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The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship --Toltec Wisdom Book

4.24  ·  Rating Details ·  23,087 Ratings  ·  711 Reviews
In the tradition of Carlos Castaneda, the author distills essential Toltec wisdom on human relationships as well as techniques for integrating this awareness into daily life.
Hardcover, 240 pages
Published November 1st 2002 by Amber-Allen Publishing (first published January 1st 1999)
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Laura
Feb 20, 2008 Laura rated it it was amazing
Mastery of Love is one of the most influential books I have ever read. I recommend it to all of my girl friends and I think every guy should read it as well. Ruiz also wrote The Four Agreements...very good read but I liked Mastery of Love more b/c as a girl that has grown up in a (pleasantly) divorced family, I am a skeptic of love and it’s hard for me to open up.

This book starts off discussing love on a conceptual level but then turns into more of a How To book...which is the part I enjoyed th
...more
Matt
May 06, 2012 Matt rated it it was ok
Disclaimer – I doubt I ever would have chosen to read this book without a recommendation from someone else. It was lent to me by a co-worker, and I read it, in part, out of respect for her.

The author: Miguel Ruiz once went to medical school and became a surgeon. Later in life after a traumatic accident he forsook it all to learn the healer’s ways and become an “Eagle-Knight” in the Nagual tradition. He has since studied the “Toltec” people and written about their teachings. He has written a few
...more
Michele Harrod
Jan 06, 2013 Michele Harrod rated it it was amazing
This is one of those perfect books, that sits on my bookshelf, and then miraculously falls into my bag, just as I head away for a long weekend - just when I need it the most. You know the times, those short breaks, when you need to take some time out to try and make sense of the world, and where you fit into it. This book answered those questions perfectly. In fact Don Miguel Ruiz's explanation of the hell that is earth, and how and why we have so foolishly created this for ourselves, was just w ...more
Shannon
We practice and practice, and we master how to be what we are not.
Soon we forget who we really are, and we start to live our images. We create not just one image, but many different images according to the different groups of people we associate with. p20

If you take your happiness and put it in someone's hands, sooner or later,s he is giong to break it. If you give your happiness to someone else, she can always take it away. Then if happiness can only come from inside of you and is the result of
...more
Jeanny
My reaction after I completed the book:
Well, that was .....{o_0}..... I think ..... I need a moment to compose my thoughts....

This is not my usual choice of reading material. However, I stumbled upon a discussion about this book & its merits & became intrigued with the concepts being discussed. So much so as I walked out of the room I immediately purchased the audible version of the book. The narrators Jill Eikenberry & Michael Tucker did a decent job reading the material. They had
...more
Brad
Dec 04, 2008 Brad rated it did not like it
I just can't get past the bad writing. The concepts occasionally seemed worth a bit of thought yet by the time the author finished beating them into the ground through repetitive poor sentences I disregarded the ideas in disgust. Really, I didn't know someone could rephrase a single thought so many times without once expressing it in a succinct, (or even quasi-intelligent,) manner. Ah well, I guess I won't be able to 'self-help' after all... Ghost writer, anyone?


Ursy
Jun 18, 2011 Ursy rated it it was amazing
This book has very little and everything to do with creating meaningful relationships with others. It's sole focus is about creating a loving relationship with yourself. It gives real world examples of how we create our own hell. If we can create it, we can destroy it. This book looks at how and why we've created a dream of hell and sheds light on how we can turn that dream into a dream of heaven.

Although I was not big on the slightly religious undertones in some of the chapters, I do believe th
...more
Liz
Mar 25, 2014 Liz rated it liked it
This book certainly contains some good and well needed advice, for example it frequently stresses the importance of self acceptance and self love, a concept which I think many of us struggle with.

However, I found the book difficult at times because it frequently seemed to fall into the realm of over simplification. Perhaps non western based concepts of 'enlightenment' are supposed to be by nature - simple - and I am missing the point? But I'm not entirely convinced of this. I agree that Western
...more
Kennia Belikov
Aug 10, 2015 Kennia Belikov rated it liked it
What beautiful messages! Don Miguel Ruiz writes of the toltec teachings on love. The toltecs were known as men and woman of knowledge and for thousands of years they have passed down their knowledge. I can definitely see myself going back to this book and rereading any chapter. The reason I gave it 3 stars was because there was a lot of repetition and the writing was not the best BUT I will not let this stop you from reading this book. I'm going to read more of Don Miguel Ruiz in the future!
Christie
Jan 23, 2009 Christie rated it it was ok
Ruiz's delivery irritates me just as much as Thomas Friedman of the World is Flat. Of course, I have been in the minority before, and I don't mind being in it again.

