Confessions of the Other Mother: Nonbiological Lesbian Moms Tell All!
After author Harlyn Aizley gave birth to her daughter, she watched in unanticipated horror as her partner scooped up the baby and said, "I'm your new mommy!" While they both had worked to find the perfect sperm donor, Aizley had spent nine months carrying the baby and hours in labor, so how could her partner cla ...more
I am so glad that I read this book again now that my son is going to be born in a few short weeks. Reading the book comforts me because it can feel like such a lonely affair, being a nonbio mom. I can't wait for my son to arrive and to conquer the challenges that life as a nonbio mom holds for me.
More than 15 years into the lesbian baby boom, Aizley's collection of first-person accounts by nonbiological lesbian mothers is a long time coming. Nonlegalistic and (mostly) nonharrowing, these tales are only tangentially about powers of attorney, two-parent adoption, and custody battles, instead illumining what it is to be mom and not-mom at the same time. Some pieces explore the feelings of envy and loss of would-be but infertile mothers learning to accept their easily...more
Shira Spector's story, in particular, was extremely annoying to read. I do not like her writing style at all. She tried way too hard to be witty, funny, and "different", all of which her story was not. In the end, it offered absolutely no real insight, as often times I kept forgetting what the hell I was even supposed to be read ...more
This covers a very wide range, from "Watching" where the 'other mother' originally intended to be the birthmother but Nature didn't cooperate; to the "Lesbian Dad" (a non-biological lesbian parent who chose the "Dad" role as her model); to women who have already been birthmothers and are now experienci ...more
Instead, I think the anthology format was working against this subject matter. Almost all of the anthologized essayists related more or less the same narrative arc to the reader: "Being the 'oth ...more
I also liked the fact that the essays were so different from each other. I could tell write away that some of the authors I would get along great with and others I didn't like so much. Even the authors I could tel ...more
I'd really like to hear what anyone else who may have read it thinks about it, especially in relation to their own experience.