Against Love Against Love
Love is, as everyone knows, a mysterious and all-controlling force, with vast power over our thoughts and life decisions.
But isthere something a bit worrisome about all this uniformity of opinion? Is this the one subject about which no disagreement will be entertained, about which one truth alone is permissible? Consider that...more
"You can't leave the house without saying where you're going. You can't not say what time you'll return. You can't stay out past midnight, or eleven, or ten, or dinnertime, or not come right home after work. You can't go out when the other person feels like staying home. You can't go to parties alone. You can't go out just to go out, because you can't not be considerate...more
He then wrote me a note with his name and workplace, and told me to stop by sometime to swap books with him, because he, uh, likes to read too.
I'm so amused that this book, of all books, inspired that particular interaction. Kipnis is quite a provocateur, and she's also very, very funny. I related strongly to many...more
laura is writing a rant not a research paper but she's pulling her inspiration from philosopher/theorists, politics, religion, pop culture, the industrial revolution, current news headlines, su...more
1. Kipnis’ arch, ironic tone begins to wear thin about halfway through the first chapter. It might work for an article, but it’s far too precious to be tolerable for an entire book.
2. Kipnis isn’t really against love—she’s just against marriage. She’s actually very much in favor of the disruptive force of adulterous love.
3. The book is essentially the same argument presented over and over (marriage is boring and its primary purposes have more to do with...more
Kipnis frankly states that sh...more
Mmmmmm . . . as dark and bitter as a 70 percent cacao bar. I wouldn't want to consume a steady diet of this, but I enjoyed Kipnis's point of view. After all, if society insists so overwhelmingly that love is great and good and the whole point of living, then somebody needs to play devil's advocate. If you have ev...more
The essay is not too deep but entertaining enough. It is some one with a lot of education and a vagina admitting that being in a couple is sometimes (well, according to her, a permanent) dr...more
Readers will encounter shocking (and hard to refute) lines such as
In a commodity culture [love] conforms to the role of a cheap commodity, spit out at the end of the assembly line in cookie-cutter forms, marketed to the bored and alienated producer-consumer...more
I especially like the nine-page catalog of everything you can't do because you're in a couple: "You can't leave the house without saying where you're going. You can't go out to play pinball, it's regressive. You can't be impulsive, self-absorbed, or distracted. You can't not laugh at their jokes in public..."
-"I liked Clinton for his economy, but I can't stand him foolin' around on his wife," said the married man before asking me if I'd be interested in spending a night with him.
-"You're trouble," remarked too many men for inexplicable reasons. Must be Taylor Swift fans.
-"I'd give you babies."
-"It's not like my girlfriend would notice if we hooked up."
Are you coupled? Read this.
Are you an adulterer? Read this.
Do you reject the idea of marriage out of hand? Read this.
Are you single and think couples are happier? Read this.
I guess this book would be a...more
In one funny section, the author writes "a brief sample of answers to the simple question: 'What can't you do because you're in a couple?'...
You can't leave the house without saying where you're going...You can't not say what time you'll return...You can't go out when the other person feels like staying home...You can't be a slob...You can't leave your (pick one) books, tissue...more
But, I did manage to follow Kipnis' main point, which I boiled down thusly in my own words: are acting like an "adult" and acting on the impulses of your body, mind, and soul mutually exclusive? Why is morality inexorably tie...more
I shouldn't have read this book directly after rea...more