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Admit One

4.0 of 5 stars 4.00  ·  rating details  ·  912 ratings  ·  137 reviews
When high school teacher Tom Smith meets Kevin Bannerman at a gay club, he violates his own rule: one-night stands only. But when the weekend is over, he walks away, reminding himself that he lives a deeply closeted life for painful, compelling reasons. He keeps his secrets, his heart, and the cause of his crippled arm to himself, but almost immediately he bitterly regrets ...more
Paperback, 350 pages
Published November 13th 2009 by Dreamspinner Press (first published 2009)
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(showing 1-30 of 1,740)
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Heidi Cullinan
This is one of those reviews where I feel like I can say nothing or have to go on for an hour and a half. I don't have an hour and a half, but I can't say nothing.

This is a book well done, is the bottom line, and what I love is that it's a book only an m/m author and an m/m house like Dreamspinner will give you. It has heart. It has edges. It will lift you up and open you up, but you will be okay when it's over. It has beautiful, well-written sex scenes which are, as they should be in all novels
...more
Yvonne
Tom Smith is a history teacher in a conservative small Texan town who has carved out & compartmentalized what he considers a safe life. In the town where he lives people know him but don't really know him. He has kept the fact that he's a gay a secret & periodically travels miles out of town for sexual interactions with other gay men. It is during one of these forays out of town that he meets Kevin Bannerman & his vision of what his world is really like starts to crumble.

It is when
...more
Richard
I loved this book.

A stunning story of a man's life after surviving a violent crime and the wreckage that follows.

But for me, it was mostly a story of transformation.
From blame to acceptance, shame to courage, fear to trust, victim to survivor.

No book since Nor Iron Bars a Cage has affected me as much.

And it was awfully sexy and romantic too.
GymGuy
I have mixed feelings about this book. I'd like to give it 4-stars, but I just can't.

Here's the positive. It's technically well written and edited. Unlike many in this genre, I found little if any grammatical or punctuation errors. That's a good start. The character development was certainly their and both Tom and Kevin seemed real. It had a great opening and conclusion.

However...who was it who said (Cecil B. DeMille?) the three most important ingredients in a movie are plot, plot and plot? Well
...more
Adrian Anderson
What a breath of fresh air this book has been after the last several reading fiascos. No book is perfect but somehow the little niggles that may have been present in this book didn't really bother me at all. Miss Sinclair (and her editor(s)) must really be commended for the lack of spelling and grammatical errors that all too often take away from the work in this genre.

I found I enjoyed her characters a lot. Kevin's relentless drive and refusal to give up, Tom and his tragically insecure past, G
...more
Librarian Kate
Wow. Just amazing. This is the kind of story that reminds me why I love m/m fiction so much - it could only have happened between two men, with the personal and social dynamics that make m/m unique. I won't reprise the plot again; others have done that better than I could, but I kept getting stunned by a phrase, a description, a conversation that rang so true, I felt I was in the room with the characters. It's not a blindingly original plot: closeted character meets chance hookup in his home tow ...more
Lara
Kevin had been born to make love to a man, the same way I had.

This is the story of high school history teacher Tom Smith. He has been living a heartbreakingly lonely and closeted life for the last 16 years. He has lived in fear in his perfectly constructed life in the small town of Gunning, Texas since he graduated college. He meets banker Kevin Bannerman during one of his every few months trips to Houston and through a series of coincidences his one night stand is now invading his personal sp
...more
Deeze
I was not really in the mood for this when I started, but it turned out not to be the nightmare I'd imagined. The story of Tom and Kevin was sweet, although I do agree it was long winded in places. It certainly wouldn't of hurt to cut the story by a 100 pages or so. The long build up to Tom's past dragged in places and made Tom seem whiny. But the big secret surounding Tom was very well written, and extremely emotional. I shed tears lol.

Over all a 3 and a half star read that I'm bumping up to 4
...more
Jeff Adams
I picked up Admit One because of this line from its blurb: “Months later, while Tom serves as reluctant assistant director for his school’s production of Rent, he fears that the show’s same-sex love angle will somehow out him.” Of course the word Rent jumped out and the book was purchase was immediate.

I’m so glad I did. This was a wonderful, multi-layered book.

Tom Smith teaches high school history in Gunning, Texas, a small, conservative town. Tom is very closeted, traveling for hours to Houston
...more
LenaLena
I don't quite know what to say about this book, or even how many stars to give. I'll go in the middle or something. It was good, but it wasn't good. At least not for me.

