To Train Up a Child

Apr 04, 2011 Synesthesia rated it 1 of 5 stars Recommends it for: No One!

Shelves: ew

Uh, no. This isn't a good book. It seems to forget that babies and children are in fact babies and children and they are not plotting against you.
When a baby bites its mother's breasts, it's not doing it out of malice, so why pull their hair? Why not stop the kid from nursing and then start again? Why is it necessary to inflict pain on a child that small?
This book advices switching starting at the age of four months. Why?
You mean to tell me that rather than taking your guns and putting them in...more

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Aug 17, 2012 Misfit marked it as will-never-read · review of another edition Recommends it for: No one!

I can't believe that a book that encourages child abuse is allowed on the market and has been tied to one couple accused of killing their two adopted children by the *parenting* methods in this book.

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May 19, 2012 Ellen rated it 1 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This book is truly monstrous.

I have seen positive reviews that cite the fact that Pearl promotes relationship-building, and point to that as a counterbalance to the spanking. People who love the book seem to want us to believe that, because so much of the book is about kindness, that it somehow "cancels out" the "small" amount of violence.

But I find that one of the most terrifying things about it.

The juxtaposition of "loving" content, religious content, Pearl's bizarrely jolly tone, and the pass...more

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Jun 22, 2012 Ellen rated it 1 of 5 stars

This book is truly monstrous.

I have seen positive reviews that cite the fact that Pearl promotes relationship-building, and point to that as a counterbalance to the spanking. People who love the book seem to want us to believe that, because so much of the book is about kindness, that it somehow "cancels out" the "small" amount of violence.

But I find that one of the most terrifying things about it.

The juxtaposition of "loving" content, religious content, Pearl's bizarrely jolly tone, and the pas...more

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Nov 08, 2011 Kristen marked it as are-you-shitting-me

Shelves: bizarre, trash

Yet another 'good Christan' beat their child to death at the instruction of Mr. Pearl.
I'd like to think Jesus would be against beating your six month old baby with a whip, but hey, what do I know?

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/07/us/...

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I think after reviewing When Children Invite Child Abuse: A Search for Answers When Love Is Note my love for books about beating children is fairly well known, so imagine...more

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Oct 17, 2007 Elizabeth rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: parents

Shelves: parenting, faith

I like the theory behind the book but some of it is kinda over the top for me.
Finally finished this one too and wow-
Some stuff was really crazy: switching a five month old, homeschooling being the only option, boys formal education should be over by 12, 'helping' a kid into a tank so they can learn to respect water....
But some was really good: your hand should be an instrument of love, don't discipline out of frustration but do it calmly, the one who disciplines should also be the one to comfor...more

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May 29, 2007 Adrienne rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Any parent

This is a great book for learning to be proactive instead of reactive in child training. Teach them when they are young..if you wait it will be harder on you and your child.

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Jul 10, 2007 Kim rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: parents of small children

another one I should read again... my kids keep changing!

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Oct 29, 2007 Beth rated it 1 of 5 stars Recommends it for: NO ONE!

This is one of the most horrific, abusive books I have EVER read. This is a how-too book on child abuse. Impressionable Christian parents are most vulnerable. This book is disgusting and dangerous to our children and puts their wellbeing and lives in danger. Educating yourself on the true meaning of the Bible's rod verses and God's grace will show you that this book is not ok with God's plan. In fact the church that the Pearls were associated with have since taken a stand against this book and d...more

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Feb 05, 2012 Dayna marked it as books-i-need-to-finish

I remember flipping through this as a kid, when my mom had it on her bookshelf, and thinking that it was ridiculous. Yes, I read these sorts of things and had opinions on it as a kid. I was the opinionated type, and when my parents figured out how to communicate with me I think they were proud of that fact. I don't think this is a book that either of my parents took to heart though, because none of the so-called abuse cited in recent controversy (arising from very real and very tragic cases of a...more

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Apr 28, 2013 Tamara rated it 1 of 5 stars

To Train Up a Child is an extremely poor book for parenting advise. This is ABUSE, not parenting. I've never hit my kids and know plenty of others that don't as well and they're respectful, creative, amazing, fun, intelligent, kind, and caring individuals. You don't have to hit your children to earn their trust and respect. In fact, you're only earning fear. You don't need to create a mindless, submissive fearful zombie follower in order to have a "happy" family. Hitting a child at all, especial...more

