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Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog: The Amazing Adventures of an Ordinary Woman
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Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog: The Amazing Adventures of an Ordinary Woman

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3.7 of 5 stars 3.70  ·  rating details  ·  2,637 ratings  ·  618 reviews
This one’s for you, extraordinary ordinary women everywhere! It’s time for seriously hilarious girl-talk with New York Times bestselling author Lisa Scottoline. She’s shared this collection of scenes from her real life, and she bets her life sounds a lot like yours . . . if you crave carbs, can’t find jeans that fit, and still believe that these two things are unrelated. P ...more
Paperback, 320 pages
Published October 12th 2010 by St. Martin's Griffin (first published November 18th 2009)
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Carole (Carole's Random Life)
3.5 Stars!

I have enjoyed Lisa Scottoline's writing for quite some time. I would have to say that I became a pretty big fan of hers when I went to an author event at my local library when she was touring for Look Again. I couldn't believe how much fun I had listening to her. She was funny and she threw snack cakes at the audience which is always a plus. I went home that night with a huge grin on my face, a snack cake to devour later on, and a brand new tote bag that she gave me for buying several
...more
Melody
I picked this up on the strength of the title. I'll give any book that makes me laugh out loud in the library a shot. I should have read the flap copy, because this is almost the perfect storm of nonfiction I hate- let me count the ways.

The author writes (1)"chick-lit" that is (2)massively popular. This (3)collection of (4)newspaper columns features several (5)guest columns written by the author's daughter. The essays are (6)cute, (7)upbeat, and (8)warmly nonjudgmental. They feature (9)Spanx, (
...more
Nancy
This light, humorous book about "lessons learned" reminded me NOT to make snap judgements. This is totally the kind of book I would pass over in bookstores and consider myself too thoughtful a person to ever consider reading. (Translation: too much of a literary snob to want to be seen reading this kind of book).

BUT, a dear friend pressed it in my hand, saying what a treat it was, so "whatcha going to do"? I gave it a whirl and after 20 pages decided that it was just too cute and too fluffy that
...more
Sally Sullivan
This book is Hysterical. I had forgotten how great it feels to truly laugh out loud. So far the funniest chapter by far is "Everything Old is Nude Again" The first line reads ..."Something dangerous is going on in the world of women's underwear, and I want to nip it in the butt. Sorry. I am referring of course to Spanx." You will cry and probably identify gladly or ...sadly.

But it is not all funny, for the tempo rises and falls like a gentle ocean, one minute you're laughing right out loud and
...more
Paul Pessolano
Lisa Scottoline is best known for her 15 mystery novels. "Why My Third Husband Will Be A Dog" is humor at its best. The book is a compilation of articles that she did for the Philadelphia Inquirer. They are short stories, 2 to 3 pages long, that gives the reader a look into her life.

Lisa has been married twice and she "makes no bones" in telling us how bad these marriages were, she calls her husbands "Thing One" and "Thing Two". She has a daughter that is going off to college and is the apple of
...more
Jeanette  "Astute Crabbist"
This is a collection of very short (3 pages or so) pieces from Scottoline's "Chick Wit" column for The Philadelphia Inquirer. Fun to have around and pick up when you have a few minutes to read here and there. She covers everything from shopping for undies to losing her father to cancer.

As with any such collection, my appreciation of these little pieces was uneven. The unevenness was even more pronounced for me with this book because Lisa Scottoline and I have some things so strongly in common a
...more
Ali
Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog gives us a slice of life from the sometimes sentimental, often hilarious, definitely extraordinary life of author Lisa Scottoline. Ms. Scottoline is ingenious and full of life as you'll be able to tell from listening to her recount some of her weekly Chick Wit column in the Philadelphia Inquirer and additional stories on life, love, family and pets from her outlook, which can be a comical one to say the least.


