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Foxy: My Life in Three Acts

by Pam Grier, Andrea Cagan (Contributor)

3.7 of 5 stars 3.70 · rating details · 284 ratings · 71 reviews

Some may know her as hot, gutsy, gun-totin' Foxy Brown, Friday Foster, Coffy, and Jackie Brown. Others may know her from her role as Kit Porter on The L Word. But that only defines one part of the legend that is Pam Grier.

Foxy is Pam's testimony of her life, past and present. In it, she reveals her relationships with Richard Pryor, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, and Freddie Prinze S...more

Hardcover, 288 pages

Published April 28th 2010 by Grand Central Publishing (first published 2010)

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Best Nonfiction Books of April 2010

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Jun 29, 2012 Buggy rated it 4 of 5 stars

Recommended to Buggy by: First Reads win

Shelves: bio-memoir, shelf-10

Opening Line: "I was snuggled in my mother's arms in the backseat of the old Buick. My Dad's Air Force buddy was at the wheel, driving us from Fort Dix Air Force Base to Colarado, where Dad was being transfered."

Unlike most people reviewing this book, I actually knew next to nothing about 70’s B-movie and Blaxploitation star Pam Grier before I began. I’d only ever seen her in Jackie Brown and knew that Quentin Tarantino had written the role exclusively for her. However after receiving this book...more Opening Line: "I was snuggled in my mother's arms in the backseat of the old Buick. My Dad's Air Force buddy was at the wheel, driving us from Fort Dix Air Force Base to Colarado, where Dad was being transfered."

Unlike most people reviewing this book, I actually knew next to nothing about 70’s B-movie and Blaxploitation star Pam Grier before I began. I’d only ever seen her in Jackie Brown and knew that Quentin Tarantino had written the role exclusively for her. However after receiving this book in a giveaway from the publisher (Thank you Goodreads First reads) I can now say that I’ve become an admirer of Ms Grier and her remarkable life. As far as biographies go this one is well written and flows easily with Pam telling her life story here in three “acts.”

Starting with; ACT ONE:THE EARLY YEARS. This was surprisingly my favourite part of the memoir. Pam tells of her childhood growing up in 1950’s Colorado as a tomboy and an army brat. Spending time riding horses on her grandparent’s farm, hunting and singing in a gospel choir. Pam always felt inferior because of her skin color and I found the details of racism and segregation during that time eye opening and frankly shocking.When her Air Force father gets transferred Pam also spends a fantastic year living in England and faces equality for the first time in her life. Throughout we get a feeling of Pam’s deep admiration for her mother, who as a strong, modern woman helped shape Pam’s work ethic and independent outlook for her entire life. In the early 70’s Pam’s beauty is discovered and after winning several pageants Hollywood calls her name.

ACT TWO:FRO'S AND FREAKS. Pam worked hard after arriving in Los Angeles. Holding down 3 jobs she goes on auditions and learns everything she can about the movie business. Along the way becoming a successful back up singer and model which leads to her eventual discovery and first movie role in The Big Doll House and a concurrent string of B exploitation movies. It was also during this time that Pam began dating a tall basketball star named Ferdinand Lewis Alcindor Jr or Lew. Lew of course goes on to become Kareem Abdul-Jabbar after converting to Islam. This part of the book was totally intriguing, as I knew very little about the religion and could definitely feel Pam’s heartbreak as she watched the man she loved change and although she tried couldn’t bring herself to convert and therefore couldn’t marry Kareem.

We also gain insight into her relationships with Freddie Prinz Jr and Richard Prior, both of which ended because of the mens well documented drug use. Pam does a fantastic job here of discussing her relationships without giving away any of the dirty little details which I respected. Labelled one of the most beautiful women alive Pam’s career continues to flourish during the 80’s with numerous TV appearances, awards and magazine covers. A particularly humorous event is recalled wherein Pam and John Lennon are kicked out of club Troubadour.

In ACT 3: FINDING THE BALANCE we enter the 90’s through to present. Which to me represents Pam‘s strongest time as she battles cancer and journeys into self discovery, yoga and alternative medicine. Pam now knows who she is and has few regrets (although she still struggles to find a decent man.) This is also when Pam re-emerges as a Hollywood A-lister with the release of Jackie Brown and later the L Word.

