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The No-Cry Discipline Solution: Gentle Ways to Encourage Good Behavior Without Whining, Tantrums, and Tears

3.86  ·  Rating Details  ·  466 Ratings  ·  68 Reviews
Winner of the Disney s iParenting Media Award for Best Product

Have the Terrible Twos become the Terrifying Threes, Fearsome Fours, Frightening Fives, and beyond? Elizabeth Pantley, creator of the No-Cry revolution, gives you advice for raising well-behaved children, from ages 2 through 8

In The No-Cry Discipline Solution, parenting expert Elizabeth Pantley shows you how to
ebook, 304 pages
Published May 11th 2007 by McGraw-Hill Education (first published January 1st 2007)
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(showing 1-30 of 928)
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Oct 29, 2009 Adrienne rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This is possibly the most helpful parenting book I've EVER read. The most important thing for me was that it helped me realize that I have become the kind of parent I never wanted or expected to be: too serious. Pantley gives lots of useful suggestions for encouraging compliance BEFORE resorting to consequences, what we normally think of when we think of discipline. She helped me see that eliciting obedience from my toddler can actually be fun, not just "the law".

For example, rather than saying
Mar 12, 2013 Suzanne rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I picked this up in hopes of adding a few tricks to my arsenal for dealing with our 2.5 year old. Turns out we'd figured out some of the strategies on our own, and they have indeed worked for us, and there was other good food for thought, as well.

Part one discusses the foundation for building the behaviors you want to see from your child. There's a very handy chart describing various bad behaviors from teenagers that most of us hope to avoid, and related things you can do with your toddler, pre
Apr 02, 2009 Rebecca rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting
Pantley presents a varied collection of useful parenting techniques for dealing with unpleasant kid behavior. Talk in a funny voice, get on their eye-level, give choices, set up routines, give warning before changes... she also presents a useful (if a little drawn out) chapter on dealing with anger as a parent-- YOUR anger.
So this is a useful and hopeful reference-- with specific and simple techniques for specific situations. And the author wisely says-- use what works for you, your kid, your s
Jul 17, 2008 Joy rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: all parents
Possibly my favorite discipline book so far. It's super practical, and addresses things from a parents' point of view. I'm a fan of Pantley's writing overall. I really liked the No Cry Sleep Solution books as well. She addresses things from an attachment parenting standpoint, yet also deals with these issues realistically. I sort of contrast these books in my mind with the Sears books, which are full of a lot of theory, but not a lot of real answers.
I was really disappointed by this book. I figured that with all the recommendations it got in attachment parenting circles and with "no cry" in its title, it would have less of a behaviorist bent. We gleaned a few things that work in our family, but most of it requires rewards, consequences, praising, etc...
Mar 01, 2011 Shareen rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting
I didn't realize when I picked this up that this is geared for preschool-age kids. I like the author's outlook on parentintg, so if I'd read it when my kids were younger I might have rated it higher. She did make a couple of points that I like. One is that a great majority of the things our children do that make us angry when they're young are not significant in the grand scheme of things (eating dinner, spilling, going to bed, etc.). That's something I need to keep in mind. The other point I li ...more
Luiz Fabricio
Repetitive, but very good (english/português)

The book says a lot about assertiveness and points out that the best way to communicate what we want to say , it's not like we are used to. Children have an innocent language and devoid of certain language features we most often use. The way I understood the book, the best way to communicate with the child is always with a direct sentence , close visual contact, with short and easy sentences to understand . Vague commands shouted from other rooms only

Kris Irvin
Eh. Useful to skim, but seriously? I've heard and tried all this before. Really. Multiple times.

I am still waiting for the instructions/guide to my son, because these parenting books I have read, none of them have solutions that have helped thus far.
Jul 23, 2015 Amy rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting-books
I was excited to get this book; then once I had it I gave it one apprehensive look then shelved it—for months. My kids are three and seven, which means I’m pretty heavily invested in my parenting style. The fear of finding out all that I've been doing wrong (once again) was almost enough to keep me from cracking it at all. However, my daily life continually showed me how much room there is for improvement.

