Tweak: Growing Up On Methamphetamines

by Nic Sheff

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1,799 ratings, 3.64 average rating, 588 reviews (more data...)

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published

February 19th 2007 by Ginee Seo Books

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Hardcover, 336 pages

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1416913629 (isbn13: 9781416913627)

description

Nic Sheff was drunk for the first time at age eleven. In the years that followed, he would regularly smoke pot, do cocaine and Ecstasy, and develop ad...more

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06/11/08

Kim rated it:

Read in June, 2008

This was an okay book - it dragged a lot through the middle; and try as I might, I just couldn't get behind Nic. He was selfish, disgusting, pathetic, and just plain annoying. I know that sounds incredibly insensitive and harsh, but I'm just being honest. Perhaps it is because I'm not an addict and I'm pretty common sense and responsible? He also touts himself as this great writer, but really, it was just an okay book; not this astounding piece of literature. This would be a good read for t...more

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06/26/08

Jenn Dawn rated it:

bookshelves: non-fiction

Has a copy to sell/swap — Read in July, 2008

recommends it for: Readers of Beautiful Boy

I heard about Tweak/Beautiful Boy through the provocative NY Times book review a few months ago. The idea of having such a harrowing story told from two opposite perspectives really piqued my interest.

Tweak is nothing if not engaging. That being said, I find the writing to be sub-par, at best. After listening to a Nic Sheff podcast, I learned that Nic writes exactly how he speaks. Filled with "like, you know"'s, I found myself frequently wondering if this was the caliber...more

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04/24/08

Marianne rated it:

Read in April, 2008

I tried reading this book after reading Beautiful Boy and I couldn't get through it. This guy's writing was published in Newsweek? Once you get beyond the extremely graphic quality of it, I thought it was terrible. He touts himself as an accomplished writer for his age, yet he uses "amazing" to describe things at least 3 times in the first 50 pages. Come on.

However, it was interesting to read the opposite side of this story after reading Beautiful Boy. Nick is more hon...more

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05/12/08

Jennifer Wardrip rated it:

bookshelves: trt-reviews

Reviewed by coollibrarianchick for TeensReadToo.com

Methamphetamine use, commonly known on the street as crystal, tweak, the New Prozac, and crank, has become a growing problem in the U.S. in the last several years. From what I have read, there is no worse drug addiction than crystal meth. It not only affects the person using but the personal relationships they have, as well. It is not just my humble opinion when I tell you that these drugs have the power to kill or cause great harm. ...more Reviewed by coollibrarianchick for TeensReadToo.com

Methamphetamine use, commonly known on the street as crystal, tweak, the New Prozac, and crank, has become a growing problem in the U.S. in the last several years. From what I have read, there is no worse drug addiction than crystal meth. It not only affects the person using but the personal relationships they have, as well. It is not just my humble opinion when I tell you that these drugs have the power to kill or cause great harm. A great example would be Nic Sheff, the author of TWEAK. At an early age, just a babe himself, Nick had his first taste of drugs and alcohol. Drug use escalated in Nic's case - he went from just smoking pot to abusing cocaine, heroin, and crystal meth. For over a decade, on and off, Nic used drugs. The book opens up with a bang - Nic relapsing after 18 months of being clean and sober.

You can call TWEAK a young adult book if you like, since Nic is a young adult, just in his twenties, but in actuality it is a book that will appeal to any age level, young and old alike. Teens will definitely gravitate to Nic's story because of the fact that it is someone about their age using drugs, and they can relate to it (maybe not completely but on some level). The general public may find it of interest, because it will give them an insight into the mind of an addict. Perhaps a reader may find comfort in this story, knowing that he is not alone.

It occurred to me as I was reading TWEAK that the book was like a cleanser for Nic; a way to cleanse his soul. Writing TWEAK couldn't have been easy for him, as Nic had to relive everything he did and put it down on paper. Some of what I read admittedly shocked me. I can't imagine what goes inside an addict's mind. The book was so honest; at times I ached for him. Other times I wanted to strangle him for what he was doing to himself and his family. I hate to say that I didn't think his clean and sober status was going to last very long. It was as if it was too good to be true. At the end of the book, we learn that Nic is now clean and dealing with his demons on an everyday basis. I expect that this is not going to be an easy road for him or for his family.

Everybody participates in addictive behavior in some way or another. Some people believe that people get involved in addictive behaviors because they are reckless, self-absorbed, and have no self-control. For the most part, I stand in the camp that believes that drug and alcohol addictions are diseases. You may choose to get treatment, but once an addict always an addict. Nic is never going to escape the addict label even if he does remain clean the rest of his life.

