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Take the Bully by the Horns: Stop Unethical, Uncooperative, or Unpleasant People from Running and Ruining Your Life
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Take the Bully by the Horns: Stop Unethical, Uncooperative, or Unpleasant People from Running and Ruining Your Life

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really liked it 4.00  ·  Rating Details  ·  52 Ratings  ·  11 Reviews
How often have you wished you knew how to defuse the difficult people who wreak havoc on your life? Whether it's a neighbor who keeps disturbing your peace, an employer who manipulates you into unpaid overtime, a spouse who criticizes and controls your every move, a colleague who uses scare tactics to intimidate you, or a student who teases your child without mercy, Take t ...more
ebook, 288 pages
Published September 9th 2003 by St. Martin's Press (first published 2002)
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Douglas Lord
Oct 31, 2015 Douglas Lord rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
"Bullies come in all shapes, sizes, genders, ages and professions," notes Horn (Tongue Fu!: How to Deflect, Disarm, and Defuse Any Verbal Conflict). True enough, but Horn's inconsistent writing and lack of useful tools drain this book of any worth. Confusingly titled chapters--"Depend on the Kinkiness of Strangers," for example, concerns personal safety and self-defense--render the table of contents useless. Good, albeit brief, chapters on school-yard bullies and using humor to defuse tension ar ...more
Carole Roman
Feb 05, 2014 Carole Roman rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Sometimes helpful, other times out right dangerous, this is an interesting book packed with tons of information on both bullies and their victims. Horn really knows this subject inside and out, and leaves no situation uncovered. He describes what motivates a bully, and then provides different scenarios to implement his cures. While some of it was quite reasonable and sound, other times, one needs to have his head examined if they follow his advice. He has quotes by the boatload, that while enter ...more
Amy
Jul 26, 2011 Amy rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
Excellent book - it made me realize a simple fact that I’d been completely overlooking, that not everyone wants to find a solution which makes everyone happy. Some people just want their way and nothing else. So successful communication with these people follows a different set of rules. That realization saves a LOT of time (and peace of mind)!
Arial Burnz
Jul 12, 2011 Arial Burnz rated it it was amazing
If you've ever had VERY difficult people to deal with in your life, this book will show you how to deal with them effectively. I learned the hard way how to deal with bullies and everything I read in Ms. Horn's book confirmed I learned it right.

I highly recommend this book if you have a bully in your life OR if you're not sure and you want to find out. She helps you identify what bullies do, why they do what they do, and how to adjust your behavior to get them off your back.

Though her approach i
...more
Qu
Apr 22, 2012 Qu rated it it was amazing
Shelves: health
“Giving bullies empathetic attention gives them an undeserved ‘bully pulpit’ “(page 28)

“One of the best ways to persuade others is with your ears-by listening to them.” – Dean Rusk

“Dr. Jacob Azerrad […] Americans attend more to bad behaviour than to good behaviour.”(28)

“Getting into a negotiation with a bully and hoping he’ll be ethical because you’re being
ethical…is like getting into a ring with a bull and hoping he won’t charge because you’re a vegetarian.”(40)

“When dealing with bullies, we n
...more
T.
Dec 29, 2012 T. rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction, 2012
Don't go into this with a specific problem in mind. Or do, and be surprised to realize it could honestly be worse. At least in my case.

If you want a good "glance over" of various strategies to deal with difficult people in your life from the average annoyance to the stalker to the abuser, this book covers it. It also has a chapter about bullies at school, although I'm not sure the advice in there would help. It is a theory, not actually tested.

Some of it is theory and some of it provides good to
...more
Phyllis
May 22, 2014 Phyllis rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Great advice of anyone dealing with an adult bully.
Angela
Book is written for adults, but copious ideas are adaptable for all ages. Humorous and well organized, there is a shaded section listing the highlights and strategies listed in each chapter with clear action examples of things to say (and NOT)to defuse a potential situation.
Oceaneyes12
Dec 27, 2015 Oceaneyes12 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: i-own, nurse-reads
Fantastic read. It's not specifically directed to any one occupation or people type, but beneficial for them all. Definitely one all nurse leaders should have in their office to help those experiencing lateral violence and the "eating-their-young" phenomenon.
S.
Oct 10, 2010 S. rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: self-help, safety
Very good read. Gives excellent pointers on how to deal with nasty people.
Angela
An adult approach to setting appropriate limits.
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