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Apr 10, 2013 Adam rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: my-reviews, my-recommended-reads

A few years ago my wife read the book, "Created to be his help meet" By Debi Pearl. I later heard of this book, and saw much controversy surrounding it. References in the news of psycho child beaters seriously hurting their children, and incidentally owning this book. I didn't think it was like the Pearls to teach something like that, so I thought I would take a look at the book for myself. To my surprise in and out of the book, Michael warns against hitting out of anger, leaving marks, and bein...more

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Sep 08, 2012 Morgan-Britney Morgan-Britney rated it 1 of 5 stars

I hate to give this book even one star.

I remember reading it at a friend's house when I was a girl, and being appalled. Spanking a seven month old because he's being...manipulative? I was very upset.

When I came back to this book many years later, I nearly ripped it up and burned it. I was shocked that someone can condone the beating of children with plumbing pipes and tree branches. The book suggests you let your children burn themselves so they will stay away from fire, tease them with things t...more

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Jul 28, 2012 Jennifer Brukiewa rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: family-parenting-marriage

I don't doubt the Pearls love their kids. And I am sure they have raised delightful children. There were glimpses of grace I saw in this book. They stress relating to your child and spending quality time with them. They emphasize earning their respect by keeping control of your emotions, never acting out of anger, and nurturing loving connection. They also give the wonderful advice of training ahead of time how a child should behave rather than doing damage control.
However,this wisdom can be b...more I don't doubt the Pearls love their kids. And I am sure they have raised delightful children. There were glimpses of grace I saw in this book. They stress relating to your child and spending quality time with them. They emphasize earning their respect by keeping control of your emotions, never acting out of anger, and nurturing loving connection. They also give the wonderful advice of training ahead of time how a child should behave rather than doing damage control.
However,this wisdom can be better gleaned from other books in my opinion. I recommend Heartfelt Discipline by Clay Clarkson or Grace Based Parenting. These get deeper into the heart of a child and beyond behavior and outward obedience to grace, love and handling freedom well. This is important as the gospel and our relationship with Christ, in Christ, is based on such things and is no longer based on sin and punishment. I don't want my kids to view me or any other person as the final authority. I want them to learn to follow the Shepherd. And He parents differently than I often do.

That said, I would not recommend this book to anyone. It can be fuel for abusive treatment of children in the name of raising godly, obedient kids.

The goal of parenting in this book is obedience. Period. First time. The methods can be abusive especially if the temperment of your child is more strong willed (so often misunderstood as defiant). The message of the book is [not a direct quote] "Trust me as you would God and obey without question right now." all communicated with a smile and varying degrees of physical pain. The main problem I have with this is that we are not God. Many parents are not acting from a place of love and grace but from fear. For those who just want compliance, this is a great book to justify their abuse.

The methods of this book can be heart and character crushing, producing kids that have no mind of there own and are ruled by avoiding pain and punishment (fear). They can become dependant on outward guidence rather than discerning truth for themselves from the Word, Spirit and the world. Our kids need to be learning to be guided by the Holy Spirit within them. Also the views on marriage and the role of women is extremely patriarichal and can be harmful.

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Jul 12, 2012 Eustacia Tan rated it 1 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This is a two book review of To Train Up A Child and a counter-argument Parenting in the Name of God

I haven't done a two-book review for so long! But anyway, a few days ago, I was reading Cracked (it's really funny if you stick to the history/others content. Otherwise, it can get very vulgar) and came across a "worst parenting" article. One of the methods/book - To Train Up A Child caught my eye, and I promptly spent whatever free I time I had in the next few days researching it. So, I found two...more This is a two book review of To Train Up A Child and a counter-argument Parenting in the Name of God

I haven't done a two-book review for so long! But anyway, a few days ago, I was reading Cracked (it's really funny if you stick to the history/others content. Otherwise, it can get very vulgar) and came across a "worst parenting" article. One of the methods/book - To Train Up A Child caught my eye, and I promptly spent whatever free I time I had in the next few days researching it. So, I found two books: the actual text itself (one of the earlier editions) and the counter-argument (Parenting in the Name of God), which is also available free.