Nic's father, David Sheff, also has written a book about meth addiction. BEAUTIFUL BOY looks at Nic's addiction through the eyes of a parent. Mary Pipher, a psychologist and the renowned author of the book REVIVING OPHELIA, says on the jacket of David Sheff's book: "When one of us tells the truth, he makes it easier for all of us to open our hearts to our pain and that of others." Good reason to read Nic's book and his father's. Pick up your copies today. (less)

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04/09/08

Jeremy rated it:

bookshelves: people-biography

Read in April, 2008

recommended to Jeremy by: Dennis Miller
recommends it for: All

This is the memoir by Nic Sheff that accompanies his father, David's, memoir. The book is an extremely honest look at addiction written by an addict, Nic Sheff.
This book is heavy emotionally. Everything from details on cooking meth to abcsessed arms the size of baseballs are included. Along the way Nic prostitutes himself, steals from strangers, and in a heart-breaking scene, takes $5 from his little brother's piggy bank.
Nic holds nothing back, and what is left on the page is somethi...more

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05/29/08

Carol rated it:

bookshelves: never-finished

Not gonna finish this one, either.

Just about every drug addict I know (and I know quite a few because I work at a homeless shelter) thinks s/he has a great story to tell - sorry to say, bud, they're pretty much all the same story.

Boring, self-absorbed. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the majority of drug addicts in my opinion. The book, too.

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04/01/08

Beth rated it:

bookshelves: memoirs-bios

Read in May, 2008

I'm not sure what to make of this book. It felt like at times it was trying too hard (to sound cool, to be edgy, to be desparate), and at times it was not trying hard enough (Sheff alludes to his "troubled past" that is supposed to be even more messed up than his present relapses, yet never gives any real details to back it up). Ultimately, the book ends up reading like a cliche that we've read and seen and heard too many times to make it fresh anymore. And although the book is "t...more

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04/12/08

Michelle rated it:

Read in May, 2008

I'm currently reading this book and I'm not sure I'm going to finish it. I have a hard time feeling any sensitivity toward the author who is a basic train wreck. It's so incredibly obvious (after reading Beautiful Boy) that his many problems start out with his parent's divorce, his dad having an affair and his mother abandoning him to move far away. How hard could it be to figure out the kid was going to end up on drugs? I think there has to be a point when someone has to take responsibility...more

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08/24/08

Shana rated it:

Read in August, 2008

I truly enjoyed this book. I just finished it and I am excited to write this review. I had just finished Beautiful Boy, which is written by this author's father regarding and is about his son's (the author of Tweak, Nic's) battle with drug addiction prior to picking up Tweak. Both books were compelling and it was amazing to read about the same story from the son's perspective after reading about the experience from his father's perspective - a rare experience. Having read his father's book first...more

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06/15/08

Deb rated it:

Read in June, 2008

recommends it for: parents of teens and teens who think they are too cool to listen to warnings about drugs

Here is the story of David Sheff's Beautiful Boy from the son’s perspective. He is not the writer that his father is, but hearing his voice, so clearly the voice of a damaged soul, and also possibly a narcissist, fills out the picture. In its own way, this book was hard to put down, despite its shortcomings. (Poor editing?) I gained a great deal of insight into the devastation of addiction. And I find that helpful in many ways. Despite all the damage he wrought and his desperate struggles to g...more

Like this review? yes (2 people liked it)

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04/21/09

Anastacia rated it:

I wish to God that Goodreads had a category or designation for THE WORST BOOK I HAVE EVER READ, because this would definitely be in it. The schtick is a pretty good one - the drug addicted son writing his version and his father writing his own version, but the execution is just awful. The kid, Nic, is just one more wealthy kid (who brand-name and name drops EXCESSIVELY) who goes down a wrong path and has a family to keep picking up the pieces for him, giving him chance after chance. It angers...more

Like this review? yes (2 people liked it)

10 comments

04/22/09

Jenny rated it:

Read in April, 2009

I definitely prefer the father's book over the son's, not to say that the son's memoir isn't powerful, it just isn't enjoyable to read. First, it clearly reveals the seedy, dangerous and horrific underbelly of drug abuse and addiction in American cities.

