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73rd out of 100 books
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You Can't Say You Can't Play
Who of us cannot remember the pain and humiliation of being rejected by our classmates? However thick-skinned or immune to such assaults we may become as adults, the memory of those early exclusions is as palpable to each of us today as it is common to human experience. We remember the uncertainty of separating from our home and entering school as strangers and, more than
...morePaperback, 144 pages
Published
July 16th 1993
by Harvard University Press
(first published 1992)
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"Can't say, can't play" is sort of a mantra at our kids school and according to the boys' current 1st grade teacher, this is where the movement began.
Wow, I just checked and according to the edition I have, the initial copyright on this is just 1992? I would have thought this was more of a late 60's or early 70's by-product. It has an aura of the hippie hangover (not at all a bad thing in my world necessarily...).
Here's an excerpt taken from towards the end...
...more
Wow, I just checked and according to the edition I have, the initial copyright on this is just 1992? I would have thought this was more of a late 60's or early 70's by-product. It has an aura of the hippie hangover (not at all a bad thing in my world necessarily...).
Here's an excerpt taken from towards the end...
...more
While I totally agree that the issue of exclusion in classrooms must be tackled by teachers, I found this book to be an awful read. I really did not enjoy the author's style of writing and generally found it rather over-the-top. Also, the whole concept of the book seemed to be arguing a point that most ECE teachers already agree with at this point. I felt that the author/teacher was just too reticent in establishing classroom norms that she knew were necessary. She seemed to alternate betwee...more
Jill
rated it
·
review of another edition
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
Primary teachers
Recommended to Jill by:
Best Friends, Worst Enemies
I chose to read this book after reading part of Best Friends, Worst Enemies: Understanding the Social Lives of Children. This book was about a teacher at the University of Chicago lab school who taught Kindergarten and noticed that specific children were being rejected during playtime.
Although this book is not new by any means (it was written in 1993), I am facing the same issues that this author did in her Kindergarten classroom. Every day, one of my students comes up to me and says, ...more
Although this book is not new by any means (it was written in 1993), I am facing the same issues that this author did in her Kindergarten classroom. Every day, one of my students comes up to me and says, ...more
Paley weaves several threads together in this book: a story she made up to guide her kindergarten children toward the inclusive ethic indicated in the title, the trajectory of her children's responses to this radical norm, and the commentary that goes with teacher's inquiry into her practice. I like the book for all these purposes and will use it with language arts teachers and with teachers doing action research projects. In terms of the capacity of narrative to scaffold advances in civilizat...more
It's an interesting question for people who have or especially who work with children. Is it ever OK to say, "You can't play"? Vivian Paley, a renowned kindergarten teacher, found children's rejection and exclusion was causing significant unhappiness in her classroom, to the point, she believed, of affecting some children's ability to focus and learn. This book follows her proposal of, and eventual implementation of, a new class rule: You can't say you can't play. Paley is an expe...more
This is a quick read. Vivian is describing her process with her kindergarten class of adding the rule. You can't say, "you can't play." While I am usually more of a straight delivery sort of person, her full weave of thought process, fantasy, classroom reality and her own personal reality within the framework reminds me of my Aunt who also teaches. The combined, intertwined fabric lifts the entire idea up like a blanket about to be laid over a freshly made bed and settles satisfactori...more
Don't quite know how to describe this book, but I sure wish I had Vivian Paley for my kindergarten teacher. She explores social rejection among young children, and how we might be able to eliminate it and include everyone. It's a very important topic and the book is a fascinating account of the attempt and discussion in her own school, but I need to know how this experiment turned out long term. Honestly, I may have missed some of the message here because of the way the Paley wove in a fictional...more
An awful style of writing coupled with an overarching point that I can't agree with. I am a teacher, and consider it my job and responsibility to ensure that students are not bullied or ridiculed, but it is NOT my job to insert myself into the unstructured play and demand that so-and-so be included in an activity during recess. In my opinion, we prevent physical harm and deal with situations of abuse and bullying, but it is up to each child to carve out his or her own identity and deal with the ...more
You Can't Say You Can't Play tells the story of Paley's decision to make these six words the rule in her Kindergarten classroom. It's a short book, and it would be about half as long if one excised the italicized interludes relaying a story she wrote for her students and used to catalyze discussion about the "You can't say you can't play" rule. I find these italic sections dull and, to be honest, slightly weird, but Paley is incredibly sensitive and her observations have me completely ...more
I'm reading this now for a class. Vivian Paley has been very influential for my practice with children. She writes simply about her daily role in her classrooms and about her responses to the children. Her work is deep and authentic. She has high expectations for herself and the children she works with, and a huge amount of respect. In this book she is dealing with children's rejection of each other in play. It is an action research piece, with Paley trying to uncover the roots of the rejection ...more
I really liked this book. So radical and yet so obviously right at the same time.
