somethings now have in the job market, discusses what dating is like at fifty - including her experiment with an online dating service a bit remin...more

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Mar 08, 2012 Julie rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: nonfiction

There's a saying out there in the world today: Fifty is the new thirty. And Tracey Jackson couldn't disagree more. In Between a Rock and a Hot Place, Jackson explains why fifty is not the new thirty. In fact, fifty is the new fifty. It's not our grandmother's fifty and it's not our mother's fifty, but it's our new fifty.

It's hard to review a book like this without giving away some personal details. So I will admit that I hit a big milestone at the beginning of February. I turned 40. I'm a decade...more There's a saying out there in the world today: Fifty is the new thirty. And Tracey Jackson couldn't disagree more. In Between a Rock and a Hot Place, Jackson explains why fifty is not the new thirty. In fact, fifty is the new fifty. It's not our grandmother's fifty and it's not our mother's fifty, but it's our new fifty.

It's hard to review a book like this without giving away some personal details. So I will admit that I hit a big milestone at the beginning of February. I turned 40. I'm a decade away from 50 but I could definitely relate to several of the chapters in this book. Menopause is something I think about a lot, and the chapter about that was both informative and funny. I also could relate to Jackson's thoughts on mammograms since I had my first last year ~ and just got the letter in the mail saying I'm due for another one this month. And I have similar memories of my grandmother in her 50s with the tight, gray curls and weekly visits to the salon! Definitely different than my mother at 50 and I much different than what I expect I'll be like at 50!

I found it interesting that Jackson had her first child at 32, as I did, so like her, my son will be heading off to college the year I turn 50. I read that chapter with a lot of interest since I'll be going through the same issues dealing with my first-born leaving home at the same time that I'm dealing with all the changes that go along with turning 50. I also remember my mother's experience turning 50, and it was not good.

Unfortunately, Jackson lost me when she got into plastic surgery and Botox. An entire chapter is dedicated to this topic, and while I guess I'd consider having work done someday, I just couldn't relate. At 40, I'm pretty happy with my face so it's hard to imagine it would be so bad that I'd be willing to go through what she's gone through! I do color my hair though, and will not change that. I'd be gray at 40 if I didn't color it, and I'm not okay with that. But I honestly felt she was a bit condescending to those women who make the choice to forgo having any "work" done.

Overall, this was an interesting memoir to read at my age. I think anyone from about 40 to 60 would enjoy it. Maybe even older ~ I may pass it along to my mom. I'm not sure anyone under 40 would be able to really relate completely. And I will warn readers that this is not just a funny book. There are funny aspects, but there are plenty of serious topics covered as well.(less)

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May 21, 2012 Julie rated it 4 of 5 stars

In this youth orientated culture, it seems like aging certainly for women is made to be a bit taboo. We hear lots of advice for girls at purberty and childbearing years, but menopause is only to be discussed in daytime shows like Dr Oz or buried in obscure old ladies magazines.

I really liked Traceys book, which is more a memoir peppered with her own advice about the changes in her life as she moved towards and past fifty. Her ideas about HRT, plastic surgery, working, motherhood, sexuality and a...more

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Feb 27, 2012 Natashya KitchenPuppies rated it 4 of 5 stars

(My book jacket has a slightly different wording on the subtitle - Why Fifty is the New Fifty)

We've all heard the claims that fifty is the new thirty. (Rarely made by thirty-year-olds, unless they are placating their mothers.)

Veteran screenwriter Tracey Jackson has a bone to pick with that. In her candid and hilarious first book, Between a Rock and a Hot Place, Why Fifty is the New Fifty, she explores and shares her own experience with aging - combating what she could and accepting what needed t...more

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Jun 24, 2011 Gillian rated it 2 of 5 stars

This caught my eye from the library shelf. I was hoping for a funny “coming of age” book but it was more of a humor-peppered downer. Neither a memoir nor a self-help book it seemed to smirk just a little at those who don’t have a plastic surgeon in their Rolodex, inject face-fillers, take hormones, or go to the gym for an hour a day. She was obviously trying to do some good (along with getting a paycheck) talking about sex, dating, health, finances all to avoid being poor, sick, and alone in you...more

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Mar 03, 2012 Nate rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: dont-own-library-rental, 2012, food-diet-health-brain-medical, non-fiction, self-help, autobiography-biography-memoir, humor, coming-of-age

The author is completely full of herself, lacks self-awareness, and isn't nearly as funny as she believes.

