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66th out of 1,336 books
—
4,913 voters
Modelland (Modelland #1)
by
Tyra Banks
No one gets in without being asked. And with her untamable hair, large forehead, and gawky body, Tookie De La Crème isn’t expecting an invitation. Modelland—the exclusive, mysterious place on top of the mountain—never dares to make an appearance in her dreams.
But someone has plans for Tookie. Before she can blink her mismatched eyes, Tookie finds herself in the very place...more
But someone has plans for Tookie. Before she can blink her mismatched eyes, Tookie finds herself in the very place...more
Hardcover, 576 pages
Published
September 13th 2011
by Random House Children's Books
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Three stars? Three stars, Wigs??? You say???
This book. Where do I even start?
I picked up this book because of the second to last episode of America's Next Top Model all star season, which featured the priceless Modelland photoshoot which gave us these gifs:
And I was intrigued. I then further got incentive when my friend Kelcey and I decided to challenge ourselves to get through this almost 600 page book.
I
am
so
glad
this happened.
Why?
Because reading this book is like this:
Oh. Trust me. This book i...more
This book. Where do I even start?
I picked up this book because of the second to last episode of America's Next Top Model all star season, which featured the priceless Modelland photoshoot which gave us these gifs:
And I was intrigued. I then further got incentive when my friend Kelcey and I decided to challenge ourselves to get through this almost 600 page book.
I
am
so
glad
this happened.
Why?
Because reading this book is like this:
Oh. Trust me. This book i...more
188 likes · like · see review
view all 62 comments
Mar 23, 2012
Steph Sinclair
marked it as due-to-reviews-lost-interest
WTF is this?!
Tyra, Trya, Tyra... Oh you. Lol.
Let us do a bit of pre-reviewing shall we?
No one gets in without being asked. And with her untamable hair, large forehead, and gawky body, Tookie De La Crème isn’t expecting an invitation.
Tookie? Tookie?! Is that seriously the most creative name she could thing of? Then she had the nerve to tack on "De La Crème." For what, Tyra? Because if her "large forehead, and gawky body" doesn't drive the point home, her name will? Please stop while you're ahead...more
Tyra, Trya, Tyra... Oh you. Lol.
Let us do a bit of pre-reviewing shall we?
No one gets in without being asked. And with her untamable hair, large forehead, and gawky body, Tookie De La Crème isn’t expecting an invitation.
Tookie? Tookie?! Is that seriously the most creative name she could thing of? Then she had the nerve to tack on "De La Crème." For what, Tyra? Because if her "large forehead, and gawky body" doesn't drive the point home, her name will? Please stop while you're ahead...more
106 likes · like · see review
Feb 20, 2013
Blythe
marked it as will-not-read
Oh, look! I found a gif of Tyra writing Modelland!
93 likes · like · see review
Jun 07, 2012
Ashleigh Paige
rated it
1 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
No one! Please, don't read it. I beg you.
Recommended to Ashleigh Paige by:
Cillian Beyond Birthday
Also appears on The YA Kitten. I received an ARC for review via Amazon Vine.
(This may become a new favorite of mine.)
192 pages. I made it exactly one-third of the way through Modelland before I reached the point where I couldn't take it anymore and put the book down for the final time.
I knew what I was in for from the beginning. If the first thing the main character does when the novel begins is squirt whipped cream into her mouth from a can as she lays on a school hallway floor, it's not going...more
(This may become a new favorite of mine.)
192 pages. I made it exactly one-third of the way through Modelland before I reached the point where I couldn't take it anymore and put the book down for the final time.
I knew what I was in for from the beginning. If the first thing the main character does when the novel begins is squirt whipped cream into her mouth from a can as she lays on a school hallway floor, it's not going...more
43 likes · like · see review
This is the worst book I’ve ever read. Worst. The worst book. I’ve read The Sword of Shannara and Skye O'Malley. This is the worst book. I can’t even believe this book exists. It is about . . .
Well, imagine if Effie Trinket wrote a book about Bella Swan that took place in David Lynch’s brain, using as literary reference the Harry Potter series and the Uglies series.
It is bad and somewhat horrifying at the same time. And while both Skye O’Malley and this book had some creepy abuse of women and g...more
Well, imagine if Effie Trinket wrote a book about Bella Swan that took place in David Lynch’s brain, using as literary reference the Harry Potter series and the Uglies series.
