How to Lose Friends and Alienate People
by Toby Young
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Read in January, 2003
Archived at http://web.archive.org/web/200...
How to Lose Friends and Alienate People: A Memoir by Toby Young
Reviewed by Valerie Hawkins
You have no idea who Toby Young is. And actually, that's the point. Toby Young is a British journalist who long ago put the idea of being a journalist in New York--the rustling, bustling, hustling New York of 1930s Hollywood screwball come...more
How to Lose Friends and Alienate People: A Memoir by Toby Young
Reviewed by Valerie Hawkins
You have no idea who Toby Young is. And actually, that's the point. Toby Young is a British journalist who long ago put the idea of being a journalist in New York--the rustling, bustling, hustling New York of 1930s Hollywood screwball come...more
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Read in December, 2002
Toby Young certainly does lose friends and alienate people in this sometimes interesting, sometimes boring memoir of his life as an English journalist in New York. The most interesting parts of the book relate to his stint at Conde Nast (or "The Conde Nasties") working for Vanity Fair magazine, and his clashes with the editor, Graydon Carter. Young is fired after two years, and it is really no surprise. Young does not play the game, finds his sophomoric antics humorous, and just doesn'...more
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Read in February, 2007
recommends it for:
upper class twits; manly americans who love seeing effete limeys take a fall
'you'll never eat lunch in this town again' meets 'bonfire of the vanities', but first the sort of trivia i love: englishman toby young (now festooned with children and with a killer column in the UK Spectator) enjoyed telling his new york pals that the word 'meritocracy' had been coined as a damnation rather than praise. they disbelieve him til he reveals that it was his father who coined it to describe a nighmare society in 'the rise of the meritocracy'. not a lot of people know that.
to t...more
to t...more
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Read in March, 2008
One of the reviews for this book describes it as 'funny,clever and touching". Personally I wouldn`t apply "funny" and "touching". It needs a certain kind of masochism to write about your own failure unless you have a very good sense of humour to write a very funny book. To me Young`s stories didn`t sound particulary funny.It`s difficult to grasp why he was so eager to enter the world of celebrities and at the same time he always acted in the worst possible way.The proble...more
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Toby Young is both a complete and utter comic genius, and a 100% hapless boob. Young, a British journalist is infatuated with American celebrity. He gets a gig working for Vanity Fair in New York only to find, much to his dismay, that it's all about style, and not so much substance in the high-rolling world of celebrity, fashion, glossy, magazines. He proceeds to make every mistake a human being could possibly make, and some that would never have been thought possible until he manages to pull...more
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Read in June, 2008
In my case, this is an all too familiar account of a Brit coming to America for various unexamined reasons, and ultimately being forced to confront them. Getting there can be highly amusing for bystanders, but believe me it's grim road to walk alone.
Toby Young does a remarkable job of making his travails both readable and comic. A lesser talent might not have been able to get away with the essays that intersperse his scenes, but he pulls it off - remarkably well.
Had the book not come recomme...more
Toby Young does a remarkable job of making his travails both readable and comic. A lesser talent might not have been able to get away with the essays that intersperse his scenes, but he pulls it off - remarkably well.
Had the book not come recomme...more
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I used to hate Toby Young. In fact, his London newspaper articles used to upset me so much that I actually wrote a letter to the editor to express how much I detested Mr Young and all of his ludicrous, sexist views. Then a friend of mine lent me his book and insisted I read it. Of course, I didn't want to, but one day I picked it up and then I couldn't put it down. And by the time I had finished, my views had made a 180-degree turn. Instead of hating Toby, I wanted to be his apprentice. This boo...more
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Read in January, 2008
Toby Young is an Englishman, a journalist who is intent on making a success of himself in the US, namely New York City. He fails miserably. Not because of his character, but because of the gulf in the culture. Despite appearing to be a fool, Toby is well-educated and explains what and why things went wrong, which they do for him with alarming consistency. He cannot get it 'right', but then again, the picture he paints of social life in NYC is one of men who are 'not quite human' and women who ar...more
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Toby Young gets a job with Vanity Fair in the mid 1990s. He comes to New York with boorish manners for a upper class Brit and stumbles through the job with middling success.
Toby's blusters in America help point out some of the absurdities our country holds compared to Great Britain. Most interestingly, he expands on his father's invention, the word "meritocracy" and its negative consequence, absolute entitlement.