One of my only issues with Pam’s memoir would be that she tends to come off a little self righteous. I can’t honestly believe that every relationship she had failed because of the other person’s wrong doing or that she never drank or did drugs yet lived with Richard Pryor and hung out in the 80’s cocaine culture. She also tends to name drop. A lot. But I got to thinking about that and I guess if all your friends are famous directors, musicians and movie stars and that’s who you’re hanging out with then its not really name dropping is it? Although instead of just saying out of the blue, Snoop Dogg dropped by for lunch you might give us a few details about the lunch, that way it doesn’t sound like you’re trying to impress us, were already impressed, you‘re Pam Grier.

If your up for a good biography then I recommend this one. Cheers!(less)

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May 18, 2010 Dorothy rated it 3 of 5 stars

I remember back in the 1970's going to the drive in theater and seeing Pam Grier in the movies. I thought Foxy Brown was great. It was very inspiring to a teenage girl to see strong woman role in the movies. So I was very excited to get the chance to review her memoirs. Pam Grier wrote the book in a way that seems like she is just chatting and telling you what her life is about. Which makes the book a enjoyable personal read. Her memoirs help to bring to life many of the every day difficulties f...more

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Jun 22, 2010 RYCJ rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: my-keepers

I was looking for one thing, and one thing only. Where did the passion in the characters Foxy Brown & Jackie Brown come from!?! In other words, who 'really' is Pam Grier?

I was hesitant at first... you know, waiting for the lid to snap off... when I got to Donatello and from there just watched Foxy go! � Good Gosh, this here is the makings of one deft spirit that doesn't just ride, but drives!

What else did I love? Mom, for one, is a jewel, as was the mother/daughter relationship. Pam's prin...more

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May 30, 2010 Shannon rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: first-reads, 2010

Since I only knew Pam Grier from her role on The L Word, I wondered if I'd find this book interesting. I was also a little wary of a celebrity autobiography because of howwww baaaaad the Dorothy Hamill autobiography was when I read it earlier this year. She seems really interesting and down-to-Earth. This was a fun diversion read, and I won a copy through First Reads.

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Feb 25, 2010 Dora rated it 4 of 5 stars

I was fortunate to receive an advance copy of this at the library conference. When I saw it I just about died because I've always loved Pam Grier!

I always thought she was great, but this book opened my eyes to her very interesting life. Her personal history is so unique and profound, growing up in the 50s and 60s in the southwest, and her involvement in civil rights as a teen and early 20s in California. I loved all the stories she told, happy and sad, and felt completely connected to her life....more

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Sep 29, 2011 D Books rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites

I truly enjoyed this book. It was a real page turner. Without knowing anything about her, you would probably think she lived the perfect Hollywood life….a life that you could only dream of having. She came from very humble beginnings; had quite a few ups and downs in life; and maintains her feet on solid ground. You’ll find abuse, heartbreak, and inspiration in this book. Two of the take-away points that I found helpful in this book were (1) when Pam warns about being careful not to “find” yours...more

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Apr 24, 2010 Angypants rated it 4 of 5 stars

I didn't grow up in the 70's, when Pam Grier became a huge international actress. But I recognized, like many, what talent she had in "Jackie Brown".

I wasn't looking for anything gritty, but Pam tells it like it is. She is filled with a positive outlook, though; the excerpts from her life are well chosen. She's a real person here, and doesn't have any airs about her. "Foxy" is fun and heavy at some points, as Ms. Grier details her loves and triumphs.

