Finding It: And Satisfying My Hunger for Life Without Opening the Fridge

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Finding It: And Satisfying My Hunger for Life Without Opening the Fridge

3.35 of 5 stars 3.35 · rating details · 388 ratings · 70 reviews

Welcome back to chez Bertinelli, where life is as crazy and comical as ever. In revealing talks with her longtime boyfriend, Tom, Valerie gets even more personal about her inner worries: her maternal anxieties about her son, Wolfie (he's fallen in love and, as she writes, "getting your sex talk from Eddie Van Halen wasn't recommended in any of the parenting books I read");...more Welcome back to chez Bertinelli, where life is as crazy and comical as ever. In revealing talks with her longtime boyfriend, Tom, Valerie gets even more personal about her inner worries: her maternal anxieties about her son, Wolfie (he's fallen in love and, as she writes, "getting your sex talk from Eddie Van Halen wasn't recommended in any of the parenting books I read"); the challenges of dealing with a blended family; her mother's own new diet adventure; and a craving for a deeper relationship with a Higher Power ("I have experienced days of inner peace and connectedness with a larger spirit -- twice," she writes. "Why not more often?"). And as if these everyday challenges weren't enough, Valerie is work-ing to maintain her own very public weight loss. She even gets to thinking she might kick it up a notch, shed more weight and get so buff she can wear a bikini -- in public.In this new, inspiring memoir from the beloved actress and author of the bestseller "Losing It," Valerie tells the story of what happens "after" you change your life. It's not all peaches and cream, or even non-fat yogurt.

In "Finding It," Valerie comes face-to-face with hard questions of family, faith, and beachwear, and realizes that she's hungering for another transfor-mation -- to become better, not just thinner. Forget the scale; the real change is happening inside, and Valerie realizes that this is the part of dieting that no one ever talks about -- the reality of keeping the pounds off. Dieting fixes one problem, she discovers, but to maintain that weight loss, she has to work on everything else -- all the reasons she got fat in the first place.Warm and friendly, honest and self-aware -- like a talk with your BFF -- "Finding It" tells of the common worries and frustrations, the funny and fabulous moments in Valerie's publicly private life. Humorous and humble, it is also the emotional story of family and the deep bonds and patterns that persist through generations: for as Valerie transitions to her latest role of motherhood with an increasingly independent son, she connects with her own mother in a profound new way.

With the same winning wit and candor that touched several generations of fans in "Losing It," "Finding It" is an optimistic story for trying times. It's about believing in love and happiness, having faith that both are possible, and finding out that God does want you to enjoy life's desserts -- even when you're on a diet.(less)

Hardcover, 266 pages

Published October 6th 2009 by Free Press (first published 2009)

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Nov 12, 2009 Tanya rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Others who struggle with weight maintenance

Shelves: 2009-books

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. I enjoyed this book more than the first one she wrote because of Valerie Bertinelli's wit and willingness to reveal her story and struggle with weight maintenance so others can learn from it or at least not feel alone. She actually leaves me with much food for thought about weight maintenance. She writes like a girlfriend sharing her thoughts with you while you head out for a walk together.

Here are several quotes that I liked from the book because the really force me to think about my own diffi...more

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Oct 07, 2011 Marsha rated it 3 of 5 stars

Valerie is quite normal for a celebrity and in this book she shows just how normal she is by exposing her insecurities, her temper when she gets upset or frustrated, her disbelief in “how lucky” she has been with her career, and her struggle to keep weight off and in good shape, despite her past struggles to use food to comfort her when she was upset. As a Jenny Craig spokeswoman, she was asked to model in a bikini and Valerie writes about her exercise training and dieting to meet this goal.

