Journey to Virginland: Epistle 1

So I have entered and lost the giveaway of this book for the second time. But now I see that this book is up for giveaway for the third time. So before entering the giveaway (for the third time), I decided to have a look at the rating and reviews of this book.

So I have entered and lost the giveaway of this book for the second time. But now I see that this book is up for giveaway for the third time. So before entering the giveaway (for the third time), I decided to have a look at the rating and reviews of this book.

“ Enter ONLY IF you love 1. reading a book with highly advanced vocabulary, 2. thinking all along, 3. doing a very serious reading (it’s NOT a light read), 4. grappling with philosophical concepts and your philosophy of life and morality, 5. reading ferocious religious satire that will disrespect and destroy your religious identity, and 6. would love avant-garde that turns upside down the conventions of the novel.

This is NOT a traditional novel with a smooth or chronological narrative. You will need to read the book twice. YOU WILL BE EXTREMELY DISAPPOINTED IF LOOKING FOR A MASS-MARKET, USER-FRIENDLY, SMOOTH READING. If that's the case, DO NOT ENTER, do not even bother. Some college education would be a plus.”

I may add that this giveaway is listed by the author himself, so that boasting or praise or warning (whatever it is) about this book comes from author himself.

The author’s name is Armen Melikian (go ahead and click it, see it for yourself what I’m about to say) and he has given two ratings. Two ratings to two different edition of his own book and obviously the rating is 5 stars for both. There is one review he has written of his own book which comprises of praises by critics, that’s a good thing.
As I am scrolling down, I see someone looking exactly like the author among his fans. Next second my doubt is cleared as the update beside it says:

“Armen Melikian became a fan of goodreads author Armen Melikian”

>> Manny Rayner has written a book that consists of collection of best reviews he has written on goodreads. He has rated his book 5 stars and has written an excellent review that consists of praises (and abuses) from various reviewers and the latter part is how to get published if you’re deciding the same thing or how he got it published right.
But he has also rated the ebook edition of same book with 3 stars calling it “cheap and tacky PDF edition”. What I definitely see is humour in that.

>> Kat Lowe on the contrary to both she has not rated her book but has written a great review which starts as:

“If you are looking for the Midwest Book Review of Dream Cat, I have demoted it to the end of this post. (No disrespect intended, just hated that it appeared that I was giving my own book 5 stars.)

Since this is goodreads, where I exist primarily as a reader, and only secondarily as an author, I would like to post some of my thoughts and intentions in writing this book.”

>> Caris O’Malley has written a book called The Egg Said Nothing. What I know about Caris, Dan (a goodreads friend) writes in his review of Caris’s book “Caris O’Malley happens to be fairly prominent reviewer on goodreads and doesn’t even have an author profile. Pretty sneaky.”
In an interview with Dan, what Caris says about not entering goodreads author program is:

“ I try to keep my established identity on GR to the greatest extent possible. You may have noticed that I’m not a “GoodReads Author.” This is intentional. I want to hold on to all the aspects of GR that I love. If people want to talk to me about my book, that’s great. But I want to be their friend, too. I refuse to let GR just turn into another promotional tool. It’s too important to me.”

What we have before us, are Armen and Caris, who are extreme of the opposite sides, while both Manny and Kat lies somewhere in between.
I know that authors enter the goodreads author program with first and foremost reason to promote and spread words about their upcoming or published book and thus they want to make their book visible to the world involved in reading. But there is a point, where one has to stop and let the readers decide what they are worth. If one tries to cross that line, it means one thing for me, that you are going to lose your integrity and end up mocking the relationship that an author builds with reader.
I am writing this whole thing, because I want to know how this thing can be rationalized/justified. I am fairly sure that what Armen has done cannot be justified. But still, I would love to hear from everyone and you are most welcomed if you’re an author.

A FEW WORDS OF PRAISE FOR THIS REVIEW AND ITS REVIEWER
As you have seen this is an amazing review written by everyone’s favourite reviwer, Nilesh. Nilesh has worked very hard in writing this review, collecting material from various sources. Though Nilesh has not used advanced vocabulary like Armen, but still this is a thought-provoking and must have made you think all along while reading.
People are crazy about him and his reviews which are excellent as usual and this is evident from all the stats on goodreads like best reviewer, top reviewer, most followed and top reader, which are all ruled by him, well, the person I’m talking is not Nilesh but rather Stephen... but Nilesh is pretty good too (inspired by Mike Reynolds).