My favorite story involves a runaway horse in...more

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May 20, 2010 Tara rated it 3 of 5 stars

I have always known of Pam Grier, but I didn't really become familiar with her until I started watching The L Word, one of the best shows of all time. I was excited to read her book because I loved her so much on that show. The book was good and has it's interesting parts, but she is a little too squeaky clean and wholesome. Which is good, but doesn't really make for a good book. I love her morals and her feminist ideals but she must have done something wrong that she regretted during her 60+ ye...more

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Nov 24, 2010 drbarb rated it 4 of 5 stars

Well, Pam Grier is one cool woman. Her autobiography sounds like she wrote it, not like Hollywood pablum. Her upbringing and her experiences are very interesting. Now I saw Fort Apache the Bronx, and was completely grossed out by her prostitute/coked out freak/murderer character at the time. When you hear her describe how she came up with that character, you have to admire her. It might not be Shakespeare (oh, if you saw that dog of a movie, you know it WASn't Shakespeare) but she took it on wit...more

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May 31, 2010 Molly rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2010, nonfiction, memoir

I like Pam Grier and was glad to learn a little more about her, but a lot of her memoir is .. well, dull? It's just not particularly insightful. Maybe I'm just wanting it to be as good as Backing into Forward, which is probably unfair.

And my jaw dropped when I got to page 88, where she wrote this:
"When girls start having lots of sex at young ages, they wear their vaginas out. Literally. What do you expect if you have intercourse four or five times a week with different partners starting when yo...more

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Apr 27, 2010 Holly Ord rated it 4 of 5 stars

Pam Grier is known for a lot of things. She is known as a truly gifted, hard-working, dedicated and passionate actor. She is known for being at the forefront of the blaxploitation scene, for her role as Coffy, Foxy Brown and for Quentin Tarantino’s Jackie Brown, a role, it turns out, that Tarantino wrote specifically for her. She is also known as Kit Porter, the ex-alcoholic and known singer who turns her life around and truly re-discovers herself within a group of supporting and loving friends,...more Pam Grier is known for a lot of things. She is known as a truly gifted, hard-working, dedicated and passionate actor. She is known for being at the forefront of the blaxploitation scene, for her role as Coffy, Foxy Brown and for Quentin Tarantino’s Jackie Brown, a role, it turns out, that Tarantino wrote specifically for her. She is also known as Kit Porter, the ex-alcoholic and known singer who turns her life around and truly re-discovers herself within a group of supporting and loving friends, who just so happen to be lesbians, in Showtime’s The L Word.

I knew Pam Grier mostly as Kit Porter, being much too young to have known her work as she was just a twinkle in a B-movie producer’s eye, but I was still thoroughly excited to get to know Pam Grier, the person and the actor, when I had the opportunity to review her newly-published memoir, Foxy: My Life in Three Acts. That in itself shows how Pam Grier transcends generations; her vast portfolio truly contains something for everyone, regardless of their age or their personal entertainment preferences.

Grier begins her memoir naturally, in the early years of her life–years 1949 to 1970. She grew up with her father serving in the Air Force, which allowed her family to see and experience everything this country, as well as other countries, had to offer, but at a time where people of color were forbidden to experience something as simple as public transportation. She recalled a specific experience when she lived in Columbus, Ohio at a time where segregation was at an all-time high and her family had been given a lovely place to live on base, but only because upon meeting her father, his superiors thought he was Caucasian, when he was really biracial. When they found out that her family were people of color, they promptly told her father that he would have to make other living arrangements off base. It was at this time, when Pam Grier was just five years old, where she realized that being a person of color came with many obstacles and she and her family ran into the racial wall throughout her childhood.

While Grier and her family moved every two years because of her father being active in the Air Force, she had always considered Colorado home, although she did spend some time in Wyoming on her family’s farm, which was also where she climbed onto her first horse and fell in love for a lifetime. While living with her Aunt Mennon, a compulsive, irresponsible and generally angry “wild child”, in the projects of Denver, Colorado with her mother, father and brother, as well as with her cousins, she was six years old when she was first raped by her three male cousins in the home when her mother was out and her aunt had left the children unattended. She was saved by the telephone repairman, who had come into the house and barged into the room when he had heard what was going on, after an appointment to fix the telephone wiring had not been cancelled. Grier never told a soul about what had happened to her, not fully comprehending what had happened. After being raped, she developed a stutter and consistently went out of her way to make herself unattractive to the boys, and to men as she grew older.

