Outrageous, raw, and painfully funny true stories straight from the life of the actor, comedian, and much-loved cast member of The...
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Nov 19, 2008
Todd
rated it: 
As a genius, I require highly intellectual stimulus to keep from getting bored. Fortunately The Howard Stern Show provides such stimulus and helps me think my genius thoughts. In this small way alone Howard Stern helps make the world a better place.
I was browsing on my Kindle a few nights ago and downloaded Too Fat To Fish on an impulse. It was between that and Shakespeare's comedies. I've read Shakespeare so many times that I decided to download the Lange.
I'm not sure wh More...
I was browsing on my Kindle a few nights ago and downloaded Too Fat To Fish on an impulse. It was between that and Shakespeare's comedies. I've read Shakespeare so many times that I decided to download the Lange.
I'm not sure wh More...
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Mar 26, 2009
Jen
rated it: 
This was the worst autobiography I've ever read in my life. Artie Lange has lived a boring life, no different from any other loser alcoholic/addict. I was bored out of my mind the entire time and it took me 2 weeks to finish this because I kept putting it down. The only reason I stuck with it was because I kept thinking that it would have to get better!
The parts of the book where he describes vomiting and crapping all over himself are totally disgusting and absolutely unnecessary.
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The parts of the book where he describes vomiting and crapping all over himself are totally disgusting and absolutely unnecessary.
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Jan 18, 2009
Jamie
rated it:
I probably wouldn't have read this but after hearing the travails of making the audiobook on the Stern show, I couldn't help but listen. Artie is a GREAT storyteller, but it definitely took him time to settle into reading. Good God! I think, what's this gonna sound like when Rev. Bob Levy takes over? Gary reads 2nd and it took me a while to remember that this was Artie's story and not Gary's because you get so used to the voices of the Stern show people. Rev. Bob was hilarious because he didn't
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Jun 30, 2009
Evan
rated it:
Just resumed listening to this after a hiatus...
FINAL:
Artie is a classic conflicted addictive personality. Making and breaking promises, burning bridges, spending all his money recklessly, going into debt, disappointing everyone who loves him, nearly dying from OD's several times, going cold turkey then falling off the wagon, blowing career opportunities; laughing at himself and feeling sorry for himself and saying "fuck you" to everyone then realizing he was wrong. Overdri More...
FINAL:
Artie is a classic conflicted addictive personality. Making and breaking promises, burning bridges, spending all his money recklessly, going into debt, disappointing everyone who loves him, nearly dying from OD's several times, going cold turkey then falling off the wagon, blowing career opportunities; laughing at himself and feeling sorry for himself and saying "fuck you" to everyone then realizing he was wrong. Overdri More...
Apr 01, 2009
Michelle
rated it: 
I heard Terry Gross interview Artie on Fresh Air, and he came across as such a sweet, self-aware, if screwed-up guy. I think that if I had "read" Too Fat to Fish as an audio book that same likable personality may have come across. But as I read it in print form, perhaps that is why I ended up being mostly frustrated and annoyed with his behavior. This was only worsened by the fact that right before I finished the book, I did a little online research to see what Artie is up to at the mo
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Jan 15, 2009
Karen
rated it: 
So this book was recommended to me by one of my managers, a guy who really doesn't read and pretty much the last person I would ever expect to get a book recommendation from. I don't listen to Howard Stern and didn't know who Artie Lange was before starting this book. I went for it based on the recommendation.
I am glad I did. This memoir had a bit of everything. In many parts it had me laughing, loved the "Too Fat to Fish story." I cried ( a rarity for me) when he was talki More...
I am glad I did. This memoir had a bit of everything. In many parts it had me laughing, loved the "Too Fat to Fish story." I cried ( a rarity for me) when he was talki More...
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Nov 28, 2008
Sean
rated it:
I knew a lot of these stories from listening to the "Howard Stern Show". However Artie gives more details that were previously unknown to anyone but himself. It made for an interesting read overall. I felt the book was very sweet at times and made me wish Artie would just get his shit together already. If you're a fan of Artie or the Howard Stern Show its worth the read.
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Sep 14, 2010
Melanie
rated it:
This book has made me wonder about specialties in the field of ghost writing.