I'm not the only one who thinks of chloroforming her
...more
Ashley
A collection of Scottoline's newspaper column called "Chick Wit". I'm feeling distinctly "meh" about this one. Her style is witty and unapologetic, but the cheesy endings to the columns started become annoying after like the 5th one. Did I mention there are 70-ish articles in this book? It reminded me David Caruso on CSI: Miami. You know how he does that cheesy one-liner to open the show while looking over his sunglasses like he's the coolest guy ever? That? Well, that was what the endings to al ...more
Toni
May 12, 2014 Toni rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Women
Yes, I finally finished this book and absolutely hated finishing it. I just loved Lisa Scottoline’s sense of humor. I picked this book up due to the title. I had to control myself and not laugh too load when I was in the bookstore and saw it on the shelf. That would not be the only laugh that this book would give me. The chapters are short and sweet. This book was great to take along while waiting at the doctors office or if I just needed a good laugh. Yes, it took me months and months to read b ...more
Karen Brooks
This book is a collection of columns that Lisa Scottoline, a novelist, wrote for the Philadelphia Inquirer and, as the title indicates, they are humorous, reflective, self-deprecating and frankly, really heart-warming. They might not be everyone's cup of tea, but this rich glimpse into a thrice-married writer, with one daughter, a feisty aging mother, a gay brother and loads of dogs, is delightful.

From braless emergency room moments, to her mother insisting on wearing a lab coat, to her daughte
...more
Linda
For those, who have ever played the imaginary dinner party... in a heartbeat I would invite Lisa S. as the Guest of Honor.

This collection of essays and some written by her daughter were as perfect as one could hope for. There is a "something" for everyone. Mother-daughter, pets, best friends forever, family (especially loved Mother Mary), and the ex-husbands. I "spoil" on if you're looking for a tell-all on the husbands... it isn't going to happen and this was good news.

The essays are fun to re
...more
Mary
This is a great book of essays about what it's like to be an ordinary woman living in the world today (originally published as columns in the Philadelphia Inquirer). I laughed out loud so many times. I also had several moments when I thought to myself, "Wait, someone else feels the same way that I do about X"? (especially about Dead Whoppers in my movie candy, or about how the reason women interrupt each other all the time is because we're so excited about what the other person is saying, we jus ...more
Jan C
Feb 28, 2013 Jan C rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Jan C by: Kirsti
Shelves: non-fiction, humor, 2013
Well, I thoroughly enjoyed this book which was taken from her columns in a local newspaper in Philadelphia. Tales mainly centering on her daughter and her menagerie, ranging from dogs to cats to chickens to, I think, ducks.

The attcks of the spiders when she merely opened the door had me laughing out loud.

"A best friend is just another name for accessory after the fact."

"Little Tony has his own seat next to mine, and his side of the car with his dog toys ... bottle of water ... with paper cup
...more
Sarah
I have read Lisa Scottoline's mysteries for years, and am always anxious for her next one to come out. So, when I heard that she had published this book, which is not a novel, I was intrigued. I finally got it from the library and was so excited- and, I am happy to say, this book did not only not diappoint me, but exceeded my expectations.
This collection of "Chick Wit" columns allow us a peak inside Scottoline's life. I must say, I felt that I knew her family, and recognized them (or parts of th
...more
Nancy
Sometimes it just terrifies me to think what must go on in this woman's mind. But what I think is even more terrifying is that we see real estate ads in the same way. But, I have been pulled back from that precipice by knowing that I don't have to discuss shaving with my mother. Yeah, I know, but you will have to read the book to fully understand that one.

So goes this fun little book by the author of the Rosato and Associates series. Combining articles from her Philadelphia Inquirer columns, Lis
...more
Eileen
I have enjoyed the author’s books in the past. Some of my favorites were Think Twice, Look Again, and Save Me. I downloaded this book to my Kindle and have been a few of the short stories in between other books. In fact, I read her other short story book, My Nest Isn’t Empty, It Just Has More Closet Space. It was after reading this first collection of stories that I decided I need some more laughs. I think she is the new and younger Erma Bombeck who also had her start by writing newspaper column ...more
Rebecca Gierman
May 14, 2014 Rebecca Gierman rated it 3 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: women
Shelves: book-discussion
I typically don't read these kinds of books and honestly the title turned me off a bit. I was expecting a whiney, man bashing chick book. But I like humor essays and love dogs so I gave it a try. (plus my boss recommended it and it's always a good idea to read books your boss recommends)

With my bar set low, I was pleasantly surprised how witty and entertaining it was. She's no Sedaris, but I found myself laughing out loud at her musings about how Golden Retrievers are so laid back you forget the
...more
Rama
Lisa Scottoline on her life

