Sign in with Facebook
Loading...
96th out of 162 books
—
82 voters
Born for Love: Why Empathy Is Essential--and Endangered
An inside look at the power of empathy: "Born for Love" is an unprecedented exploration of how and why the brain learns to bond with others--and a stirring call to protect our children from new threats to their capacity to love
From birth, when babies' fingers instinctively cling to those of adults, their bodies and brains seek an intimate connection, a bond made possible b...more
From birth, when babies' fingers instinctively cling to those of adults, their bodies and brains seek an intimate connection, a bond made possible b...more
Hardcover, 384 pages
Published
April 6th 2010
by William Morrow
(first published 2010)
Friend Reviews
To see what your friends thought of this book,
please sign up.
Community Reviews
(showing
1-30
of
667)
Perry is an international expert on how childhood trauma, and uses concrete examples to show how abuse or neglect leaves developmental gaps in children's brains.
Without empathy the ability to love is lost. These kids are desperate for love, but their ability to learn is deficient due to the trauma and chaos of the first four years of life, during which their brains were literally organizing. Perry tells us how every single religion of the world tells us to treat others as we would want to be tre...more
Without empathy the ability to love is lost. These kids are desperate for love, but their ability to learn is deficient due to the trauma and chaos of the first four years of life, during which their brains were literally organizing. Perry tells us how every single religion of the world tells us to treat others as we would want to be tre...more
In Born For Love: Why Empathy is Essential and Endangered Bruce Perrry states what seem so obvious, but nevertheless important, we need to appreciate and nurture our ability to love and connect.
Bruce Perry says it again, we are wired to connect to one another though eye gaze, facial expressions, touch, neurotransmitters being released, etc. He sounds the alarm on our current childcare behaviors. Children left to television sets, computer screens, overcrowded daycares, etc. are not engaging and...more
Bruce Perry says it again, we are wired to connect to one another though eye gaze, facial expressions, touch, neurotransmitters being released, etc. He sounds the alarm on our current childcare behaviors. Children left to television sets, computer screens, overcrowded daycares, etc. are not engaging and...more
I have a bias toward things that deal with empathy -- it's a very Christian (and generally religious) concept, and I stand by it. This book was great b/c it approaches empathy from a scientific perspective, using biological, sociological, economic, medical, and psychological studies to state that 1) empathy is biologically rooted in our bodies through our stress response (or the mediation of that response) and 2) that empathy must be triggered by our social relationships, most often in early chi...more
view 1 comment
Something that seems to be missing in our world is considering the feelings of other people as we interact each day. I also feel the stress of living in a fearful and very uncertain world while I also recognize the value of what others have provided for me. I still need other people in my life and world, because I cannot deal qwith everything in life myself. i need people I can trust and i nned to be able to recognize who can be trusted. These are all functions of empathy and being mindfull of o...more
This is an awesome book. Even though I usually stay as far away from psychiatrists as possible, with this guy I have to make an exception. I would go so far as to say that if I had the chance I'd go and work for him-for free, if necessary!Anybody who is interested in issues regarding child-abuse-or, let's call it what it is, TERRORISM- needs to read this book. I only discovered it via Andrew Vachss' "False Allegations" in which he mentions Dr. Perry.[THANKS FOR THAT!!!]
The real beauty of this pi...more
The real beauty of this pi...more
I didn't find "Born for Love" as tightly written as the authors' other effort "The Boy Who was Raised as a Dog"; there was a fair amount of repeated material within the book.
Still, I enjoyed the book & there were many fascinating tidbits. The overall message is that relationships matter, love matters, and early experiences are foundational (even to the point of altering DNA expression via epigenetics).
I thought the authors relied too heavily on anthropologist Sarah Hrdy's theories. Hrdy arg...more
Still, I enjoyed the book & there were many fascinating tidbits. The overall message is that relationships matter, love matters, and early experiences are foundational (even to the point of altering DNA expression via epigenetics).
I thought the authors relied too heavily on anthropologist Sarah Hrdy's theories. Hrdy arg...more
An extremely relevant book for our society today. These authors clearly “get it”.
One of the best reductionist arguments I have ever seen for why “Love” is so important. Using various findings from neuroscience, the authors explain the picture that is emerging from this research and the practical implications for our society, including: methods of child rearing, our living in a highly mobile technological society, and our current response to social problems – among other things.
People (and some a...more
One of the best reductionist arguments I have ever seen for why “Love” is so important. Using various findings from neuroscience, the authors explain the picture that is emerging from this research and the practical implications for our society, including: methods of child rearing, our living in a highly mobile technological society, and our current response to social problems – among other things.
