The Second Family: Dealing with Peer Power, Pop Culture, the Wall of Silence -- and Other Challenges of Raising Today's Teens
If you have a teen or pre-teen, you recognize the phenomenon already-perhaps without even knowing it has a name. "The second family," as uncompromisingly described by renowned therapist Dr. Ron Taffel is the immense collective power of the peer group and pop culture-a force so pervasive, it threatens to, and often succeeds in, overwhelming the first family of adults at hom...more
Paperback, 224 pages
Published February 11th 2002 by St. Martin's Griffin
(first published March 7th 2001)
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This book scared the HECK out of me but also showed me how adults can respond to adolescents who are increasingly turning to the "second family" (pop culture and peers) when their first family fails to engage with them. We need to take an active interest in kids and teens. This book will help parents to see the all-too-possible reality of what their children may be doing, give them practical steps to take to draw them back into the first family, and show them how to make good use of the strength...more
I will definitely use the insights in this book with families. Key concepts include balancing empathy with expectations and noticing how teens are different in positive ways when they are with friends, often getting needs met in the second family that they should be getting from the first.