P.S. I’m going to read Caris’s book at the end of this month.
P.P.S. The five sparkling and glowing stars you see at the top of this review is not for this book but for this amazing and brilliant piece of writing.

Description: Some reasons for NOT reading this book:
1. The author caricatures the Holy of Holies of all religions. Jerusalem is Penisalem.

2. The author caricatures the holy of holies of the ideology and the prime representatives of the American empire.The USA is Satanland.

3. The book is experimental literature. Inverts on its head the conventions of the novel. It is Dog Lit, written by a dog who disbelieves in the opium of literature.

4. This book is for "anarchists," "atheists," "terrorists," "criminals," "satanists," "moslems," "subverters," "drug dealers," "the homeless," "the stateless," "the gypsies," "the thieves," "the blacks," "traitors," "whores," "conspirators," "co-conspirators," "co-coconspirators," and... "real Americans."

5. One more reason NOT to read this book: The latest reviews assert persuasively that this book is rubbish. Don't believe it? Read it for yourself:

"A conceited attempt to imitate Salman Rushie and others. Pretentious, self-congratulatory rubbish, e-mailed to Early Reviewers along with a poorly made YouTube marketing video. Shameful. The positive reviews of this novel have only re-iterated the points put forth in marketing documents, as no one yet has had the courage to stand and criticize it. This book is, quite simply, a vainglorious writer presenting mundane social commentary with a soaring vocabulary."

While it is a fact that
a. The author has never read Salman Rushdie, and doesn't intend to read him anytime soon, because as a citizen of Satanland, his domain is first and foremost Satanland, not Allahland or Ayatollahland, and as such, he wouldn't feel a particular pleasure by demonizing Allah or Ayatollah, as the ideologues of His Holiness Diabolam Diabolum do basking under the sun of every literary crap that criticizes their ideological enemies. Rather, the author would not deprive himself from the intense pleasure of demonizing Satanland and its self-righteous and all-knowledgeable ideologues.

b. The author has made a "cheap" YouTube video because he is neither a member of the Satanic Plutocracy (he doesn't own a bank), nor is he a successful capitalist investor or an inheritor of wealth or the means of producing wealth. Shame on him! Inferior creature!

c. The reviewer has never received any marketing material, therefore he has no way of knowing if others have. And the fact is none of the winners of LibraryThing have received any (but they will receive it henceforth!) And that none of the other reviewers of the book have used nothing from the marketing material, but have expressed their genuine experiences in reading this book.

d. The reviewer is a liar and an underhanded one whose sole aim is to discredit an author and destroy his ranking, because this writer destroys the ideological hegemony of his sacrosanct beliefs in capitalism, democracy, and the rest... (and brings a new voice in literature that he wants to suffocate—a voice that sounds bizarre to him, since it is a nuclear bomb in the ass of Satan's Grand Narrative). This wouldn't have been as insulting to the reviewer, of course, if the author's knowledge of English was inferior to his.

e. The reviewer thinks he is more intelligent than the editors of major book review magazines and most of the readers and reviewers of the book, as well as all the judges of the 7 awards the author has won in Satanland, and feels a personal sense of responsibility to alert everyone to the prime danger of wasting their time by reading this book.

Nevertheless, we should believe in his genuine remarks, as "where there's smoke, there's fire" says the conventional wisdom.

Therefore, it behooves everyone to read excerpts on author's website BEFORE entering into something that might prove to be after all a waste of precious investment time. http://www.JourneyToVirginland.com

"They call me dog. Don’t ask who. Them. all of them."

"Kill the dog!
Sex is outlawed in Virginland."

Enter ONLY IF you love 1. reading a book with highly advanced vocabulary, 2. thinking all along, 3. doing a very serious reading (its NOT a light read), 4. grappling with philosophical concepts and your philosophy of life and morality, 5. reading ferocious religious satire that will disrespect and destroy your religious identity, and 6. would love avant-garde that turns upside down the conventions of the no

Enter ONLY IF you love 1. reading a book with highly advanced vocabulary, 2. thinking all along, 3. doing a very serious reading (its NOT a light read), 4. grappling with philosophical concepts and your philosophy of life and morality, 5. reading ferocious religious satire that will disrespect and destroy your religious identity, and 6. would love avant-garde that turns upside down the conventions of the novel.

This is NOT a traditional novel with a smooth or chronological narrative. You will need to read the book twice. YOU WILL BE EXTREMELY DISAPPOINTED IF LOOKING FOR A MASS-MARKET, USER-FRIENDLY, SMOOTH READING. If that's the case, DO NOT ENTER, do not even bother. Some college education would be a plus.