It is bad and somewhat horrifying at the same time. And while both Skye O’Malley and this book had some creepy abuse of women and g...more
60 likes · like · see review
Finished 9/22
It's going to take me some time to pull my thoughts together for this one. On one side, I am horrified, and on the other...I just am not quite sure what Tyra was even going for. Comedy? Satire? Horror? Science fiction? Fantasy? She uses every dead trope and cliche in the fantasy genre, including descriptions and metaphors. Her world-building is a wreck (how the heck do you have a completely consumer-driven society, where the products are all expensive designer bags and clothes and...more
It's going to take me some time to pull my thoughts together for this one. On one side, I am horrified, and on the other...I just am not quite sure what Tyra was even going for. Comedy? Satire? Horror? Science fiction? Fantasy? She uses every dead trope and cliche in the fantasy genre, including descriptions and metaphors. Her world-building is a wreck (how the heck do you have a completely consumer-driven society, where the products are all expensive designer bags and clothes and...more
28 likes · like · see review
So I suddenly realized I hadn’t reviewed this, despite having finished it two weeks ago, and… I just don’t know if I’m going to be able to manage anything coherent.
Imagine you handed me a rotten fish and said, “Review this.” Well clearly, it’s a rotten fish. What can you say about it that isn’t immediately obvious? Any attempt to expound upon the clear, dead, smelly rotten fishness of the thing is just overkill.
But! Let it never be said that I don’t at least do my damndest to impart my opinion...more
Imagine you handed me a rotten fish and said, “Review this.” Well clearly, it’s a rotten fish. What can you say about it that isn’t immediately obvious? Any attempt to expound upon the clear, dead, smelly rotten fishness of the thing is just overkill.
But! Let it never be said that I don’t at least do my damndest to impart my opinion...more
36 likes · like · see review
This little box is asking me what I think. To be honest I have no idea how in the world to explian that. The only thing going through my head is a loud and resounding "WHAT?"
I mean, Tookie De La Creme? With a name like that, you can just tell that this novel is NOT going to be pretty.
Some predictions?
- There will be a head bitch model who is super pretty and skinny and well loved/hated
- There will be a ridicoulously hot guys who falls for the ugly protagonist rather than the pretty skinny bit...more
I mean, Tookie De La Creme? With a name like that, you can just tell that this novel is NOT going to be pretty.
Some predictions?
- There will be a head bitch model who is super pretty and skinny and well loved/hated
- There will be a ridicoulously hot guys who falls for the ugly protagonist rather than the pretty skinny bit...more
10 likes · like · see review
Update: Remember her audience appeals to 12-15 year old tweens.
Many of the reviewers passed through this awkward phase in life and probably can not relate to the story's message.
* * *
Original Review:
I admit, I am a self-professed America's Next Top Model fan hooked since season one. I find the model world and teens everywhere wanting this quest fascinating. Therefore, sit back, open the book, and enter the realm of Modelland. Tyra Banks delivers a fantasy tale with the same creative gusto whi...more
Many of the reviewers passed through this awkward phase in life and probably can not relate to the story's message.
* * *
Original Review:
I admit, I am a self-professed America's Next Top Model fan hooked since season one. I find the model world and teens everywhere wanting this quest fascinating. Therefore, sit back, open the book, and enter the realm of Modelland. Tyra Banks delivers a fantasy tale with the same creative gusto whi...more
7 likes · like · see review
Oh wow!
This is the most badly written book i have ever EVER read in my entire life. I honestly don't know how it got published, but oh well... it has, and I have read it!
It was tacky - she describes it as "camp" but the only this i found 'camp' is the gay as anything school teacher at the Modelland Academy, the rest is just ridiculously mindless and my 4 year old daughter could absolutely conjure up better names for anything. The names of the 4 sectors of the town will give you an idea of what i...more
This is the most badly written book i have ever EVER read in my entire life. I honestly don't know how it got published, but oh well... it has, and I have read it!
It was tacky - she describes it as "camp" but the only this i found 'camp' is the gay as anything school teacher at the Modelland Academy, the rest is just ridiculously mindless and my 4 year old daughter could absolutely conjure up better names for anything. The names of the 4 sectors of the town will give you an idea of what i...more
8 likes · like · see review
I just read the excerpt and honestly, I've never read anything this bad.The writing is so bad, it makes Stephanie Mayers look...good. It pains me to say that. Like, legitimately, I'm getting chest pains writing this.
