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Watch Me Die

3.69 of 5 stars 3.69  ·  rating details  ·  487 ratings  ·  52 reviews
Harvey Mapes is a 26-year-old security guard who spends his nights in a guard shack outside a gated community in Southern California, reading detective novels, watching reruns, and waiting for his life to finally start... which happens when Cyril Parkus, one of the wealthy residents, asks Harvey to follow his beautiful wife Lauren.

The lowly security guard jumps at the oppo
Kindle Edition, 224 pages
Published June 8th 2011 by Adventures in Television (first published 2005)
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Betty G. Brown

I bought this book on my Kindle, and was in the middle of another book when I started reading it. The language and sex were a little much and sometimes I felt sorry for the lead character. He seemed to be "mentally challenged" and wanted to be a "PI," like mystery books portray, but instead he seemed to be more of a bumbling idiot. This author took this character and literally brought him to adulthood by the end of the book. He is not the same person in the end and I finished the book r
Evan Rail
I loved this book. It's got a great premise whereby the "hero," such as he is, seems pretty damn close to a real person —a slovenly, underachieving, regular Joe who almost accidentally turns into a halfway-decent detective by the end. We're not talking about a superhero. We're talking about a guy who drives a beater and who gets beaten up. His transformation is a hell of a lot of fun to watch.

Truth be told, I'd probably give this 92 out of 100. One shortcoming: the ending kind of flops over the
Ein nicht mehr ganz junger Mann, lebt in seiner eigenen Welt. Als gescheiterter Student schiebt er Nachtschicht bei einem Wachdienst. Ein Job bei dem er ungestört einen Detektivroman nach dem anderen lesen kann. Das ist seine Welt, die der Detektive. Bis er selbst einen Auftrag bekommt, eine Frau zu beschatten. Er taucht ein in eine allzu reale Welt, versinkt, spürt das Adrenalin. Er riskiert viel, liest passend dazu weitere Romane. Er wird zusammengeschlagen, doch da kann ihn schon nichts mehr ...more
I enjoyed the tone of this book more than the plot. The story was well-crafted, and the characters were at least theoretically plausible; but it was the painful vulnerability of the main character that drove the book. Goldberg did an excellent job of making Harvey's Walter Mitty persona lovable. I really enjoyed the frequent reference to some of my favorite fictitious detectives (Joe Mannix, Jim Rockford, Kinsey Milhone, Elvis Cole, and Travis McGee to name a few), whose activities and antics we ...more
george burns
Juvenile Fantasies

Harvey Mapes is a twenty-nine year-old security guard who mans the gatehouse at a wealthy, gated community. His thinking is strictly juvenile and he is obsessed with fictional private detectives and sex. Then, a resident asks him to follow his wife (an adult might be suspicious). Mapes is entranced by the prospect of living his dream. The first part of the book is an amusing parody of Male's make believe heroes, but he gradually starts to become an investigator (not a professio
Robert Vaughan
Jul 19, 2014 Robert Vaughan rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: Anyone that likes Detective shows.
I found Lee Goldberg by reading his Monk series. This is the second non-Monk book by him I have read and it was very pleasing. A short book that rolled right along smoothly and kept me in it until the end. A great way to kill 2.5-3 hours and you won't even know the time had passed.

I like the constant references to the protagonists TV heroes and the fact that he never quite learns that he is not on TV. Not very realistic storytelling but, lets face it, Mr. Goldberg is a TV writer, it's to be exp
Cheryl A. Lord
Not bad, not great.

College dropout gets offered money under the table to follow a guy's wife. When he finishes the task to the customer's satisfaction he can't resist chasing the whole story down for his own edification. He finds some things about himself he didn't know and he doesn't like all of them. He realizes he's been living a life of quiet desperation and begins to craft a new future.

Not a bad read. Just not a great read. Finished reading to find out who done it. Felt like eating a sandwi
Watch Me Die is a mystery novel that draws you in. The story has plenty of twists and turns and the writer's droll and witty voice entertains throughout.
Michael Donnelly
Mystery/detective piece, lots of satire, very well done, and a nice surprise.

About halfway through the work I felt as if the writer had finished the book and was looking to fill words to make a novel, but I was happy I continued, as it picked up and ended with a nice twist.

This is not literary fiction, but for a snowy Saturday, or a getaway at the beach, this will do well.

The humor is done well also, which isn't common in novels, but pushes this from approachable to something worth picking up.
Nathan Shumate
"Watch Me Die" was originally published under the title "The Man With the Iron-On Badge," a title which better fits the serio-comic story of a security guard who wants to be the kind of private eye he’s read about in dozens of paperback novels. Goldberg, who’s one of the most credible voices of the new self-published revolution (credible because he was originally one of its detractors until the weight of evidence convinced him otherwise), originally self-republished the ebook version under the o ...more
This was a fun book for mystery fans like me. The protagonist, Harvey Mapes, has a tedious job, working as a security guard in a super exclusive subdivision. The only thing that makes the job bearable is that he can lose himself in his favorite paperback mysteries. He's obsessed with Jim Rockford.

