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Divorcing a Parent

4.09  ·  Rating Details ·  23 Ratings  ·  5 Reviews
Free Yourself from the Past and Live the Life You've Always Wanted

In this compassionate, intelligent book, renowned author and counselor Beverly Engel offers readers a serious, step-by-step guide to freeing themselves from an abusive relationship with a parent.
Paperback, 194 pages
Published June 6th 1996 by Ballantine Books (first published May 1990)
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D. Jennifer
Oct 22, 2009 D. Jennifer rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: self-development
Couldn't find this Beverly Engel book as it's long out of print. Finally bit the bullet and purchased it from and am pleased I did.

If you know Engel, you're familiar with her straightforward, easy to 'hear' words on some of the more difficult topics of abuse, domestic violence and how to recover. She has published so many books on the subject of abuse, and healing and recovery - and she writes without a lot of mumbo jumbo. Just what you need to hear to start feeling better.

This book has
Sam Dye
Jun 18, 2012 Sam Dye rated it really liked it
It is very well organized and filled with case history examples. A quote: "Just as in a troubled marriage, both people must be willing to work on the relationship in order for it to be mended. Unfortunately, many parents are so stubborn or so dysfunctional that they refuse to look at themselves and refuse to change."
The orientation of this book is for adult children whose parent(s) continually intrude in their life and demean them. "The purpose of divorcing your parent is to take of yourself, t
Rose Mendoza
May 12, 2015 Rose Mendoza rated it liked it
I really enjoyed how it was organized. Talking about why it can be necessary to divorce your parent and also letting you know that it is okay if you decide to remain in the relationship. I recently let go of my mother because around her I was emotionally stunted in my growth and I needed the time away.
The only part I didn't like was the releasing your anger part. Physicalizing anger doesn't seem healthy to me. But other than that, I really enjoyed reading it. It helped me make a more informed de
Feb 20, 2011 Brenda rated it it was amazing
Shelves: self-help
This book truly helped me to realize how toxic my mother and father were, it was esp. hard with my mother,to let go of her and the hope of a relationship, but this book was a great resource and opened my eyes.
Janani Iyer
Feb 10, 2012 Janani Iyer rated it liked it
It is so true that, when our life's experiences are different from others, it is tough for us to empathize. There are times when we don't understand when a patient ,friend or colleague talks about their toxic parents. I am happy I read this book, I will not be giving wrong advice to traumatized children (turned adults). There is an ancient sanskrit saying that says " Kuputro buhuto santi, kumata eko na bhavti"---which translates to "there can be bad children but no bad mothers". Well this statem ...more
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Beverly Engel has been a psychotherapist for thirty years, specializing in the areas of abuse recovery, relationships, women’s issues and sexuality. She is also the best-selling author of 20 self-help books, many of which have been featured on national television and radio programs (Oprah, CNN, Ricki Lake, Starting Over) as well as national print media (O Magazine, Cosmopolitan, Ladies Home Journa ...more
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“Why isn't there a commandment to "honor thy children" or at least one to "not abuse thy children"? The notion that we must honor our parents causes many people to bury their real feelings and set aside their own needs in order to have a relationship with people they would otherwise not associate with. Parents, like anyone else, need to earn respect and honor, and honoring parents who are negative and abusive is not only impossible but extremely self-abusive. Perhaps, as with anything else, honoring our parents starts with honoring ourselves. For many adult children, honoring themselves means not having anything to do with one or both of their parents.” 140 likes
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