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9th out of 33 books
—
25 voters
Raising Your Spirited Child REV Ed
Newly revised, featuring the most up-to-date research, effective strategies, and real-life stories
The spirited child--often called "difficult" or "strong-willed"--possesses traits we value in adults yet find challenging in children. Research shows that spirited kids are wired to be "more"--by temperament, they are more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent, and uncomf...more
The spirited child--often called "difficult" or "strong-willed"--possesses traits we value in adults yet find challenging in children. Research shows that spirited kids are wired to be "more"--by temperament, they are more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent, and uncomf...more
ebook, 496 pages
Published
February 24th 2009
by HarperCollins
(first published 2009)
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I found a LOT to really like about this book. There were moments when it actually brought me to tears, because what I was reading was, for once, EXACTLY like reading about my kid...and my reactions. In fact, I'm going to make my husband read this because I think there are some really important observations we can use to be better parents for our spunky/spirited child.
There are parts of the book that don't apply to us, which I think would be the case for many parents. But what parenting book is...more
There are parts of the book that don't apply to us, which I think would be the case for many parents. But what parenting book is...more
Read this book and I swear its written about my oldest son! Really helped me understand him and better deal with some of the issues we were having. I completely changed my way of discipline and also changed some of the situations where I realised he would become over stimulated and therefore this would cause problems. Having read this book after a few months of me changing my patterns and the things we did he became a different child. I recommend this to any parent that has a spirited child, it...more
This book was recommended to me by the fine folks at UW-CHDD, as a result of some discussion I had with them about my son (who they felt might be 'spirited'). It is one of the most helpful parenting books I've read, period, and certainly the best one lately.
Interestingly, by the books definition, I'm not sure I would call my son 'spirited'. This personality is defined as having strong expression of a number of different traits. From my perspective, my son only has a couple of those traits (but...more
Interestingly, by the books definition, I'm not sure I would call my son 'spirited'. This personality is defined as having strong expression of a number of different traits. From my perspective, my son only has a couple of those traits (but...more
I cried when I started this book. It was such a relief to know that there were other parents out there like me, with kids like mine! It was validating to know that some children DO require more input than others: I felt like my hard work was finally recognized.
As I continued, what stood out, even beyond the helpful advice and tips for handling the intense traits of a spirited child, was her positive perspective. I was able to shed the burden I was feeling about having a "spirited" child and loo...more
As I continued, what stood out, even beyond the helpful advice and tips for handling the intense traits of a spirited child, was her positive perspective. I was able to shed the burden I was feeling about having a "spirited" child and loo...more
This excellent nonfiction book helps parents understand and enjoy their "spirited" child. These approximately 10% of children have the extreme attributes of INTENSITY, PERSISTENCE, SENSITIVITY, PERCEPTIVENESS, and SLOWNESS-TO-ADAPT. These five, along with other "bonus" attributes (irregularity, energy, first reaction, and mood) make up the personality of a spirited child, and by understanding how your child processes things and what their "triggers" are, you can help them better cope.
I loved thi...more
I loved thi...more
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This book is fantastic. If you think you have a kid who is More, I can't recommend this one highly enough.
Toby has always been an intense child - even in the womb he was a nutball. I was at the end of my rope a few weeks ago and truly did not know what to do with this kid - nothing ever works. No really, nothing I have ever tried discipline wise has ever helped. Except for screaming - we told him if he screamed a bear would eat him. This cut down on 90% of the screaming, but I'm not really want...more
Toby has always been an intense child - even in the womb he was a nutball. I was at the end of my rope a few weeks ago and truly did not know what to do with this kid - nothing ever works. No really, nothing I have ever tried discipline wise has ever helped. Except for screaming - we told him if he screamed a bear would eat him. This cut down on 90% of the screaming, but I'm not really want...more
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I have at least 2 highly spirited children (the jury's still out on the baby), and a friend recommended this book to me. It's saved her life and her marriage, apparently, and I can see why. "Highly spirited" is actually a thing which is frequently diagnosed as being ADHD or even mild autism. It's characterized by sleep issues, dramatic emotional highs and lows, and boundless energy. When my oldest, now 8, was a baby and toddler, I thought I was going to go insane dealing with him because of thes...more
Of the books based on this research (The Strong Willed Child, The Difficult Child, there are probably more) This one is either the clearest and most practical, or I've read the others so much the repetition of advise is finally sinking in.