To introduce this book, To Train Up A Child is a parenting book that advocates "switching" (whipping/spanking) as a method of training children. At least two children have died and their deaths are suspected to be linked to to this parenting method.

And the author responded to criticisms by telling us how he and his family is "laughing" at the 'ridiculous' accusations. But really, that is a very insensitive thing to say, considering that children have died. (And personally, I wonder if the fact that his grandchildren laugh all the time is because they're going to have a nervous breakdown or if they're afraid that they'll get "switched" if they do not put on a happy face.)

So, let's start with the book I read first: Parenting in the Name of God by David J. Dyck and C.L Dyck. I know it's kind of strange to read the counter-argument first but well, I already had a bad first impression anyway.

But really, I thought this free ebook was very well-written. At the very beginning, the authors tell you their background (so you know where they're coming from), and each chapter has a definition list so you know exactly what you're talking about. The book is also very calm and reasoned, and actually gave me a new perspective to the whole issue. By showing how the theology behind this book is un-Godly, it becomes easier to explain to others why this is not a Christian style of parenting. I definitely recommend reading this book.

And of course, it's quite self-defeating to list your stands against a viewpoint only to have to admit you've never read the actual text. So thankfully, I found a legal and free copy of an early version of the book online.

Frankly, I was disturbed reading this book. While I agree with some parts, like sticking to the limits you set, the whole "train your child like a dog" thing was disturbing. And even if I didn't read Parenting in the Name of God first, I would still have major doubts about their theology, considering how they seem to encourage their parents to act like God. No, the job of a parent is to teach their child about God, not be a god to their children until they reach their 'age of accountability'. Plus, it's just cruel to set up situations (like letting your child play with a toy and then call him for no reason) just so you can whip your child into a certain mode.

As for me, I grew up in a fairly strict household. I've definitely been caned before, but it wasn't very often. So from personal experience, I can say that this method is not the only (if it even works) method to raise happy and stable children. My parents have never needed to train me through caning (they used it only for extreme cases, such as playing during prayer and such). And I'm pretty sure I'm not the self-indulgent child that the Pearl's claim will develop without their training method (I may be a brat, but I do know my limits). My parents have managed (and here's the shocker) to teach me right from wrong without constantly caning/switching me. So yeah, while there are occasions where you should use "the rod", it should not be part of a training plan.

But really, the biggest issue is the very unChristian theology they have rather than the methods they advocate. It promotes a very ego-stroking view for the parents and demeans the child. I wonder, if without this training, children would grow up to be self-indulgent, than shouldn't the parents who read this for the first time (and decide to use it), also be self-indulgent? In that case, why should they be allowed to "train" their child?

First published at Inside the mind of a Bibliophile (less)

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Jun 13, 2012 Steve Hemmeke rated it 2 of 5 stars

To Train Up a Child, by Michael and Debi Pearl

I’ve finally gotten around to reading something by the Pearls who have quite a following in the homeschool movement as I’ve been given to understand. Overall this book is a mix of some really good counsel and some poor assumptions.

The first three chapters are heavy on training and consistency. They emphasize proactive training before discipline. Sinful anger in parents while disciplining poorly causes angry children. Really good stuff.

But bad assumpt...more To Train Up a Child, by Michael and Debi Pearl

I’ve finally gotten around to reading something by the Pearls who have quite a following in the homeschool movement as I’ve been given to understand. Overall this book is a mix of some really good counsel and some poor assumptions.

The first three chapters are heavy on training and consistency. They emphasize proactive training before discipline. Sinful anger in parents while disciplining poorly causes angry children. Really good stuff.

But bad assumptions lurk. Most foundationally, there is a messed up view of accountability in children. “The child is not a morally viable soul.” The idea being that you condition them behaviorally until they can make moral judgments. This is not helpful. We can and should talk about moral choices with our young children, to help them learn from an early age why certain actions are wrong. Their over-reliance on behavioral conditioning seems to come from other bad assumptions: that young kids are no different than animals in the training needed; that the technique of training, the outward method, will guarantee a good result; that correct and consistent discipline does not prevent all sin.