The closest I can get to describing my unease with this book is that it felt like a made-for-tv-movie. While it wasn't quite 100 on a scale of 1 to Amy Lane, it was close enough that it felt like the writer really. wanted. to. make. me. FEEL. it. Cry, you beeyatch! And then everyone pulled through and banded together and importa
...more
Nic
This is the story of Tom, a man with a traumatic past, who has put his life on hold for the last 16 years. Kevin is the man who starts to break through the walls that Tom as built around himself.

Tom develops feelings for Kevin but is frightened to let him come too close. In the past he has only had one night stands, separating his day-to-day life from his sex life. He has not had a romantic relationship, or any other real relationship, since he was in college. He believes they can't have a futu
...more
Ami
It's too bad that I will never had the chance to watch the Broadway version of RENT since I don't live in the U.S. though I remember the movie. I think this book, taking the spirit of RENT about love and acceptance of one self, is beautifully written.

Told from 1st point of view of Tom Smith, a teacher who lives a very closeted (and lonely life), where he travels to other town when he feels the need to have sex with somebody. Until he agrees (albeit reluctantly) to help with the RENT drama play
...more
R.B.
First I'd like to say that I don't want to discourage anyone from reading this book :)

* * *

I finished it. I'm a little puzzled, I really don't know what to say... Maybe only that:

With the number of pages I read I was more and more frustrated with Tom's behavior. I didn't know what happend to him, only that it was ugly. When I finally found out I was shocked. I really don't know how I acted in his place... I appreciate his progress and that he began to heal and to change his attitude slowly.

I adm
...more
Aiko
You lot didn't see this 5star coming, after the rant-party in my status updates, did you? ^.^

It's a long time since I've read a book in this genre that have such a gutpunch to it as this one. At points I was highly annoyed with the narrator, and I was infuriated with the community of the small Texas town. But more than that, the main characters are wonderfully drawn, the country is vividly painted, and the story is one of a kind. It broke my heart and gave me hope :)

I'm not going to try and wri
...more
Shelby
Here’s where I run into trouble. This story is fantastically well written and I enjoyed it. In fact it’s even very believable. Here’s the but though. Even though I understood why, I still wanted to smack one of the main characters for 90% of the book. It’s the only thing keeping this from being a 5 star read for me.

Tom Smith has spent most of his life hiding his preferences and burying any thoughts of ever being able to have someone permanent in his life. As a high school teacher in small town
...more
Xandra
This is a quiet book about a quiet, lonely man whose only wish is to go unnoticed through life and draw as little attention as possible. He doesn’t have hopes and dreams of a better tomorrow. All he’s got is loneliness and deep-seated fear. Fear of what people might think of him, of what people might do to him, of revealing too much of his real self, of loosening up and forgetting his self-imposed limits, of hoping for more.

There are three things I usually avoid: closeted characters, first pers
...more
Fangtasia
If there was a way to give more than 5 stars to a book, this would be the one I'd do it for. The author is brilliant. She manages to give us a full-body experience in this book. I felt all the sensations described, the feelings depicted, without ONCE resorting to the tried-and-true approach most other authors use, which is a lot of 'telling' with very little 'showing'. Just writing about it gives me goose bumps.

All the characters rang true, and great characters are what makes a memorable experi
...more
Alby Krebs
I just reread this book, and it still remains one of my favorites. This is such a well-written book, with realistic dialogue and wonderful characters, who experience real growth in the course of the novel. One thing I love is the relationship between the adults and the high school students, who are the actors in the high school version of Rent. The kids don't take over the story line, and the adults for the most part worry about them but keep their distance. It is nice to have the perspective of ...more
thelastaerie
A really angst-filled and realistic love story of small town homophobia. I especially liked the mystery element in the story, readers know there's more to the protagonist's past, but it's only revealed in devastating and full-force at the appropriate time. I would have given it 4.75 stars, if possible in this website :) My only minor complaint is that I thought the story might be more suited in third-person narration with single POV (it's first person narration in the book), but this doesn't rea ...more
Chris
Wow. This m/m romance gutted me, because it was such a powerful read. And yet... I can't tell you much about it, because part of its power and impact is in how the story develops and in how things are revealed. At the most simple level, it's the story of a deeply closeted high school teacher in conservative rural Texas, who very occasionally drives to Houston to hook up with someone - but never the same someone twice. It's a story of being afraid, of having extremely valid reasons to be afraid, ...more
Kaje Harper
A really well-paced story of Tom, high-school teacher damaged both physically and emotionally as a young man, finally reaching some healing. In Kevin, he finds someone who makes the climb back to living life and taking risks worthwhile. The writing was excellent and the characters complex and consistent. Definitely recommended.
Shirley Frances
Just wow! Great story, real, lovable characters, amazing dialog and my favorite, an emotional and deep narrative. I couldn't help but cry, laugh and sympathize with everything and everyone.
S.
I can't express adequately how this book has made me feel. Suffice it to say, huge thanks to the fabulous Karen for the recommendation as this was amazing.
Rebecca
Dear God. I really, really, really, really, really wanted to like this book, but it just annoyed and frustrated me to no end.