I think it's hysterical how the descriptive terms for children with this constellation of temperment traits have changed over the years; "Mother-killer" to Strong Willed, to Difficult to Spirited. Of course, we must be careful to not label children, of course f...more
I think it's hysterical how the descriptive terms for children with this constellation of temperment traits have changed over the years; "Mother-killer" to Strong Willed, to Difficult to Spirited. Of course, we must be careful to not label children, of course f...more
"Spirited" is the author's way of describing strong-willed, intense, sensitive kids, like mine. While it is a bit short on practical, "how to" advice, it really excels at helping you understand your child. The author obviously has a compassionate heart for children and gave me more insight into why my kids act the way they do than anything else I've read. I have found that very helpful and has helped me stop taking a lot of their misbehavior personally. The author is big on preventing problems a...more
I'm only halfway through, but this book is completely changing my view of 16 month old Lucas, and also helping me to understand Brian and myself. Rather than using negative labels (crazy, getting into everything, making messes), I am learning to use positive words and labels (he's energetic, curious, tender-hearted, intense, etc.) to describe him and his personality. I need to post all of the positive words on the fridge to remind me to use them. Research shows that labels affect children and th...more
I LOVED this book! I have a spirited child and it has taken me a lot of years to figure out the things that work for him and the things that don't. It was great to hear about other kids that are the exact same way, not ADD, but just more intense. He is more sensitive, more energetic, more perceptive, and more curious than all my other children put together. It was nice to hear that it is just who he is and he is not trying to drive me into insanity. I learned so much about his personality and mi...more
A friend recommended this book to me a couple of years ago and I really wish I'd read it then -- it might have saved me a little trouble over the years. This book gave me a lot of insight into understanding the temperament and behavior of a child who I used to call "difficult" or "challenging" but who I will now refer to as "spirited". Kurcinka gives tips on new ways to look at a child's personality traits, and lots of strategies for dealing with behavioral issues. Most of her suggestions are ea...more
When someone recommended this book to me I was hesitant to read it. Partly because I had already read one of her books, and also because I wasn't sure about labelling either of my children as 'spirited'. After reading the book I changed my mind; there were many good, practical tips for working with your kids that I'm already putting into practice with my kids. Even if you don't think your kids are 'spirited' you could benefit from reading this book (or her other one: Kids, Parents, and Power Str...more
This book completely changed the way I viewed myself as a parent and my daughter. My husband was deployed and I was feeling like I couldn't handle our daughter and this really helped me to see I wasn't a bad parent and that some kids are just more spirited than others! It taught me to see the outcome of situations before they happened and how to avoid them. Now she is 6 and I understand her so well and we dont have the misunderstandings we used to at all!
Loved many of the ideas and psychology behind it. However, I don't particularly agree with the author's view on discipline. It seemed like there were quite a few excuses for defiance and poor behavior. Despite this, strongly recommend reading it for parents of spirited kids. One more suggestion...I wish the chapter on sleep was earlier in the book. That would actually enable parents time to get through the book quicker it kid was sleeping.
I really REALLY appreciated this book. Not many people seem to fully understand what it's like to have a spirited child. You're working with a different set of circumstances and need different tactics as a parent to cope with them. Because not everyone understands, it can be difficult to get the information you need or the strategies that help you harness all that extra energy and spirit into positive channels. I loved this book!
Whether you have the perfect child or not, this is an interesting read. Kurcinka gives you so many good ideas about how to raise your spirited child. Although none of my boys completely classify as a spirited child from my "diagnosis," each of them certainly have some components and I have learned some good ways of working with each of them to better function as a family.
