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Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me
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Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me

3.34  ·  Rating Details  ·  2,231 Ratings  ·  356 Reviews
If relationships are college, getting dumped is graduate school. Ben Karlin, the former executive producer of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, knows that being romantically zapped can teach us important things about ourselves or, better yet, just provide us with great stories to entertain our beer buddies. In this rousing anthology, he taps fellow dumpees Jon Stewart ...more
Hardcover, 240 pages
Published February 4th 2008 by Grand Central Publishing (first published February 1st 2008)
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(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
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Feb 02, 2008 Justin rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Anthologies can be kind of repetitive, with entry after entry harping on the same tired theme. The theme for Things I’ve Learned From Women Who’ve Dumped Me feels particularly uninspired, as the topic of men bitching about women is arguably the most prominent in the history of literature. But the credentials of editor Ben Karlin (co-editor of America: The Book) combined with the book’s impressive list of contributors (Andy Richter, Stephen Colbert, Neal Pollack, more) piqued my interest all the ...more
Feb 11, 2008 Jennifer rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: greatreads
I know what you're thinking and no I am not and was not a lesbian, not that there is anything at all wrong with that. I picked up this book at ye old Costco, simply because of some of the writers names on the cover: Nick Hornby, Stephen Colbert, Bob Odenkirk, Andy Richter, and Dan Savage, to name a few. Also, I secretly wanted to know what relationships were like for men. As a straight woman, you never can tell. Men are simple in their thoughts and emotions - NOT SIMPLETONS - just not as complex ...more
Apr 11, 2009 Chloe rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I heard this in its Audiobook format, which probably led me to appreciate it more than I otherwise would have. Having each author read their short essay was perfect, especially with such instantly recognizable voices as Patton Oswalt, John Oliver and Will Forte. It's a very short read, even the audiobook was barely over three hours long, but one that will have you chuckling all the way. I particularly liked Dan Savage's ode to the vagina that scared him out of the closet and Larry Wilmore's "my ...more
Hannah  Messler
Eh. I'd hoped this was going to be hilarious and insightful, but all the humor was pretty much the same thing all the way through--low-grade irony and drab self-flagellation. Buncha weinerdogs.
Feb 15, 2008 doreen rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: single guy friends, or any guy friends in general
Shelves: memoir, collections
This is a great read. The writing from most of the contributors is funny, interesting and enjoyable; I think there was only maybe one or two works that were sort of "meh" for me. On the whole, I found myself very engaged in the writing, having finished this book in two days (I took a break to watch the first disc of Pee-Wee's Playhouse).

The formatting of each essay/anecdote differs, including comic-strip contributions and and illustration (Marcel Dzama!). My favourite entries include "Lesson #9:
Mar 02, 2008 Valerie rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: short-stories
I was expecting much more from this book. Edited by Ben Karlin - former editor of The Onion, former executive producer of The Daily Show and co-creator of The Colbert Report - this book should have been a rip-roarin'-romp through male inadequacy and insecurity. It started out strong, but somewhere along the line it became the male version of chick lit: dick lit. And boring to boot.

At first, it was good for a few laughs. But then I laughed less. And got bored. And maybe started to skim a bit. And
Dec 31, 2008 Anastacia rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Those who enjoy short stories, essays, humor.
Shelves: humor
This was one of the funniest books I have ever read, and it's one I will reach for many times to read again. A collection of humorous short stories by some of the funniest, wittiest men of our time, this is a book that never fails to cause me to laugh out loud until the end.

The book is a collection of essays written by hilarious men such as Nick Hornby, Stephen Colbert, Bob Odenkirk (who discusses why nine years is the perfect amount of time to be in a bad relationship ("by year nine you try eve
Mar 05, 2009 Jamie rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor
This is a pretty weak collection. I ended up skimming over several of these essays.

I expected better from Dan Savage (his books about his family are very good). David Wain's entry composed entirely of cellphone conversations was good. I also liked Patton Oswalt's essay where he explains how a past relationship with a crazy stripper puts his minor quibbles with his wife into perspective. And Ben Karlin's mom's forward was better than Karlin's essay.
Books Ring Mah Bell
done. chucklelicious. I was not sure who half these people were, very funny men. easy and quick. just like your mom.
Elevate Difference
I have a love/hate relationship with liberal publications, like the New York Times, that discuss progressive issues and at the same time print articles that seem to use stone age mentality to “prove” the differences between women and men. I am forever intrigued by science’s never-ending love affair with sexual dimorphism, and articles with the headlines “What Do Women Want?” and “Varying Sweat Scents Noted By Women” seem to fill the pages of publications every day.

I have a similar love/hate rel
Mar 05, 2009 l rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Bad. Disappointing. And further evidence that Stephen Colbert is not funny in print. A piece by Patton Oswalt was quite amusing, in which he realizes how awesome his wife is particularly in comparing her to his ex-girlfriend (a terrible, violent, uneducated stripper.) Actually, now that I think about it, Damian of Kulash, Jr. (of OKGO) had a pretty sweet (as in aww) piece, and Adam Schlesinger (of Fountains of Wayne. I know.) did an interesting and humorous breakdown of a cheesy love song. Oh, a ...more
Kim Ciara

