Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Start by marking “The Liar in Your Life: The Way to Truthful Relationships” as Want to Read:
The Liar in Your Life: The Way to Truthful Relationships
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating
Open Preview

The Liar in Your Life: The Way to Truthful Relationships

3.36 of 5 stars 3.36  ·  rating details  ·  116 ratings  ·  27 reviews
In The Liar in Your Life, psychology professor Robert Feldman, one of the world's leading authorities on deception, draws on his immense body of knowledge to give fresh insights into how and why we lie, how our culture has become increasingly tolerant of deception, the cost it exacts on us, and what to do about it. His work is at once surprising and sobering, full of corre ...more
Paperback, 320 pages
Published August 9th 2010 by Twelve (first published January 1st 2009)
more details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Reader Q&A

To ask other readers questions about The Liar in Your Life, please sign up.

Be the first to ask a question about The Liar in Your Life

This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list »

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 330)
filter  |  sort: default (?)  |  rating details
Jessica
This book was different than what I expected. I thought it would give guidance on how to determine if someone is lying to you or not, but it was nothing like that.

Feldman gives a wide range of examples of lies we encounter everyday and probable reasons behind those lies. He also includes several studies which point to conclusions we can safely make about lying. Really this was an educational book! Using modern examples (Enron, etc.) that we, the reader, can relate to and a pace and style that is
...more
Paul Froehlich
Mark Twain said that lying is a universal behavior that can and should be used for good purposes. Pastor Bill Hybels of Willow Creek Church, the nation’s first megachurch, teaches that lying is wrong and Christians should eliminate the practice. So which is it, a universal behavior that can be used positively, or a regrettable violation of ethics?

Professor Robert Feldman takes a scientific approach, presenting what the research tells us about human beings and deception. It’s fair to say that the
...more
Stephanie
Regardless of whether you're struggling with a known prevaricator or not, this book deals with the lies people tell in everyday circumstances, the reasons this happens, and how culture nurtures this behavior.

Feldman presents a clear picture of lies in everyday life, from a narrow individual perspective that gradually builds to the expected lies that permeate every facet of society. Would you believe that when you first meet someone, you'll lie about 3 times in a 10 minute period? What about the
...more
Deepak
This book is an interesting read for understanding lies in one's life. Most of us may be thinking that we don't lie or that the lies we indulge in are harmless. Mr Feldman ,himself a psychologist, has given a good explanation of the reasons we lie (knowingly or unknowingly) and as to the difficulty of tracing a lie.He cites one case study after another to show the various factors involved in lying and postulates that a certain amount of lying is important for a stable society.He takes an example ...more
Rob Healey
This book gave great insight into how often people lie and how it is socially acceptable (we ask for it) it was
Insightful in my relationships personally and in work. Gosh we are all insecure!
Siobhan
Jul 22, 2009 Siobhan rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: EVERYONE!!!
Shelves: non-fiction
This book drops on August 3rd. BUY IT! I just finished an "advance readers copy" I got from work. It's clear, succinct, well written, accessible, entertaining, edifying and to the point. If you love the truth, or have been lied to too many times, its incredibly helpful and enlightening. Author Robert Feldman utilizes numerous examples from popular culture to help illustrate scientific findings, including the Enron Scam, and Lou Perlman ripping off the Backstreet Boys and N'Sync. HOO-muthtruckin- ...more
Khalid
The Liar in Your Life is a book that addresses lying from different aspects. It does talk thoroughly about the forms of lying we're usually accustomed to referring to as lying, but it also addresses other interesting forms of lying which may not be as harmful (Some are even necessary).

It's a very interesting book discussing an interesting topic. However, I do find it to be rather dry at times; the author has the opportunity to make the book more interesting, and even though he is trying, I feel
...more
tiffany
I thought this book was interesting in the fact that it really highlights how much lying goes on in every single conversation and how to a certain extent some of it is almost crucial but, if it is not for the ease of the conversation (ease as in flow) then there is a residual effect that lying causes, so the goal is not to be perfect but to be better, the less is more theory basically. I would lying however (O: if I didn't say that I did skim the last of the book because it is a bit tedious and ...more
Kevin
What this book is NOT is "The Way to Truthful Relationships" or another take on everyday sociopathy.

What this book IS is an interesting (though less than fascinating) trip through a number of roles that deception plays in everyday life.

I suppose I feel a little...deceived...by the title, but as the book goes on to describe in quite clear writing is now I shouldn't have been surprised. Still, it is a worthwhile read for those unfamiliar with deceit, broadly framed.
Jen Liu
The books addressed the question 'liars in your life' by listing out all different types of lies in life. However, there's nowhere I can find 'the way to truthful relationship'. (maybe I missed the part as I started skipping pages towards the end since it became a little frustrating to read through study by study about lies?)