On the positive side, this book contains some healthy and true messages about how we love, and why we fail, and how so many of our actions and reactions are based on fear. There were some messages in this book that I needed to hear, but I could have removed a lot of fluff of the analogies and stories. They either just felt off the wa
...more
Amy Lesher
Feb 27, 2013 Amy Lesher rated it it was amazing
If you are seeking to understand how & why relationships work out they way they do, this book is a gem. From it's all about you to it's not about you, these teachings will shift your understanding to a different level.

"A Toltec is an artist of Love,
an artist of the Spirit,
someone who is creating every moment,
every second, the most beautiful art--
the Art of Dreaming.

Life is nothing but a dream,
and if we are artists,
then we can create our life with Love,
and our dream becomes a masterpiece of a
...more
Esmeralda Jimenez
Jan 15, 2010 Esmeralda Jimenez rated it it was amazing
Shelves: spiritaul
The best spiritual book I have ever read. It teaches you how you can reach happiness and love, within yourself. Once you have mastered self-love and have healed from emotional wounds, happiness is achieved and this is vital for a healthy loving relantionship. This book will have a dramatic influence in 2010 for me, just what I needed. Can't wait to start reading the Four Agreements.

"Happiness can only come from inside of you and is the result of your love. When you are aware that no one else ca
...more
Jen
Apr 30, 2011 Jen rated it it was amazing
There was a lot of good stuff in this book. These were my favorite quotes:

"Love is ruthless. It doesn't feel sorry for anyone, but it does have compassion. Fear is full of pity, it feels sorry for everyone. You feel sorry for me, when you don't think I am strong enough to make it. On the other hand, love respects. I love you; I know you can make it. I don't have to make your choices for you. You can make it. Compassion comes from respect and from love; feeling sorry comes from a lack of respect
...more
Maija
Dec 19, 2011 Maija rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Šī grāmata, manuprāt, nebija parasta grāmata. Sākumā šī grāmata bija par mīlestību, cilvēku savstarpējām attiecībām un to saskaņu.
Sākumā šī grāmata pierāda to, ka mīlestība nepastāv, kā tās ir tikai bailes palikt vienam, bailes tikt sāpinātam jeb arī vienkārši tu jau esi pieradis pie otra cilvēka.
šī grāmata ir ļoti psiholoģiski pamācoša, jo šī grāmata māca to, ka nevajag meklēt jeb radīt otrā savas īpašības. Nevajag radīt cilvēku pēc saviem principiem un uzskatiem.
šo grāmatu es ieteiktu izlasi
...more
Sarah
Jan 15, 2016 Sarah rated it liked it
Shelves: self-help
I went into this book with an open mind, not really knowing what to expect, but being aware that many people consider the writing of don Miguel Ruiz one of the most important influences on their spiritual lives.

I enjoyed the beautiful writing of this book. I could imagine myself sitting around a campfire listening to the author's soothing voice teach me all I need to know about becoming one with my spirit.

But then I got to the parts that were harder for me to contemplate. For example, I love t
...more
Regina
Mar 22, 2016 Regina rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Es war ganz interessant mal was anderes als sonst zu lesen :)
Keshav Bx
Jan 08, 2016 Keshav Bx rated it it was amazing
What I loved about this book was it was concise, practical and told me the key nuggets I needed to know about taking a better approach to self love.

I really learned a lot from the analogies made in the book throughout and the emphasis on focusing on your 50% and mastering the self love you already have was powerful.

Definitely a must read, and it's nice and short and to the point. Can see myself coming back to it again and again.
Alaa Bit Hashim
Sep 03, 2016 Alaa Bit Hashim rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I can never be thankful enough to Nada for recommeding this book to me, this book is exactly what I have always needed to read, and the universe conspired to make me read it, exactly when I needed it the most. One of the books I read as part of my birthday celebrations, my "new year, new me" resolutions, part of my year of yes, year of let's do this right, and year of finding my true self. And in the pages of this book I was enlightened to knowing exactly how I abused my super power and my ultim ...more
Wilhemina
Mar 28, 2013 Wilhemina rated it did not like it
Not sure what he was trying to say...thoughts are not coherent. Not very well written. Definitely a waste of my time trying to read it!
Kathryn
Jul 15, 2009 Kathryn rated it did not like it
didn't "technically" finish it....it was too terrible...boring, lame, corny, and repetitive...highly unrecommend
Nancy
Feb 26, 2015 Nancy rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: People who think
"What makes you happy is love coming out of you. And if you are generous with your love, everyone is going to love you..."

"Selfishness comes from poverty of the heart...we become selfish when we..." [fear that love won't be provided to us]."

So many great quotes from this book, it suffices to say that it is a very valuable read.