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Feb 09, 2009
Sarah
rated it:
I liked this book! I really didn't know too much about Artie before I read the book so I didn't bore me at all. This book made me never ever want to do any type of drugs, not that I ever wanted to before, but this shit made it offical, just reading the chapter pig in shit was enough. He really is a great story teller and it was pretty funny, more then once I laughed out loud. Hopefully he comes out with another book and maybe actually cleans up! But I guess that wouldn't be too much fun to read
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Dec 22, 2008
Eric
rated it:
Christ, what a fuck-up this guy is. Anybody who has listened to the Stern show probably already heard everything in this book. Anybody who doesn't listen to the Stern show probably isn't at all interested. It feels like co-writer Anthony Bozza was given the task to transcribe these stories from Artie telling them live on Stern. Artie's life can be summed up pretty simply. Here's the book in a nutshell:
"I had <good thing> going on, was doing better in life than I ever More...
"I had <good thing> going on, was doing better in life than I ever More...
Dec 24, 2008
The stories are crazy. I wouldn't want to be friends with Artie, but I think he's kind of a genius. He is a story-teller and the way he sees the world and himself in the world makes for him stumbling in to the main gist of some screwed up stories.
When in a diner parking lot in his dad's handicapped van, he ordered a deluxe from his new Brazilian friend because that's what he would have called a parallel order if he were in the diner.
Brilliant and then all the sorrow for humanity sets i
When in a diner parking lot in his dad's handicapped van, he ordered a deluxe from his new Brazilian friend because that's what he would have called a parallel order if he were in the diner.
Brilliant and then all the sorrow for humanity sets i
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Feb 17, 2011
Andrew
rated it:
3.5 STARS
Artie Lange would hate me if he met me. He seems to make the wrong decision every time, and it's difficult, even as an outsider, to be forgiving. Chapter after chapter is epic cock-up after unfathomable stupidity and poor self control. But he's hilarious, and so maybe it's forgivable. It shouldn't be, but it is.
He makes many references to guardian angels in his life, and seems to be incredibly lucky. Without his family, Dana, Orlando Jones, and numerous others, More...
Artie Lange would hate me if he met me. He seems to make the wrong decision every time, and it's difficult, even as an outsider, to be forgiving. Chapter after chapter is epic cock-up after unfathomable stupidity and poor self control. But he's hilarious, and so maybe it's forgivable. It shouldn't be, but it is.
He makes many references to guardian angels in his life, and seems to be incredibly lucky. Without his family, Dana, Orlando Jones, and numerous others, More...
Jan 15, 2011
Dan
rated it:
I listened to the audiobook last term while waiting for the bus. It was ok, he is pretty funny. The biggest problem I had with the book was his self-deprecating humor. It got really depressing, and frankly, pathetic. One day I was listening to his story while stressed out about school and he was going off on a particularly dark part of his life and it actually put me in a bad mood for the rest of the day. I also didn't appreciate how lightly he took his condition...he would dismiss his drug
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Dec 28, 2010
I don't exaggerate when I say this is one of the funniest books that I've ever read, and most certainly the funniest memoir I've ever picked up. It's very rare that you actually laugh out loud while reading a book, but Artie Lange's moving autobiography is one of the exceptions to this general rule. As hilarious as it is, it's also heartbreaking. Navigating his way through his father's extended paralysis and eventual death, his repeated attempts to kick drug and alcohol addiction, and his strugg
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Sep 04, 2009
Michelle
rated it:
Boy... how did I come across this one? That's easy. I picked it up for my husband and, of course, it was in the bathroom ready to be read. It seems so natural that this read would begin on the toilet! Well, I started reading it and just kept coming back to it. Might as well admit it: This high-brow literary junkie is enjoying a guilty pleasure! From Dickens to Artie Lange! You can't say my tastes are not diverse!
Really though,if you want to better acquaint yourself with the p More...
Really though,if you want to better acquaint yourself with the p More...