All that being said, the book actually isn't that bad, at least not the first 2/3 of it. The last 1/3 is kind of odd since it turns into random self-help chapters and takes on a tone and direction that the prior 2/3 did not have (from a book that already lacks direction, that is quite an impressive feat).

So I had to skim those parts as they often dragged on with mind-numbing examples of so...more The author is completely full of herself, lacks self-awareness, and isn't nearly as funny as she believes.

All that being said, the book actually isn't that bad, at least not the first 2/3 of it. The last 1/3 is kind of odd since it turns into random self-help chapters and takes on a tone and direction that the prior 2/3 did not have (from a book that already lacks direction, that is quite an impressive feat).

So I had to skim those parts as they often dragged on with mind-numbing examples of some random person in her life. The support she was trying to provide through those examples didn't translate well and left me dreaming about how many more pages were left in the chapter. The book went from having mediocre attempts at wit, to just a flat out borefest.

Tracey is probably a very nice woman, but she thinks she is absolutely hilarious and the bitterness she has for not being recognized for her talent in Hollywood bleeds through the pages more than once. It was akin to an athlete from years past who is now passed their prime and having a hard time comprehending why they never started for the team, and why no one is chasing after them to be associated with the franchise today.

Tracey is indeed funny at times, a chuckle here and there, but she will not have you crying from laughter like she imagines.

Although, through an ironic twist, I did find her constant reminders of how funny and witty she is (she likes to tell you she's funny since you may not notice) to the reader quite humorous. However, I presume her intent at comedy was to have the reader laughing with her, not at her.

The first 2/3 of the book aren't too bad though, and she is definitely worthy of praise for an extremely honest approach to a topic that generally does have quite a bit of spin on it. Her motive was to cut through that spin with pure veracity, and to add some humor along the way.

Had she stuck exclusively to this format, it probably would have been a great book. Unfortunately, she tries to do so much in her writing that the book loses more than it gains from the inclusion of extra topics & tangents. Moreover, she is so busy trying to convince the reader that she is wonderful and funny (something that she believes people in her real life think of her as) that she ends up coming off as an mildly obnoxious and extremely insecure-traits that are not attractive at any age, more or less 50-something.(less)

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Feb 12, 2011 Kristin (Kritters Ramblings) rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: kritter-reviewed-2011

A great read for those who are about to embark on that special birthday that puts them in the second half of their life. Although, I may be a little young to be reading this book, with a mom who has recently entered this new era, I found this book to be informative as to the emotions that she may be dealing with.

A funny account of all the physical and emotional impacts that occur after you hit the hump of the mid life crisis - however it may happen. This book would be a helpful guide to those wh...more

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Mar 17, 2011 Tonya rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2011-reads

I wish once again I hadn't waited so long to read this book! Less than 24 hours later this book is finished! Tracey Jackson has a way of writing exactly what every woman is thinking, come on you know you are! I won't go into every point but the 4 stages of breasts, totally true!!! The spongebob thing, I had to read it outloud to my husband and had to re-read it because I couldn't stop laughing.

I loved the Virginia Woolf quote, "Arrange whatever pieces come your way." I think that is probably the...more

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Feb 03, 2013 Kristine Copley rated it 4 of 5 stars

This book alternates between funny, outrageous, serious, and depressing and I LOVED it. Wendy Rich-Coleman gave me this book for my 50th b-day and I've bought and given it away twice now! Some parts are n/a for me but others will like (she's a believer in face lifts), and other things hit me between the eyes (build and savor your relationship with your parents advice.) Bottom line is the 50 is FINE, and get going on realizing your dreams while you still can!

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Jun 19, 2011 Gina rated it 4 of 5 stars

If you're turning 50 or in your 50's, this book is for you. I wasn't expecting to like this book but boy was I wrong. I loved it. Tracey has such a witty way of describing life at 50 for women, that reading some passages had me rolling with laughter. Tears in my eyes laughter.. Why? Because I related to all of it.

Tracey also offers serious insights too. Lots of things for me to think about. But bottom line what I took away from this book is to live life to its fullest. I highly recommend this b...more

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Jun 11, 2011 Denise rated it 3 of 5 stars

I liked the book, but a few spots I didn't agree with her rationalization for things. She laid down a lot of negatives that comes with mid aged and her thoughts about them. I did think a lot about what she said and feel maybe a new direction may be in store for me. It's just I love my life so much right now. I hate to rock the balance (stay open minded about it). LOL

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Aug 17, 2011 Scputval rated it 2 of 5 stars

So-so. Read and skimmed. Some fluff, some insight.
Her discussions of injectables and plastic surgery made
me feel like we were in a different universe, although
there were other common areas. I was shocked at the
end when I turned to the author's photo - her book
characterizes a person of some maturity, but the photo
looks like a 40-year-old trying to look 20.

