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Wuthering Bites

3.36 of 5 stars 3.36  ·  rating details  ·  465 ratings  ·  70 reviews
When a young orphan named Heathcliff is brought to Wuthering Heights by the manor's owner, Mr. Earnshaw, rumors abound. Yet the truth is more complicated than anyone could guess. Heathcliff's mother was a member of a gypsy band that roamed the English countryside, slaying vampires o keep citizens safe. But his father was a vampire.
Kindle Edition, 352 pages
Published September 1st 2010 by Kensington Books
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from the back cover (boldface mine):

when a young orphan named heathcliff is brought to wuthering heights by the manor's owner, mr. earnshaw, rumors abound. yet the truth is more complicated than anyone could guess. heathcliff's mother was a member of a gypsy band that roamed the english countryside, slaying vampires to keep citizens safe. but his father was a vampire. now, even as heathcliff gallantly fights the monsters who roam the moors in order to protect beautiful, spirited catherine earnsh
Aug 17, 2012 Misfit marked it as will-never-read  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: monster-mash
First, READ WUTHERING HEIGHTS. If you have not read it in a while or you have never read it, it is pretty much a prerequisite to this story since the two are so closely intertwined.

That said. This book really surprised me. I was really more drawn in by the clever title than anything else, but in all honesty I was really quite shocked at how much I actually enjoyed it. Wuthering Heights, is a beautiful, dark, haunting tale full of Gothic torment and mystery...quite clearly the perfect setting fo
This book is terrible. After reading the blurb I thought this would be an interesting adaptation of the original text. What it doesn't tell you is that most of this book consists of the original, with a few new paragraphs from the author, and some small edits that refer to vampires. On top of this, the vampires are treated as humorous rather than Gothic monsters. Rather than seeing Heathcliff as a fearsome monster, I was greeted with a 'beastie', what the society calls a vampire. It all felt lik ...more
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Erin O'Riordan
I didn't enjoy this mash-up as much I liked Jane Slayre: The Literary Classic with a Blood-Sucking Twist, which I also recently read. It was a fun read, but the vampire elements could have been incorporated in a more thorough way. Some of them, especially toward the end, felt very tacked-on. In a really good mash-up, we don't see the seams.
The mash-up genre, for better or worse (or much, much worse) is obviously here to stay. So seeing yet another entry into it no longer provokes a reflexive winch of pain from classic purists. This one, on the whole, isn’t so objectionable, perhaps because Brontë’s original work leaned so heavily towards melodrama that the addition of supernatural creatures doesn’t make it any more ludicrous.

Consider this: we are meant to accept that a well-born gentleman brings home a ruffian child of uncertain p
Kristi Lynn
I have read Wuthering Heights. I enjoyed it. So beings I like Vampires, I figured with this book I'd get the best of both worlds wrong! I was bored! I MADE myself finish this book. If you read the original, then you most likely had the same ideas as to where this book could have gone, but it didn't! Read the real Wuthering Heights, it's better.
Jennifer Warnix
I found this version better than the original. I guess because the characters in the original were so obtuse. The vampire twist made more sense to the characters once added into their overall personalities. I really enjoyed this version and laughed out loud on occasion.
Georgiana 1792
I mash-up? Letto uno, letti tutti!

L’esperienza (non del tutto negativa, direi, anzi!) fatta con Pride and Prejudice and Zombies mi ha portata a voler leggere altri mash-up per verificare a che punto i contaminatori si fossero spinti ad insozzare i capolavori della letteratura.
Seth Grahame-Smith prevedeva che dopo il suo primo tentativo collagistico altri avrebbero intrapreso la sua proficua strada. Ed infatti così è stato.
Devo dire che Pride and Prejudice and Zombies mi aveva gradevolmente sor
I really wanted to love this but sadly I didn't. The original Wuthering Heights is one of my all-time favourite books and being a big fan of the vampire genre, I had high hopes for Wuthering Bites. In theory, it's a story that should work well as a vampire novel but for me, it fell somewhat flat. It started off ok but after about 80 or so pages I was really starting to struggle and the story was on something of a downward spiral by then. What I found surprising is that the book actually consists ...more
Where do I begin? This book rather surprised me. I was shocked at how much I actually enjoyed it in the end. "Wuthering Heights" is probably one of my favorite novels of all time.. one of the best classics of all time, in my opinion. It is a beautiful, dark, haunting tale in itself.