This is a collection of over 70 vignettes from the author's column on the Philadelphia Inquirer. She tells her stories with a touch of humor from a woman's perspective. I found some parts of her book funny and worth listening to, but it gets a little boring as you scan through the tracks of her audio book. She connects with many women who are divorced and trying their best to recover from failed marriage, caring their kids and struggling with a job that is not enough t
...more
Margaret
I was captivated by these short clever essays. I may start going to the Philadelphia Inquirer on line to see if I can find them. I laughed out loud a lot while I read it which made it worth every minute in a month that has had few laughs so far. I love Lisa's novels, especially the ones that feature Mary, who may be Lisa with a gun. I think I'll enjoy them even more in the future. Usually when authors step out of their familiar genre, the resulting books are less successful. But, this was a blas ...more
Jill Manske
Ok, I admit I picked up this book largely because of the title - I mean, who could resist? Lisa Scottoline has written numerous novels, but this book is unlike any she has written previously. It's a compilation of humorous columns she wrote for the Philadelphia Inquirer newspaper, each about 3 pages in length. The columns cover the whole gamut, from her failed marriages to her pack of dogs to raising her daughter and raising chickens to growing up Italian with an Italian Catholic mother. Some of ...more
Ruth
It's our long lost third sister! I thoroughly enjoyed this book which is a collection of the columns that Lisa Scottoline writes for the Philadelphia Inquirer. I could relate to so many things that Lisa said in this book. I recommend it to anyone who likes a chuckle. She has a different way of looking at everyday things in life which is very entertaining. I can't wait to read Think Twice.
Ellen
I agree with Jeanne. Read one at a time as a weekly column, I would be a big fan of Lisa Scottoline's essays. She's very funny and writes about both light and serious subjects without getting preachy or sappy. But a whole book's worth of these essays at once was a bit much.
I've never read her mysteries (not my favorite genre), but now I'm going to see if I can find some to read.
Richard
Jan 12, 2010 Richard rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: every adult
Recommended to Richard by: I read all her work
Lisa Scottoline has a tremendous sense of humor. This book is a collection of her newspaper columns and range in subject matter from raising chickens to her family and visiting New York City on book tours.

You will laugh. You will cry. It's a very fast read with each chapter just one column of about 900 words. You will also learn more about her than most of us want to know.
Sadie
I started reading Lisa Scottoline years ago because I love legal novels. I recently discovered that she writes others things as well (Like Look Again) and this book which was sitting on my mother in laws table. So many of these short stories were hilarious. Who knew there were so many different sides to Lisa Scottoline? A really fun and easy read.
Cory
I'd never actually read a Lisa Scottoline book before, but then I met her and realized how delightful and funny she is. This book was the perfect introduction to her, as it's a collection of personal essays previously published in the newspaper. Although stylistically they got a little grating toward the end, all in all I found these funny and touching.
Terri
Lisa Scottoline has a great storytelling voice for this. That's where the great part ends.

Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog began as columns for the Philadelphia Inquirer and should have remained columns for a newspaper. Together the stories get boring and well, not very funny. I think that was the point of the book, humor, and it is not humorous in that laugh out loud, relating to the tale sort of way.

It was a bit like listening to a bad joke in the midst of others and trying to pretend that y
...more
Jennifer
This is probably closer to a 4.5 for me. I found myself laughing out loud often. My friend got this for me as a Christmas gift and I'm so glad she did. I may not have picked it up otherwise, and now I can't wait to lend it out to others, especially my mom.
Lexi
This book is just a collection of short essays by Scottoline. I liked some more than others but overall I enjoyed the book. It was nice to read something that was light and easy for a change.
Shan
I don't think "hilarious" should be used to describe this book, as shown in its GoodReads description. I think the word "humdrum" would be much more suiting.

Frankly, I didn't find Scottoline to be a very good writer. The whole time I was listening to this book, I kept thinking how she could make each chapter more funny, OR how IIIIII could make each chapter more funny. But most of all, how Erma Bombeck could rip this book to shreds.

And each chapter wasn't meant to be funny, which made this book
...more
Pmcpmd
Listened to it. A collection of columns that at times was funny and interesting, but the daughter's periodic narration was annoying and there was a lot repeated.
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Lisa Scottoline is the New York Times bestselling author and Edgar award-winning author of 23 novels, including her latest, EVERY FIFTEEN MINUTES, which releases in April 2015. She also writes a weekly column with her daughter Francesca Serritella for the Philadelphia Inquirer titled "Chick Wit" which is a witty and fun take on life from a woman's perspective.
More about Lisa Scottoline...
Look Again Save Me Come Home Don't Go Keep Quiet

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“Because the thing about love is that we can't control whether we get it, but we can control whether we give it.” 58 likes
“Women shouldn't iron, ever. It's our wrinkles that make us interesting.” 37 likes
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