luv it


It's something for us, girls, to read.
Jun 08, 2010 Oriana rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read-2010
Meh and meh and meh. This is pretty much what you'd expect -- a bunch of moderately clever dudes being self-deprecatingly funny -- except less funny than you'd hope. Despite a whole lot of filler, there are some some great moments, like when Andy Richter calls the people who run television networks a bunch of "gutless cunts" or when Dan Savage describes his first time putting his finger in a vagina as it feeling like "a large, lukewarm piece of lasagna with hair". David Rees is funny. Will Forte ...more
Feb 13, 2008 Patrick rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2008
Really funny collection of essays, including, but not limited to: Bob Odenkirk's transcription of part of his seminar: "9 Years is Exactly the Right Amount of Time to be in a Bad Relationship," Stephen Colbert's would-be heart-warming story that is all but completely blacked out by his wife's marker to keep things private, Will Forte's reminiscence of a girlfriend who kept riding off on another guy's motorcycle but kept insisting they were "just friends," Patton Oswalt comparing his wife at her ...more
Ross Vincent
Mar 07, 2014 Ross Vincent rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I don’t pretend to know my way with the fair sex- knowing that I am idiot and that they are in charge has made life SO much easier, at times. (Plus, it helps to have “Yes Dear” as a reflex response and well as being able to say “I’m sorry” and “You are right/ I was Wrong/ I should have listen to you”). Of course, given my history, there is a reason I have Ross Rule #63 (If a Woman is in love with me, there is a 75 – 90% chance that there is something unstable about them; finding that right minor ...more
Marissa Morrison
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Feb 27, 2009 Trevor rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonphixion
I was hoping for more laugh-out-loud stories, and while there were many smiles, I ended up feeling a little down -- these are stories wrought with insecurities, damages, and regrets written within plenty of self-deprecation -- It had me, and will have others (guys and girls), reflecting on past romances that left their psychological welts and fond memories behind.
Feb 20, 2008 Katie rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
A collection of essays from male comedians and writers about dating, relationships and their issues with women. Some of the contributions were entertaining and others not so much. I laughed out loud a couple times, but not quite as often as I hoped. Overall a quick, light read with a little something fun for anyone who has ever dated anyone, ever.
Jun 24, 2015 Bonnie rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor, essays, audiobooks
There were some extremely witty pieces in here (John Oliver reading Nick Hornby's intro was a hilarious start.) There were also some really not very funny pieces. Sam Lipsyte's piece was great, I enjoyed Patton Oswalt's ruminations on dating a stripper and Will Forte had a fun tale to tell. But there were some really bad essays as well. Dan Savage talking about how disgusting he found a vagina (I get it, he had to make sure he couldn't play straight, but there was nothing funny and a lot that wa ...more
Kimberly Ann
Jan 25, 2016 Kimberly Ann rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Oy ve! Where did they get this many whack-jobs?

So, I want to tell you, these are Not the type of men I'd be with! They are in no way, shape or form even qualified as mensch. More like, schlemiel...clueless.

What's more is all of these guys are now the pride & joy of their mammalas! All are now very successful comedians! But did I find them funny, well not at all...... I'm thinking, that this book written by men is for men...because I honestly didn't get what they were talking about.....

Do I b
David Kirschner
Jan 11, 2016 David Kirschner rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Funny collection of essays about what the title says. Most of them are quite funny and had me at least chuckling. A couple are amazing (the one about the cat) and had me laughing hard. There are some not very funny. I'd say this ratio, from meh to hahahah is like 25% meh, 60% haha, and 15% hahahaha. You should really listen to this as an audiobook though because the authors reading their work definitely is an experience you won't have reading it yourself. Some of their narration is excellent. Th ...more
Apr 20, 2008 R. rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2008
Highly recommend Paul Simms' "I'm Easy" which can be read at The New Yorker under the title "Four Short Crushes":

Apr 14, 2014 bup rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2014
It's an easy jab, but really the best thing about this book is the title. Twenty-some chapters, written by mostly comedians, and I expected more. Who understands hurt, and being dumped, better than a comedian? But most of these were trying to be clever, and ended up being neither funny nor touching. I didn't laugh out loud once, and I never even got sad, much less worried about crying.

OK, I'll tell you a bit worth reading - a few chapters that stood out- Ben Karlin's own chapter, which is perhap
Jun 10, 2013 Chelsea rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Great audio book, with essays read by the authors (very funny men, with some witty observations on dating -- usually unsuccessfully).
Apr 30, 2009 clare rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
At first I was like, "oh, how cute. Men are sensitive and insecure etc." Eventually I found myself thinking, "Where are your huevos?"
Feb 14, 2008 Felicity rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I thought there was going to be something interesting or at least funny in this book. I really found neither.
Jenny Houle
Ever look at a list of contributing authors and think "I CANNOT wait to read this!" only to be horribly disappointed?

Years ago, I purchased this book when it first came out. Then, while scrolling through audiobooks my local library had, I thought "Why did I never read this book before?" and downloaded it. I thought, particularly because all of the authors read their own essays, it'd be decent. It was awful, though I believe that flipping through it I realized that and never bothered to try to re
Feb 25, 2009 Rob rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I seldom read non-fiction essays, humorous or otherwise, 'cause they remind me too much of college - not exactly the happiest days of my life. Before I started reading the book, I looked at the other reviews here and as usual, some liked it - intensely, and not so intensely, and some did not like it - intensely and not so intensely. But one thing we can all agree on - the title is definitely eye-catching and very suggestive. I borrowed the book from the library and when the librarian saw the tit ...more
Sep 02, 2013 Nyssa rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Josephus FromPlacitas
A mixed bag. I picked it up mostly to see what Dan Savage had to say, having enjoyed The Kid so much. His contribution was so-so, as were many of the more famous writers' contributions (Stephen Colbert's was particularly unengaging for me). Surprisingly, a lot of the best pieces seemed to the ones by musicians, while the comedy writers tended (although not unanimously by any means) to have the weakest additions to the book. Particularly puzzling was the inclusion of alleged war criminal Bob Kerr ...more
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