"Wuthering Bites"- while I honestly thought the title was a bit cheesy, and I'm sure the title was given as a marketing ploy and in order to try and stay as closely matched with it's 'original' wasn't near as awful o
Not bad, not great.
It's a little dangerous to pick the amazing story of Wuthering Heights to base one's novel on it.
The darkness of Emily Brontë's characters is probably one of the reasons why it was picked to make them into vampires in a new story. However, Brontë's writing skills are so high that when you want to use her story, you have to try and reach her excellence... which was not the case in this vampire story.
I would say it was enjoyable enough as a casual reading, but loving the origina
My first mistake was not reading Wuthering Heights first. So, right off the bat I didn't know how closely this story was following the other. What can I say, I like vampires and I was intrigued. It was different than what I was expecting, but once I got passed that I started to enjoy it. There didn't seem to be one decent character among the lot except perhaps the narrator and house keeper and even they had their own prejudices. I guess like father like son like adopted son like daughter like co ...more
I probably would have started enjoying this book sooner if I had any idea what went on in Wuthering Heights. I think part of me intended to read Wuthering Heights first, but then I wrote my dry-erase board list and my OCD took over, so... Anyway, once I used Wikipedia to figure out if the story was the same, I found myself devouring this book. A little too far on the tragic side for my taste, but certainly enjoyable to read!
Though... the addition of vampires really didn't make it any different t
I never read the original (I know, I know but I just never wanted to) and thought since I loved vampires this might be a way to make it more interesting. In all honesty I only finished the book because I paid for it. I didn't hate it, but it was kind of boring and drawn out. It really just served no purpose
I've read Wuthering Heights so I decided to give this book a try. To be honest Wuthering Heights was pretty hard for me to make it through and stay interested in so I was unsure of how this book would go. The addition of vampires is amusing but unnecessary. It is the slightly modernized terminology that is used that made this version easier for me to read.
I kept a copy of the original Wuthering Heights on hand and compared and contrasted the two as I read. All in all I liked it but doubt i'll p
I, surprisingly, really liked this book. At first I wasn't sure, but it kept my interest. It only received 4 stars from me due to the lack of vampires. I was hoping for a MUCH bigger vampire presence, but they seemed to only be in the background. I admit that I remember nothing of reading Wuthering Heights while in High School. So, I cannot comment of whether this story kept "true" to the original. But, it did make me rather curious about considering re-reading the original. Once the story was c ...more
Bronte's tale of Heathcliff and Catherine reimagined as a tale of vampires, which explains some of the teen angst.

Pretty much same tale as Bronte's but there are vampires reside on the moors.

Actually kind of humorous.
I'd give this a one star but it was actually better than its parody counterparts (Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, Abraham Lincoln Vampire Slayer, Sense and Sensibility and Seamonsters etc)so I'll give it a two.

As far as how well I liked it... meh. Turning Heathcliff into a vampire did jack for the plot. It was the same story but with just enough tweaks to make Heathcliff a vampire. And of course there were large sections taken out to make the book a little more readable for the casual reader. I
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Before you think me completely insane for picking this one up, I must defend myself. I was taking a last minute car trip and needed a book! Also, it made Wuthering HEIGHTS (which i am currently reading) much easier to read. Somehow knowing the story (minus vampires of course) makes it easier to understand the language. I will say the story is almost exactly the same; it just explains away Heathcliff's annoying meanness but crazy love for Catherine much better than in the original. I still haven' ...more
This book took me forever to read... I don't know why it was so hard for me to get into and read... It definately had a great storyline... Only at the last 6 or so chapters did it start to grab at my attention... I wish I could give it more stars, but the characters were so crazy and the way the story felt jumbled around was hard for me to stick to it... Only when i had no other books to read did I actually read this... Sad but true... Maybe someone else would have better luck than me...
Morgan Dreiss
I tried to read Wuthering Heights in high school. But, it was so awful, I gave up within five pages.

But, I still wanted to know what the fuck Kate Bush was singing about, so I read this.

The vampire parody was a better read than the original.
Amanda Pratt
I have a soft spot for these twists on the classics, and when I saw this book, I was so excited! Wuthering Heights is one of my favourite books, and I love I figured it would be a winner. Maybe I just set myself up too high, but it really wasn't that great. There were a lot of draggy parts, and it took a LONG time for the story to get rolling, and then it was over quickly.
It took me a really really long time to finish this book. I just couldn't get into it. Even though I love Wuthering Heights, this just didn't get interesting until a little over half way through. It has been my in between book for a long time. Read a chapter while I wait for another book to come along. But, I'm done.
I don't recommend it.
Probably an above-average attempt at the classic-horror-mashup genre...but the effect is marred by a complete change in tone at the ending. It almost seemed as if it was trying to piggy-back onto the original success of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by adopting a similar air which really didn't jibe with all the preceding chapters.
Heather (Let's-Go-Pens-We're-Gonna-Take-This-One)
I think I only really liked this book for the Wuthering Heights aspect. The vampires weren't really much in the way of extra excitement for me.

I still don't like Heathcliff much and don't really have any sympathy for his "tortured soul" business.

I love the story though and am glad I kept up on reading this adaptation.

Wuthering Bites, why are you so awful? I feel like Lockwood was turned into a mouthpiece for everything the author did not understand about life in the early 19th century.

Someone please tell me when a decent nerdification of Wuthering Heights turns up, please?
Marcy Prybil
This was an amazing book! I have never read the original, but now I don't want to! This was not a smutty book in the least, but it kept my attention and I couldn't put it down. I really recommend this book to anyone who loves the flow of a classic novel, with a vampire thrown in.
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