Two-thirds of the way through the book Toby gets fired from Vanit...more
Toby's blusters in America help point out some of the absurdities our country holds compared to Great Britain. Most interestingly, he expands on his father's invention, the word "meritocracy" and its negative consequence, absolute entitlement.
Two-thirds of the way through the book Toby gets fired from Vanit...more
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Read in January, 2008
It's a small challenge to avoid completely despising Toby Young especially when he appears to be such a willing recipient of your disdain but when done with an open mind, it's possible to see Young as the same lovable, self absorbed sophomoric fuckup contained within each one of us. An expository essay in itself, his dealings with Graydon Carter are menacing and paint a new picture of a man accustomed to portraying himself as a bleeding heart, compassionate philanthropist of sorts, when in truth...more
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Read in June, 2007
This book is bad. As a memoir, it made for a good airplane read; very easy to follow. Toby Young makes several references to his personality problems, particularly narcissism. His 300+ page memoir does little to make us think otherwise. Very self-obsessed. Interesting for his perspectives on the entertainment industry, though frankly it comes across as a lot of name-dropping. This is a book you plow through and then never touch again. Somewhat ironic considering Toby's inability to get one night...more
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I really enjoyed this book - it made me laugh out loud at points. If you are a fan of Piers Morgan, or of arrogant, obnoxious British journos, this is the book for you. As a brit trying to make it in America, I found some of the wry observations to be spot on, and I loved the way Toby Young waxed lyrical about media people I hate such as Julie Burchill, Tina Brown and Anna Wintour. If you're not as shallow and fashion/gossip obsessed as I am... then you won't have a clue what he's talking about!...more
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So far I am loving this. Basic premise: a true story, Toby Young, basically a smart-alecky British journalist spends time and tries to be a part of the high powered NY magazine publishing world (circa mid/late 90s) bumping elbows with really important people and celebrities, making an ass out of himself and not caring too much. Told in a very funny self deprecating way but also poking fun at the world of the celebrity +/or important/beautiful people. Lots of laugh out loud parts.
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This is a very long rant of an ignorant, arrogant, and foolishly ambitious man during the time he worked as a staff of Vanity Fair. He tries to make excuses for his stupid acts by quoting remarks from various prominent philosophers, trying to justify his psychological stand--though, admittedly, I agree to some of them. It´s a worthy summer reading though, even when it makes you jerk with disgust at times, which I think is the main purpose of the author for the readers.
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Read in February, 2008
recommends it for:
Anyone who's been in the media world, anyone who loves glamour/hollywood stories
I got bored with this book. Toby Young's stories weren't fascinating enough for me to remain engaged, so I didn't make it all the way through the end. I think that he had an exciting experience in his climb through the NY Publishing world, but it wasn't enough for me to want to hear about it. It was very self-promoting, which is a typical trap into which I find most authors fall when writing their memoirs. Oh well.
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Read in November, 2007
This book was funny and interesting at times, but overall, it was not the greatest. It goes from stories about the writer's embarrassing hijinx to deep philosophical comparisons between the British class system and the American meritocracy. The book had it's moments - particularly the stories about Vanity Fair and the New York publishing world - but I was constantly wondering "where are we going here?"
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Read in January, 2005
recommends it for:
The anti social and other misanthropes
Again- An ok book with a great cover!!!! Awesome to leave out when you want to get someone to leave your house in a timely fashion- If it is a date, just put it next to How to Stay Single Forever and open the door- It works better than unannounced flatulence(not that I would know) The actual story is about a guy that wrote for Vanity Fair- It is ok enough to read but not great enough to reccommend.
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One of the funniest books I have ever read. Toby Young is hilarious in his memoir which details his inabilities to conform to the roles and responsibilities at the prestigious Vanity Fair. Almost everything he does is wrong, yet he manages to stay afloat for an impressive amount of time. Imagine a real-life version of Ron Livingston (Office Space) working at Vanity Fair.
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Grayden Carter is fraud, should be the subtitle of this book. (I don't know Mr. Carter and I don't care about Mr. Carter; I'm only passing along what the book makes no secrets about sharing with its reader.) Still, Toby Young charms. He's a very funny writer. Also, his father is apparently the originator of the cognate "meritocracy", to describe our political system. Check it out!
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I bought this book the day it came out I was very excited at the time to read this.. because of the whole vanity fair connection... i read it in 12 hours and exchanged it the next day for a book totally unrelated... althou this book is probably a bit abstract for someone who has no concept of publishing/ bullshiting your way thru a career i found it funny if predictable..
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