Her introverted behavior didn’t stop until she was much older and after losing her stutter, her introverted-self returned when she was raped again at eighteen years old, while out on one of her first dates with a family friend. Again, she didn’t tell anyone what had happened to her, this time, in fear of her family going out and killing her attacker and her need to keep peace within her family, as her parents divorced and she saw her mother struggling to complete her nursing degree.
After competing in and winning a beauty pageant, purely for the prize money she needed to fulfill her hopes of going to college to study film and to become an actress, Grier was offered the chance to move to Hollywood. She took the plunge and moved to California, quickly snatching up as many jobs as she could possibly work, as well as attend groups and meetings with UCLA students studying film on campus, although she was not a student.

While dating now basketball household name, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, who when she met him was just named Lew, Grier landed her first acting job, a “B-movie”, The Big Doll House. After completing that movie, she was immediately hired by the same people behind the first movie, for her second, Women in Cages. It was also at this time when Lew, now Kareem, was consistently pressuring her into converting to Islam and to be an obedient wife he could take care of; but Grier never wanted anyone to take care of herself, being a driven and strong-willed woman with goals of her own that needed fulfilling. She and Kareem inevitably split when he gave her an ultimatum to marry him, or else he would be marrying a Muslim woman who had already been prepared for him–and he would be marrying this woman on Pam Grier’s birthday of all days. Needless to say, she declined his offer, as painful as it was, because regardless of how open her mind was to the idea, the more she read the books Kareem had given her about converting and what would be expected of her, the more she thought that the religion was degrading and oppressive towards women and Kareem married a woman he did not know for his religion.

Pam Grier mentions a great deal about the importance of the women’s liberation movement and her mother sending her information on the movement and the advancement of women. She also mentions a cameo appearance Gloria Steinem made on The L Word, asking who has fought harder for womanhood than Gloria Steinem? But these statements in conjunction with one particular statement really left me with a bad taste in my mouth. Almost off-handedly, Grier mentions her sexual relationship with a man as a grown woman and says that women should wait to have sex until they can be with a good man because if they don’t and have too much sex at a young age, they will be too stretched out for sex to be pleasurable. This is actually rather offensive, since feminism has a great deal to do with sexual liberation, as well as liberation from the patriarchy. To warn that you will be too stretched out for it to be pleasurable feels more like a back-peddle from feminism and sexual liberation. While this may seem like a very tiny issue and may not even catch the attention of most who read her memoir, it is still embedded in my mind and it’s still rubbing me the wrong way.

Grier has been involved in long-term relationships with many men who had not been worthy of not just her, but of any self-respecting woman and after reading about her experiences watching boyfriends like Freddie Prinze Sr. and Richard Pryor fall down the long and dirty road of deadly drugs and self-destructive behavior, you have to respect a woman for following her logic instead of purely her heart and knowing that as much as she wished she could save the men she loved throughout her life, that sometimes you have to let them go and make their own decisions and having to be more of a mother than a partner to a man is something no woman should be expected to do. It was when she was in a relationship with Richard Pryor, who at the time had been doing so much cocaine that it was present in his seminal fluid, that Grier was told by her gynecologist that she would have to stop having a sexual relationship with him unless he wore a condom or she could die because the cocaine was showing up inside of her and was destroying her reproductive organs. Throughout Foxy, Pam Grier consistently proves to herself that she is stronger and more self-aware than she could ever possibly give herself credit for.

Pam Grier is a survivor. A survivor of repeated sexual assault, as well as a survivor of cervical cancer that she found she had when dating a man named Phillip who let his mother live in poverty, having to carry one light bulb from room to room when she needed to see around her house while he was raking in millions, and who also stood Grier up after she had come out of surgery. But Pam Grier consistently triumphed, throwing herself into winning the fight of her life and consistently shining in every finished product that emerges where we are able to see her dedication and hard work pay off. Grier is an underdog; a woman who came from very little, but with one dream and a great deal of hard work, she succeeded in what she set out to do in her life and she just keeps on shining.(less)

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Aug 02, 2011 Joanna rated it 3 of 5 stars

I have never seen any blaxploitation movies, but when I caught the Samuel L. Jackson remake of Shaft on TV, my interest in the genre was piqued. To this end, a friend lent me this book, which happened to be an advanced copy. I really enjoyed it; I hadn't really known anything about her life and work. The writing style is very casual and chatty, and that might turn some people off (one of the reasons I gave it three stars) and like said friend mentioned, it does devolve into a bit of name-droppin...more