The excerpt sort of reminded me of the the first time I saw the Pawggles commercial. You know...those stuffed animal things that turn into slippers? The less awesome version of pillow pets? No? Well here
https://www.pawggles.com/images/pawgg...
(sorry, the HTML thing confuses me)
I'm s...more
The excerpt sort of reminded me of the the first time I saw the Pawggles commercial. You know...those stuffed animal things that turn into slippers? The less awesome version of pillow pets? No? Well here
https://www.pawggles.com/images/pawgg...
(sorry, the HTML thing confuses me)
I'm s...more
May 06, 2013
Christina (A Reader of Fictions)
rated it
1 of 5 stars
Recommended to Christina (A Reader of Fictions) by:
Steph Sinclair
Shelves:
sadie-hawkins
I've never done a vlog review before, and I doubt I'll do many. However, I thought it might be the best way for me to get my thoughts across for this particular book. I'm not going to type out all or most of what I said, but I will give you a quick paragraph's summation of my general thoughts on Modelland, as well as some additional feedback.
Honestly, Modelland was not as bad as I was expecting, but this doesn't mean it was good. The world it's set in makes no actual sense, as there don't really...more
Honestly, Modelland was not as bad as I was expecting, but this doesn't mean it was good. The world it's set in makes no actual sense, as there don't really...more
4 likes · like · see review
Oct 28, 2011
Taneika (Flipping Through The Pages...)
marked it as will-never-read
UPDATE 6/10/11
My stepmum found the THEMESONG to this wretched book. It bought tears to my eyes because it gave me a headache. No kidding.
This will make your ears bleed
My stepmum and I have this theory that this song has subliminal messages because after hearing this song, Kelly wanted to read the book - honestly, this song could be used as a torture method and the person who was tortured would spend the rest of their life in a mental institution.
UPDATE 28/10/11
My stepmum wrote her first review...more
My stepmum found the THEMESONG to this wretched book. It bought tears to my eyes because it gave me a headache. No kidding.
This will make your ears bleed
My stepmum and I have this theory that this song has subliminal messages because after hearing this song, Kelly wanted to read the book - honestly, this song could be used as a torture method and the person who was tortured would spend the rest of their life in a mental institution.
UPDATE 28/10/11
My stepmum wrote her first review...more
4 likes · like · see review
I can't read the rest. It made my brain hurt. I got to chapter 5 and couldn't read anymore. Wow.
5 likes · like · see review
Aug 07, 2011
The Holy Terror
marked it as probably-shouldn-t-read
OMG, THIS IS GOING TO BE FIERCE.
6 likes · like · see review
Oct 03, 2011
Laura The Book Ninja
marked it as not-going-to-read
Oh. Okay.
WHAT THE FREX IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE??
Okay, so first it's Duff, now we got Tyra Banks?
I'm sorry, but stick to your day job.
And Tookie De La Creme? What is this girl? A Desert?
...And after reading the first chapter online for free, um....well it makes a stephenie meyer book look like a masterpiece.
No kidding, I might be being harsh, but really, go see for yourself:
Here, If you dare
And I guess it was about time some pop-head decided to write a Hunger Games/Uglies rip-off.
...Int...more
WHAT THE FREX IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE??
Okay, so first it's Duff, now we got Tyra Banks?
I'm sorry, but stick to your day job.
And Tookie De La Creme? What is this girl? A Desert?
...And after reading the first chapter online for free, um....well it makes a stephenie meyer book look like a masterpiece.
No kidding, I might be being harsh, but really, go see for yourself:
Here, If you dare
And I guess it was about time some pop-head decided to write a Hunger Games/Uglies rip-off.
...Int...more
7 likes · like · see review
So I found this book in a collection of horror (and some other genres but I firmly believe that Modelland is a horror book) and oh my god. It is going to give me nightmares. (view spoiler)
That's not the worst.
I feel like I have been in the Tyrant's head and I never want to go back again. But I'll probably read the sequel too because this is a car crash and you can't stop looking at it....more
That's not the worst.
I feel like I have been in the Tyrant's head and I never want to go back again. But I'll probably read the sequel too because this is a car crash and you can't stop looking at it....more
3 likes · like · see review
It's been over a year. It's time for me to throw in the towel on this one.
Before I write this review, I would like to address the idea that a person cannot review something without finishing it. In some cases, that might be true. Let's face it, a great mystery doesn't really show its colors until the end.
But in this case, I would have to disagree.