The Pearls wax eloquent about the power of the rod to restore and comfort, and overdo the positive effect of a spanking. (I write this having seen firsthand the positive effect of a spanking.) In reality spankings often are ineffective, because some other part of the correction and restoration process is gummed up, or because it is not fitting for the situation or the child’s makeup. But Pearl actually calls the rod a “magic wand” at one point. They counsel parents to constrain (physically) and discipline the child until they surrender with anecdotes of up to 10 spankings of 10 switches each. There are usually better ways to not let the child “win” a battle of wills than these prolonged sessions. This counsel assumes that external, physical force is going to correct the child on the inside, or that external conformity now is better than dealing with the heart. Bad assumptions. Ironically, given the Pearls’ anti-modern outlook, their child-rearing outlook is the modern, technique-based, approach. Five steps to your best life now, and only 3 steps to a perfectly behaved child. It just is not that simple. If you think it is, and you have well-trained children, I would re-consider if you have children with trained hearts, or just trained behavior. Good training can lead into good heart shepherding, but they should not be seen as the same thing. There is a lot of potential pride in being a good disciplinarian reflected in the anecdotes: “I just do this, and my kids snap to it.”

Mixed in with these problems, they offer excellent (inconsistent!) counsel, too. Here’s a sample.
Outward correction doesn’t help if there isn’t mutual respect between parent and child. A child’s repentance needs to register with and be respected by the parent, or it drives the child away. “If you will cultivate fellowship with your child, you will have such cooperation and compliance that you will forget where you last left the rod” (34). Your child comes to see God as they see their parents, whether permissive or severe or balanced. Reproof is not ranting. Parents need to use the rod and reproof, both (Proverbs 29:15). If a parent doesn’t respect his own rules and enforce them with the kids, the kid gets a negative view of law and of God as permissive. Don’t let a child obey one parent but not another; be on the same page in discipline. The chapter on training children to work and do household chores was very good. “If it isn’t fun for all, it isn’t fun;” when one sibling is offending another, point out to the offender that the offended wasn’t having fun. Training them to see the sin for what it is. Great stuff.

Conclusion
This is a book of extremes. The good stuff is really good. Discipline out of anger is not discipline. The bad stuff is really bad. “If you have to sit on him to spank him, do not hesitate.” Because of this it’s hard to give a 1-5 star rating. I would NOT recommend looking here for your primary guidance in parenting. But I was helped by it at points, by way of reminder.

My difference is partly one of emphasis. They say, “You have secret weapons: a plan, love, patience, reproof, THE ROD OF CORRECTION, endurance, and, the hope of reward promised in the Scriptures.” (Emphasis added by the author). I’d write it, “You have secret weapons: A PLAN, LOVE, PATIENCE, REPROOF, the rod of correction, endurance, and, the hope of reward promised in the Scriptures.” So this is partly an emphasis difference. Will complete consistency produce complete obedience? No, and they finally admit it in just a sentence or two, after several chapters of implying that it will, that weeds of sin do continue.

But my biggest critique is that forgiveness and grace are totally left out of the picture. Only about one-fourth of one page in the whole book addresses grace or forgiveness, and the gist is that “Strict enforcement gives the opportunity for demonstrating grace.” But how is this so? In the middle of a great description of the Gospel, he says that children can’t understand Jesus dying for them, but they can understand the rod. This is atrocious! The rod is not given to purge guilt, as is implied, but to teach the awfulness of the sin. Regardless of the few qualifications offered, and the otherwise good counsel, the assumptions of the book are functionally Pelagian: If you work hard enough at being a consistently disciplining parent, then your children will behave, give you no grief, and turn out well. There is no foundation of the grace of Jesus Christ here. In a chaotic and licentious age, it is easy to train moral behavior and define ourselves against the immoral world. But our higher calling is to draw our children to walk in the righteousness and grace of Jesus.(less)

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Dec 01, 2011 Rachel rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: hall-of-shame

Will write a complete review later.

Ok. If this review isn't in my typically balanced and calm style, there's a reason. I hate this book. I hate what the authors stand for and how it has destroyed lives. I hate the mindset that demands parents "break a child's will".

I don't have a copy of this book, so I'm not going to be able to give you a page number. Many other reviewers do offer in-depth critiques of the book complete with quotes and page numbers.