I do wish she had spent more time describing the children's reaction, adaptation to the new rule. I also got a little tired of the story she made up for the children, which is woven through the narrative. about deciding to apply the rule and eventually doing so. About half way through I started just skipping the story, but then I went back later and read it.
I want to share this with all the ...more
I do wish she had spent more time describing the children's reaction, adaptation to the new rule. I also got a little tired of the story she made up for the children, which is woven through the narrative. about deciding to apply the rule and eventually doing so. About half way through I started just skipping the story, but then I went back later and read it.
I want to share this with all the ...more
Thanks, This American Life iPhone app - I heard this author speak on a show about kids' cruelty toward other kids. Her very simple experiment done over one year in her Kindergarten class is the subject of this book. Her discoveries are sad and encouraging at the same time.
I skipped through the fairy tale the author made up to demonstrate her ideas to her students, but her commentary on the reaction of her students to her new rule was fascinating. If only every teacher who works with ...more
I skipped through the fairy tale the author made up to demonstrate her ideas to her students, but her commentary on the reaction of her students to her new rule was fascinating. If only every teacher who works with ...more
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This woman seems to be a great teacher and is definitely a great at looking at things from a child's perspective. She argues well for her "you can't say you can't play" rule in the classroom, and I hope to make to a rule in our house as well. Teachers of elementary school should definitely read this book.
I gave it only three stars because, well, it's nonfiction (personal preference). And I didn't totally love the magpie stories, though I realize their purpose in her clas...more
I gave it only three stars because, well, it's nonfiction (personal preference). And I didn't totally love the magpie stories, though I realize their purpose in her clas...more
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I was amazed that I was able to read this book in one night; often I read this sort of thing because I think I should or that it will be good for me and my kiddo. This was a pleasure to read, very sensitively written and insightful. Here is the kindergarten teacher I want my kid to have! The only complaint I had about the book is not really about the book after all... the book is written by a teacher, about school children, and focuses totally on exclusionary play at school. As a parent, I wish ...more
Ehh... what can I say? It was a school book required for one of my courses. The idea is a good one, and a rule that would be nice to implement in all classrooms, but the 132 pages of it and the coinciding story of Magpie was unnecessary. The theory could have been broken down much more simply, and in a much shorter book.
Lately I've been reminded almost daily, from adults and kids alike, that we really do learn how to make our way through the world at a very young. We learn patterns of behavior that stick with us forever, or take incredible undoing to change as adults. I think teachers should re-read this book every fall. We have tremendous jobs.
Plus I like this paragraph:
The classroom seems all tumult and tears this year. My disapproval floats above us like a dark cloud, raining on one chi...more
Plus I like this paragraph:
The classroom seems all tumult and tears this year. My disapproval floats above us like a dark cloud, raining on one chi...more
Jobiska (Cindy)
added it
A myth involving a magpie woven in to the author's experiences with a kindergarten (?) class. My son's preK teacher extracted the myth and read it to her class. Too bad that school wasn't truly able to extend the spirit of this book to my son. Oh well!
I read this book for a class. If the concept could be a rule beginning in kindergarden and followed throughout a student's school life and beyond, then it might actually eradicate excluding others from participating in activities.
I skipped the Magpie stories after the first three or so because I didn't find them helpful but I thought the account of what she did with her class was interesting and thoughtful.
I would recommend this for any parent or teacher of a school age child. Although her classroom is a Kinder class, she interviews all the way up through 4th or 5th graders. That said, I'm a bit torn, I don't think things are as easy as she makes them seem to be. I'd love to discuss it with someone.
This is a great book that examines the implementation of the rule "You can't say you can't play" with a Kindergarten class and brings to light the impact of rejection.
Great introduction to the topic of inclusiveness in the classroom and in any social setting. I would have liked a follow-up, though, after a few years of applying this rule to the classroom...after time to really explore its impact.
Jacqlyn
rated it
Recommends it for:
people who love educational development
Recommended to Jacqlyn by:
a teacher
This woman is really great. She has an incredible sensitivity to children and their learning processes. What does happen when you have to be nice and respectful to all your classmates?
Paley is a thoughtful teacher and stepping into her classroom makes you think.
"And play, as we know, will soon be the game of life." (pp20)
Great ideas and makes me rethink a lot of classroom things
Good use of stories
I've been interested in kids and social exclusion, and the parts of the book that detail Paley's in-class experiment were fascinating: kids from five to about eleven debate the pros and cons of the new rule.
A large part of her work is done through storytelling, and the parallel narrative with the princess, magpie, dragon, etc., I could have done without.
A large part of her work is done through storytelling, and the parallel narrative with the princess, magpie, dragon, etc., I could have done without.
She's visiting the research preschool at Stanford this week, so I'm inspired to read her stuff, which seems to motivate the practices at the school, which seems to result in some pretty unusual kids.
Also related to the recent "civility in discourse" kick I've been on recently... maybe it all starts here...
Also related to the recent "civility in discourse" kick I've been on recently... maybe it all starts here...
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