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This is Where I Leave You

3.87 of 5 stars 3.87  ·  rating details  ·  88,572 ratings  ·  10,030 reviews
The death of Judd Foxman’s father marks the first time that the entire Foxman family—including Judd’s mother, brothers, and sister—have been together in years. Conspicuously absent: Judd’s wife, Jen, whose fourteen-month affair with Judd’s radio-shock-jock boss has recently become painfully public.

Simultaneously mourning the death of his father and the demise of his marria
Hardcover, 339 pages
Published August 6th 2009 by Orion (first published 2009)
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Mary Hogan This is one of the few times I saw the movie BEFORE reading the book. Wish I hadn't. The movie was funny and sweet, but the book had the depth and…moreThis is one of the few times I saw the movie BEFORE reading the book. Wish I hadn't. The movie was funny and sweet, but the book had the depth and heart that so many movies miss. Book is definitely better. Don't think this is a spoiler to say that the BOOK scene where Judd walks in on his wife was so heartbreakingly funny I reread it over and over.(less)
Mark Treble Pathos, pure and simple. There are lighter moments and there are funny scenes. The book, though, is best read as pathos.
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I picked up this book on the recommendation of an acquaintance whose taste I trust. And in reading the dust jacket flap, I was immediately drawn in by the idea of the book: a family -- four siblings -- mourning the death of their father, coming together for seven days to sit shiva. The book promised to be witty and biting, an unforgiving look at family dynamic. I'm in. Sign me up.


For sure there was some great language in here. Some sharp observations about disappointment and growing up and lo

Voice Over: Judd Foxman had the perfect job...

(on-air antics at the radio station; his boss makes a sexist joke)

VO: the perfect girl...

(hot young starlet (Jessica Biel?) smiles at camera)

VO: The perfect life... Until one day, it left him behind.

(smiling, Judd carries an ornate birthday cake into a bedroom. "Surprise, honey! Happy birthday!" Flash cut: Biel in bed, looking over a man's shoulder. "Judd!" The man turns, and it's Judd's boss. "Foxman! How's it hanging?" Back to Judd, who flings the
Shelby *wants some flying monkeys*
Jan 25, 2015 Shelby *wants some flying monkeys* rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommended to Shelby *wants some flying monkeys* by: Kelly (and the Book Boar) and Snotchocheez

I got book pushed into reading this book. Kelly and Snotchocheez both rated this book highly and I usually somewhat agree with them on books so I requested this sucker from the library.

And..I loved it.

How to get a five star review from this hateful reader? Characters that are so real that I expect them to drive up my driveway. Characters that have no filter on their mouths or their thoughts. A fucked up family that makes mine not look as bad.

I'm not going to tell you what the book is about.
A grating combination of trying too hard to be funny, casual misogyny, and generally unsympathetic characters. Tropper also seems completely obsessed with judging the physiognomy and physiques of all of the characters, including minor ones that just show up to sit shiva or whatever. Heaven forbid that you grow old and expose any skin, or wear low-riding jeans postpartum. Everyone is physically icky except for the shining goddess of a wife who cheated on him, and all the women about whom he makes ...more
Does this story sound like it’d tickle your funny bone? Judd Foxman and his wife Jen lost a baby during the last months of her pregnancy. A year later, he catches her in bed with his boss, a crude radio shock-jock. Months after that, Judd doesn’t have a job and is living in a crappy apartment when he gets the news that his father finally died after long battle with cancer. Just then, Jen drops by to let him know that she’s pregnant. Judd’s even more shocked to learn that his father’s last reques ...more
Sep 23, 2015 Jen rated it 4 of 5 stars
Shelves: own
Judd Foxwell is a broken, damaged man. He has found his wife cheating on him with his boss and then he gets the call his terminally ill father has passed away. His dying wish: to have his family - non practicing Jews - sit shiva for 7 days as final tribute to him in death. Except the 7 days are more like a forced quarantine for Judd and his 4 siblings. What ensues is a hot mess of grudges as wounds are reopened but as part of that process, they are finally given a chance to heal. This is a story ...more
This book is weak. I’m not usually a fan of novels that think they can hold their own merit on nothing but shock value and really bad sexual innuendos—I’m pretty sure this book may have overestimated itself. I’d even feel bad for it, but the fact that its shallow cliché-ness seems to beg for a Hollywood deal rather sucks up any pity I might have otherwise had.
Defines a new genre: "dick lit." A few moments of profound human interactions amid a sea of objectifying comments about women. Not a single female character passes by the author without some mention of her attractiveness or lack of as a sole criterion of her worth. Despicable.
Crystal Craig

Recommended Reading

I started this book yesterday afternoon after picking up all four books I currently have on the go and hardly getting through a page before tossing them aside frustrated. I'm not in a rut, really, I'm not. I want to read, but nothing was grabbing my attention. Friends tried to help, asking me what I was in the mood for. Honestly, I had no clue. I have a list of books I want to finish by the end of this year, but that doesn't mean anything if I'm not in the mood. A Sudden Lig
Hunger For Knowledge
Update 09/05/2015: The movie was not living up to the potential of the book. It was worth 3 stars.