To make an analogy, let's say I went to a restaurant where I was promised the most incredible half-steak of all time. This would be the ultimate in del...more
Before I write this review, I would like to address the idea that a person cannot review something without finishing it. In some cases, that might be true. Let's face it, a great mystery doesn't really show its colors until the end.
But in this case, I would have to disagree.
To make an analogy, let's say I went to a restaurant where I was promised the most incredible half-steak of all time. This would be the ultimate in del...more
5 likes · like · see review
Oh, Tookie, I never wagered your lip nookie...
In your eyes is the only place I wanna lookie...
You've taught me 'bout loving and giving, I was rookie...
You're so pure and sweet. And now I'm hookie...
On Tookieeeeee!
Tookie de la Creme, ktorej na upútanie pozornosti nepomôže ani ľahnúť si na zem uprostred školskej chodby. Nečudo, veď je to taká špata, jedno oko inej farby ako druhé...!
A práve Tookie sa stane jednou z vyvolených študentiek prestížnej modelingovej školy Modelland, ktorej 7 absolventi...more
In your eyes is the only place I wanna lookie...
You've taught me 'bout loving and giving, I was rookie...
You're so pure and sweet. And now I'm hookie...
On Tookieeeeee!
Tookie de la Creme, ktorej na upútanie pozornosti nepomôže ani ľahnúť si na zem uprostred školskej chodby. Nečudo, veď je to taká špata, jedno oko inej farby ako druhé...!
A práve Tookie sa stane jednou z vyvolených študentiek prestížnej modelingovej školy Modelland, ktorej 7 absolventi...more
2 likes · like · see review
Read This Review & More Like It At Ageless Pages Reviews
The biggest surprise of Modelland is that it deserves any stars. It may only deserve one, but that’s more than I expected after reading the sample chapter.
In the interest of full disclosure, I read this book because I knew it would be terribly, hilariously bad. Just life-alteringly awful. I will never again criticize Scott Westerfeld for a lack of subtlety in his moral, nor Jackson Pearce for her stilted writing. Modelland’s flaws are...more
The biggest surprise of Modelland is that it deserves any stars. It may only deserve one, but that’s more than I expected after reading the sample chapter.
In the interest of full disclosure, I read this book because I knew it would be terribly, hilariously bad. Just life-alteringly awful. I will never again criticize Scott Westerfeld for a lack of subtlety in his moral, nor Jackson Pearce for her stilted writing. Modelland’s flaws are...more
4 likes · like · see review
I was really excited when I learned Tyra Banks was "writing" a novel. I am a huge fan of America's Next Top Model, and I hoped this would be a book along the lines of Lauren Conrad's LA Candy series. Kind of an insider's view of the modeling industry told in a silly young adult style. Instead, I slogged my way through 77 pages of Modelland's pseudo-sci-fi/dystopian mess before giving up.
I wanted to enjoy this book, but knowing that it was going to be 500+ pages of Tyra drivel, I couldn't handle...more
I wanted to enjoy this book, but knowing that it was going to be 500+ pages of Tyra drivel, I couldn't handle...more
Honestly, before you assume anything I NEVER rate any books a 1. I'm actually quite giving when it comes to reviews and usually love books people hated. So giving this book an 1 star rating..I really didn't enjoy it.
First off. The name Tookie de la creme...seriously? Okay I know the name of the main character isn't big to the reader but as a writer I know I always spent tooons of time picking the perfect name for my characters. Come on Tyra, she's already described as am girl with untamable hair...more
First off. The name Tookie de la creme...seriously? Okay I know the name of the main character isn't big to the reader but as a writer I know I always spent tooons of time picking the perfect name for my characters. Come on Tyra, she's already described as am girl with untamable hair...more
11 likes · like · see review
I haven't even finished this book, but I can tell you how awful it is. The plot is non-existent, Tyra goes on long digressions all the time, the sentences barely link up to each other, and this dystopian society simply cannot exist. I'm 90% sure no editor looked at the manuscript. I can't even believe that this is the result of five years of work.
That being said, I love this book because of how bad it is! It's like watching The Room or an Ed Wood movie: nothing is right, nothing even comes close...more
That being said, I love this book because of how bad it is! It's like watching The Room or an Ed Wood movie: nothing is right, nothing even comes close...more
Well, it hardly seems sporting to kick a wounded puppy, now does it? But oh my god, this book was beyond bad. It was beyond Showgirls it's-so-bad-it's-good bad. It was almost I-can't-possibly-finsih-this-crap bad.