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Jun 20, 2011 Doneen rated it 1 of 5 stars

Once again, I got suckered in by a clever title. This author was talking out of both sides of her mouth about aging throughout the entire book (and she was only minimally humorous). In the final chapter, she makes the statement: "Though none of us likes the idea of getting older, the alternative is a lousy one, so we must trundle forward with as much dignity and enthusiasm as we can muster." This, from an author whose longest chapter consisted (in excrutiating detail)of all her plastic surgery a...more

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Apr 12, 2011 Mel rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: read-as-an-adult

The introduction was very amusing. The rest of the book - not so much. It was like spending three hours with a woman who is determined to tell you every intimate detail of her life both good and bad, and who thinks name-dropping and using the word "ain't" makes her seem witty and urbane when it actually makes her crass and self-absorbed.

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Oct 16, 2011 Deborah rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: library, non-fiction, 2011-in-2011, reviews

Why am I reviewing a book that makes you feel like you have to reveal your age to defend your opinion of the book?

I thought this was going to be funny. I guess that's what I get for checking a book out of the library before reading the reviews.

The author can be funny and the beginning of the book was better, but she should have stuck to the humor instead of trying to give advice.

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Nov 25, 2011 Maureen Rue rated it 4 of 5 stars

Thank you for writing this book. I am so tired of the nonsense in the media feeding the overblown egos of middle-aged women and men. I may not have agreed with everything you wrote but it was refreshingly candid and REAL.

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Aug 31, 2012 Liz rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: non-fiction

I picked this one up because I just turned thirty and it's my first aging milestone. I was curious what fifty would feel like. I'm more nervous now than before I picked up the book, that's for sure. But it was funny.

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About Tracey Jackson

The first review of the paperback edition of Between a Rock and a Hot Place is in! Read it here: http://www.seasidebooknook.com/2012/0...

Tracey Jackson is a screenwriter and author who has written over fifteen feature films and fourteen television pilots--including The Other End of the Line, The Guru and Confessions of a Shopaholic--and her first book, Between a Rock and a Hot Place.

Her recent doc...more The first review of the paperback edition of Between a Rock and a Hot Place is in! Read it here: http://www.seasidebooknook.com/2012/0...

Tracey Jackson is a screenwriter and author who has written over fifteen feature films and fourteen television pilots--including The Other End of the Line, The Guru and Confessions of a Shopaholic--and her first book, Between a Rock and a Hot Place.

Her recent documentary, Lucky Ducks, nominated for Best Documentary at the MIAAC Film Festival in 2009, explores issues of parenting and adolescence, following Tracey and her teenage daughter from Park Avenue to Mumbai as they attempt to unravel the complex relationship boomer parents have with their over-indulged teens. Since the film's release, Jackson has been a featured guest on many parenting shows and websites, including MomLogic.com, Mary Talks Money with Mary Caraccioli, and ABC News with Annie Pleshette Murphy.

With the same candidness used to attack parenting in Lucky Ducks, Jackson now takes on aging with her first book, Between a Rock and a Hot Place. By telling themselves fifty is the new thirty, boomers have convinced each other they are getting younger--a myth which Jackson's new book seeks to debunk: "the truth is fifty ain't thirty no matter how you cook the books. It's fifty and it arrives with more baggage than Paris Hilton on a press tour."

While investigating her own life, Jackson, in Between a Rock and a Hot Place, takes us through the many twists and turns on the roller coaster of aging. She is not afraid to tackle the topics of sex, ageism in the workplace, death, health, empty nest, and everything else the years may bring. She makes us laugh hard and think hard as well, and offers ways to lighten the speed bumps along the way. "No one gives women a game plan for a hearty last thirty years," but with Between a Rock and a Hot Place, someone finally does.

Tracey is an avid blogger, whose blog Tracey Talks can be read on her website, TraceyJacksonOnline. She also contributes as a guest blogger to The Huffington Post, The Partnership for a Drug Free America's Decoder blog, and TinyBuddha.com.(less)

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“...if we run toward our fears, they lose their power and ultimately disappear"

"I think this is one of the giant lessons in adapting to age without losing your mind: we must let go of what was and begin accepting what is"

"'fate loves the fearless.' There is no better time to be fearless than in your fifties; if you really put your mind and your energy into it, you can make amazing things happen.” — 1 person liked it

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