It's hard to say if it is by design, but you begin the book expecting to feel sympathy for Nic and his drug addiction, but as you ride the roller coaster of addiction, sobriety, and relaspe with him, you begin to feel the frustration...more

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04/21/09

M o I rated it:

(review of isbn 1416972196)

bookshelves: read-in-2009

The Twit-like update box is not enough to contain my ennui and annoyance at this point(p 259). OH MY GOD. You can just tell when Zelda enters his life again everything is about to totally fall apart, and lo, it does. Story of an addict's life. But, just as the writing about drugs is sort of totally emotionless, this has a real I-was-at-a-movie-and-it-went-like-this quality now -- it's told _about,_ but the people are really hard to get a handle on, or even to see, and therefore to care about...more The Twit-like update box is not enough to contain my ennui and annoyance at this point(p 259). OH MY GOD. You can just tell when Zelda enters his life again everything is about to totally fall apart, and lo, it does. Story of an addict's life. But, just as the writing about drugs is sort of totally emotionless, this has a real I-was-at-a-movie-and-it-went-like-this quality now -- it's told _about,_ but the people are really hard to get a handle on, or even to see, and therefore to care about. The detail of the starfucker who immediately plugged the names of speakers at Hollywood meetings into imdb.com to see whether or not they were big shots was amusing, tho....but it's more like a Hollwood-novel detail. "When the shots are strong enough you get this feeling like your head is just pounding with energy. Your ears ring and you almost pass out and it is just amazing." Dude. What the hell kind of druggie description is that? I get that kind of feeling when I drink too many lattes in a row. If I'm going to get dragged along through someone's drunkalog I at least want some moments of good dirty nostalgia as the price of the trip.

ETA: Best bit of the book so far, sadly on page 288: "I don't sleep for four days and nights and the fucking bugs won't leave me alone....I go into the counselors' office and demand to be taken to a hospital. A silver-haired Austrian woman with shimmering blue eyes suggests, 'Why don't you just lie down and invite the bugs in? Experience the bugs crawling on you. Become one with the bugs.'

"I tell her what I think of that idea."

I really have to wonder how this guy writes -- some other reviews mentioned hearing him speak on NPR et al, and apparently he sounds just like his writing style. It really almost reads like a transcript of someone speaking, every 'uh' and 'like' intact.

FINAL THOUGHTS: I think this is the first book I've seen to have not only an afterword to the paperback edition, but also the first post of his blog, which I guess his publisher encouraged him to set up? because the story's so obviously not over. But he recently abandoned it, so. http://nicsheff.blogspot.com/(less)

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02/17/09

Mike rated it:

Read in February, 2009

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

Tweak is a tragic tale of a guy trapped in his own spiraling demise. The reason for his down hill slide is him and only him. He blames the many worldly problems, his life problems, his relationship problems, but in spite of him finding God and working for a better life, he goes back to the old habits. I think more than twice he quits and relapses but I don't remember specifically. This book is best if you want to read and understand how the human mind can lie to you and take you to a place you t...more

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03/05/08

Andria rated it:

bookshelves: read-2008

Read in February, 2008

A book in need of an editor. But maybe that is the definition of an out of control life of a teenage/young twenty drug addict, a life in need of an editor.

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12/28/08

Sarahbeth rated it:

Read in December, 2008

I read this book very quickly. I read the father's book, "A Beautiful Boy" first. Both give insight into the devestating world of addiction. I felt a lot of emotions reading both books and was very tearful at times with the dad's book because I think I could relate to him. As a parent you just want you children to be happy and whole and to watch him 'lose' his son to drug addiction is heart-breaking. I won't go into my own personal experiences with those I love and their addiction...more

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09/16/08

Julie rated it:

bookshelves: biography-or-memoir, young-adult

Read in October, 2008

Tweak is a tale of addiction describing the experiences of Nic Sheff, who was for many years addicted to various drugs (meth and heroin to begin with, later coke and various prescription medications). This book was actually written in response to a book by David Sheff called Beautiful Boy, about the experience of dealing with his son's addiction(s) and their consequences for his family.

The first third of Tweak is a demonstration of the kind of depraved lifestyle Nic's addiction leads...more Tweak is a tale of addiction describing the experiences of Nic Sheff, who was for many years addicted to various drugs (meth and heroin to begin with, later coke and various prescription medications). This book was actually written in response to a book by David Sheff called Beautiful Boy, about the experience of dealing with his son's addiction(s) and their consequences for his family.

The first third of Tweak is a demonstration of the kind of depraved lifestyle Nic's addiction leads to—a study of how quickly an addict can move down the downward spiral to the point where he or she will do absolutely anything for drugs, or money for drugs. Stealing (even from family members), prostitution, selling more drugs... nothing is out of the question.

In this book, Nic repeatedly addresses the question of how far a person can sink before they realize they need to climb out of the hole. Sheff enters rehab multiple times, but for various reasons relapses into heavy drug use despite a few near-death occurrences and an absolutely unsustainable lifestyle.

Each time he tries to climb back to reality, Sheff reaches out to his family and close friends, but not surprisingly, after several times of hearing the same song the relationships become more and more tenuous and even family members stop believing that he will remain sober.