People (and some a...more
I was intrigued by Born for Love, but I did not expect to love and appreciate it as much as I did! The writing style was approachable and engaging, as Perry & Szalavitz alternate between explaining concepts of early childhood attachment & development and giving specific case examples. Perry and Szalavitz discuss how empathy is developed (or hindered) and how we can nurture the seeds of empathy, citing many relevant, recent, and critical research studies. They also discuss the long-term i...more
This book was insightful to me, on both a personal and a societal level. It helped me understand better the challenges I've faced as someone who didn't get quite enough empathy growing up, and why I've struggled with the effects as an adult. The greater perspective on US social and cultural problems was intense. If you're not so sure that gun control is a stand-alone answer to some of our great tragedies, this book would give you a lot to consider.
In some ways,it changed the way I view my world. In other ways, it reinforced what I already believed. Overall, it helped me appreciate our humanness and make me want to connect with others in a deeper way. I wish the whole world would read this book.
What a great book, seriously. It was interesting to find out about the psychology behind empathy. Empathy is such a simple concept but it's beyond vital. I did a deeper review on my blog if you'd like to check it out.
A very satisfying read. I am now officially a huge fan of Dr. Bruce Perry. This book covers a lot of bases. Perry uses his impressive clinical experience and the latest in neuroscience advances to explore everything from autism to psychopathy to the outcome of various forms of childhood neglect and "adverse childhood events" and comes to some fascinating conclusions of what this means about human nature, treatment and prevention approaches and society in general. Perry and Szalavitz go on from t...more
I'm still in the middle of it, but it's very eye-opening so far. I think anyone who is a parent, or about to be a parent, or interested in psychology or how we raise our children should read this book.
Incredible. Life Changing. Mind altering. Powerful. Is that enough positive about this book? Like his other book, not a "happy" or easy read, but an amazing book.
This book was enjoyable and informative. However, it wasn't as good as their first book. If you had to choose I'd recommend the other one, but this one is good too.
This is an outstanding description of the latest research that explores how empathy plays a key role our development as individuals and the shaping of our society.
This insightful and interesting read caused me to think about what I want to do with my time. The line "... we live our lives in relationships" resonates with me.
Dec 29, 2012
Allison Kroll
added it
Follow up to The Boy Who was Raised as a Dog. Equally informative and enlightening yet easy to read.
Dr. Perry truly explains brain trauma and emotional needs so very well. A truly gifted educational experience to be found in each of his books.
Bruce Perry is a child trauma guru, and he and his co-author use that background to talk about how empathy is developed and interfered with. The book is easily readable and interesting, and made me think more about the ways I support the relationships in my life, and about how I can use these ideas in my work with kids.
Jul 17, 2011
Edith Cook
added it
Worth reading twice--or three times
By a renowned child psychologist, this book is a fascinating exploration of empathy: how it develops, why it's important, and how things can go wrong (examples drawn from the author's patients, including psychopaths, juvenile murderers, compulsive liars and the like). It's also rather disturbing, both for the descriptions of abysmal parenting practices, and because after you read it you will see milder versions of the same everywhere you go. An excellent argument in favor of mandatory parenting...more
I read this because I loved the first book that these two wrote together titled "The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog." I was not disappointed. The authors make a strong argument for why empathy is essential in every area of our lives from parenting to the economy. The book is filled with interesting and compelling true stories of individuals that are dealing with the fallout from a lack of empathy in their lives. It is a very enjoyable and compelling read, I highly recommend it for anyone and everyo...more
An interesting set of stories about how we develop empathy. There was a lot of good stuff about brain development and the long term effects of the early interactions in our lives; it's amazing how much who we turn out to be is the product of how we are physically and emotionally tended to as babies. Also good stuff about how societal structuring and its effects on stress levels of individuals impacts our capacity for empathy.
So much food for thought!
Why is empathy essential? .... Read the book it's very inclusive
I didn't like this book as much as The Boy Who... While the information is presented well, I'm not sure I found it interesting enough to read a whole book. Perhaps a couple of chapters in a book, but reading the whole thing felt like a stretch. Which may say more about me and my interests than the book.
I love Bruce Perry...his work is exceptional and I will read anything that comes out with his name on it.
This was Another great book about the evolution of empathy, compassion and love. The book is so rich in knowledge based on solid research that it is worth the read.
This was Another great book about the evolution of empathy, compassion and love. The book is so rich in knowledge based on solid research that it is worth the read.
I really didn't know what this book was about when I purchased it. But by the first chapter I was hooked. While based on clinical experience it was entirely readable. Being the mother of three year old twins I found it very applicable to the raising of our children.
I love Bruce Perry, and I learned a lot from this book. Once again, he has got my wheels turning about what his research and insight mean to me as a Mom and as a social worker. This book was about empathy.
There are no discussion topics on this book yet.
Be the first to start one »