Jan 19, 2009
Betty
rated it:
I was a little unsure when I received this book to review, but I was actually pleasantly surprised. Artie Lange, stand-up comic, actor, and a part of the Howard Stern show, did not sound like a book I would be able to get through. Yes, it was raw. Yes, it was crude, but certainly not to the extent I anticipated. In fact, this is a very personal, honest story of a man with many problems to overcome. Swinging back and forth between depression and paranoia, he is a perfect candidate for addiction o
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Oct 09, 2010
Erin
rated it:
I didn't know much about Artie Lange - never watched "MadTV", don't listen to Howard Stern, don't recall seeing him in any movies, but some of my friends think he's a hysterical comedian, so I gave this a try. Huge waste of time. Lange has received break after break and has squandered each and every one of them with his drug abuse. He makes no bones about the fact that he's an ass, but seems to believe that second/third/fourth chances are his due. And there is nothing funny about t
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Apr 29, 2009
Jennifer
rated it:
Book Overview
This is the autobiography of Artie Lange -- perhaps best known as a member of The Howard Stern Show, which he joined in 2001. He was also on MADtv during the first season and has had roles in movies such as Dirty Work and Beer League. He is also a stand-up comedian who performs all over the country.
Born into a working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, Mr. Lange was a "typical" American kid -- obsessed with sports, girls ... and comedy. At age 18, More...
This is the autobiography of Artie Lange -- perhaps best known as a member of The Howard Stern Show, which he joined in 2001. He was also on MADtv during the first season and has had roles in movies such as Dirty Work and Beer League. He is also a stand-up comedian who performs all over the country.
Born into a working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, Mr. Lange was a "typical" American kid -- obsessed with sports, girls ... and comedy. At age 18, More...
Apr 07, 2009
Wes
rated it:
A collection of anecdotes from Artie's life more than an actual, linear "biography", most of the stories have already been told on the Howard Stern Show. But there is also a lot that has been left untold until this point. Part of Lange's appeal is his wild, too-crazy-to-be-true stories and the animated way in which he tells them. Sadly, the stories have their roots in a deep-seated cocaine and heroin addiction, leaving the reader/listener say "oh, no, Artie...". The audio bo
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Nov 21, 2008
Lee Anne
rated it:
Artie, as any Stern fan knows, is a great storyteller, and this book is no exception. Artie, as any Stern fan also knows, has the lowest self-esteem, worst impulse control, highest self-sabotage and loathing of just about anyone you've ever heard of. So this book is funny, yes, and full of stories you've heard before, fleshed out in un-Howard-interrupted detail, but it's also really sad. But maybe it's like Robin said on 11/20/08's show--Artie likes it when people say, "Poor Artie"
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Aug 30, 2010
Dana
rated it:
To be honest, I didn't know much about Artie Lange in general until my bf got me a Sirius radio and opened my ears to the wildly entertaining Howard100 station. I'd seen this book around at a few local stores, and it was recommended to me when I'd expressed an interest in Stern's out-of-print memoir, Private Parts.
My dad gave me an Amazon Kindle for my birthday, even though I'd proclaimed I'd never have one since I liked books too much. But I tried it, got used to it, and have decided that More...
My dad gave me an Amazon Kindle for my birthday, even though I'd proclaimed I'd never have one since I liked books too much. But I tried it, got used to it, and have decided that More...
Jan 12, 2010
Darth
rated it:
This was pretty good.
Though I have never been a fan of Artie Lang - I also have never disliked him, and and saw him more as an archtype than a person.
I had seen him on MadTV and in a few of his films, and somehow his book had found its way to my pile of stuff waiting to be read.
After his recent suicide attempt, I thought I would move this up a bit in the rotation.
The story, or more accurately stories in this book go a long way toward painting the p More...
Though I have never been a fan of Artie Lang - I also have never disliked him, and and saw him more as an archtype than a person.
I had seen him on MadTV and in a few of his films, and somehow his book had found its way to my pile of stuff waiting to be read.
After his recent suicide attempt, I thought I would move this up a bit in the rotation.
The story, or more accurately stories in this book go a long way toward painting the p More...
Jun 27, 2010
Sera
rated it:
Interesting, honest and very sad. What I found fascinating about Lange's link to addiction is that it was within himself. He had had a great childhood - his parents were cool people and there was no indication of addiction in any other family members. There's no abuse and except for a horrible family tragedy, there's really nothing bad that happened to this guy except for what he himself caused. Lange was just a bit off from other people and he continues to struggle with his own inner demons
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Jan 14, 2009
New York Nick
rated it:
If you know Artie then you'll love this book. Artie is a fantastic story teller. His method of building excitement and anticipation combined with perfect comedic punchlines are the hallmark of a professional who is a master of his craft. This book is brutally honest about his drug, drink and gambling addictions as well as how he dealt with (or didn't) his father's crippling injury and subsequent death.