One of the rich residents hires Harvey to follow his wife, which seems like the beginning of his new and exciting Private Investigator career. It doesn't take much for Harvey to come up with an answer.
Tulay Leonhardt
Really enjoyed this book.

I never know what is coming when I start reading Lee Goldberg books. With this one laugh out loud so many times, slow moving, it's a sad but good book. Glad Mr Goldberg you are not Harvey Maples. Also narration by Luke Daniels was very good.
I enjoyed this book very much and it was quite a quick read. It kept my interest and curiosity as to what would be happening next. I'm a fan of the comic Kick Ass and this book reminded me of it in many ways. There was an immature nobody type protagonist who develops through the acting out of his fantasies. He's not very good at what he does at first but is rather likable in his ineptness and transformation. There's a level and description of violence that will make some people uncomfortable but ...more
Jill Feine
Fun read - rather naive, idiotic main character - but you kind of root for him through the book. It was quick, meaningless but enjoyable read that's great for getting through down time or allowing yourself to be distracted by something somewhat mindless but fun!
Jack Knapp
A plus; highly recommended.

Starts slow, but then the surprises start coming. Well plotted, a near-masterpiece in fact, and the character development is even better. If you're a fan of well-written mysteries, this one is for you.
Absolutely terrific

Thoroughly enjoyed his co-authorship with Janet Evanovich and the Monk t.v. shows. Will certainly read more by him. This one was funny, serious, and compelling. Loved every word.
Stephanie Diaz
A new twist on old noir. Suspenseful and actually pretty moving. His voice is really funny. Actually lout loud at Harvey's musings on how being a private eye isn't anything like Spenser, Mannix, or Travis McGee.
Anona G. Hogwood
Quick and intriguing.

Good one day read. Didn't put it down for more than 30min. at a time. Frequently suspected what was fact, but never sure. Twists and turns and attention holding.
Beverly Saragusa

Could not put it down!! Easy to read and was an enjoyable story. Surprise ending, too!! As I always say, try it, you're going to like it, too!!
Jeana Moralez norris
thoroughly enjoyable

Read from cover to cover in one sitting. As soon as I'm finished writing this review, I intend to check out Goldberg's other books.
Good story

A pretty good story written in first person. Would definitely read more by this author. I finished it in one day because I couldn't put it down.
Mystery fanatic become private eye

This is my second book of this genre and it is a great book. there was a lot of cliché detective expected by Harvey and up in till he solved the crime, it was his reasoning and for any mystery readers. THIS IS A MUST!
Slow moving but good story

Took me awhile to become invested in this book but it did turn out to be good. Interesting turn towards the end.
linda kiedrowski

The third person telling the story isn't my thing in this story. The guy in the story was more real though. Kind of a bad ending.
Thomasine Cuscaden
Loved it

A fast paced good read. The main character is a loser detective wanna be who is as determined as he is inexperienced.
Sally A. Mittl
Good Read

I enjoyed the story. The writing style was good. Best was that it was funny. I'd recommend to anyone who likes to read.
Constant page Turner

First, Goldberg book I've read and I'm glad I did so! Will be adding other titles from this author to my must read list.
Susan Wang
As a mystery/thriller fan, this book seemed rather a waste of time. The main character is an inexperienced security guard whose three-stooges-like personality goes on and on with needless narration that interferes with the storyline. His success as a newbie private investigator is all due to good luck, as the level of his IQ appears below average, and his needs for food, sex, money, and fame all seem to be at levels of desperation.

Take away all the daydreaming and the book would be left with ju
Debra Belmudes
It was OK, but nothing special. Glad the audio version was only 5+ hours.
Harvey Mapes is a security guard for a gated community who is recruited by one of the tenants to follow his wife. Soon Mapes is finding himself in the situations he's read in mystery novels and seen on TV.
I almost didn't make it past the first couple chapters, because the head of an immature, slacker 26-year old boy is a really unpleasant place to be. However, the humor and the deft plotting pulled me through, and I am glad I stuck with it. Mapes does grow as a character, and the nods to some of
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New York Times Bestselling author Lee Goldberg is a two-time Edgar Award and two-time Shamus Award nominee whose many TV writing and/or producing credits include "Martial Law," "SeaQuest," "Diagnosis Murder,""Hunter," "Spenser: For Hire," "Nero Wolfe," "Missing." "Monk" and "The Glades." He's also the author of the Fox & O'Hare series with Janet Evanovich (The Heist, The Chase, The Job), "The ...more
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