I'm sucker for family drama, I am sucker for dysfunctional family relationships. Being a part of dysfunctional family is without a doubt less than fun. But to us, the ones who are silently watching the family fall out taking a place, it is somewhat a treat. You learn a lot of human nature while enjoying your mental popcorn middle of an humorous family confrontation.

That in mind, I am a big fan of H
Meh. This book was fine, but it wasn't good. My main problem is that there seemed to be a lot of anger at and objectifying of women on the part of the main character, Judd Foxman. There was a lot of talking about women (both young and old) as body parts (though to be fair, this happened a lot with the descriptions of men too) and as vehicles for Judd's fantasies. I get it that his wife cheated on him, but still I didn't like this part of the narrative. Maybe I just wasn't supposed to like Judd a ...more

-Probably one of the most effective combinations of heartbreaking and hilarious I've ever read.

-Something about it is cinematic, and almost begs to be turned into a movie (one that won't be as good as the book, of course), and subsequently a few of the plot points feel just very slightly bordering on cliché.

-It took me most of the book before I began to realize that, due to the narrator's state of depression, he's a bit hard to like. But at the same time, it's his wry observations that make the
"Seven days?"

"That's how long it takes to sit shiva."

"We're not really going to do this, are we?"

You have my deepest sympathies. I don't want to spend seven days with people I like much less spend them with my family.

Well, a dying wish is a dying wish, and when patriarch Mort Foxman requests that his family sit shiva, well, DAMMIT!, they'd better do it. So, Judd, the narrator, moves back to the old homestead for seven days of communing with his three siblings and a whole lot of ghosts-of-not-so-
Being married to Jonathan Tropper could scare a woman to death. This man knows women, their thoughts, what motivates them, their foibles, their intellects. He can put it all out there, too. Besides, he's a very sexy writer--he knows men, too, especially the side of them that has that morning wood thing going on all day, every day. But Tropper is not out for anything other than to spin a really great yarn about a family of grown children who haven't really gotten along very well for most of their ...more
Judd Foxman had a content but not always perfect marriage to the woman of his dreams. And then, I guess because Life just enjoys being an asshole, Life knocks Judd down. Judd and his wife lose their first baby, which causes Judd to lose his wife to his boss, which causes Judd to lose his job. And, because Life in this book likes to remorselessly kick people while they're down, Judd loses his father to cancer. And just when you think things can't get any worse, Judd finds out that his atheist fat ...more
What a gem of a book. I am so happy I stumbled across this book in my library, literally just looked up while sneaking glances at the shelves over my little boy's shoulders at library story time. Recognised the title and picked it up straight away. This story follows the Foxman family while they complete the seven day period of mourning and are observing Shiva after the death of their father, Mort. The story is told from son Judd's point of view, and his fathers' death could not have happened at ...more
Five. Five. Five.

Fifty pages in and Tropper had declared himself one of my favorite authors. I will be reading more of his work ASAP.

Two words - Fucking hilarious.

Sex, Drugs, Love, abundance. Love it.

I can't decide which I was drawn to more, Tropper's sarcastic wit or the not-so-subtle family dysfunction. I loved the idea of the four siblings and the erratic mother coming together to mourn the death of their father/husband. I fell in love with each of the siblings at some point or ano
Three stars feels a little generous because though the premise is promising (sitting shiva for their father, dysfuctional family must Learn to Get Along or Not) and it sailed along lightly (I could practically see the movie in my mind) the great big giant dollop of misogyny heaped on top really turned my stomach. Judd's constant snipes at women and their weight problems and their hotness quotient and typical male writers crap about the drag of being slave to their sex drive and the drag of being ...more
This was the first Jonathan Tropper book I read and I'm so glad I decided to pick it up. I work in a bookstore and this book kept catching my eye because of the simplicity of the design. Anyway, our main character is home to mourn the death of his father. Meanwhile, his personal life is falling to pieces. His family is like one big sitcom with twisting stories that most of us can only imagine. By the time I reached the end of the book, I was praying that there were more pages that had just falle ...more
Jr Bacdayan

I’ve often wondered how it feels like to be divorced. Not that I wanna be, mind you. All I’m thinking about is how two people who share love and have great chemistry can ruin something so beautiful. Remember Katy Perry and Russell Brand? I mean those two both got long black hair and they are both into pop I think that’s destiny right there like how crazy is it that they’re now divorced. There’s also Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries, their names both start with the letter K and they both look li
Kelly (and the Book Boar)
Find all of my reviews at:

Did you catch the movie preview yesterday, folks??????

Mort Foxman has passed away after a long battle with stomach cancer. His dying wish was for the family to sit shiva. That means Judd Foxman will have to spend seven days with three siblings and their spouses/significant others that he hasn’t seen in years. While juggling the plethora of mourners who come to pay their respects each day, Judd al
Rebecca Foster
Update: I hardly ever say this, but watch the movie instead. It’s funnier, less raunchy, and perfectly cast.