I would highly suggest all parents read this book.
I would highly suggest all parents read this book.
Great book, with real helpful realistic strategies. Although there will be parts that don't apply to your child specifically it is great as a whole. I especially liked the fact that it had tips on how to help you child understand him or herself, and to learn how to take care of their needs in a positive way. If you have a child that is MORE it is an essential read, but many of the strategies or ideas apply to any kid.
I think that I must have got the edited version for audible because it was quite short. But after reading this I learned that my kids are not as bad as so many other kids out there and i shouldn't complain. My children are not sensitive in some of the ways other children are, but I learned some techniques and ideas about what to do about helping them in the ways that I can.
An excellent book for parents of children with "spirit." Better suited for children who can verbally communicate, but does show you how to lay a foundation with younger children. The book is full of real life stories and examples and gives completely doable strategies for being a proactive parent instead of a reactive parent.
Not everything in this book is relevant to my kids, but I expect that in a parenting book. I found it to be a fairly easy read, with enough anecdotes to keep it from being too dry. And, most importantly, enough relevant information and concrete ideas that I started using some with my kids right away, and look forward to reading important (to me) bits of this book again and again. If you have a child who is "more" .... more spirited, more energetic, more intense, more sensitive or perceptive, it...more
It's taken me a long time to read this, I think because there's so much information to digest. It has helped me be a better parent, however, by teaching me patience with my child--I spend more time easing him into things that are difficult. I've been giving myself permission to spend this extra time instead of expecting him to toe the line, and that has made my life better. I loved some of her strategies for calming your child, putting them to bed (spirited children need sleep even more than nor...more
Amazing book. This really helped me to view my daughter in a different light. I noticed a difference in her when I started using some of the techniques. My husband has read her other book about power struggles, but I haven't...yet. I suggest every parent read this book.
This book has changed our house. It's such a relief to understand myself and my kids more and be able to head the 3 year old tantrum off at the pass. More hugs, more talking, more listening. No yelling, no water-boarding (that's a joke, folks!). I bought the ePub version for myself then went back for a paper copy for the Mister. Worth every cent.
Both of my children have been quite a challenge to me. I adore and enjoy them, however could never fully understand them. Through out the years I have been given advice on how to discipline my son, and it seemed that his attitude and behavior would get worse every time I followed these suggestions. Reading this book has given me insight to a completely new way of living with my children. They aren't misbehaved, uncontrollable, hyper children... they're Spirited children. The qualities that make...more
I joke that this book may have saved my life. It certainly saved my sanity and gave me the affirmation I wasn't getting from anyone in my family. My relationship has changed dramatically (for the better) with my daughter.
This book is a must-read for any parent with a spirited child. Very helpful in changing one's perception of the child and the child's own perception of herself... Which is key in appreciating and enjoying life with such an intense little person!!
Some good info and food for thought. Loved the part about introvert vs. extrovert and how parents need to pay attention to kids' energy needs like we do their sleep or nutritional needs.--------------Starting this one to try to get some more tools in my parenting tool bag. Hoping it'll give me some good insights on why my kiddo reacts to the world the way she does and how I can help her navigate the world around her with fewer struggles for everyone involved.
Excellent book on how to help children who are extra-sensitive, extra-active, etc. I would probably have given it more stars if I'd read it when my child was a toddler or preschooler - wish I'd known more then!
Interestingly, though, it also showed me how many of the same traits and preferences *I* have and didn't realize it!
Interestingly, though, it also showed me how many of the same traits and preferences *I* have and didn't realize it!
There is something for every parent and teacher in this book, whether their child qualifies as spirited or not (FYI, Owen possesses all 4 bonus traits, so I've got me a piece of work!). Its theme is working with the child's temperament to set them up for success, because essentially every trait that is difficult to parent is a positive trait we value in adults. It's all in how you spin it, and all in how you respect, not control, the child. Loved this!
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