I needn't have worried; Elizabeth has raised four children and understands how parenting c
Dec 13, 2010 Robin rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I recommend this book to any parent (natural, adoptive or step) who wants a non-combative and guilt-free approach to dealing with behavior issues in children ages 2 to 6. I read this book a couple of years ago, but since Ian was only about a year old, most of the issues were not something I could identify with yet. Not to say that there are no issues with a very young, energetic and inquisitive child, but more that we were not yet communicating on the level that this this book addresses. Now tha ...more
Erin Woods
Sep 12, 2008 Erin Woods rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Excellent book! This has widened my options for dealing with the whining and tantrums of my two year old, and has helped me be more understanding of the "whys" of her frustration and what I can do to help her through it.

The book offers several ideas for first, understanding why your child is upset (hungry, sleep deprived, bored, unable to communicate, etc.); second, diverting attention, such as giving choices (do you want to hop like a bunny or jump like a frog to the car?), or "making it talk"
Mar 05, 2008 Erin rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: all parents; especially those who view discipline as a teaching tool rather than a punishment
Shelves: parenting, own
I really enjoyed this book, and I can see myself going back to it again and again for reference in the future. I originally checked it out of the library, but plan to buy a copy soon. The book is very readable, and the author "speaks" in a knowledgeable tone without being condescending. Most of the advice Pantley gives is very practical and useable.

The best way to "sum up" the contents of this book? Pantley mentions that some parents have just one "tool" in their discipline toolbox. And if that
Feb 10, 2008 Tiffany rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: parents, therapists who teach parents, caregivers of young children
Shelves: parenting-books, 2008
Pantley's guide for "discipline" of babies, toddlers and preschoolers is chock full of down-to-earth, common sense advice. On one hand, I found myself saying frequently, "yep, already do that" but there were some gems in this book that we've already put into practice - AND THEY WORK. For example, she suggests making shoes and things talk to get your toddler to cooperate. My ordinarily touchy 2-year-old who has thrown a full-blown hissy fit at putting her shoes on for the last year is suddenly pu ...more
Aug 08, 2012 Jennifer rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Parents and caregivers of young children
This was one of those books that I just knew from the first page that it was going to be helpful. As in all of her "no-cry" books that I've read so far, Elizabeth Pantley gives solid and gentle advice, encouragement, and suggestions. She helps you to realize that you are not alone in the way you feel about things (here discipline) and that you ARE a good parent. "The no-cry discipline solution" is full of helpful tips and advice to help parents (and anyone who is around children) understand why ...more
Nov 04, 2008 Ruth rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I sat down and read this cover to cover after an especially trying day with my 3 and 2 year olds. I'll definitely go back and reread parts. While there were a lot of ideas that I think I already knew it was still good to have them laid out clearly and understand why they work. Some of the ideas didn't really mesh with me. But overall I like how she describes it as a bag of tricks--so many parenting methods seem like they are trying to sell you on this one right way and if you just do it right... ...more
Oct 04, 2008 Abigail rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: moms of toddlers and preschoolers
I have to admit, I probably already knew (in some form) about at least half, if not two-thirds, of the techniques suggested in this book. The ones I didn't know about were very worthwhile, but that's not what made me really like this book. *That* was Pantley's attitude. Reading this book made me feel good about being a parent, and okay about my mistakes. And, meanwhile, I actually got good advice.

For those of you who are totally focused on the advice, btw, this is still a great choice. She cove
I would suggest reading this book if you have never read any other child-behavior or parenting book. Much of it is common sense. If you are a parent looking for ideas, this is a great resource to skim. There are quite a few quotes and anecdotes from parents using this method, as well as real-life examples and suggestions on how to deal with problem behaviors.
Becky Travis
Mar 14, 2014 Becky Travis rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
There are so many good ideas in here to help prevent problems. I'm really excited about all the ideas in this book about how to avoid tantrums before they actually happen. There's also quite a bit about controlling your own anger to keep from escalating your child's emotions which was also very helpful.
Sep 03, 2008 Karen rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Parents with children ages 18 months - 5 years old
A refreshing parenting book...finally! The author doesn't pretend to have a secret formula or all the answers, but this book is FULL of so many great reminders, tips and tools. I've already used several of her ideas...and I can see them working!!!