I have to say: at the beginning of the book, I was expecting to get more insight into Sheff's behavior and to gain an understanding of (and therefore sympathy for) his choices and lifestyle. This didn't happen. First off, I was truly shocked at just how depraved and desperate his lifestyle became each time he descended into the depths of heavy usage. Friendships and family ties meant nothing, except as a means of gaining money to fuel the drug habit.

Second, I became increasingly irritated at how many chances he had to pull himself out of the mess, or at least TRY to pull himself out, or had even GOTTEN out and chose so easily to return... I really do think that he behaved in an entirely self-centered, self-destructive way, completely refusing to open his eyes to the truths around him. I guess that's the point, really—that the drugs were a side effect of depressing truths in his life that he was too afraid to acknowledge. Still, I completely understand how after the first few times of listening to him go on about how his life had changed, etc., they would stop believing that he would stay sober. I'm not sure I even believe it now.

I guess that I am glad I read Tweak, if only to open my eyes a bit to just how bad an addiction can be, how strongly deep-seated insecurities and unresolved issues can affect the addition, and how difficult it is to bring oneself out of the cycle; but overall, it frustrated me too much for me to really enjoy it.(less)

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05/16/08

Marianne rated it:

Read in October, 2008

recommended to Marianne by: Heather

For some reaon, I love books about addiction. I think that if I were still pursuing a career in social work that that's where I would be.

Meth is something that is so prevalent in our society, but a drug that I know very little about. This book taught me a lot about how it feels to take Meth and how it has become so common among kids and other users. Having read Beautiful Boy first, I sort of knew the outcome of Nic's story so the element of surprise was gone but it did not in any ...more For some reaon, I love books about addiction. I think that if I were still pursuing a career in social work that that's where I would be.

Meth is something that is so prevalent in our society, but a drug that I know very little about. This book taught me a lot about how it feels to take Meth and how it has become so common among kids and other users. Having read Beautiful Boy first, I sort of knew the outcome of Nic's story so the element of surprise was gone but it did not in any way take away from this book. I was also afraid that the books would be written paralell to each other (his dads view/Nics view of the same event) but that was not the case. In fact, I dont think Nics father was really truly aware of the extent of Nics usage.

The story is haunting and very blunt. He does not mince words and tells everything like it is. There were a few parts that were difficult for me to read, mainly the abcess in his arm and how it felt to get cotton in the needle and then up his arm to his brain. I also could not believe the amount or the variety of the drugs he used. He did not discrimante. If it was available, he tried it.

I knew right away that his relationshp with Zelda was a bad idea and I was so glad when i read that his therapist had picked up on his relationship with Zelda being a reflection of his relationship with his Mom. I sort of picked up on that right away. I also felt that in the beginning of their relationship, when he was still sober, he basically traded one drug for another. The other being her.

I also wonder what finally makes an addict decide to open up and work the program. Nic had been to many rehab centres, had a solid long term sponsor and still wasn't ready to commit to sobriety until it was rehab or jail. Is it a combination of personality's or does it just take that one speical therapist to get to Nics core and help him with the true issues. I loved reading about the different therapies offered at his final rehab, especially the ones that focused on breathing and getting in touch with the physical side of emotions through Somatic Experiencing. What I also found very interesting was the abscence of any mention of the 12 steps in his rehab.
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05/15/08

Heather rated it:

Read in July, 2008

recommended to Heather by: Danny & Justin
recommends it for: Anyone

This book gives us an honest and transparent account of life as an addict. It's hard to imagine what an average day is like for a drug addict, but this book illustrates that for us, including some of the worst days as well. The insight provided on the thoughts in an addict's mind, and how an addict views life and circumstances, is enlightening and intriguing. I believe it will evoke many different emotions for each different reader, as it's a very 'personal' book to read. After 'hearing' what ...more

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04/22/08

Melissa Scholling rated it:

Read in April, 2008

recommended to Melissa by: a friend
recommends it for: anyone who doesn't mind a good cry :)

So this book is written by the son from the book "Beautiful Boy". Some people who know me and know that I have read both of these books now think I might be torturing myself... However I found this book to be helpful in understanding why people make mistakes. I'll admit it was extremely emotional for me, a roller coaster really, complete with tears, breathlessness, and fright! It's amazing to see how drugs can change a person, how their lives can be overtaken in such a powerful way....more

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"I always get so overwhelmed trying to do everything perfectly. I can't do a job and not put everything I have into it. I need to be the best employee, the best co-worker, the best whatever. I need everyone to like me and I just burn out bending over backward to make that happen. Having people be mad at me is my worst fear. I can't stand it. There is this crazy fear I have of being rejected by anyone - even people I don't really care about. It's always better to leave them first, cut all ties, and disappear. They can't hurt me that way - no one can. " More quotes...

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Tweak: Growing Up On Methamphetamines

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