Raising Real Men: Surv...

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Hal Young

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Raising Real Men: Surviving, Teaching And Appreciating Boys

by Hal Young (Goodreads Author), Melanie Young (Goodreads Author)

4.16 of 5 stars 4.16 · rating details · 49 ratings · 13 reviews

"Six boys!" folks say in mock horror, "Well, better you than me."
We answer them cheerfully - we love our boys and they're a gift from God...a reward.

Privately, though, we admit to ourselves it's not always rosy. Teenaged boys put away a startling amount of groceries. Young boys can be downright destructive. They're noisy, unconcerned with personal hygiene, and the dog has...more

Paperback, 253 pages

Published by Great Waters Press

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Nov 14, 2011 Evelyn rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: philosophy

Growing up as I did, with two younger sisters and no brothers, boys have always been somewhat of a mystery to me. I am not confident enough to say with Miss Pole from Cranford, “My father was a man; I think I know the sex.” Being a mother of a boy for eight years has taught me a lot, but I don’t like the idea of figuring everything out after the fact when it’s too late for the oldest son. So yes, I read parenting books. Lots of them. And my oldest boy is always the one who inspires me to read mo...more Growing up as I did, with two younger sisters and no brothers, boys have always been somewhat of a mystery to me. I am not confident enough to say with Miss Pole from Cranford, “My father was a man; I think I know the sex.” Being a mother of a boy for eight years has taught me a lot, but I don’t like the idea of figuring everything out after the fact when it’s too late for the oldest son. So yes, I read parenting books. Lots of them. And my oldest boy is always the one who inspires me to read more of them.

I’ll give the biggest caveat of any parenting book first. Take what works and don’t worry about the rest. If you get a few good ideas that work wonders in your own home, then the book was worth it. I agreed with most of what the authors said in this one, but not everything.

This one is very Christian-based. This book has a specific view-point which I found quite helpful. They talk about the role of men as leaders, heads of households, soldiers, physical laborers, and the like. (Yes, girls can and do follow those roles as well, but we’re just focusing on boys here.) They argue that boys have been given God-given traits to help them in these roles, but in childhood and adolescence (and in adulthood as well if they are not trained otherwise) those traits manifest themselves as arrogant, reckless, noisy, destructive, aggressive, defiant, violent, unbounded energy. It takes training and effort (on both the parents’ and the child’s parts) to turn those into the leadership skills, courage, and strength (both physical and otherwise) that the man will need to fulfill his various responsibilities in life.

A few ideas I particularly liked: Give boys the opportunity to take ‘risks’. No, don’t let them play in the busy street, but allow them to do things that make them feel strong, responsible, daring, and adventurous.

I love the idea of using history and literature to find good heroes rather than sports and popular entertainment. (They specifically mentioned William Wilberforce in a list of historical heroes!) And I only read the first few pages of the chapter on toy guns and swords because they were basically reiterating what I already thought. (Boys should be allowed to play with toy weapons, but also taught to respect and handle them properly to train them for the real thing.)

I liked the chapter called ‘Who’s in charge here?’ They talked about how to begin developing leadership traits by giving responsibility and emphasising that future leaders must ‘pay their due’. In other words, they must learn to obey before they can lead. Most great leaders, generals, etc. in history paid their dues by working as clerks, soldiers in the infantry, and what have you, and they learned many skills in these positions that helped them later on. But as parents, we also can help them learn to be leaders by letting them take charge in certain situations, giving them more and more control as they show they are ready for it.

They covered manners and hygene; striking the proper balance between being a smelly, burping slob wearing five-day-old underwear and being a magazine cover fop with his hair just so. They covered sex education, and how to help young men deal with temptation, and they ended with a chapter on how to help young men prepare for college life, marriage, and adulthood in general.

There were too many helpful pointers in this book to really go through them all. I am glad I read it, and I would recommend it to any moms out there who want to be better equipped to understand and raise their sons to be strong, upstanding, virtuous men.(less)

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Jan 01, 2010 Mandy rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: all-time-favs, blog-reviews, i-own, mandys-reads

Biblical, amazing, real, fresh, practical, helpful, encouraging...

These are just a few of the words I would use to describe this newly released book for parents of boys.

Raising Real Men is written by Hal and Melanie Young who are parents of 8 children, the oldest 6 being boys. The daunting task of raising little boys into God-fearing men is more of an exciting adventure than a frustrating duty as shown in the pages of this book.

Hal and Melanie talk about the difference between boys and girls and...more Biblical, amazing, real, fresh, practical, helpful, encouraging...

These are just a few of the words I would use to describe this newly released book for parents of boys.