Prob...more

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Aug 03, 2011 Debra Oehlberg rated it 4 of 5 stars

I can identify with Valerie Bertinelli in so many ways. We are close in age, and struggle with weight gain. But, unlike Valerie, my accumulated weight came after several health problems that went undiagnosed for years, and simple exercise alone does not make my pounds fall off quickly. I'm also like her in the fact that I really enjoy good food, and want my eating experience to be worth it. But, unlike her, I am not an emotional eater. And, finally, I know the fear of a bikini. But with me, it's...more

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Mar 14, 2010 Vilo rated it 3 of 5 stars

You've all heard that you should not go to the grocery store on an empty stomach. Well, for me stopping by the library to pick up a book for Dave after a 10-hour work day is equivalent. I ended up with about 5 books for me all grabbed from various display shelves on the way to the reserved books rack. This one was a surprisingly satisfying read (no pun intended). Valerie Bertinelli is down to earth, honest, and funny. She wrote an earlier book about losing weight. This one is about "maintenance,...more

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Apr 24, 2013 Cherri rated it 2 of 5 stars

Valerie was miserable being 40 pounds overweight and losing the weight didn't just change her body, it changed her demeanor, her self-esteem and her outlook on life. I guess, if I were a TV actress, I'd be obsessed with my body too. Luckily, I'm not.
I just finished this audio book today. It was good, but not great. Valerie's philosophy and advice about weight loss are not universal. Not everyone is miserable with themselves because of being overweight and not everyone who loses has all their pr...more

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Jul 06, 2010 Katie Christian rated it 3 of 5 stars

While I did find this book entertaining for the most part, every once in a while she would just go off on such an odd tangent that it's hard to 'get' at times. She was basically mocking her boyfriend's religion until she decided to have some faith herself. I have a theory that it's something chemical in some people's brains that makes them relate everything to food. I don't believe she was doing it for the book, I think she actually have a different brain process than I do when thinking about fo...more

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Jan 02, 2012 Tim Chavel rated it 4 of 5 stars

I have been a fan of Valerie Bertinelli since I was a kid watching "One Day at A Time." In this follow up book from "Losing It," Valerie tells how she not only kept the weight off but how she lost even more. This book is more then losing weight and maintaining weight lost, but it is more about her life. I found it very interesting that she seems to be seeking a relationship with the Savior. She mentions several times how she knows there is a higher power and sometimes prays. I know I will contin...more

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Apr 28, 2013 Tricia Andrews rated it 3 of 5 stars

I didn't like this audiobook as much as her first book (Losing It). This is the follow up on how she has managed to keep the weight off while being a Jenny Craig spokesperson and her new marriage. There isn't as much depth and history in this book. It seems like it was thrown together as a followup but it only covers a few years of her life. She talks alot about her son in this book with lots of personal details of his life. Just what every teenage wants his mom to do. I do like that she read th...more

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Dec 21, 2011 Laurie rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites

This on the heels of VB's "Losing It...," I simply couldn't get enough. Being in the same general age range where she started to make real and lasting changes probably helps with the whole connection thing, but much of what she talks about in relation to women's issues is so relatable you would think you're having a heart-to-heart conversation with your best girlfriend. Both Valerie's books (to me) are less about the weight and more so about the changes women need to make on the inside to live t...more

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Aug 16, 2010 adventurat rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: e-book, 2010, biography, non-fiction, self-improvement

Losing It was the story about growing up, getting married, getting fat, getting divorced, and finally, getting the weight off, with Jenny Craig's help. There's a good deal of growing self-awareness in that book, some of the self-discovery that's expected in any "how I lost the weight" story; one of the tools of losing the weight is identifying how and why you put it on in the first place, what your triggers and bad habits are, what attitudes you've developed about food and life and self that nee...more Losing It was the story about growing up, getting married, getting fat, getting divorced, and finally, getting the weight off, with Jenny Craig's help. There's a good deal of growing self-awareness in that book, some of the self-discovery that's expected in any "how I lost the weight" story; one of the tools of losing the weight is identifying how and why you put it on in the first place, what your triggers and bad habits are, what attitudes you've developed about food and life and self that need to change.