It's one of those sociological study books that are more suited for academic minds I guess.
Thing Two
Written by Robert Feldman, the Dean of Social and Behavioral Sciences at the University of Massachussets at Amherst, I selected this book in hopes of understanding the motivation of a person who lies, when it turns out I know her intimately, for she is me. Feldman's premise is that not only do we lie, but we teach our children to lie, and our society is extremely tolerant of it. Well researched and written.
Sasha
The first three quarters of the book were pretty cool, exploring the different areas in which people lie and giving very succinct scientific facts in an engaging way. It wasn't dumbed down or full of scientific jargon. But the last quarter turned into a moral/self-help book-y type weird stuff, which I didn't like at all, and which, frankly, took away from the whole thing.
Laura
This is a fascinating book, very engagingly written, but the title makes it sound like a self-help or relationship advice manual when it is really more a psychological study of human behavior. If you enjoyed books such as Daniel Gilbert's "Stumbling on Happiness" or anything by Meredith Small or Malcolm Gladwell, you are likely to find this entertaining and informative.
Andrea
While this looks like a self-help book, for me the more interesting parts are Feldman's discussions of the social and biological impulses that lead to lying, the role it plays in human societies and why it is a universal "vice." He brings in classic studies and also very recent research in a readable way.
Megan
The liar in your life is....everyone. And you aren't excluded from that list. The entire book is dedicated to the many reasons we lie, ranging from altruism to mental illness. After listening to the author characterize different forms of lying, I have been thinking about lies in a new way.
Cess Que
Deception is killer. This book tells why lies exist. I bough this after becoming a victim of a large-scale deceit, but after reading, this book doesn't give you the superpowers to detect lies but gives an insight of why there are lies. More of a socio-psych book. A fascinating read.
Wil Roese
People lie more than we think. We lie for many reasons including thrills, building our self esteem, being social and greed. One problem with the book is the authors constantly makes excuses for lies as a social norm as if you can not be social and honest at the same time.
Kim
kind of interesting to explore the everyday mini lies ("it's so nice to see you!") versus the more egregious ones ("no really-- I'm single!")

also goes into truth in advertising, politics, autobiographies.

sometimes tedious, but often fascinating
Thom
The gist - if something is important, assess the truth of it. The advice - try to be more honest. Lots of anecdotes, lots of psych studies, and an attempt to name each kind of lying - a "lie with intent" for instance. An interesting read.
Meg Trucano
I listened to this on a long car ride, and I was pleasantly surprised. It definitely changes how I think about lies of all kinds, and how frequently we all lie and are lied to--even without really realizing it.
Dennis Willingham
Not a relationship book as the title would make you think, but a lay persons introduction to some of Feldman's 25 years of research on lying. A lot of food for thought here
Elizabeth
So far - quite good and I like the anthropological/biological underpinnings cited for why & how we lie - and real-life examples of the different types of lies within society.
Jenny
It's ok, fun in the beginning, increasingly not as interesting and I skimmed the last third. I think my interest level was more at the article-level, not the book level.
Kam
at 1st, I liked it. Very clear. Good expression of thoughts. But then it didn't answer the title. It was about all the lying around us. It just went on and on about that.
Lauren
Very insightful. Not so much for the insight as to "why" people lie, but for insights as to why certain lies upset one more than other lies.
Yuki
I enjoyed reading and learning from this book. I think all you need to know about lies are in here. Definitely recommended.
Carla Ann
Loved reading about all the case studies involved in this book. Very good read!
Ester
Ester is currently reading it
Apr 28, 2015
Alice Pittacolo
Alice Pittacolo marked it as to-read
Apr 27, 2015
Prerana Nagchandi
Prerana Nagchandi marked it as to-read
Apr 14, 2015
« previous 1 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 next »
There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Be the first to start one »
  • Exuberance: The Passion for Life
  • Courage in Patience: A Story of Hope for Those Who Have Endured Abuse
  • Shyness: What It Is, What To Do About It
  • Mind Over Mind: The Surprising Power of Expectations
  • The Thinker's Thesaurus: Sophisticated Alternatives to Common Words
  • Long Life: Essays and Other Writings
  • Being with Dying: Cultivating Compassion and Fearlessness in the Presence of Death
  • Part Wild: One Woman's Journey with a Creature Caught Between the Worlds of Wolves and Dogs
  • The Five Things We Cannot Change: And the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them
  • Chess Rumble
  • Where We Got The Bible: Our Debt to the Catholic Church
  • Is It Me or My Meds?: Living with Antidepressants
  • Lying: Moral Choice in Public and Private Life
  • Pet Food Politics: The Chihuahua in the Coal Mine
  • Legacy of the Heart: The Spiritual Advantage of a  Painful Childhood
  • The Way We'll Be: The Zogby Report on the Transformation of the American Dream
  • On The Psychology Of Military Incompetence
  • A Beginner's Guide to Reality
284040
Robert S. Feldman is Dean in the College of Social and Behavioral Sciences, and Professor of Psychology at the University of Massachusetts Amherst. Feldman, who is winner of the College Distinguished Teacher award, has also taught courses at Mount Holyoke College, Wesleyan University, and Virginia Commonwealth University.

A Fellow of the American Psychological Association and the American Psycholo
...more
More about Robert S. Feldman...
Understanding Psychology Essentials of Understanding Psychology Psychology and Your Life Development Across the Life Span Child Development (5th Edition) (MyDevelopmentLab Series)

Share This Book