Now don't get me wrong, I loves me some Tyra. I watch ANTM religiously. And the spin-offs. I'm loosing all street cred here aren't I? I wanted to read this book and be able to say, "Hey, leave Tyra alone, it's actually not as bad as people are making out."
But, dear lord, it is that b...more
Now don't get me wrong, I loves me some Tyra. I watch ANTM religiously. And the spin-offs. I'm loosing all street cred here aren't I? I wanted to read this book and be able to say, "Hey, leave Tyra alone, it's actually not as bad as people are making out."
But, dear lord, it is that b...more
1 like · like · see review
10 Feb - I finished this last night before bed, then read (or skimmed) the monstrously oversized "thanks" at the end, in which TyTy mentions that the original manuscript was over a thousand pages. Dear lord. Anyway, I'm rating this a 3 because, despite its absurdity level, occasionally hideous grammar (seriously, a your/you're error made it through editing), and general WTFness, I enjoyed reading this book. It is too long and should probably have been chopped by about 200 pages as well as rinsed...more
2 likes · like · see review
I've read the excerpt and it's a fun read...I've just pre-ordered the book!!!
4 likes · like · see review
As a preface: I know that there are soooo many people that think that this book is such a trip that it's rather unreadable and they hate it. I actually completely understand this viewpoint, and I don't like the book for it's... Well a lot of things that one would classically write a book for. It really seems like a piece that someone would write, and then post to the internet, not a published book. That being said...
This book amazes me. It's not the story, or anything, but the fact that you can...more
This book amazes me. It's not the story, or anything, but the fact that you can...more
6 likes · like · see review
All right... are you ready? Here we go.
Now lets review our options. i would rather....
a) eat my own feet
b) Sit and watch the movie Green Lantern twice in a row.
c) enroll myself into a advanced mathematics intensive course
than read Modelland again. Anything to undo the memory of reading such book !!
Modelland is..shocking. how did they even allow it to be printed?? are they trying to kill us? a new form of slow poison? the plot is just outright flat, prosaic and so shallow.
To be honest, i though...more
Now lets review our options. i would rather....
a) eat my own feet
b) Sit and watch the movie Green Lantern twice in a row.
c) enroll myself into a advanced mathematics intensive course
than read Modelland again. Anything to undo the memory of reading such book !!
Modelland is..shocking. how did they even allow it to be printed?? are they trying to kill us? a new form of slow poison? the plot is just outright flat, prosaic and so shallow.
To be honest, i though...more
2 likes · like · see review
My thoughts as I'm reading:
Dear god, Cats are talking..
How can such an awesome person write this?!
The Likee sisters give me an even worse headache than the story.
Okay I give..I hate doing this.. so much.. but I'm refusing o finish it. I tried. I promise I did but it was torture. Really it was.
It was so disappointing. I was so excited to read this. Tyra Banks is absolutely amazing in everything but book writing. So I finish on page 326. More than halfway done. Goodbye book. Thank god.
Dear god, Cats are talking..
How can such an awesome person write this?!
The Likee sisters give me an even worse headache than the story.
Okay I give..I hate doing this.. so much.. but I'm refusing o finish it. I tried. I promise I did but it was torture. Really it was.
It was so disappointing. I was so excited to read this. Tyra Banks is absolutely amazing in everything but book writing. So I finish on page 326. More than halfway done. Goodbye book. Thank god.
1 like · like · see review
Sep 26, 2011
S.J. Kincaid
added it
I've only read the first chapter. IMO, this promises to be the most terrifying dystopian of all.
| topics | posts | views | last activity | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| ONTD Book Club: July - Modelland | 82 | 169 | Jul 26, 2012 09:57pm | |
| Goodreads Librari...: 5-stars Review Spammers | 15 | 260 | Oct 09, 2011 11:46am |
Tyra Lynne Banks is an American supermodel, television personality, talk show host, actress, businessperson and singer. She became famous first as a model in Paris, Milan, London, Tokyo, and New York, but television appearances made her even more so. She is known best as hostess/judge of the reality television show America's Next Top Model since its 2003 debut, and is currently hosting her own Day...more
More about Tyra Banks...
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2 trivia questions
More quizzes & trivia...
“Love is an excuse to be stupid”
—
2 people liked it
“He followed the sweet scent not of blood orange, but of the pancreas and thymus glands that lived within one particular platinum-headed Unica, and he resumed his trek to Modelland.”
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1 person liked it
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