Pantley first discusses discipline...the big picture. It is the foundation for the rest of the book. Then she tackles everyday challenges and provides VERY specific ideas, so that as a parent you can pick and choose those that you think might work best
Dec 27, 2011 Mandy rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Unlike most parenting books (or most self-help books, for that matter), this book gives concrete, practical how-to advice. The advice makes sense, is illustrated by real-world examples, and even comes with lists of Dos and Don'ts. In that regard it is easier to understand and more useful than nearly any other parenting book I've read. The author doesn't get too bogged down in theory and philosophy. She just lays out concrete suggestions for overcoming common childhood discipline problems - a tec ...more
Great Strategies

This book has given me so many new strategies on how to handle my daughters current and future behavior. Thank you. It's been very helpful in solving some of our discipline issues.
Apr 27, 2010 Meg rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting
I liked this book quite a bit. It's a nice, general discussion of discipline with a ton of specific, concrete strategies you can use. Very down-to-earth, realistic tone. I really like the section about parental anger, validating that every parent gets angry, and giving a specific set of steps to help you handle the anger.

I should mention that my baby is only 12 months old so I am not quite to the point of using most of these behavior strategies yet! Another caveat - if you have a child with sign
Apr 26, 2015 Vex rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: ebook
I vaguely remember the author's "No-Cry Sleep" book as being rather unhelpful and too attachment-parent-y, but this book was ful of useful advice and helpful techniques.
Nov 22, 2010 Nicky rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book is full of useful suggestions and lays out a sturdy foundation from which you can make discipline decisions. Pantley emphasises reasonable expectations for the child's age and development and the teaching of correct behaviour over more punitive or "old-fashioned" discipline methods.

The thing that pushed this book over from a four star to a five star is Pantley's excellent chapter on parental anger. Pantley asserts that, as a parent, your children will anger you and it's not the anger
Jan 30, 2014 Jessica rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I've posted some of her tips on my fridge and I find looking at the frequently helps manage conflict with my two year old. Kind and peaceful parenting ideas...
Jul 18, 2011 Kimberly rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting, own, 2011
I'm becoming a big fan of Pantley. This was an excellent book and I really agree with her method of preventing behavioral problems by making sure your child's basic needs are met. For instance, a tired or hungry child is much more likely to have a tantrum than a well-rested and well-nourished one. I love the examples she uses basically asking how we would feel as parents if someone was constantly nagging at us all the time. Her suggestions for making things fun and redirecting attention are refr ...more
May 29, 2008 Anne-Marie rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Pantley defines "discipline" as leading and educating the child to right actions. Because of this, her discipline strategies are many and varied, and she encourages readers to choose the ones that work best for them depending on the situation. She offers specific tips for problem behaviors in the last half of the book.

The most helpful section suggested that parents imagine what they want their kids to behave like as adults, and then to figure out how to move slowly toward those goals through dis
Dec 01, 2011 Katie rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read-11
I really liked this book. It provided a lot of perspective on how children behave. I especially liked the story of the mother following her child through the store and concluding that she (the mother) was bored. Haha. There were a lot of potential empathy exercises in this book. I like the attitude that children aren't bad, they just lack the ability to communicate and control their emotions. It seems like having that perspective would help bring patience to parenting. Although, I am not a paren ...more
Dec 31, 2013 Joanne rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This has been one of the most helpful parenting books I have ever read! She details so many helpful strategies to reduce tantrum behaviour in ways that are stress free and even fun. Above all, there is a strong emphasis on seeing things from the child's perspective, and viewing discipline as an opportunity to teach your child while maintaining and enriching the bond you share.
I did not want to return this book to the library. I renewed it 4 or 5 times before I finally had to return it. It had great information, stopped and made me think. I really needed the section on anger and the ways we express it in a not so effective way and how to stop yourself and make more effective and loving choices. I enjoyed the last section that was discussed specific behavior issues. Definitely a good book for my shelf and refer to throughout parenthood.
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Parenting educator Elizabeth Pantley is president of Better Beginnings, Inc., a family resource and education company. Elizabeth frequently speaks to parents at schools, hospitals, and parent groups around the world. Her presentations are received with enthusiasm, and praised as realistic, warm and helpful.

She is a regular radio show guest and frequently quoted as a parenting expert in newspapers
More about Elizabeth Pantley...

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