“Life is huge, but it can turn on a dime.” This is a dysfunctional family novel with a twist: it’s set over the seven days the four Foxman kids spend sitting shiva for their dead father. They’re secular Jews who attend temple a few times a year, but apparently it was Mort’s last wish. So here they are: narrator Judd, whose wife left him for his boss; oldest brother Paul, who runs the famil
Angela M

3.5 stars if I could but rounded up to 4 because it really made me laugh .

This book is very funny a lot of the time and it's sometimes sad , sometimes irreverent and borderline obscene at times but this book is always entertaining . If profanity bothers you, I'd say maybe you should skip it .

This is the story of a totally dysfunctional family coming together to sit shiva for their father. During these seven days we learn about their past and their present problems and some of the dialog is reall
Tropper is a talented writer. His previoous books prove that. Unfortunately, in this book, you can see him trying to prove it. There are some passages that are well written and fit perfectly to the flow of the story. There are others that read like an observance or thought that he jotted down in his writing journal once upon a time, rediscovered it when he was writing this book, and forced a situation where he could use the phrase. It's too clever for its own good.

I also feel that Tropper's inne
I wasn't expecting to love this as much as I did.

I think certain books hit you harder at certain points in your life, and this particular book couldn't have hit me at a better place. The story resonated with me and I could relate to the banter between the characters and the dysfunction was all too real. There were many moments where I literally laughed out loud, and realized how truly accurate the narrator was in his moments of glorified clarity.

Judd Foxman is our narrator- an insightful, humoro
This book made me think... if I were a character in a generic pseudo-indie dramedy what all would happen?

I'm thinking I would be a slightly bitter divorcee who chain smokes and uses scathing sarcasm as a defense mechanism. Coming home would unleash a fury of hilarious down home characters who would be surprised at my current state of bitchiness but would still embrace me, slowly chipping away at my hard exterior until my slightly warmer (still bitchy) interior is exposed. Maybe my ex-husband wou
Hilarious, sad, poignant, wise - but mostly hilarious. I read so many serious "dramas" and mystery/thrillers that this was like a breath of fresh air. I've seen the criticisms that it relied too heavily on crude sexual jokes and references and was clearly written with a film adaptation in mind - and these are likely true, but it was just so purely enjoyable that that doesn't bother me at all.
Around the same time Judd loses his father, he walks in on his wife of 10 years having sex with his boss. In their bedroom. Pretty vivid and erotic scene the narrator describes. Soon, Judd learns that his father's last wish was for the family to sit shiva (a 7-day ordeal). Some of the book centers around this weird family saga as you meet the characters through Judd's eyes as he flips to present and past tense, giving you the story as it unfolds at the shiva sit-in, and reflecting on his married ...more
Funny, profane and ultimately very insightful story centered around a Jewish family sitting shiva for their recently deceased father. I loved it! What a family, though. Egads. Can't wait to see the movie coming out soon - seems like Judd Foxman was just written to be played by Jason Bateman, doesn't it?

Recommend, but if you are easily offended, you'd best pass on this one.
To the critics who compare the Foxmans to the Bluth family, it's a comparison well made.

"This is Where I Leave You" tells the story of the Foxman family — four siblings and a mother — grieving the death of their father who they believe wants them all to sit shiva (they are Jewish) for the week following his death.

The book is told from the voice of Judd Foxman, who joins in the shiva just as his life is falling apart: a cheating spouse who tells him on the day of his father's death that she's pr
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Spines and Vines : November 2015 - This is Where I Leave You 15 16 Nov 22, 2015 03:40PM  
Should writers try to describe sex? 5 60 Nov 18, 2015 08:59PM  
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2015 Reading Chal...: This is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper 2 47 Feb 06, 2015 07:58PM  
2015 Reading Chal...: This Is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper 14 85 Jan 19, 2015 11:36AM  
  • Domestic Violets
  • Labor Day
  • Admission
  • The Financial Lives of the Poets
  • Blue Boy
  • Await Your Reply
  • Salvage the Bones
  • Heft
  • Where'd You Go, Bernadette
  • A Friend of the Family
  • Serena
  • Love and Other Impossible Pursuits
  • The Family Man
  • Every Last One
  • American Wife
  • What Remains: A Memoir of Fate, Friendship, and Love
  • Euphoria
  • The Sugar Frosted Nutsack
Jonathan Tropper is the author of Everything Changes, The Book of Joe , which was a Booksense selection, and Plan B. He lives with his wife, Elizabeth, and their children in Westchester, New York, where he teaches writing at Manhattanville College. How To Talk To A Widower was optioned by Paramount Pictures, and Everything Changes and The Book of Joe are also in development as feature films.

More about Jonathan Tropper...

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“You have to look at what you have right in front of you, at what it could be, and stop measuring it against what you've lost. I know this to be wise and true, just as I know that pretty much no one can do it.” 273 likes
“It would be a terrible mistake to go through life thinking that people are the sum total of what you see.” 225 likes
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