The concept is fantastic:

Tom Smith is a 38-year-old man who lives deep, deep in the closet, largely because he's a high school history teacher in a tiny (fictional) West Texas town. He lives his life terrified that his secret will be discovered and his life and job he loves will be destroyed. But, as a result, he's lonely, starved for companionship--and sex--the latter of
...more
Runell
Actual Rating: 4.5

Admit One had been sitting on my to-read shelf since the beginning of the year. Not as long as some other books that have been sitting, waiting patiently for me to read them, and to be quite honest, if it had not been picked for a particular challenge, it would have stayed on there for even longer. Not because I didn't want to read it because I really did, but I had this gut feeling that this book would be a hard one to read, more so than the synopsis implied. It would play wit
...more
Sylvie
Lovely, lovely story. I bought this book from Fictionwise ages ago, and I let it sit for a long while on my TBR pile because I had read that the story was more angsty than romance.

I finally was in the mindset to enjoy a realistic, heart-wrenching novel, and this book delivered for the most part. For the m/m genre, this one did not hold back on the realism - at least when it dealt with coming out, living in places of the world where being gay is equivalent to a death wish.

Sinclair did a phenome
...more
Oco
Excellent book. Smart, serious, but fun, too. The people were so well-drawn, from the protags through the minor characters, teenagers and 'villains'. Others have reviewed this well, so I won't try to repeat, but will mention a couple of things that stood out to me.

One, that Sinclair never took the obvious approach when drawing a character. To me, this is most clear in her portrayal of the teenagers, particularly Robbie. Robbie, though gay in a distinctly 'swishy' way, knows who he is, and though
...more
Tara
So I first read the blurb of this book a while back, probably almost a year ago. I passed it by because the blurb didn't catch me, which if you know me is weird. I work in theatre. It's what I do, I have tons of friends that have worked on Rent either on Broadway, on tours or regionally. I think the story of Jonathan Larson is a bittersweet story in and of itself. But I was like, "Rent? In High School? No thanks." I know I got caught up in professional snobbery. I admit it. I have put this book ...more
Kazza
The book is already well reviewed and the blurb spells it out clearly. This is my take on the book.

Closeted, gay teacher at a high school in a small West Texas town has been talked into the job of assistant to the director of the, HS adapted, musical Rent. Said teacher, Tom, is beyond paranoid that this will out him in some way to the people of Gunning. He truly believes that a neon sign will appear on his head saying 'I'm a faggot, beat me' so he tries awfully hard to convince George, fellow te
...more
Wendy Ann
Every once in a while, a book comes along that will stand the test of time and remain with you long after you close the final page. This was one of those books for me (and there haven’t been many) – memorable, unforgettable, 10+ stars, just WOW!

I couldn’t imagine a more realistic portrayal of a gay man’s journey through discovery, tragedy, pain, depression, survival, coping, fear, loneliness, need, desire, friendship, hope, fear again, despair, acceptance, love, and dreams. The author brought t
...more
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For years Jenna Hilary Sinclair approached creative writing as if she were looking over the edge of a cliff—the view was terrifying but seductive. She couldn’t comprehend how anyone could compose a complex plot and have the patience to put it on the page. But one day she sat down, picked up a pen, and much to her astonishment, a novel began to take shape.

Since that day, Jenna’s been in an exhilara
...more
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“The dykes versus the fags, but every straight man in the U.S who watched porn wanted to see two women getting off together. Lesbians held a unique place in the intolerant American psyche: it was the men who lay with men who challenged the words of the Holy Bible” 9 likes
“Kevin had been born to make love to a man, the same way I had.” 4 likes
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