Raising Real Men is written by Hal and Melanie Young who are parents of 8 children, the oldest 6 being boys. The daunting task of raising little boys into God-fearing men is more of an exciting adventure than a frustrating duty as shown in the pages of this book.

Hal and Melanie talk about the difference between boys and girls and give practical tips of how parents, Moms in particular, can raise boys to be strong and real men with out going crazy through the process. They address such issues as: boys and their play, the need for good heroes, when to comfort and when to encourage boys, responsibility and freedom, guns and weapons, obedience and authority, healthy competition, manners, finances, education and college, and the topic we like to avoid and blushingly call "the birds and the bees".

All the issues and topics in this book are approached with a Biblical mindset and their thoughts and convictions are well written out and shared with the reader in a kind and friend-to-friend manner. While Raising Real Men is also written from the view of a homeschooling family, I found all the concepts still applicable to those of us not homeschooling our children and those of us with smaller families or fewer boys. I know that not everyone who reads this book will agree with all of what the Youngs share, but I do think it is a book well worth any parent's time due to the thoughtful and thorough nature of the contents.

I personally give this book 5 stars, not because it is the most well written book I have ever read, but because it is one of the very few Biblical, honest, and refreshing parenting books I have ever read. While Hal and Melanie share openly about where they stand, they do not come across as forcing their beliefs down the throats of their readers nor do they overdose on tips and how-to's that can differ so much from family to family. Instead, I felt as if I were sitting in their living room, chatting with them as a couple about the journey of parenting boys.

My book is well highlighted, underlined, starred, and dog-eared. I appreciated much about each chapter, but my favorite chapter was titled "Love and War". In this chapter the did a tremendous job of talking about raising boys to be pure - from birth to marriage. They handled this topic with such dignity and respect all the while being open and honest. I was impressed with their approach in teaching their boys about the differences between boys and girls and how to handle specific situations dealing with this general subject.

As a parent of three children, wife of a pastor, and an avid reader and learner, I want to encourage all parents to read this book. Even if your husband won't read it, I still highly suggest mothers read it to get a better understanding on boys in general that Hal and Melanie so wonderfully explain. And if you happen to be a homeschooling parent, I recommend this book to you even more highly!

* * * * *

I want to thank Hal & Melanie Young for the copies to review and giveaway.
(less)

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Feb 17, 2013 Renee rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: non-fiction

An informative read, made completely enjoyable by the authors' humor, candor, and the Southerner's gift for turning a phrase. Having hosted the Young family, including their 4 youngest sons and 2 daughters, I can attest to the fact that their children are as polite, well-spoken, and boisterous as this book claims. My 5 year-old son has never enjoyed overnight guests more!
I appreciate all the wisdom and experience they've packed into the chapters, but I would spread it more equally across both g...more

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Jan 15, 2012 Kristen rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: parenting, kindle

I'm so thankful for a book that helped me understand where my son is coming from. I read this book aloud to my husband and we both enjoyed it. Very practical information and advice based around Biblical principles. I will go back to this one from time to time to be refreshed on the information.

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Jun 27, 2012 Courtney rated it 3 of 5 stars

Nothing earth shutting in it but still a lot to think about. I wish they had spent a chapter talking about the early years up to the age of 9. That seems to be the magic year for them with chores and expectations. I am struggling with how to work with my 3 year old as a future man, not crushing his spirit, but already trying to reign him in. I look forward to implementing some of their ideas. Overall, I appreciated the calling of raising boys with the expectation of them becoming men one day

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Sep 28, 2011 Kimberly rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: parenting

Very good Christ-centered parenting book. Gave me lots to think about.

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Jul 09, 2012 Ginger rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: parenting

A must read for Christians with boys. Or anyone with boys.

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Sep 07, 2010 Corie rated it 5 of 5 stars

By far the BEST book I have read on raising up Godly men!

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Jan 05, 2010 Melanie Young rated it 5 of 5 stars · (Review from the author)

We wrote it, so I'll have to give it five stars :-)

1 like · like · see review

Dec 08, 2012 Dawn rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: read-adult

Good helpful down-to-earth book for parents of boys (moms especially).

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Sep 08, 2010 Redlanternlady rated it 3 of 5 stars

A great book for anyone with boys. Full of real life examples that I thought were really good in teaching and training boys to be godly young men.

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Apr 13, 2012 Chantelle rated it 5 of 5 stars

This was a fantastic book with real insight and Bible based wisdom for parents trying to raise godly men! I will definetly be referring back to this one!

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May 08, 2013 Teya Miller rated it 5 of 5 stars

Excellent book! We have three awesome boys, and I'm glad I read this book while they're still rather young.

1 like · like · see review

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Shelves: christian-living, raising-boys

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