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Apr 27, 2011 Meg rated it 4 of 5 stars

I really enjoyed reading this book (ok, I read the entire thing in one evening, not even noticing the time was passing so quickly!) and was really moved by Pam Grier's resiliency and optimism. I also enjoyed her upbeat descriptions of things she enjoyed (traveling to different countries, meeting interesting people...). I haven't seen many of her movies, but I'm inspired to watch more by her descriptions of how much work she puts into developing her characters. I also enjoyed her strong feminist...more

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Aug 20, 2010 Pamster rated it 4 of 5 stars

She is AWESOOOOME. God, she is so absolutely interested in everything. She talks about race, gender, rape, friendship with other women, her love of animals, her romantic relationships (holy shit Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Freddie Prinze, and Richard Pryor!), FILM, and so much other stuff. Love her to death. Total farm girl, totally serious actor, totally pro-woman, the best. She'll just mention things like being into architecture or comic books, and you just know she has so much more in her to write t...more

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Apr 18, 2012 Sharell rated it 2 of 5 stars

Since I've been a fan of Pam Grier's for some time now, this book came off as a huge disppointment. The book seems to be really vivid in the beginning, and then kind of drops off of the action when things should be getting good, like around the time she's with Freddie Prinze and Richard Pryor. It seems to me that she's leaving a lot out, either to cover for herself, or someone else. I think anytime you read an autobiography when the subject is completely blameless and spot-free in any situation,...more

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Dec 09, 2011 Kimberly Hicks rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: read-in-hard-back, african-american-read

Pam Grier is a remarkable woman. My God, I cannot believe all she went through in her life. We, as audience members, on the outside looking in, always think that celebrities have such a great life, and although Pam has a good life, this woman has gone through some horrible tragedies. A woman who has never been married, never had children, but has had some great loves. I was shocked to learn whom she had lengthy relationships, starting with Kareem Abdul Jabar, Freddie Prinze and Richard Pryor, to...more

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May 05, 2010 Jim rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: gr-giveaway-wins, non-fiction

Autobiographies are a tricky proposition. Balancing drama and tension, if there is any, with what amounts to an expanded cirriculum vitae is not an easy task. In Pam Grier's book Foxy the balance works. Sometimes. Sometimes it doesn't. I've always admired her work and had a gut feeling she was personally tough. Unquestionably, the best aspect of this book is knowing about the many hard knocks she's endured while keeping a positive outlook on her life and career. At worst it flips the old writer'...more

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Mar 21, 2012 Jeri Lane rated it 3 of 5 stars

I LOVE PAM GRIER.......She is a bad ass.....Once again its a star who was born out of adversity, tragedy, and sexual abuse, to rise above the rest and become a successful, independant, beautiful, strong willed woman who stands apart from the rest. She rose to fame during a time when black women didnt have a real place in hollywood....Blacksploitatio films became a part of pop culture cult status in the 70's and still have a following today. She is truly foxy.

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Sep 15, 2010 Rochonne rated it 4 of 5 stars

I have always been a Pam Grier fan and was excited to read this book about her life. Her battle with cancer, a survivor of being a black actress in a white male "Hollywood" gave me more reason to respect her and thank her for opening up the doors for other young black women who want to become an actress. She wrote with honesty, expressing little regret for the life she lived. More importantly, she painted herself as more than an actress, but as a well-rounded woman. I would have to totally agree...more

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Sep 06, 2010 Shelley rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: fans, film buffs

Shelves: first-reads

Pam Grier and I are birthday twins...that and the fact that she is a badass, awesome female led me to want to read this book. I was fortunate enough to get a first reads copy so it saved me from having to run out and buy it.

Foxy reads like you're having a conversation with Ms. Grier and she's telling you her life story. I'm sure that some die hard fans will already know much of the information that she shares in the book but even if you've heard the stories, it's different to hear them from her...more

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Feb 10, 2011 Gwen rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2011-read, girl-power, memoir

I recognize Pam Grier as an actress. It was amazing to read her life from the beginning. She tells it like it is and was in her life. As I was reading it, I kept thinking "it is interesting to read about a strong woman who lived and survived through racial discrimination and the women's movement." I couldn't decide if she liked to drop names or if these were people she just knew and how neat was that.