This book is all about what happens after you lose the weight, and you enter the phase known as "maintenance" (also known as "the rest of your life"), and how that's different from the losing part. It's not as simple as "hang on to the new habits, let go of the old habits, and keep working out". There's more mental, emotional, and spiritual work involved, or at least there was for Valerie. I've never been there, myself, so I can't comment.

This book is also about Val's voyage back into swimwear: specifically, a bikini, which she wore in yet another Jenny Craig commercial. It's about the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual effort that went into shedding another ten pounds and getting into the best shape of her life in order to wear that bikini in front of millions of people on television. The descriptions of her workouts with her trainer, her efforts to raise her basal metabolic rate from 1300 calories to 3500 calories per day, to make her a more efficient burner of calories, kind of exhausted me. Fair enough to want to weigh in at a feathery 122 for a bikini-clad commercial shoot, but part of me - the not-very-evolved part, probably - wondered whether that level of commitment, of activity, of discipline, is something that I could maintain after I'd achieved the goal of having my picture taken wearing the bikini. I didn't really think so, so it's a good thing that wearing a bikini isn't on my list of weight loss goals.

The most interesting part of this story, for me, was Valerie's spiritual reflections: her feeling that she was missing something in comparison to her boyfriend's connection with God, and the little moments where she felt something that she later realized might be what she'd thought she was missing, including the last one mentioned, which she experiences while walking on a treadmill facing out over the blue ocean, waves lapping at the shore.

...I just didn't figure it out until now, in the gym, when I realized that special connection to God that I had always thought resided in a church wasn't there. it was inside me. Going to church helps some people find it. But there are other ways, too. The point is to find it, and then believe it.

When I was in St. Patrick's, it was as if God had been trying to say, "I'm glad you like the architecture. But look around, here and outside and most importantly inside yourself. I'm everywhere."

Valerie's spiritual journey feels personal without being overly specific or at all prescriptive, and that makes it inspiring rather than intimidating. Which is a nice echo of the weight loss journey story from the first book. (less)

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Jan 12, 2010 Shayna rated it 5 of 5 stars

A fun, honest, quick read... Not as great as the first book, but I love Valerie! One problem I found with this book is, if it's that hard for her to get down to a certain weight and maintain it... that's pretty discouraging to the rest of us ~ who are without personal trainers, marathon & bikini goals and Jenny Craig help... But good for her.. she did it and looks Fabulous... although she has always been adorable :)

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Dec 08, 2011 Erin Martin rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: audio

Ok I love Valerie Bertinelli. But for crying out, I really could have done without her talking on and on about her political views. That was NOT why I wanted to read this book. I DON'T CARE! And her comparisons to the government and her weight loss were so far-fetched that you could just tell she was only doing it to get her political agenda out there. It was SO annoying. She did have some good points and I learned some valuable things from her. But if I wanted to know who she voted for and why,...more

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Jul 01, 2010 Laura rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

I liked this one much more than the first one (Losing It). I'm not sure why....maybe because this one didn't read like a "Behind the Music" for Van Halen! This one was all aroung more interesting to me; less like a biography and more sharing of her everyday experiences and struggles. Honestly, I'm not sure why I ever picked up Losing It in the first place. I was too young to be a fan of One Day at a Time, and I only had a vague idea of who Valerie was to begin with. After reading this one, howev...more

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Aug 04, 2012 Patti rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2012

I loved this follow up to Losing It - a very encouraging read about the difficulties with losing weight and maintaining it. Valerie Bertinelli shares her personal stuggles with finding the reasons behind her eating habits and how to handle her food addictions through new techniques. Very motivational for anyone wanting to lose weight ... and keep it off!