Ruiz takes the reader on a journey illuminating the origins of self-destruction and self-pity to emerge cleansed, as a wise lover...of one's self. What was thought to be
...more
Ned Powell
Feb 05, 2015 Ned Powell rated it liked it
I found it difficult to be receptive and take the book seriously, coming from a scientific and critical thinking background. It was all a bit "airy-fairy" for me. There were lots of stories and analogies, and lots of repitition of the ideas in different ways, and I wasn't much a fan of this structure...or maybe it was just the lack of quality of the writing. Though I really did try to be open-minded and learn from the book what I could. Who knows, maybe I've taken away some wisdom that I can use ...more
Mads P.
Jul 29, 2008 Mads P. rated it liked it
Good. One should definitely read the Four Agreements first, even though this repeats some of that. The basic message is that you can't love anyone else until you love yourself. Love comes from within, not without. I think most people know this, but don't really live it. One of his big points in both books is that most of what we see/think about life is an illusion. Everything exists in our perception, we don't see things as they really are, we see them how we're trained to see them. He asserts t ...more
Irene
Jun 06, 2016 Irene rated it it was ok
Shelves: humans
I picked up this book because it was recommended to my husband by someone else and it was on his nightstand. It’s full of great thoughts and affirmations but it’s written in a repetitive and very hippy-dippy woo-woo style. I made it halfway through and did not finish.

Want a relationship book about attachment, fear and love that's actually good and written by a doctor? Read "Attached" by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller instead. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9...
Michelle
Aug 28, 2016 Michelle rated it it was amazing
This may be considered New Age thinking, but I did not take it in that context. It is knowledge that I could see being passed down from our ancestors. I say that because I found a version of the audio book. In my mind, as I listened, I was sitting next to a fire while elders shared wisdom in the form of metaphors and mythology. So, I gave this book five stars because parts of it resonated with what the native, primal part of me recognizes as truth.
Toni
Sep 13, 2016 Toni rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I was very excited about this book mostly because I loved The Four Agreements which I thought was life changing. This story did not live up to my expectations. It was an enjoyable read but I thought that some of the metaphors were a stretch. However, I was able to take away some positive concepts and tools that I believe will be beneficial to my life.
Polina
Mar 01, 2012 Polina rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: audio
While I count the 4 agreements as one of the few truly life changing books for me, I found the Mastery of Love lacking in any kind of concrete pivotal idea. In fact, now that I am writing this review 1 month after listening to the audio I can hardly recall at all any ideas from it. Still I have and frequently use the cards based on the book so I still give it a high review. Perhaps its lack of distinct impression is simply due to being exposed to the cards first and being familiar with all the i ...more
Pamela
Dec 22, 2011 Pamela rated it liked it
Recommends it for: Not sure
Recommended to Pamela by: Mark
This book both frustrated and inspired me. I could not relate to the continual analogy of human relationships as the same as animal relationships, but there were many excellent pieces of advice: "Happiness never comes from outside us . . . If you take your happiness and put it in someone's hands, sooner or later, she is going to break it.". "Love has no obligations. Fear is ful of obligations.". There are excerpts I will read again to remind myself that "happiness is the result of love coming ou ...more
Eve
Jan 08, 2016 Eve rated it it was amazing
Toltec (Artist of the spirit) teachings on relationship, happiness and love. I listened to this in audiobook format. Similar to Conversations With God, the audiobook alternates between a female and a male voice, which in my opinion helps me focus more on what is being said without my mind wondering.

This book presents in very simple language why we behave the way we do, how our experiences with self and the programming we receive from others has a trickle down effect that can at times have negati
...more
Megan Cates
Oct 11, 2015 Megan Cates rated it it was amazing
The Mastery of Love
Megan Cates

"We practice and practice, and we master how to be what we are not.
Soon we forget who we really are, and we start to live our images. We create not just one image, but many different images according to the different groups of people we associate with." Miguel Ruiz's, "The Mastery of Love," teaches you how to reach happiness and love within yourself.
Mastering a relationship is therefore about action. It is not about concepts or obtaining knowledge. It is about ac
...more
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The tools shared by don Miguel are based on common sense and shared with such simplicity, that the universal message underlying his teaching is recognized by many. don Miguel's message is simple, practical and when implemented, even incrementally, changes lives.

In the tradition of the Toltec, a Nagual guides an individual to personal freedom. Combining new insights with old wisdom, don Miguel has
...more
More about Miguel Ruiz...

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“You don't need to justify your love, you don't need to explain your love, you just need to practice your love. Practice creates the master.” 210 likes
“And what is the right woman, the right man? Someone who wants to go in the same direction as you do, someone who is compatible with your views and your values-- emotionally, physically, economically, spiritually.” 142 likes
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