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Aug 24, 2010 Jasmine rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: auto-biography

What you do learn about Ms. Grier is that she is humble as well as graceful about her life and career as a gun-toting, karate-choppin' bad ass. Her honesty about her personal life which includes romances with an athlete, comedians and businessmen as well as a bout with cancer is to be respected. However, you are left wanting to know more about her career - at least I was.

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Feb 06, 2011 Ashley rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: autobiography-biography, nook, own-a-copy

I found this a really enjoyable book, learning about one of the pioneering African American actresses in the blaxploitation genre of film popular when Pam Grier first started rising to success. Ms. Grier is a strong woman who has managed to overcome a variety of trials, from a rape at the age of six by her cousins all the way up to her fight with cancer.

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Jun 12, 2010 Sarah rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: read-in-2010, biography-autobiography-memoir

Despite the many horrible things that have happened to Pam Grier--racism, multiple rapes, cancer, cocaine cervix (yep, you'll see)--she has had a pretty good life. Her gratitude and positivity come through without making the book dull. I found the writing to be hit and miss; I wish that people who hire ghostwriters would hire BETTER ghostwriters.

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Mar 09, 2011 Sharon rated it 4 of 5 stars

I read my life in three acts in three acts, and couldn't believe that she was in a relationship with freddie Prince and Richard Pryor or kareem that was strange to read about how her life was growing up and the sex abuse that happen in her life I was very surprise by the story. But it was good to understand the person she was.

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May 06, 2010 Nandi Crawford rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: bios-autos-and-memoirs, black-chick-lit, movie-movie, nandi-s-favorites

To me, the most anticipated book I have waited for since the year started. Pam Grier means many things to folks. Star. Survivor, Friend, Actress, Activist and the list moves on. This offering of a glimpse of her life makes you want to cry with her, root and cheer when you finally come to the end. She is easy to read, candid and to the point.

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May 27, 2010 Sarah rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: first-reads, memoirs

Ms. Grier has had a fascinating and turbulent life and she describes it candidly and modestly. It was easy to root for her as she disclosed her experiences with discrimination, sexism, illness, and failed romances with not a shred of whining, blaming, or self-pitying to be found. Ms. Grier seems like a humble, approachable person and she writes as if she's telling you her life story over tea. It was inspiring to read about a woman who lives her life with integrity, determination, optimism and a...more

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Sep 01, 2010 Elmonteban rated it 4 of 5 stars

I really liked this booked.

I love a book that makes me go to google and find out more information.

Her journey was rough but the way she told her story assured me that she was going to be okay in the end.

She quite frank about her relationships and she knows who Pam Grier in.

I love this woman.

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Jul 22, 2011 Ashley rated it 4 of 5 stars

I love reading memoirs because you get to dig deeper in to the life of someone in the limelight. This book allowed me to see the many sides of Pam Grier that I never knew she had. She has a very interesting background and story and I'm glad she opened herself up by sharing this with the world.

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Jun 18, 2011 Bliss rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: drama, family-matters, non-fic, sepia-sisters-and-brothers, social-issues, spirituality, violence, women-s-issues

Aside from the slew of famous people Ms. Grier has known and been friends with over the years, her life story is compelling on its own merit.

I love the way she is not afraid to share the details of not only her actions and activities but her thoughts, dreams, and intense self-reflection as well.

It's no wonder she seems to be at peace with her life. She's had quite a ride and lived to speak of it while some who were rolling with her back in the day didn't make it this far.

Kudos lady P!

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About Pam Grier

Pamela Suzette "Pam" Grier is an American actress. She came to fame in the early 1970s, after starring in a string of moderately successful women in prison films and blaxploitation films such as 1974's Foxy Brown. Her career was revitalized in 1997 after her appearance in Quentin Tarantino's film Jackie Brown. She is one of a few African American actresses to have received a Golden Globe nominatio...more

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