The Pearls believe that children are inherentl...more

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Nov 21, 2011 Lucy Mcwhirter added it · review of another edition

So much has already been said about this book and I can only add that it is not that well written. The sentences look like they were written by a child. The book has many detailed stories of 'spanking' that were administered by the Pearls and others. They also describe times when children have misbehaved and how foolish the parents looked. It is clear that they want to instill hatred for children by the parents. They claim that all children who have been reared by their training methods are happ...more

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Nov 13, 2011 Lucy Mcwhirter rated it 1 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: child-abuse

So much has already been said about this book and I can only add that it is not that well written. The sentences look like they were written by a child. The book has many detailed stories of 'spanking' that were administered by the Pearls and others. They also describe times when children have misbehaved and how foolish the parents looked. It is clear that they want to instill hatred for children by the parents. They claim that all children who have been reared by their training methods are happ...more

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Oct 16, 2011 Erin Wilson rated it 1 of 5 stars

Would never, EVER recommend this book. Not only is it the epitome of lazy parenting, it's dangerous. Three adopted children have died from this, and I don't doubt that many more children, adopted or otherwise, have developed phobias and various other anxiety problems. The result of these teachings are joyless, broken children, not children with any sort of enthusiasm for the Lord or life at all. Children, selfish as they may be, are simply looking to satisfy their down desires, not test or manip...more Would never, EVER recommend this book. Not only is it the epitome of lazy parenting, it's dangerous. Three adopted children have died from this, and I don't doubt that many more children, adopted or otherwise, have developed phobias and various other anxiety problems. The result of these teachings are joyless, broken children, not children with any sort of enthusiasm for the Lord or life at all. Children, selfish as they may be, are simply looking to satisfy their down desires, not test or manipulate the parent. Children are not animals to be "trained"- and indeed, if anyone trained their animals that way it would be illegal and considered abusive. I truly hope that creating robots was not the intention of Mike and Debi Pearl, and especially not the intention of anyone who actually follows their potentially lethal advice.

Mike Pearl also makes several errors in LOGIC in this book. He claims that game wardens will allow fishers to catch only 5 fish, but penalize them if they catch 6, and many parents make this error of allowing "chances" before actually using appropriate punishment. Um, no, 5 is the maximum amount of fish someone can catch, and if they take 6 they are taking more than their fair share. This is not at all related to children being allowed to break rules before the parents step in. There is nothing inherently illegal in catching fish, but there is in catching more than the allowed amount. Wouldn't that be more like a child being allowed 5 pieces of candy, but not 6? Come on. There are more errors in logic, but that's the one that stood out.

What's more about this horrible book is that the theology is dodgy and the Scriptural backup very shaky. The Pearls follow a VERY literal interpretation of the Bible, and fail to comprehend that there may be more meaning. On top of that, they throw around typical Christian buzzwords, but actually seldom use Scripture while claiming that all of their teachings are Biblically sound. They are not sound at all, and they mostly use logical fallacies and appeal to emotions to reach readers. I dare say God would not approve.(less)

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Oct 02, 2011 Anne Moser rated it 1 of 5 stars

This book has been cited as being instrumental in the deaths of at least three children:

Sean Paddock - suffocated

Lydia Schatz - beaten

Hana Williams - starvation and hypothermia

I'm a survivor of Pearl-type teachings. Their formulas do NOT create "emotionally stable" children, as the Pearls claim. Instead, they create robots. They talk about creating "bonds" with your children, while at the same time advocating breaking your children. Here are some direct quotes from this book:

"...if you are just...more

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Aug 15, 2011 Mitch Graves rated it 5 of 5 stars