Overall, the book had me rolling with laughter at some points and deeply saddened More...
Overall, the book had me rolling with laughter at some points and deeply saddened More...
Jan 18, 2012
Jonathan
rated it:
Very entertaining, especially the account of running on to the field after watching the Yankees win in the late 1970's.
I was 10 when me and my two brothers followed the 1978 Yankees to their World Series victory. We used to take the MetroNorth commuter train to Grand Central Station from Westchester and then ride those un-air-conditioned graffiti-covered subways up to the old, new Yankee Stadium. Back then, the Star-Spangled Banner was frequently sung live with perfect class by Metr More...
I was 10 when me and my two brothers followed the 1978 Yankees to their World Series victory. We used to take the MetroNorth commuter train to Grand Central Station from Westchester and then ride those un-air-conditioned graffiti-covered subways up to the old, new Yankee Stadium. Back then, the Star-Spangled Banner was frequently sung live with perfect class by Metr More...
Jun 09, 2009
Kristin
rated it:
Since I am not a "fan" of Artie Lange's, I was hesitant to read this book. I noticed a friend read it and liked it, so I thought what the heck!
This book made me think that everyone should write their own book. Honestly, you never know what people have done in their lives, and this book surprised me with it's honesty. A perfect example of the saying, "until you walk a mile in their shoes." I could relate to much of what Artie has gone through in his life, though my More...
This book made me think that everyone should write their own book. Honestly, you never know what people have done in their lives, and this book surprised me with it's honesty. A perfect example of the saying, "until you walk a mile in their shoes." I could relate to much of what Artie has gone through in his life, though my More...
Jun 20, 2009
Maya
rated it:
This qualifies as an intense skimming which I enjoyed very much (also Shayla this was another one that I put on hold and was like the 100th person but somehow got bumped up.)
I like Artie's brutal honesty a lot. I don't think I'll ever feel like he was a good Jackie replacement. It's pretty clear to me from a psychological perspective Howard got someone he could run over and control completely.
OK that's a complete aside and has nothing to do with the book. It's really More...
I like Artie's brutal honesty a lot. I don't think I'll ever feel like he was a good Jackie replacement. It's pretty clear to me from a psychological perspective Howard got someone he could run over and control completely.
OK that's a complete aside and has nothing to do with the book. It's really More...
Aug 24, 2009
Chris
rated it:
I would imagine I am the only person reading Artie Lange's autobiography based on an interview I heard with the actor on NPR's Fresh Air. Honestly, I loved Stern when he was on terrestrial radio but I haven't heard word one of his Sirius/XFM work, but I had forgotten about Lange before that interview.
Too Fat to Fish is an enjoyable confessional in the vein of (surprise!) Howard Stern's Private Parts. Not the type of literature that's going to change your view of the world, but you k More...
Too Fat to Fish is an enjoyable confessional in the vein of (surprise!) Howard Stern's Private Parts. Not the type of literature that's going to change your view of the world, but you k More...
Jan 25, 2009
Benjamin
rated it:
This is not your typical celebrity puff piece put together by some ghost-writer. Lange presents himself to the world laid bare for the world to see. Anyone who is a fan of the Stern show will know many of the stories already. That doesn't diminish their impact on the printed page. Those who don't listen will appreciate Lange's honesty and frankness when detailing his various problems with drugs and addiction. Knowing that Lange is currently struggling with a heroin problem and may not live
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Oct 04, 2009
Matt
rated it:
I didn't know who Artie Lange was before I read this book, and I now realise I wasn't missing much - Lange comes across as a wilfully ignorant drug-addled fuck up with massive daddy issues. Too Fat To Fish is mainly a document of his frequent downward spirals into all-consuming drug use, but little insight is given for his selfish and destructive behaviour outside of "and then I fucked up again because that's what I always do". Given that Lange is supposedly a comedian, there is little
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