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Jul 30, 2011 Tisha rated it 3 of 5 stars

Maintenance. After Valerie loses 40 pounds she wants to keep it off. This is her struggle to keep the weight off. Its has some valid points but the thing I keep coming back to is that she gets her hair done "every 12 days". I am not sure why this bothers me since I have my roots done too, usually every 10 weeks. Glad I read the book though.

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Feb 19, 2012 Erika Jones rated it 4 of 5 stars

Here's the thing. I got this book at the dollar store! Why do some books end up at the dollar store? In the case of this book, the easy answer is the frequent English grammar problems. But why did this book have so many technical problems? Thats a harder question, and I don't have the answer. What I do know, is that I really liked it anyway. I liked it enough, that when my three request books from the library came in, I finished this one first, even though the countdown clock had started on my l...more

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Oct 07, 2010 Tara D-K rated it 4 of 5 stars

I love VB! I think she's a little wacky, but who isn't? She's honest, as usual, in this book. I got a little worried with the God/spirituality stuff, but she doesn't push it, it's just her thoughts on finding some kind of spirituality. I found it touching and interesting. I love that she just bears all her soul, warts and all.

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Oct 27, 2009 JoAnn Jordan rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: books-read-in-2009

This is a very good book about Valerie's adventures in maintaining her weight and living her life more fully. She overcomes obstacles and comes to a better understanding of what her life means.

I highly recommend this book to anyone who has struggled with weight or simply with the difficulties of daily life.

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Dec 03, 2009 Carol rated it 3 of 5 stars

This is a frivolous memoir written after the success of her first book about her journey in losing weight. I could not get interested in reading about her trying to have "the sex talk" with her son. It is entertaining and still inspirational but just barely.

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Jul 09, 2011 Teri Nelson rated it 3 of 5 stars

Valerie show that life can go on and move forward. It's not always easy, but she tells how she couldn't help herself without God and sharing your beliefs can open up doors for other people. In the end nothing can be accomplished without His Grace.

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Jul 30, 2011 Maria Potts-tussing rated it 3 of 5 stars

Ok so this one was good. Inspirational!! I was hooked and excited and couldn't wait to read more. Then...she admits to having a personal trainer...talk about a let down. I struggled to finish the last few chapters from the disapointment.

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Feb 26, 2011 Susie rated it 3 of 5 stars

Includes more of the internal journey of her current approach to food than the external. Conversational style;as if you catching up with an old friend. Motivating!

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Nov 10, 2009 Gayle rated it 3 of 5 stars

I just started listening to the audio narrated by the author. Her playful tone sucked me right in.

I liked it but it's a good thing we have so much in common such as age, motherhood and politics.

It was a decent non-fiction listen but I highly DO NOT recommend it if you have a lot of weight to lose or are Republican. I'll leave it there.

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Jul 24, 2010 Sio rated it 4 of 5 stars

I really enjoyed this second book from Valerie Bertinelli. I'm in "maintenance" mode myself after having lost 50-odd pounds in the last couple of years, and what she's gone through really spoke to me.

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Dec 19, 2009 Jenny Garone rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: bio-memoir

Some people, at particular stages in their lives, might be able to take a lot away from this book. I wanted to, but it just wasn't there for me.

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Dec 23, 2009 Plschaus is currently reading it

I'm enjoying it. I like her style and it helps to know that even celebrities have the same struggles when it comes to self image.

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May 31, 2012 Connie Becerra rated it 3 of 5 stars

Found this book at work and read it. Valerie has an interesting life and it was fun to read. I only wish her the best.

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Jan 27, 2010 Barb rated it 3 of 5 stars

I'm always interested in people's stories and Valerie's is pretty good. Some of her "a-ha" moments are one's I found a long time ago, but it's a pretty good read. She is a little wordy.

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Jan 23, 2010 Barbara rated it 4 of 5 stars

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

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Feb 23, 2013 Rasa rated it 2 of 5 stars

I liked "Losing It," but by the end of this one, I just couldn't bring myself to care anymore. Sorry, Val.

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