The problem with this review star system is that we don't get to see the children of those who give it a terrible rating. BUT if you read through them you will see some subtle admissions such as "I admit my children are not the best behaved" Um...Say what? Why not? Mine are invariable the best behaved in pretty much every situation. Mine were so well behaved that my very big name attorney brother and my family court judge sister BOTH asked us for parenting advice. So I'll be the 1st to SHOW the...more The problem with this review star system is that we don't get to see the children of those who give it a terrible rating. BUT if you read through them you will see some subtle admissions such as "I admit my children are not the best behaved" Um...Say what? Why not? Mine are invariable the best behaved in pretty much every situation. Mine were so well behaved that my very big name attorney brother and my family court judge sister BOTH asked us for parenting advice. So I'll be the 1st to SHOW the kind of kids you get when you do it right www.gravesjusdo.com. What you don't see is they are all "straight A" or nearly "straight A" students (not that this is more important than character by a long shot). They all get along so well that we have been approached by total strangers more times than we can count asking how we did it. We average a call a day from the two at the OTC. My 18 yr old son who started college at 15 still spontaneously hugs me w/o any reason. How many fathers can say that? They all share everything with us. They are exceedingly happy motivated kids with extraordinarily high levels of emotional intelligence. We have had total strangers come into our home to purchase computer parts and ask if they could just stay a while...I asked why and one man said, "I have never been in a home that I felt this much peace and joy". I could, and have been asked to write a book, but this is just a taste. I am CERTAIN that many of you could share stories and incidents as well.
The naysayers here are people who have silly leftist agendas and have NOT TRIED IT THE RIGHT WAY.
I'd bet my last dime that the majority of them are also quite anti-Christian or "liberal Christian".
They have opinions- we have experiences. Some of them go around the web posting to every sight they can find. It is the summer of 2011 and the streets in England and many US cities are filled with then kind of kids their bright ideas have created. They are burning cars, looting stores, and demanding the gov't be their mother forever. If you love your children you will make certain they are never part of this group. Good GODly character is the only way.

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Jul 23, 2012 Jamie rated it 1 of 5 stars

Giving this one star and calling it "read" is extremely unfair, but (at least the first chapter of) this book is the most bizarre parenting book I've ever read. I began to question its relevance when I read the second sentence: "I have had children in my house who were enough to give an electric wheat grinder a nervous breakdown." Um, okay. But I kept reading and enjoyed the recommendation that a "switch" be a "twelve-inch long, one-eighth-inch diameter sprig from a willow tree." Is this for rea...more

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Jan 06, 2013 Raine Carraway rated it 1 of 5 stars

This book is like the proverbial glass of water with a few drops of sewage (or strychnine) in it.

I had read another book by Debi Pearl that gave me some useful advice for my marriage, and this one came highly recommended by some friends, so I thought I'd give it a try when I found out I was pregnant. The parts about spending time with your children, "tying heart strings", etc are good.

The bad is in the overall philosophy, where they teach that children as young as a few months are stubborn, will...more

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Jun 28, 2011 Jennifer rated it 1 of 5 stars

I would have given this 0 stars if that was an option. I picked up this monstrosity of a book this morning and gave it a quick read over. This book has been mentioned to me by clients in the past, all of whom had given up the system and could not figure out why it didn't work when they used it faithfully. I will be the first to admit that my children are not the best behaved, but I would never abuse them in the manner advocated by this book. There is not good psychology behind the methods in thi...more

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Mar 30, 2010 Shannon rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2010, christian-life, non-fiction

I picked up this book to read after a friend drew my attention to a child's death. Adoptive parents had disciplined a child repeatedly. A day or two after the discipline, she stopped breathing and they called 911. She was pronounced dead after arriving at the hospital. Newspeople and others have been trying to incriminate the Pearls in the case because "To Train Up a Child" was found in the parents' posession. I wanted to see what their book on childtraining truly said. As I expected, people com...more

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Jan 08, 2009 Sue rated it 1 of 5 stars

This book is dangerous.

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Mar 16, 2013 Kelley rated it 1 of 5 stars

Lacks the Gospel - trains children to obey created and arbitrary laws of parents - or else be 'switched' in to compliance. This sets up a horror for children. And I think will ultimately lead to most children to one day think of God as an arbitrarily cruel taskmaster.
I've seen far too many Christian parents head down this road of training - and watched their children become obediently outwardly compliant with smiles- after all, who wants to get beaten in to submission? - and these same supposed...more

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Dec 19, 2007 Amanda rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Parents

When one first reads this book it is a little intense. To put it into practice takes a lot of time and a lot of patience. But, boy, does it pay off!! My husband and I recommend this book to any new parent.

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May 19, 2012 Jennifer rated it 1 of 5 stars

I found myself wanting throw this book in the trash more times than I ever have when reading a book. However, I forced the bile down and suffered through just so I couldn't be accused of judging a book I hadn't read. I am horrified that the author and his wife haven't been accused and prosecuted for abuse. Needless to say, this book was promptly burned and none of its principles we're applied in my parenting. My children are human beings, not animals and as such, they are treated as I would want...more

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